(Don't have to be) beautiful but it helps

Fandom: Fringe, Dirty Sexy Money

Characters: Alternate Lincoln Lee/Jeremy Darling

Rating: Mature

Wordcount: ~3,200

Summary: "Money could freeze you in time as efficiently as Amber."

Notes: AU for both universes, natch. DSM based on season 1, and the equivalent of season 1 for the Fringe Red'verse.

Thanks to Elf for the thumbs-up!

Written for the Self-cest Comment-Fic Meme (many prompts to be filled! go play!) using the following prompt:

Red'verse Lincoln Lee (Fringe)/Jeremy Darling (Dirty Sexy Money): Old boyfriends meet up again.


Even given the state of their world, some things still mattered. Money would always matter, until the end.

Most of the time, his family's wealth was completely irrelevant. Lincoln didn't bother with *stuff,* mostly, having seen far too much *stuff* devoured by Fringe events. But sometimes, there was a display of *stuff* so impressive even he had to take notice.

Like this, the display at Karen Darling's sixth (and final, for real this time, everyone agreed) wedding. She was finally marrying Nick George, who she'd been in love with since she was a teenager. Nick, it seemed, had eventually come around too.

Lincoln had been invited to each wedding as a courtesy due to his father's involvement with the Darlings, a consideration based on the legal work he'd done for them over the years. It's a world Lincoln remembered from his adolescence, but never thought to reenter; Fringe Division really did take up all of his time, and that was the way he liked it. But the invitation arrived on actual paper, a ridiculous expense for a ridiculous family, and the feel of it in Lincoln's hand proved to be an irresistible enticement. It wasn't like he had anything better to do with his weekend-Charlie had family obligations and Olivia was still acclimating to Fringe Division and didn't need him imposing on her free time. And unlike the other five weddings, this time he actually knew the groom.

Besides, it wasn't often he had the opportunity to take an all-expense-paid trip to Italy and stay in an honest to God mansion. The Darlings were flying all their guests in from around the world to the place where Karen and Nick had their teenaged love affair. Lincoln figured he might as well use some of his never-taken leave and go look at least a little of the world while it was still there to see.

He arrived on the day of the wedding. He'd barely stopped off at the guest villa (practically its own sovereign nation) to put on his monkey suit and begun wandering around the grounds when he heard the voice behind him.

"Hey, hey! Lincoln Lee, my real twin."

Lincoln sighed but it was impossible not to smile back at Jeremy Darling's infectiously cheerful presence. It was true, he and Jeremy looked just enough alike that people still did double-takes at him occasionally; keeping his hair short wasn't just a smart Fringe Division guideline, it also saved him from a world of mistaken-identity trouble. A *lot* of potential trouble, considering Jeremy's predilection for vice of any and every kind.

Juliet elbowed her twin brother in the side and grinned at him. "Lincoln, isn't this all so romantic? Nick and Karen had sex for the first time here when they were kids, and now they're getting married here, isn't that amazing? After all this time?"

"Amazing," Lincoln agreed, because it was always easier to agree with Juliet. Which was more than half the problem, but not his issue to deal with.

Jeremy poked his sister back. "Meanwhile, the eternal virgin here is saving it for her wedding night. Whenever that might be. Hey, Lincoln, you wanna take her off our hands? She's high maintenance but the compensation will make it worth your while."

Juliet shrieked and batted at Jeremy's head, trying to cover her blush and casting speculative glances at Lincoln at the same time. "Ugh, you're gross. I'm sorry he's so gross, Lincoln. Will you dance with me later at the reception?"

"It'd be my pleasure," Lincoln said because again: agreement was key.

Juliet giggled and fussed with her dress. "I have to go help Karen get ready. She's so excited, it's adorable. See you later!"

She ran off, still laughing, exactly the same as when Lincoln had seen her last, over five years ago. Money could freeze you in time as efficiently as Amber, he thought, and barely suppressed a shudder.

"Thought she'd never leave," Jeremy said, looking at him from under lowered eyelashes and oh, Lincoln remembered that look too. "Kind of stupid, man, we both live in New York and never saw each other all this time."

"Different worlds," Lincoln managed, glancing away. Which was true enough, but-

"You remember, though," Jeremy purred, moving closer. "What it was like, with us. Like, doubles, what d'they call that, doppelganger sex. Want that again. Never had anything like that with anyone else."

