A/N: 3rd attempt, 2nd ONESHOT, 1st all POV story. By the way, I wanna say thanks to all the reviewers who were kind enough to take their time to review my previous stories. I also wanna thank those who had put Deadly Intention and Truly Madly Deeply Unconsciously in their favourites and story alerts.
Disclaimer: I do not own La Corda D'Oro
When It All Falls Apart
Confession of the Fallen
"Class, take out your textbook," the teacher ordered. "Turn to page 140."
She rummaged through her school bag before taking out her thick textbook, placing it on her desk.
The lesson became less and less interesting as she attempted to stay wide awake.
Then, she started doodling in her notebook as soon as she lost interest in the lesson.
And then she scribbled his name.
Her eyes widen as soon as she realized it and she began crossing out his name.
She then, gazed out the window emptily. It was raining. That was how they lost each other. It happened in the rain.
She promptly wiped the flood of tears brimming in her golden eyes as her thoughts visualized an image.
The image of her…
Being happy…
With him.
But that was then. This is now.
Things were never the same without him.
Things were different.
It got a lot gloomier, joyless and loveless.
Gone were those days.
Those days that contained happiness, laughter and music.
Music.
Music was how they know each other.
And the music was Ave Maria.
Ave Maria.
The piece that they both loved and cherished.
The piece that connects them.
Every time she played it, all those sweet memories would come running back to her.
And that made her happy.
Every time she ended it, she would curve a weak smile with tears glistening in her eyes.
The memories of his and her were delightful to be recalled and yet, it was painful to let go of it.
Pain.
That was the only thing she could feel these days.
Everytime she closed her eyes, the images of him would come back and haunt her.
And it hurts her.
It hurts her that the images wouldn't fade away.
It hurts her that it would haunt her every night.
It hurts that it would make appearances in her dreams as if she was one to be blame.
And then she would wonder why does he leaves her when she needed him the most.
Then, she would recall the times when they were together.
Those times where she was happy, cheerful, carefree and…
In love.
So was he.
They were in love with each other.
But when she thought about it, it was funny how love brought them together and yet, love was that separated them.
Love.
Curse that crap.
But then again, that was then.
No matter how painful it was, how hurt she was, there was absolutely nothing she could do about it.
She could cry buckets of tears and he still wouldn't come back to her.
She would try to commit suicide to clear her mind but she knew it was a foolish thing to do and suicide wasn't the solution to her problems.
Besides, she had tried it before.
By cutting her wrist.
Lucky her, she was saved by her fellow friends.
And then she was sent to rehab.
But it still wasn't enough to heal the pain.
Everytime she's alone, her mind would drift away to who-knows-where.
And it would reach her to him.
Everytime she saw w couple of young lovers strut in front of her, holding each other's hands, she would think of him.
That was what they used to be.
Lovers.
And it pains her that they were no longer one.
The pain was unbearable.
She would do anything to have him again and she would give anything to be his once more.
But she knew it wasn't possible for them to be together again.
They all knew it was impossible.
Because it was way too late.
Confession of the Helpless
She was sad.
She was depressed.
She was lonely.
She no longer wears that smile.
That smile.
That smile that makes his heart skips a beat.
She was his friend.
No, she was his close friend.
They had each other's back and they also had each other's shoulder to cry on.
But this time it was different.
He couldn't help her.
And for that, he felt useless, pathetic.
He would blame himself for not be able to comfort her.
For not be able to wipe those tears away.
For not be having enough courage to confess his feelings for her.
He loved her.
And it wasn't because she was his first love.
His first crush.
His first love interest.
It was because of her, he knew the meaning of falling love.
It was because of her, he learned to love someone more than a friend.
But now that she was feeling down and gloomy, he feels stupid, foolish and useless for not doing anything to help her.
Now it was way too late, she was no longer the girl he once knew.
She was no longer the girl he once loved.
And still loved.
She wasn't smiling.
She barely smiles.
She'll never smile again.
At least not like how she used to.
Everytime she tries to at least, smile at him, he could sense that the smile wasn't exactly real.
It was fake.
She was so hurt that the pains she felt reflected on her smile.
And her eyes.
He couldn't bear to see her like that.
But obviously, there was nothing he could do to prevent it from happening.
It had already happened.
And it was unavoidable.
Confession of the Friend
He was close enough to prevent it from happening.
He was close enough to encourage her.
He was close enough to understand her.
He was the closest person to her at that time.
And worse, he was her best friend.
The one that knows everything troubling her.
He wanted her to be happy and he let her be.
And so she was.
But now, she no longer is.
In fact, she's the total opposite.
