Title: By the Skin of Your Teeth
Rating: General.
Pairing: Morgan/Reid.
Summary: Something's bothering Reid, and Morgan can't quite place what it is.
Disclaimer: I do not own Criminal Minds, nor these characters.
Prompt: Take a risk.
Authors Note: I just wanted to say thank you to everyone who takes the time to review my stories, it means a lot to me, and I know it takes me forever to reply, but I really do appreciate it! :)
By the Skin of Your Teeth
The only thing more damning and time consuming then being out in the field was being inside, filing paperwork that had been put off for the past five days. Derek leaned back in his chair, arms behind his head as he let out a tired sigh, at least in the field they could be doing something productive. The clock on the wall was an antique, and with every noise it made Derek wanted to throw it onto the floor and smash it with his foot repeatedly, but these were new shoes and he let it go for the moment. Dark brown eyes took to scanning the room, looking for anything out of the ordinary, or anything that could distract him for a moment or two. What Derek found was Spencer sitting up right in his chair, pen in his mouth and eyes staring blankly at his desk.
That was something worth noticing as Spencer usually handled these days in the best sort of mood. Spencer liked paperwork, in fact, Derek was almost daring enough to say that he loved writing things out methodically and placing them in order into a multitude of different folders, with different labels and different colors. Derek figured it was a lot easier on him psychologically, on all of them really, but more so with him. These type of days usually involved Spencer drinking a ton of coffee, eating sugary treats and listing a slue of random facts that Derek really didn't care for, but sort of remembered. What was different today?
Derek began to worry as he noticed Spencer hadn't moved in more than five minutes, he just sat there with no real intent or purpose. The older agent furrowed his brows in concentration, wondering if maybe something had happened with his mom, some sort of decline in health or a unpleasant conversation. It really wasn't any of his business, but Derek couldn't help but worry slightly, he was Spencer's friend, however. He knew him well enough to know when his behavior was abnormal, and face looked a little pale. Picking up a pen, Derek made sure the cap was on before throwing it at the man across from him, causing Spencer to flail about a bit.
"What was that for?" he questioned, hand clutching at his chest, right above where his heart lay, probably going faster now than it had the last hour.
"I'm getting coffee, you want some?" Derek wouldn't directly ask Spencer what was wrong. No, he would leave that in his arsenal for later if he needed it.
"Uh, sure?" Spencer looked as though he had come back from the dead. Whatever he had been thinking about, it had absorbed all of his attention.
Derek stepped into the break room, making a b-line for the coffee maker. The damn thing was constantly having to be refilled as no one could properly function around here without it. The office had gone through three of them in the past two months, all of them had been reportedly overworked. The person in charge finally put in for a decent one, and this coffee maker was lasting much longer than its predecessors before it. Derek gave it another two weeks before he figured it was gone, and chaos resumed as people suffered from caffeine withdraw.
Derek had this awful habit of believing he could juggle more than one cup, and as such, often stained the floor and lost most of the precious cargo. This time, however, he made an effort to get the two ceramic mugs to their destination without incident. Spencer sort of depended on it, or at least in Derek's mind he did. In the end, Derek's mission was successful and Spencer didn't have to spend a half an hour trying to soak up the rich flavored substance from his work files with his tie. Derek sat on the edge of Spencer's desk, staring at him with a look that he hoped conveyed 'Please talk to me.'
He was mildly successful as Spencer asked him what time it was.
"Eleven," Derek replied a bit defeated, which earned him an odd glance from those naturally wide eyes. He leaned back, turning his head and feigning a cough. Those eyes could coax a confession from anyone if they so chose, and Derek wasn't taking a chance.
Spencer continued to look at him."You okay?"
"Sore throat, think I slept with my mouth open last night," Derek answered, laughing. Spencer began to laugh also, and okay, that was a good start. If he couldn't get Spencer to tell him what was wrong, maybe he could ease the situation.
"You look tired, get enough sleep last night, Youngster?" Derek asks, placing his words into a joking manner for good measure.
"Uh, yeah? Just, my brains been all over the place a lot...more than usual," he said, and suddenly the pale of his cheeks flushed and his eyes diverted themselves.
That was odd.
Derek didn't want to ask him outright. For the time he had known Spencer, he had tried to give him the space and opportunity to approach him if ever there was something wrong. He bit his lip, weighing his options. If something was seriously wrong, he would never forgive himself for not asking. Spencer had a bad habit of keeping things to himself until he couldn't possibly keep them in anymore, and Derek didn't want that to happen, not if he could help him now instead of later. Derek opened his mouth to speak, but was interrupted by an authoritative voice behind him.
"Any reason your sitting on top of Reid's desk, Morgan?" Aaron inquired, a faint smirk to his face as Derek looked over his shoulder guiltily.
"My chair broke? It hurts my back...I hate paperwork," Derek settled as he stood up, Spencer was laughing at him. Penelope snickered to herself, hand over her mouth as Aaron looked over at her.
"You should file a request for a new chair, then."
Derek's face fell."That involves even more paperwork," he complained.
Aaron had no real malice behind his words, and it was nice to see him a bit relaxed. Those moments had been far and few between these last few months. Penelope made her usual banter, and Derek was more than happy to take part in the flirting. She left, following after Aaron over a personal matter or something along those lines. Once the two were both out of sight, Derek returned his gaze to Spencer, softening his expression at his awe-like expression.
"What's wrong?" Derek poses, catching Spencer off guard with the gentleness that Derek only used when speaking on a personal matter. Spencer straightened up in his seat, eyes roaming everywhere but on Derek, and yeah, that was an interesting response.