Lincoln hadn't either, obviously, but it hadn't really been about a narcissistic itch, at least in his case. Mostly it had been because Jeremy was sexy and fun and completely uninhibited, and Lincoln hadn't needed any more excuse than that. Still didn't, honestly. But being involved with Jeremy Darling also meant being involved with the rest of his family, and with the whole world when the media caught up with him as they always did. Then and now, Lincoln had career plans other than being Jeremy's boytoy.

"Jeremy. This...is a bad idea," he said, although Lincoln was honestly having trouble remembering why. Jeremy always did that to him, too. "I have- you know what I do, there's barely any time for-"

Jeremy scrunched up his face at the mention of real life. "Yeah, but you're not working *now,*" he said, as if vortexes were confined to New York and Lincoln's responsibilities didn't follow him everywhere. If the local Italian Fringe agency called an alert, he'd answer. "It's a party, man. Live a little. C'mon, come with me." He giggled. "And *come* with me."

Now that he was this close Lincoln realized that Jeremy was completely high, judging by his blown pupils. "We can't right now. The wedding-"

"Yeah, seen it. Five times." Jeremy closed the distance between them. "Dad's drunk, mom's weepy, rest of the fam is busy fluttering all over Karen and Nick, they won't notice." He leaned close and whispered in Lincoln's ear. "It'd actually be kinda cool if you deflowered Juliet. Past time and I know you'd make it good for her. But only if I get you first. And after."

It was just preposterous enough to break the spell. Lincoln laughed and gently pushed Jeremy away, keeping his tone light. "I haven't seen all those weddings. Like you said, it's a party, I want to see it all."

Jeremy pouted at him-an honest to God pout, lower lip thrust out like a child's. But "I want" was powerful language in Jeremy's world, the only words he really understood. "Okay, fine. After, though...you promised Juliet a dance. You have to promise me a kiss, at least. To be fair."

In the end it was impossible not to agree that it was, in fact, only fair. As they walked back to the party, Lincoln caught himself watching Jeremy's ass move in his exquisitely tailored pants and knew he'd only postponed the inevitable.

The wedding was, of course, a magnificent spectacle. Karen was radiant, even on her sixth trip down the aisle; Lincoln could almost believe she really meant this to be her last attempt at happily ever after. Nick George at the altar looked more stunned than anything, and Lincoln silently wished him luck. He remembered Nick too, both of them having been caught in the Darlings' orbit by their fathers' professional connections with the family. But Richard Lee had been more determined to keep the Darlings at a distance than "Dutch" George, and Lincoln had always been grateful for that. Nick had never escaped, becoming the family lawyer after his father's death, and now his entanglement in their affairs had become even more intimate.

After the ceremony they set up a receiving line, the Darling family unsurprisingly standing before all others. The family's patriarch Tripp Darling, already more than half drunk on his traditional Karen's-wedding-day bottle of tequila, greeted him effusively. "Lincoln, my boy! We all miss your father dreadfully."

Only the fact that Lincoln's father had insisted on a small, family-only funeral had prevented the Darlings from descending in an extravagant display of grief; big gestures were what they did best. They'd contented themselves with massive donations to Richard's pet charities, a far better offering in the long run. "Thank you, Tripp."

At Tripp's side, his wife Leticia beamed at him warmly. "We hear you've made a name for yourself, too. You're a genuine hero!" The affection was real, Lincoln knew. It was also true that for Tish Darling, out of sight was very literally out of mind, and she'd never given him a thought in all these years. Which, frankly, had probably been the only thing keeping her from scheming to marry him off to Juliet.

Or to Jeremy. The Darlings were nothing if not equal-opportunity, as demonstrated by the next man in line. Lincoln shook hands with eldest son Patrick, now a powerful senator, who was standing with his wife Carmelita at his side. "So you're Lincoln Lee," she said, her deep voice attesting to her biological gender. "Paddy told me about you while he was working on the Amber Victims' Legal Rights bill."