He wanted her to tell him what's bugging her mind.
And she did.
But not everything.
She never told him about her and that guy.
But he wasn't mad at her for doing so.
He respected her privacy.
He was mad at himself for building his hopes up without any qualms.
He was mad at himself for letting his guards down and let himself slowly fell for her.
Yes, he was in love with her.
And it pains him that she wasn't.
It pains him even more that she loves someone else. Someone who he wasn't very fond of. Someone who he wouldn't exactly call 'friend'.
Yes. She fell in love with That Guy instead of him. The loyal, faithful, supportive and understanding friend.
That wasn't the guy she fell in love with.
That was the guy she calls for when she needed help. The one she calls; her best friend.
He hated himself for bring the friend.
He despised himself for not being the one she'd fall for her.
But he never regretted being there for her.
What he regretted was for not discouraging her and preventing her from attempting suicide.
If it wasn't for him, she wouldn't have done that.
He regretted for not being the faithful and supportive friend he once was.
He regretted being mad when she chooses That Guy over him.
But he was glad that he was no longer mad at her.
He was glad that he had decided to get over it and apologized to her.
He was glad.
He sympathized her for her loss.
But he wasn't cruel enough to be happy when the guy left her.
In fact, he wanted to be there for her as her best friend.
And so he was.
He was there for her.
And he was proud of it.
He was proud that he made up to her.
He was proud that he was there for her.
He was proud that he was her best friend.
He was proud that he loved her.
Despite the fact that it was a one sided love.
A painful one.
Confession of the Hypocrite
He was perfect.
The perfect guy.
The perfect student.
The perfect person.
But little did anyone know that he was a liar.
A hypocrite.
He'd play nice just to please his grandmother.
No matter what he did, she'll never be pleased.
Let alone be satisfied.
But then, he lost it.
Lost the ability to control his emotions and his dirty little secret.
She knew he was a hypocrite.
And never looked at him the same way again.
He hated her.
So does she.
She hated him and loved someone else.
He hated her for doing so.
And then she fell apart.
For loving someone else, she fell apart.
It was that simple.
He had always liked the idea of watching her crash and burn.
Because of her falling apart, the others would experience the same.
She had a huge effect on everyone and he knew that with her giving up, they would be affected as well.
Except him.
He wasn't affected by her.
Instead, he affected her.
So much.
So much that she hated him.
But now that she'd fallen apart, things were never the same.
She was no longer the girl who would smile to anyone.
She was no longer the girl who was affected by him.
She was no longer the girl who affected so many people.
She was no longer the girl who everyone once knew and loved.
She was no longer Kahoko Hino, the girl who was determined, the girl who would give her best shot, the girl who wouldn't let the piece of crap he told her, stopped her.
Things changed.
People changed.
She changed.
He was happy that she was at her downfall yet, he felt guilty for feeling so.
He would be smirking when he heard that she had attempted suicide.
But he didn't.
Instead, he froze; his eyes widen in shock before he returned to his usual hypocrite self.
He would be smiling when he heard that the guy left her.
And he did.
But not for long.
Because he knew there was a kinder person in him.
He knew that he could be a better person.
Confession of the Honest
She was in despair.
She was in misery.
She was at the point of her life where nothing matters.
And she was his idol.
Because of her, he was able to find his ideal music.
The music he longed for.
The music he was looking for.
He had always admired her.
Her music.
It wasn't perfect, at least not as perfect as his.
It wasn't as perfect as his upperclassmen's music.
But he liked it.
Every time he woke up, he would be able to hear her music, the sweet melodies being played over and over again in his ears.
People might say that he had a crush on her.
But he knew better.
What he had for her was admiration.
And respect.
Admiration for her music.
Respect for her, as she was his senpai.
It was easy.
He liked her music.
No, he admired it.
But he never knew why.
Her music reflected her feelings.
Maybe that's why he liked it so much.
Yes, that explains why.
But that was then.
This is now.
Her music is no longer passionate.
The only thing he could hear was misery, depression and desperation.
He never knew why.
But he liked it.
It was pure.
And it doesn't change.
It was still honest.
It still reflects her feelings.
But it wasn't passionate.
He could see in her eyes.
He could hear it in her music.
Her passion for music.
It's gone.
Yes, she has less interest in music.
Since that day.
That day.
That day that will forever be remained in everyone's memories.
That day that leaves bitter, painful memories.
That day that has caused his idol's misery.
That day that forever changed the way things are.
That day that turned happiness and joy to despair and depression.
The day when Len Tsukimori died.
A/N: How's the story? Please review. For those who read Deadly Intention, I'm putting that story on hold. I'm terribly sorry.