Another 2 A.M.
A Post Finale Instant Star One Shot
By: LadyKatyUltimateFan
Hi everyone! I just wanted to write how I think everything should have went down after the series finale of Instant Star! I watched it tonight because one of my friends had it, and I was a little displeased even though it could have been worse. This is actually my second Instant Star fic, but my other one has yet to be posted, and I dont know if I will ever post it because I don't do well with stories with multiple chapters. I prefer to write one shots, and that fic has multiple chapters.
Anyway, enough of my rambling! Please tell me what you think about the fic! I really did enjoy writing it and I actually think I would have enjoyed reading it too, but I'm very partial. ENJOY every! And yes, this story does contain spoilers if you haven't seen the series finale of Instant Star!
Disclaimer: Sadly, I don't own Instant Star because if I did, I would have added this or something like this to the ending of the series finale! Thanks!
Another 2 A.M.
I wasn't ready to let Tommy go, but there comes a time in every girl's life where she has to blossom into her own butterfly. I wasn't particularly proud of my decision, but I was ready to be on my own for once. Nobody holding me back, nobody telling me what to do. I am Jude Harrison, I don't need everyone else telling me who she is.
Jude paced around her apartment. She was stressed out again. When she arrived to London, everything seemed so scary and new and exciting. Now she just wanted to go home. Sadie told her it would happen. Sadie told her she would get homesick, but Jude was so sure of herself. She was so sure that she could handle it and now when she felt so low she couldn't bare it, she didn't have anyone. Jude flopped down on her couch. She had a new boss, who was even scarier than Darius due to his extremely elegant British accent and all of the people that worked at the label seemed snobby and dressed more high class than Sadie could ever have imagined. She didn't fit in at all. The fact that she was the first ever Instant Star meant nothing to them. Everyone thought she would be just like the rest of the North American artists they'd ever signed and as many times as she tried to prove that she wasn't like other artists at all, she'd just become more like one. Nothing was good enough for Jude anymore, everything seemed to be terrible in comparison to G Major and everyone that worked there. No producer was good enough for Jude, but then again that was obvious because no producer in London was Tommy. "Why doesn't anyone like me here? I'm not selfish, I'm not a snob and I am certainly not crazy or high maintenance. What's wrong with me?" she said quietly while trying to reason everything out.
Realization comes with loneliness. I figured that out faster than most. I have become snob musician. I needed saving but this time there was nobody here to catch me as I was falling. No Sadie, no Jamie, and definitely no Tommy Q. I'm slowly turning into the one person that I never wanted to be.
No matter what Jude did, everything seemed to lead her to believe she was better off at home. She probably was, people loved her there and whereas Darius wasn't the most amazing boss, she always had Tommy to help her persuade him. Here, she had nobody to help her from the inside. Jude looked at the clock. It was already 1:10 in the morning. She sighed and rubbed her face in her hands. "I need this, I need to be free, I need to be on my own." She spoke aloud to herself often because she had nobody else to talk to, and she'd somehow become her own new best friend. "I'm prepared for everything that comes next. I am Jude Harrison and I may have been an Instant Star, but I've got guts and I'm here to make the music that I want, my way," she said to herself.
She sat there on the couch for a few more minutes. "I should probably get to bed." She got up and started getting ready for bed. She had a nightly routine, and it started the first night she got there, even though she was in a hotel for three days. While she cleaned up her apartment, she thought about Sadie and wondered how she was doing. "I have to give her a call tomorrow," she said aloud making a mental note. While she was brushing her teeth she thought about Jamie. She wondered how he was doing with his label and if Zeppelin was treating him right. "She probably is treating him right. He always deserved better than me. I should call him too." She had made another mental note aloud. Jude looked up in the mirror after she was done washing her face and brushing her teeth. She didn't even know who she was anymore. At first, that was a part of the excitement and the thrill of being in a new place. It's a way for her reinvent herself and Jude liked that, but it was hard to be who she wanted to be while maintaining who she had always been. Jude did not like that part about it. She changed and thought about the events that would occur tomorrow. As she climbed into bed and shut off the light, her thoughts transferred elsewhere. Tommy Q. was the only thing on her mind from the time she went to bed until the time she woke up.
Jude would stare at the empty space in her bed. Tommy could have been there, and she knew he was more than willing to settle down for her, forever. She just couldn't do it. She was more in love with adventure and music than settling down, even if it was with the man of her dreams. She knew he was hurt, but she knew he'd be okay. She was actually more worried about herself these days anyway. She wasn't the most loved artist at her new record label, and she was unable to please everyone so far. Basically, Jude had only been there a week and a half but she was already in hell.
So I wasn't exactly happy with my new record label, or living situation, but it was my choice and no matter what, I was sticking with it. I wasn't going to back down on the one thing that I needed more than anything, or at least that's what I've been telling myself. Whatever gets me through the night is what I would tell myself. I really just needed to make new friends, but that seemed impossible, especially since I was known as that "Snobby Instant Star." They obviously haven't met Karma overseas.