Lincoln nodded and smiled and let the crowd push him along. There was a space next to Patrick, a slight gap that was probably unintentional (or knowing Tripp, perhaps not) but stood to remind everyone of the missing brother. Brian Darling had been caught in the Madison Square Garden event, his body entombed in Amber along with nearly ten thousand others. In his least compassionate moments, Lincoln thought it couldn't have happened to a nicer guy. Brian had been a wretched, miserable excuse for a human being, and a worse priest. Lincoln had never met anyone more unsuited for his vocation than Brian and the priesthood, and couldn't help remembering Brian's acerbic, unsympathetic commentary about Amber victims: "Anyone too stupid to get out of the way deserves what they get." His fate was a stellar example of poetic justice, and if Lincoln was inclined to believe in a deity, a just punishment from the God that Brian had so eloquently disdained with his every action.

Of course it was Brian's status that had initiated Patrick's work on the bill, at the urging of his family. All the thousands who had been lost before him and since were incidental to Tripp Darling's overwhelming determination to protect the family at all costs. But whatever the cause, the family's charitable actions on behalf of their own more often than not ended up benefitting the people caught in their wake, and Lincoln wasn't inclined to argue over those results.

The twins were next: Juliet, giggly and unconcerned with anything but her own pleasure, unburdened by responsibilities; and Jeremy...giggly and unconcerned with anything but his own pleasure, unburdened by responsibilities. They glanced at each other and on a prearranged silent signal, both leaned forward to kiss his cheeks. "See you for that dance," Juliet whispered in his left ear, while Jeremy on his right murmured, "Can't wait to get my mouth on you again."

Lincoln barely managed to cover as he finally reached the bride and groom. Karen was euphoric, practically floating, as she greeted her guests. Of all the Darlings, she was the one Lincoln had actually seen most often, since she handled the family's charitable foundation that made regular donations toward Fringe Division's efforts to find better solutions for their world. Most of the equipment in the science labs had been purchased with Darling money. She was too exhilarated to talk and just beamed happily into his eyes as Lincoln offered his congratulations.

Nick George was still wearing a slightly dazed look, but he managed a few words, seeming pleased to see Lincoln and extending an invitation for them to catch up once things had settled down. "That'd be great," Lincoln told him, knowing it would never happen. Nick had fully entered the Darlings' circle now, and there was no room in their lives for socializing with a mere Fringe agent outside of this extraordinary event.

Lincoln nodded at the rest of the wedding party and escaped to find his table. He didn't know anyone here except the Darlings, but he hadn't really come to socialize anyway. He'd been thinking about renting a motorcycle and spending a few days driving around the countryside, maybe making his way to the old Roman landmarks that hadn't been quarantined. In the meantime there was a spectacular buffet set up, and there was no reason not to indulge.

The party really got started with a succession of toasts, eight-thousand-dollar bottles of champagne passed around like water, and there was no reason not to indulge there either. Vacation, Lincoln decided, had been a really good idea. Especially on someone else's tab.

He was eyeing the coffee decanter again-a more potent draw than the champagne for most of the guests-when Juliet appeared in front of him, looking expectant. "May I have this dance?" she asked, looking pleased at her own courtesy.

"Of course," Lincoln said, and took her hand.

Juliet pulled him onto the dance floor, the music thumping out at a good beat, but it was a trick; the band immediately segued into a slow song and Juliet melted against him, her arms winding around his neck. "I always liked you, Lincoln," she said into his chest. "I like you better than the guys who actually want to date me. They only want our money, and that's okay, but...nobody sees me for me." Juliet was silent for a moment before she said in a long breath, "But maybe them just wanting my money is okay because I'm afraid there's nothing else for them to see."

Lincoln knew from their younger days that Juliet was prone to dramatic gestures, but that sounded alarming. "Juliet-"

She raised her head and flashed him a bright smile, cutting him off just like her brother always did. "No, I promised I'd be good today, not do anything to mess up Karen's special day." She ducked her head again, hiding her eyes. "I did think about it, y'know." Her breathy giggle made the context clear. "But you look just like Jeremy so that'd be weird, wouldn't it be weird? And Jeremy wants to sleep with you again anyway." Juliet darted a glance at his face. "Are you going to?"

The conversation was giving him too much whiplash to even try to hedge. "I- probably."

"Good. I still wish there were two of you." Juliet leaned up to kiss his mouth and dashed off, leaving him in the middle of the dance floor.

As rare and tempting as the coffee was, it definitely wasn't going to be enough to cope with all the Darlings. Lincoln made his way over to the bar and ran into Tripp, who was holding court. "Lincoln! Let me introduce you around. Captain-it's Captain now, isn't it?-Captain Lincoln Lee, of New York Fringe Division. Richard's son," Tripp said, and that seemed to be more important to his entourage than anything else. Lincoln smiled and nodded and allowed his glass to be filled up with the really good stuff Tripp was drinking, not the swill passed around to the rest of the room.