"I just...I can't concentrate like normal," Spencer answered, and he might have just took first place in the vaguest answer Derek had ever received.
"Really, what's wrong? I might be able to help," Derek pressed, but not too far. From experience, he knew never to push Spencer too far. The potential consequences were not worth the risk, he had determined a long time ago.
Spencer twists the pen Derek had thrown at him early in his hand, pulling the cap on and off a couple of times."I really, I'm fine," Spencer answered this time a little bit more forceful and resolute. The elder of the two knew when to drop it, and right now was that time. Derek nodded his head, smiling a little to try and ease the tension that seemed to pour over Spencer in waves. "Okay," he said before returning back to his desk.
Well, he had tried.
An easier way of saying he failed.
The next three days were spent in St. Paul, Minnesota. When they were in the field it was easy enough to ignore their own problems and thoughts, and place them on the back burner while they focused all of their energy and resources on the case at hand. However, as soon as they got back and got settled, Spencer presented himself to the forefront of Derek's mind once again. That odd behavior he had exhibited early on was back again, and while Spencer strove to hide it better, it was still detected by Derek and a few others on their team. The hardest thing for Derek was remaining silent.
The whole ordeal was grating on his nerves, and he wanted to know what was wrong, not because he was nosy, but because he really cared. Actually, he cared a lot. When he first met Spencer, he looked at him as some child prodigy who was out of his element and playing with the big boys. Derek didn't think he would last a week, and look at him now. Spencer had surpassed the expectations that were placed on him, but he was still a kid in Derek's heart, and that caused him to want to help take care and protect him.
When that had happened, Derek wasn't really sure, but he suspected that it had a lot to do with them growing closer and bonding as friends. Besides Aaron and Penelope, Spencer was the person he had known the longest. Derek had watched as Elle left and eventually Jason, who left a hole in Spencer's heart much like his father had, and Derek figured he could never forgive him for that one. Derek could forgive Jason for wanting out, for not being able to take it anymore, but he could never forgive him for the damage he had caused Spencer. While Spencer wasn't fragile, in fact, he had endure things Derek couldn't imagine, he still didn't deserve to have people abandon him.
In all honesty, Spencer would probably be his last reason in not wanting to walk away. Derek didn't love his job as much as he was infatuated with it. In his heart he knew he could never walk away entirely, but that stubbornness was driven deeper by not wanting to leave Spencer alone and wondering if it was his fault. If the genius ever decided to leave, Derek knew it would be a hard pill to swallow. Actually, a lot of things about Spencer were hard to understand and accept.
This was insane, he mused.
The paperwork that needed to be done sat their idly, but not by a lack of effort. Derek would raise a piece of paper in his hand and stare right through it, thoughts absorbed by the sulking man sitting just a few feet away from him. This was frustrating, and how could he bribe Spencer to do his paperwork if he was too depressed to do his own? That joke didn't help him, and he was glad it stayed in his head instead of vacating his mouth. Derek chewed on his pen absentmindedly, nearly leaping out of his chair when Spencer called his name right beside him.
Spencer laughed at Derek nearly falling out of his seat, caught off guard."You okay?" Spencer asked, and Derek wanted to tell him of course not, but kept it in. Spencer was talking to him, and that was an improvement from this morning where he sat staring at the wall, and not even the wall with anything on it.
"Just fine, what can I do for you?" he changed the topic, completely ignoring the fact he made a total jackass out of himself.
Spencer seemed to hesitate for a moment, and Derek's stomach lurched that this might be the opportunity he had been waiting for. "I was wondering if I could...um, ask you something," he finished softly, unsure of himself.
Derek looked at him reassuringly. "Of course, you want to go to the break room? It's empty right now," he offered, and Spencer gestured yes with a nod of his head.
The two escaped to the break room, and Derek took the extra step of closing the door. The paperwork they had left to do would still be there in the end, and they would do it, but Derek found this more important. Spencer bounced on his heels nervously, and Derek couldn't get a read on his body language or facial expressions. That was a little troubling, but he only tried to keep a neutral face about him. Finally, Spencer took a deep breath, smiling to gain a bit of courage.
"I was wondering if you..."
"If I...?"
"If you would like, um, you know? Never mind, I have a lot of paper work to do, and—"
"Reid, what is it?" Derek stopped him, so close and yet so far.
"I was wondering if you would like to get something to eat after work tonight, there's no case, and there's this really good Cuban restaurant, and the food is really great," Spencer rambled until Derek placed a hand on his shoulder, effectively stopping him.
"Spencer Reid, are you asking me on a date?" Derek questioned, not quite believing what he had just heard with his own ears. Spencer flushed. "Was trying to," he admitted.
"Is this what's been bothering you so much?"
"I just...had to take a risk? I guess, it was bothering me, and—"
"I would like to get dinner with you tonight," Derek said, a thankful smile spreading across his features. Here he was, worried that something was terribly wrong with Spencer. Derek had been afraid that he had been diagnosed,or his mom was sick...or he was depressed, or on the verge of relapse.
Derek took a deep breath, staring at Spencer with a thankful expression. "You had me really worried, Kid. Please, don't do that again," he pleaded.
"I won't, sorry," Spencer said, laughing to let go of some of the nervous tension. Derek had said yes, and this seemed to lighten the slender genius instantly.
"I guess we'll actually have to finish our work tonight to get there on time, huh?" he joked, opening the door for the other man.
"Yeah, but it'll be easy. If you want, you can slip me a few of yours," he offered.
"Already did."