Jude was used to not sleeping well at night. She heard noises in her new apartment. Clicks and clanks and creaks all in the walls and the appliances, but tonight, she heard something louder than those noises. She rubbed her face intensely as she thought about what it could be. "Someone is not knocking on my door. It's ten til two!" she exclaimed as she climbed up out of bed. She grabbed her guitar because she often used that as a guitar as a weapon when she was scared. What if it was a crazy fan that was trying to break into her apartment, she knew they'd eventually find her. Jude was truly scared and there was no Jamie next door to run to her rescue when she was in trouble again. There was nobody. Jude felt the tears of fear and a tad bit of frustration fall down her cheeks like wildfire. She did her best to stop them because tears wouldn't save her now. She needed to find the source of the knocking. She always thought that it was unreasonable to have blurred windows near the door, but she bought the place on impulse, so she really didn't look into windows located next to doors. She was trapped. She could either answer the door and risk it being a crazed fan, or she could call the police and have it be nothing.
I'd be the first person to admit that I was more scared than I had ever been in my entire life. I was scared when Meagan held me captive in my own basement, but that seemed minor because Jamie was right there, and even though he was oblivious as to what was going on, he was still right there whenever I needed him and he did come to my rescue. All of that didn't matter now, I was trapped in my own apartment because I was too afraid to open the door. Home was safer, and London … London was the scariest place I'd ever been in my life.
Jude finally decided to face her fears. She figured that she had a weapon, even if it was her favorite item in the whole world. She sighed and walked over the door. It was raining outside, she was unaware of that but she could hear the rain hitting the door more clearly now. "I hope whoever is out there isn't getting wet," she said to herself. She then shook her head and felt like smacking herself. "You're about to be faced with your biggest fear in the entire world and you're wondering if they're getting rained on." She threw her hands up with frustration. The knocking started up again. Jude slowly unlocked two of the three locks leaving the top latch locked so she could open the door and see who it was but it would remain somewhat locked. She reached for the doorknob slowly. She peeked out onto the doorstep.
When she saw who it was she shut the door as quickly as she could. She unlocked the top lock faster than she could breathe and reopened the door. She just stood there and stared at the person on the other side of the doorway. She still had the sniffles from her crying fiasco earlier. She sniffled a few times. "What are you doing here?" she asked while she looked at the clock. It was 1:59.The man on the other side of the door shuffled a little bit but then looked her dead in the eyes.
"I couldn't do it Jude." He said those five words like they were the hardest words he ever had to push out. He shuffled a few seconds more. He looked at his watch. "I had to be another 2 A.M."
Jude was unable to breathe for seconds at time. Fainting seemed like an excellent option right about now, but Jude couldn't even move to make that possible. She finally sighed and threw her arms around him once again. "Thank you," was all she could manage to say into his shoulder. After the two broke away, she invited him in and shut the door. The two sat down on her couch. The silence was murdering both of them, but Jude wasn't going to be the first one to talk, it was a death sentence for her. She'd mess it up again, and she didn't want that. Not when she more safe with just this one person here than she'd felt in the past week and a half. There was no way she was speaking first.
Since he knew her all too well and he figured she wasn't going to speak first, he took the liberty of doing so. "Jude, I know, I know that you aren't looking for someone to tie you down while you're here in London, but I need you. I can't function without you and I know that sounds pretty pathetic right now, but its how I feel, and I promise that I won't get in your way, but I need to be here with you. You said that this was your adventure, and you were ready to move on to the next step of your life, and so am I. I'm ready to be put on the backburner, I'm ready to be whatever kind of man you want me to be. If you want to get married and have kids, I have no problem staying at home and caring for them. I just, I need to be with you, I need you in my life." He concluded his rant as his eyes welled up with tears.
What kind of person would I be if I just let this grown man cry on my couch in my living room? Especially if I'd been in love with this man for as long as I can remember? As much as I hated to admit it since I left to be on my own, I wanted him here, I wanted to tell him that I wanted him here and I was going to do that even if it made me the biggest hypocrite in the world.
"Haven't you learned? There is no Jude Harrison without her Tommy Q." She let the words slip from her mouth so easily. He just stared at her, tears still welling up in his eyes. He shook his head and sniffled. He nearly sprung at her and threw his arms around her. He absorbed her entire body in a massive hug of all the intense feelings he'd been holding inside since she left him all alone a week and a half ago. "I love you more than anything Jude, and I know that I will love you until the day I die. Thank you so much." He was crying into her shoulder. "Tommy, I should be thanking you. I was stupid and I said I was ready to do this on my own, but I can't even attempt to do this without you. You knew that, and you came to my rescue. I love you for that and I love you for everything else. You're my guy Tommy Quincy, and if I can't be with you, then I don't want to be with anyone else on this earth." She was trying to comfort him because he'd obviously been through the most emotional week and a half of his entire life. Jude really did believe he'd changed from the first time she'd met him to now, where he was sitting in front of her begging her to love him like he loved her.
As much as she needed to be on her own, she needed to be with Tommy too. They didn't have to live together or even be together, they just needed each other nearby and in each other's lives. There was no doubt that the future of her love life was reserved for Tommy Quincy, and they both came to realize that throughout the remainder of the night. When Jude had Tommy, she was unstoppable. She was invincible. When Jude had Tommy, she was Jude.
There comes a time in every girl's life where she has to realize that being independent doesn't ever involve alienating herself from the people who love her and the people she loves most. Even though it took me a week and a half to realize that I was being completely ridiculous in trying to leave Tommy behind for my own selfish reasons. Even if we are heading for disaster or dangerous for each other, it would always be a minor blockade because no matter what happens, one thing was inevitable: there was always going to be another 2 A.M. and we were both more than okay with that.