Let Her Last Forever, a death note fanfic

DIS: I'm more than a little obsessed with Death Note at the moment. This is only my second attempt in this fandom, so if I screw it up...let me know! :)

Title: Let Her Last Forever

Rating: T for mild language

Genre: Drama/Romance

Summary: He wanted to hurt her, he wanted to kiss her, he wanted to kill her, and he wanted to hold her close. He wanted to steal her from Light Yagami, to ruin that perfect face of hers, but in the end, all he wanted was for her to look at him the way she looked at Light...but he knew that was impossible. One shot.

Disclaimer: I do not own Death Note

Notes/Warnings: L/Misa; one shot; second attempt in this fandom

Let Her Last Forever

"Misa, leave!"

There was a stark silence in the room, broken only by the blonde girl's tiny gasps of shocked air. At last, she whipped around and stormed from the room, slamming the door hard on her way out. L heard one of the other men say something to Light, but did not care enough to hear what was said. He focused on his chocolate-covered orange stick that he was eating, staring down at the papers that had been delivered to him and Light that morning. And while he was clearly reading through the words, he was not truly registering them, nor did he particularly care enough to know what precisely it was that was written on them. Instead, he was thinking more closely on what had happened a moment ago.

"...experienced violent palpations while dying..."

He certainly is rough with her, he mused as his eyes darted up and down as he read the Japanese script. Yelling at her constantly, man handling her half the time, and treating her like nothing more than a small child. He paused before slipping a forkful of cake in his mouth. Well, not that his belittling manner is uncommon. He does that to me and even his father. He certainly is full of himself, isn't he? He glanced at Light, who was scowling angrily at his laptop as he typed, pounding at the keys far harder than necessary. He doesn't like to be annoyed...and he doesn't appreciate interruptions in his work. He doesn't like when people disagree with him, go against him, or try to take his power. How very foolish of him to allow such personality traits to show through while he is being investigated as Kira...they are exactly the type of traits that Kira exhibits. Or perhaps he is not aware of them?

L considered this seriously for a moment and then determined, No, he hates that Misa tries to overthrow his power constantly. She doesn't understand that he wants nothing to do with her, yet she clings to him strongly. Yet her desire to overthrow his commands annoys him and sets him on edge.

"You know," L said at last, without looking to Light, "you needn't act that way with her. She only wants to be close to you."

"Yeah, well, I'm not interested in her," Light replied in a snippy tone.

L turned his head slowly to look at him, feeling a bubble of hatred begin in his stomach. It wasn't that he necessarily hated Light Yagami as a person – it was only the part that had inspired the Kira persona that he hated – but his treatment of Misa was uncalled for, even in the worst of circumstances. Granted, Misa did tend to be annoying at times, but she was also delightfully lovable to everyone around her. She never treated anyone poorly. She was dim at times, but also clever at others. She was completely open about herself to a point where she was almost asking to be taken advantage of by others. L admired her personality, yet Light seemed disgusted by it. What could make one man be able to be so cold towards a girl like Misa? L did not comprehend it at all and it angered him, perhaps more than it ought to have.

"What?" Light asked warily, noticing L staring at him.

"You do seem to have no heart," he remarked. "Tell me, was there ever a time where you truly felt love for someone, without needing a reason to love them?"

Light appeared even more irritated by him. "Of course I have, Ryuuzaki. I love my family unconditionally. Misa is just extremely difficult. It's hard to love someone so impulsive and stupid."

"Stupid?" L repeated, sounding vaguely puzzled. He took a drink of his tea and then said, "No, I think that might be the wrong word to describe Miss Amane. She may be impulsive at times, but I think she is clever enough to know what she is doing. I think you are just too dense to see what she is entirely." L took the last bite of his cake, the moistness of it sinking beneath the pressure of his mouth. "Mmm, delicious."

"Don't be ridiculous, Ryuuzaki," Light said coolly. "There is nothing of substance to that girl, nor will there ever be."

There was no doubt in his mind that Light and Misa were Kira and the second Kira – L was positive on this. He often had savage desires to kill Light when he spoke in such a manner, but his sense of justice often interrupted such thoughts. At times, he wished to kill Misa, simply to get her out of the picture, but then he would picture her face smiling at him whenever she was not calling him a pervert and he wanted to kiss her, to hold her close and protect her from the evils of the world. The mountain of emotions that tended to rise when he thought of gaining evidence to incriminate them both was often far too complicated and confusing for L to understand. Sometimes, when he knew no one else was awake, he would wander around the building restlessly, drinking tea that had gone cold, or eating treats that were no longer soft or were too warm or too cold. And, each time he fell upon Misa's floor, he would stand around, confused, and his eyes would always focus on her bedroom door for one brief moment before he would continue on. If he were Light, he could simply slip in and rest against her, cuddled to her warm body. But Light never took his opportunity.

And it was this that infuriated L the most.

Light held the possession of one thing that L knew he would never have, the heart of a girl who loved a monster, and there was no dissuading her. No matter how terribly Light treated her, she would always feel the need to remain faithful to him. And yet, in spite of all of this adoration, Light could not be bothered to control his temper for a moment to be kind to Misa. Instead, he either yelled at her or manipulated her emotions by hugging her or kissing her, fooling her into believe he gave a damn when, in reality, he simply thought that there was no "substance" to her.

"You truly are," L murmured, "a monster." Light paused briefly in his typing to glance at him. She would be happy with me if only I could make her as loyal to me.

"Love is a fool's emotion," Light responded, unbothered by the insult. "If it must exist, it should be tamed. Especially when we are in a situation where we are battling against Kira."

"No," L told him flippantly, "because you are Kira. Your probability has risen to sixty-four percent after this conversation." Light flashed him a dirty look. L hid a smirk. He knew how much Light hated his percentages.

"Ryuuzaki – "

"I think you've satisfied me, thank you," L interrupted. "I have some things to read through." Light watched him with an unfathomable expression as L returned to his papers, perched on his seat in his usual odd fashion. For one moment, L could have been sure that he saw red flicker through Light Yagami's eyes, but when he glanced back at him, Light had returned to his laptop and held a cold, calm façade. It was a mere mask to hide the rage at being dismissed by someone he viewed as lower.

L glanced up the screens and saw Misa was still raging in her room, appearing suitably upset.

How could I lose someone so full of life to someone who wishes to end lives? L wondered to himself. He pondered this a moment and then returned his gaze to his papers, biting into a truffle.

"...subject had bled severely from within from unknown causes..."

Finis

DIS: The two sentences in italics are drawn from the papers that L are reading, in case there was any confusion to that. In any case, please leave a review and let me know how you liked it! Ciao!