*actions character is doing*

Disclaimer: I don't own any Final fantasy 7 or final fantsy 9 charcters though I with I did own Zidane the cutie with a tail…oh well I hope you enjoy my very first fic and crossover….

*actions character is doing*

( ) is what I say or feel

[ ] scene changes or where scene is

[Alexandria Castle]

Garnet: Zidane?!?

Zidane:yeah??

Garnet: LET ME GO!!!!! Besides I need breathing space!!

Eiko: Dagger has an announcement to make!!!

Zidane: OH NO!!!  ARE YOU PREGNANAT?!?! I'M NOT READY!!!!! NO!!!!!! * faints *

Garnet: OH HELL NO I MADE YOU USE PROTECTION…REMEMBER???

Zidane: * gets up * Oh yeah!!!!

 Eiko: Fuck it Ur taking too long….. nerd face (doc tot) made a machine which warps up to another dimension using a summoners power…..

Vivi: I love it when eiko becomes impatient…she looks so sexy that way….

Everyone: * looks at Vivi as if he grew another head *

Steiner: Master Vivi!!!!

Vivi: shit!! Did I just say that out loud??

Everyone: * nods *

Amarant: hahhahhah not that sum funny shit!!

Quina: amarant smoke yummy yummies!!!!!

Zidane: damn! Amarant's high!!!

Doc Tot: oh yeah right there!!!!

Zidane: damn the doc's hired a whore

Doc tot:oh garnet I didn't expect you back so soon!! That will be all Sasha…

Garnet: that was….interesting…..

Eiko: ok enough talk can we go now…damn….and quina we all know you wanna get laid but stop thinking about the doc's cock in Ur mouth ok

Doc tot: ahem…ok bye everyone and garnet come back in one piece * the crew left *

            Cause I wanna hit that shit!!!

 

Tifa: so anywayz….Cloud do you like my shirt??

Cloud: mm-hmmm  *not even looking up *

Tifa: great Aeris's back!!! Didja bring back the beer??

Cloud: Tifa don't be dumb aeris is dead!!!

Tifa: no the planet thought she deserved to live since she destroyed meteor!

Cloud : yeah right…

Aeris: wow tifa I like that shirt!!! I'd like it better off of you--

Cloud: Lesbians!!!

Tifa: thx for the help Aeris…I knew that would get his attention!!

Cloud: Dammit!!

 Outta nowhere Barret showes up!

Tifa: * whispers sumthing to Aeris *

Aeris: OK!

Tifa & Aeris: OMG!!!!!! BARRET WE NEVER NOTICED HOW SEXY YOU ARE!!!!

Aeris: Have you been working out??

Barret: uuuuuh yeah!!!

Tifa: Aeris back off!!! Barret's my man!!!!

Aeris: Hell No!!!! You can have Cloud!!!

Tifa: No Cloud's too skinny…and Barret has more muscles!!!!

Aeris: so what you can still have him!!!

                       RedXIII shows up and watches the girls argue over barret and who should take cloud!!!

Cloud: thatz fucked up man!!!

RedXIII: yup….Hey Cid!!!

Aeris and tifa: * stopped arguing over barret and ran to cid * CID!!!! Omg …..

Barret: thatz sux…oh well hey Vincent watches out for the fickle twins….too late!!!

    Yuffie wakes up (she was sleeping on the couich)

Aeris, Tifa, Yuffie: VINCENT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Cid: damn Aeris and Tifa had tooo much sugar!!!

Cloud: what's yuffie's excuse??

RedXIII: she just thinks he's hot!!!

Yuffie:umm guys are you sure we destroyed meteor??? I mean did aeris destroy meteor??

Everyone but yuffie: Yeah

Yuffie: well what's this light!!!!

Everyone rushed to the window to see what's up and the light landed right outside of Tifa's 7th heaven. Then the light was gone and the Zidane and the crew were standing there!!!

FF7 crew: AAAAAHHHHHH!!!!! ALEINS!!!!!!!!

Zidane: aliens?? Do they mean us??

Steiner: no they mean you monkey boy!!!!

Amarant: Hahaahaa * staggers into Tifa's 7th Heaven

Vivi: I knew we should've left his high ass home!!!

    They all rn in after him trying to stay away from the ff7 crew!! Then another light appeared and there stood the author (me!!!!) Lea….

Lea: *walked inside * Damn!! Can this story be more boring??

Everyone looks at Lea

Lea: Man you guys are dumber than me!!!!!!

Yuffie: was that an insult??

Vincent: no shit sherlock!!!