Lincoln let himself relax into the atmosphere, the conversation of the rich and richer filling the air like an affluent haze. He was just starting to think about taking a walk to clear his head when Jeremy appeared on the other side of the room and crooked a finger to summon him. A dance for Juliet, a kiss for Jeremy, Lincoln remembered through the alcohol fog, and went to meet his fate.

He was pulled out of the hall and into a room filled with armless chairs, clearly being stored there for a later event. Jeremy pushed him down into a seat and immediately crawled onto his lap, straddling him, and wound his arms around Lincoln's neck just like Juliet had on the dance floor. "Okay, now."

Lincoln laughed, unable to stop himself. "Jeremy, you're high."

"Yeah, but not *impaired.*" He wriggled on Lincoln's lap, his hard-on demonstrating the point. "Quit stalling."

It'd been five years, but kissing Jeremy again brought all those memories right back. Jeremy kissed like he lived for it, all tongue and enthusiasm, and it was impossible not to get caught up in his passion. Even if it was only for a moment, or a night.

They broke for air and Jeremy grinned at him, secure in his victory. "Stay with me at the house for a couple of days."

"My stuff's at the villa," Lincoln started to protest, lamely, not sure why he was even bothering.

Jeremy scrunched up his face. "That place is a dump. My rooms are much nicer, I can get Clark to bring your bags over. Or maybe I should just keep you naked. I like that idea." His eyes went wide. "And I can make the ceiling a mirror, you know, with a hologram, so I can see you while you're fucking me and it'll look like I'm doing myself. Soooo hot."

Lincoln wound his fingers into Jeremy's long hair and tugged gently. "You are a ridiculous human being. You know that, right?"

"Sure." Jeremy deliberately moved his head so that his hair was pulled again, harder this time. "Unf. You like me anyway."

He did, that was the kicker. "Yeah. Listen, Jeremy, be serious for a second. Your sister-"

Jeremy rolled his eyes. "Juliet totally went all drama on you, didn't she. She always does when Karen gets married. Don't worry about her, she's not as innocent as she pretends. After the party she'll end up fooling around with a couple of her girlfriends, she just thinks that doesn't count."

"She- you people wouldn't know reality if it *bit* you." And any worry or misplaced guilt he'd felt about Juliet could safely be dismissed. "But yes, I'll stay with you anyway."

"Score," Jeremy murmured, and reached up to finger Lincoln's suit collar. "Ugh, what is this, sackcloth? Is that what people wear? Let me buy you something decent."

His suit was perfectly fine, but that wasn't the point. "I thought you didn't want me wearing any clothing?" Lincoln teased.

"Not for *now,* stupid. For, I dunno, events." Jeremy waved vaguely. He bit his lip and looked confused, and then a little bit upset. It was an unusual enough expression to really focus Lincoln's attention. "You do go out, right? Not just for- shit, Lincoln, you know why I never called *you*? Because I didn't want to find out you were dead, like, saving some orphans or puppies or something."

And that was the other reason Jeremy had been so easy to be with, and so hard to leave: his unexpected sweetness and genuine concern, surfacing at the most unpredictable times. Lincoln ran his hand over the back of Jeremy's neck, soothing. "Hey, I'm here. I'll make you a deal: we'll spend a day or two here, and then I had this idea about renting a bike..."

Lincoln watched with pleasure as Jeremy's face brightened and he started to embellish the plan, talking at his usual rapid-fire pace about buying some souped-up bikes and stopping at the family vineyards along the road. Jeremy had been right, in his strange occasional way: Lincoln wasn't working now, and most of his worries were half a world away. It was also true that he was long overdue for couple of days spent simply enjoying himself. He could afford a brief re-entanglement with the Darlings, or at least this particular one; Jeremy might be a hazard, but not actually more dangerous than Lincoln's day job.

Jeremy's world wasn't real, but it was still a hell of an entertaining place to visit.


Title from "Love Etc." by the Pet Shop Boys. P.S., I really want a Jeremy Darling vid to that song, brilliant and talented vidder-type people, okay?

There might be follow-ups on the AO3 version.