The cherry trees stood watch over the open casket that was placed in the centre of the path at the foot of the hill. The light pink blossoms drifted slowly to the ground, some occasionally making a quick turn in the air before landing, covering the grey pavement with their soft colour.
One of them threatened to land on Tomoya's nose, but he quickly brushed it away with a light flick of the back of his hand, scowling at it with dark eyes. He leaned forward and slumped down low on the chair he was sitting on, amongst the other occupied chairs which were set in rows in front of the wooden coffin. He stared into the pavement, wanting to escape the blinding colour of pink. Green. White. In the trees. Around the coffin.
Sanae was sitting beside Tomoya, holding little Ushio who was wrapped in a small yellow blanket. The tiny baby lay there in her grandmother's arms, sleeping. Innocently unaware of the grim expressions that seemed to permanently mask the faces of those sitting around her. The people sitting in the rows of chairs were all dressed in either a black dress or a black suit, each one with their teary or emotionless eyes fixed to the person standing in front of the open casket.
Akio placed a hand inside the coffin and lightly touched his daughter's cheek with the side of his finger. Nagisa lay there, eyes closed and a gentle expression on her still face. She looked peaceful. Akio swallowed hard as he closed his eyes and turned around to face everyone who had gathered there. Taking a couple of steps forward, he drew in a long breath before he began his speech.
"My little girl was special. She might not have looked like much…she was small and frail…but she had the biggest heart in the whole world. She cherished everything around her. Every person. Every moment. And even when life knocked her down, she always got back up again, giving her all each time. That's what made her special. She was the light of my life. And I know that somewhere…somewhere up there…" Akio lifted his head slowly, gazing up at the grey winter sky. "She's still shining her light down on all of us."
He turned around to face Nagisa again, placing his hands on the side of the coffin as he leaned into it. He kissed his daughter's cheek and gave her soft brown hair a loving stroke.
"See you soon, Nagisa," he whispered.
When Akio returned to his seat beside Sanae, he quietly asked his wife if there was anything that she wanted to say. She decided that she would rather keep her words between her and Nagisa and stood at the coffin, holding Ushio up so that she could see her mother. Sanae spoke to her daughter in a soft murmur. Tomoya looked up slowly, watching Nagisa's mother speak to her as if she could actually hear her. Trying to show her Ushio as if she could actually see her. It made Tomoya's throat hurt. Nagisa couldn't hear her. Nagisa couldn't see her.
Kyou and Ryou were next to stand by the coffin. Ryou placed a pretty white flower in Nagisa's hair and smiled down at her as Kyou stood at the front to make her speech.
"I always had a lot of fun with Nagisa during our school days. Getting the drama club together…she might have thought that she was being selfish, but she ended up helping me and everyone a lot throughout her journey to making her dream come true. If it wasn't for her, well, I wouldn't have made all these wonderful friends. She'd always make me laugh with the cute little things she used to say. Whenever she was scared, she'd just suddenly blurt out 'anpan!' or 'hamburger!' like it was a completely natural thing to do," Kyou covered her mouth as she giggled nervously.
Everyone was too cheerless to laugh at the joke she'd tried to make. Her intentions of lightening the mood having only earned the odd sad smile amongst her peers, Kyou cleared her throat quietly as she continued with a serious expression.
"But even if she cried a lot…I think she was a happy person. And although each of us did our bit to support her be a good friend to her…it was all thanks to you, Tomoya… that she kept on smiling even when times got tough. So, thanks. Thanks for keeping Nagisa happy." Kyou gazed out at the man with genuine gratitude in her eyes and then bowed low, respectfully.
Tomoya just stared at nothing in particular, his expression completely blank.
Youhei was up next, and he stood next to Nagisa, taking a moment to get one last look at her before stepping up to speak to everyone.
"Nagisa was…um…she was pretty extraordinary. She was one of those really special people that you just can't help but liking. And I'm really grateful for everything she's done. She got my best friend out of his old delinquent ways and he turned out a better person because of it. I saw how much fun he had with her. He needed that. So…um…" Youhei swallowed hard, his voice becoming twice as raspy as usual. With teary eyes, he put on a big smile to hide his sadness, awkwardly rubbing the back of his head. "Thanks, Nagisa."
The others that came up in turn to see Nagisa did so in silence, standing at her side and staring down at Nagisa's body as they kept their thoughts to themselves. Mei came after Youhei who left the coffin crying into a handkerchief, followed by Tomoyo who placed a small stem of cherry blossoms at Nagisa's side. Yukine was next and she put one of her favourite books inside the coffin. Misae and Kouko came up together and the two women simply looked down at the girl, bowing in respect.
Tomoya wanted the whole thing to be over and sat there with his back hunched low, trying to tune everything out. However, the people that came up next made him lift his head slightly, half curious as to what was about to happen.
Yusuke, Rie and Sugisaka stepped up to Nagisa's open casket, followed by Kotomi who was carrying her violin and its bow at her side. After smiling down at her friend, Kotomi turned to face everyone. Yusuke and the two choir club members stood behind her.
"Nagisa always had so much love to give everyone. She shared her love with all of us, and we have all been brought together because of that love. We're like a big family," Kotomi was smiling sadly as tears welled up in her eyes. She continued to speak in a loud, confident voice. "We want to show Nagisa how much we all love her. And so…we have prepared a very special song to honour Nagisa's memory."
