Ever since the day I was born, I have lived in this stupid field with my stupid cousins and brothers and sisters. STUPID, STUPID, STUPID! I hate my life because all that I ever do is get annoyed by my stupid family and eat stupid grass. I think I will have a change of scenery from this stupid life and eating stupid grass in this stupid field with my stupid family. As I was walking around the stupid field looking for some stupid grass, I spotted this beautiful cow in the corner of the stupid and as I first laid my eyes in her, I fell in love. ALLELUIA! She looked up and smiled at me with her only four teeth which were yellow with beauty. She was black with wonderful white splodges oh, come to think of it; it might've been the other way. Anyway, who was I talking about? Oh yeah, Daisy. As I was walking over to my true love, I didn't notice that there was a 5cm x 5cm stump in the field. I tripped on the stump and fell into a big stupid ditch in this stupid field.
As I woke up a while later, I found myself in this stupid white room of some stupid kind. I looked around this stupid room and found my stupid owners stupid wife curiously looking at me like I was stupid. Well, maybe I am but it was really weird and... Stupid, if you think about it. I mooed stupidly and I felt stupid because I didn't feel like my stupid self. My stupid owners stupid wife stood up and ran to my side and looked at me even more stupidly than before
"Honey? Fred, my dear? Can you hear me? Are you feeling okay?" asked my stupid owners stupid wife.
"MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO" I replied stupidly.
"Oh sweetie, it is worse than I thought, you falling of that horse and all."
"Hoarse?" I answered stupidly thinking about the other type of hoarse.
"Yes dear, don't you remember?" asked my stupid owners stupid wife.
"Huh?"
"DOCTOR! I think my Fred's got amnesia! "Screamed my stupid owner's stupid wife hysterically. Sometimes I don't know what these stupid people talk about.
I hear another stupid person walk into this stupid room. "I think we should have a brain scan, just in case. Fred, this won't hurt a bit." Said the stupid person. Why were they calling me Fred? I am still a cow right? I feel strange...
I woke up again in a different kind of stupid room. It looked like the walls were in a stupid colour, pink, with pictures of cows on the walls. There seemed to be some kind of stupid clear wires that came out of me or whatever the stupid people call them. I saw the stupid owner's stupid wife again; she seems like my family. Annoying, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid... What was I saying? Oh yeah, stupid family.
"Sweetie, guess where you are?" asked my stupid owners stupid wife.
"In my stupid field, eating stupid grass, with my stupid family and... Daisy" I answered.
"NO! Who gave you that idea? Who's Daisy? Oh yeah, you've been in a coma for two months. How are you felling sweet pea?" asked my stupid owners stupid wife...
"I fell of a horse, got amnesia, and woke up, overall ... stupid." I answer knowing I was stupid.
"Well honey, I've waited two months for this..." then she leant over the bed pressing her lips against my floppy stupid ones, moving them in such a way. I felt a warm beat rush through my body, never ever have felt this before. I had never felt so happy and stupid at the same time. It was... WAIT! This is PRIVATE! Okay I'll skip this.
Sometime later, I woke up back in my stupid field and a stupid, STUPID, STUPID cow. Realising that my one true love isn't Daisy, it's my stupid owner's WONDERFUL wife. That shows to be sooo careful what you wish for. So watch out! If you're a farmer and you're names Fred, try not to fall off a horse! You could become me for a month or two!
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