Amarant tifa and Aeris: Hehhehhehhe….he said shit!!!!

Lea: hahhahhaha

Cid what's so funny * looking at Lea *

Lea: Amarant laughing!!!!

Cloud :you know those guys??

Lea: yeah and Barret needs to stop trying to hit on Garnet!!

Barret: Hey baby hows bout you an me get together an---

Zidane: *hold his dagger to barret's throat * talk to her again and I'll slit Ur throat next time!!!

Lea: Guys this is supposed to be a funny story not a…..umm not a….

Vincent: not a what??

Lea: I forgot….oh barret I think tifa's drinking the last beer

Barret: oh hell no!!!

Zidane thatz right better had!!!

Garnet: zidane I'm pregnant

Zidane: * Faints *

Garnet: well at least I shut him up for a while

Lea: Let me introduce everyone!!!

RedXIII: how do you know eveyone

Lea: I played both games Nanaki!!!

RedXIII: …….

Lea: FF7 meet FF9..so now that we know each other lets have fun!!!!

Vivi: did anyone notice that Freya or cait sith hasn't said anything sice the story started??

Freya: because that slutty author hasn't given me any lines!!!!

Cait sith:…ME neither

Lea: *thinks to a point where her head hurtz *

Cloud :so what are we gonna do?

Cait sith: I dunno

Lea: did she just call me slutty??

RedXIII: thatz the author….Damn she's real slow

Lea: lets play 7 min in heaven

Garnet: make it 14 and I'm in!!!

Eiko: we're short a girl!

Lea: garnet,----

Garnet: call me dagger!

Lea: Dagger,eiko transport Beatrix here

Steiner: :-D

Eiko: actually she's been here you just never gave her lines to say

Lea: oh ok….

Beatrix: Finally you whore I've been waiting for too fucking long!!!

Freya: go ahead Beatrix give that slut a piece of Ur mind!!

Lea: * cries *

Zidane: Freya that was just rude….

Dagger: whene did you wake up??

Freya: zidane look at her outfit …she might not be a whore but a slut yeah

Zidane: Lea you cute in that shirt… *leans in to kiss her *

Dagger: Zidane I'm pregnant!!!

Zidane:*  faints*

Lea:thanx I would've kneed him in the groin.

Dagger: no you would've let him kiss you Ur right!!!

Eiko: who's up for 14 min in heaven…cause I am

Vivi: I love that dress on eiko…. Yellow soo looks good on her!!!! She looks so hot in I woner what she looks like with it off…..what?

Lea ewwww vivi's hard!!!!

Vivi: no I'm not

Lea: * walks away unnoticed *

Eiko: yes you are and where did Lea go??

[behind the bar]

 Cloud: I don't think I should let you chug down Ur third can of beer….

Yuffie: why not this is my fourth….and something to tell you Vincent I gots

Lea: * chugs down 3rd can*

Vincent: Yuffie get away from me??

Yuffie: * Passes out*

Lea: don't all 20 of you got sumthing to do??

Aeris: she better go lay down

Tifa: yeah she's seein double or triple!!!

Lea: I no need to lay down lets play daor or truth *grabs another beer from the cooler *

Barret: shoyuld we let her drink that much Tifa??

Tifa: I dunno *chugs down her 5th can *

 Lea: I forgot to tell you sumthing…….*gives a blank look * uhhhh….uhhhhh

Vincent:she Forgot!!!!!! Hahhahhahhahhaaaa

Everyone blinks

[in the basement]

Amarant: *smoking weed * haahhahha this is sum good shit!!!

Cait Sith: Damn this sucks I can't fell this shit cause of this toy body

  Out of nowhere sephiroth appears

Sephiroth: HA!!! I didn't die….so now I will get my revenge

(by now everyone here is high)

Cloud: come onm relax

Cid: yeah we got sum new stuff for you to try out!!!

Sephiroth: ok… *takes a big puff ,Falls to da gorund *

Cait Sith: OMG he's having a seizure!!!!!!!

Sephiroth:* stops shaking*

Amarant: hahhahha he's dead!!!!

Cloud: * long pause * YO!!! Pass that shit!!!!!

Cid: No I'm next *attacks cloud *

Narrator: that was weird I think our author had been reading too many of Dee's Legend of dragoon stories!!!! I'll end this insanity now!!!!!

Lea: hey narrator don't end the story now come party with us!!!

Narrator:sure but let me do this real fast * locks lea in a bedroom *

Now let's party!!!!!!

The end…for now

So feel free to flame my story itz my very first fan fic….

So flame me and be totally honest!!!