Kotomi slowly raised her violin to her chin, holding it out in front of her. As she pressed her bow to the strings, a few people watching her from the rows of seats couldn't help but cringe as they waited to hear another round of her terrible violin playing. But to everyone's surprise, she actually managed to play a proper note, elegantly sliding the bow across the strings in a steady sweep. It became apparent that she had spent a lot of her time in America working on her violin skills.
She counted quietly as she prepared the singers to start the song.
"One, two, three, four."
"Dango…dango…dango…dango…dango…dango…daikazoku. Dango…dango…dango…dango…dango… daikazoku."
With Yusuke, Rie and Sugisaka leading everyone, they all joined in to sing Nagisa's favourite song. Nearly all of them had tears streaming down their cheeks by the time they got half way through it, but still they sang. They sang for Nagisa.
A small figure was crouching behind the chair that Kouko was sitting on at the back row, completely unseen from everyone else. Fuko's ikiryo form, who was still wearing her school winter uniform, sung along quietly in her high-pitched half-whisper. A tear ran down her cheek as she grieved for her lost friend.
Tomoya was the only one who stayed silent. Everything was getting harder and harder for him to bear and when the song was finally over, he felt just about ready to get up and leave right then. As Kotomi and the others bowed and returned to their seats, Sanae softly put a hand on Tomoya's shoulder.
"You don't have to say anything. Just go up and see her one last time," she tried her best to smile.
Tomoya just shook his head and tried to erase the emotions that were building up inside him. Akio leaned forward and gave him a stern frown.
"This is your last chance, kid. If you don't say your goodbyes now, you'll regret it."
After sitting there with his back hunched over for a few more seconds, Tomoya finally sighed and stood up. His legs seemed to move on their own, his whole body and mind on autopilot. Before he knew it, he was standing at his wife's side with his eyes closed. Finally building up the courage to look at Nagisa, he swallowed hard as the young woman came into view. She looked so still and peaceful that Tomoya could have sworn that she was just sleeping. He wanted so badly to believe that was true. She wasn't dead. Any second now, she was going to open her eyes and smile up at Tomoya just like she always did. Everything was going to be fine.
But the longer Tomoya stared at Nagisa, the more real it became. He had lost the one thing that he loved more than anything else in the whole world. Nagisa was never going to open her eyes again.
Tomoya bit down hard on his lip, fighting back a whimper. His eyes stung as he fought back tears. With a shaky hand, he reached down into the coffin. Taking her cold hand in his, he held it tightly, bringing it up to his lips as he gave it a kiss. As he lowered his head, he wiped away tears that were forming in the corners of his eyes. Within a mere few seconds, they were streaming down his face and dripping from his chin. He sobbed uncontrollably. He let go of Nagisa's hand, letting it fall to her side as he lifted Nagisa's head up and held it to his chest.
"Nagisa…Nagisa, wake up," he begged in a breaking voice. "Please Nagisa! Nagisa, you can't leave me. I love you so much."
He rested his cheek on the top of Nagisa's head. "Please! Nagisa, come back!"
Tomoya wanted to take Nagisa and run. Up the hill that the two of them used to climb every day. Away from the coffin and their mourning friends and family. He didn't care where. Just as long as he was with her.
For a while, no one knew what to do as they stared helplessly at the grieving man. Akio eventually stood up and briskly walked over to Tomoya. He attempted to put a comforting hand on his shoulder, but he was pushed away by the strong arm that Tomoya threw out.
"It's okay, Tomoya. You're gonna be okay," Akio said in a low voice.
Tomoya's sobbing turned into cries of deep sadness, waking up Ushio who Sanae was still holding in her arms and making her shriek along with him. Everyone else just sat there, feeling a mix of sympathy and fear.
"Tomoya-" Akio tried again.
"Shut up! Just shut up and leave us alone!" Ushio's crying was starting to sound like nails on a chalkboard in Tomoya's ears and he could hardly take any more of it.
Sanae tried to calm the baby down by shushing her gently and rocking her up and down on her knee, trying to fight back her own tears.
"She's still here! Nagisa's still here! She's going to wake up and everything's going to be the way it was! We're going to be happy! Nagisa! Nagisa, come back!" Tomoya was holding his wife as close to him as possible, her face buried in his shirt.
"Tomoya, stop it!" Akio raised his voice. "Nagisa is gone, okay! She's…she's not coming back!"
Tomoya gazed up at his father-in-law with sad eyes, tears still pouring out of them. Then he looked back down at Nagisa as he carefully placed her back in the open casket. Why? The question echoed through his mind. It shouldn't have to be this way.
As Akio placed the lid onto the coffin, Tomoya's could feel his legs become shaky and start to give way. With a final sob he fell to his knees, slamming his fists into the ground. With a bitter lump in his throat, Akio called over Kyou, Tomoyo and Youhei to help him to lift the coffin so that it could be carried to the burial site. Everyone gathered together to stand around the coffin as the four of them stood at each corner and started to take it down the path laid with white and pink blossoms.
Sanae came over to Tomoya, holding Ushio who had managed to fall asleep again. She took one hand off the baby and extended it towards him, offering to help him up.
Anger and sadness blazed in Tomoya's eyes as he got up suddenly on his own, turning and sprinting up the path, in the opposite direction of everyone else. He ran up the hill as fast as his weary legs would let him.
Away from his friends. Away from Ushio. And away from Nagisa.