Disclaimer: All of the plot lines and characters from Twilight are Stephenie Meyer's.

Chapter 1:

Make Me Forget

Bella Swan was sitting on the porch of her shabby one story house on a chilly December night in Phoenix, Arizona. Declan James sat beside her and offered her a cigarette, both of them lighting up in the night air. Neither knew what time it was, only that it was dark enough to be either late at night or very early in the morning. Bella sighed and took a long drag; her neighborhood was not in the safest part of town, but they both knew she could defend herself easily and had not required the walk home from Declan. She felt bad for the boy; he'd been in love with her since middle school, and as much as she cared for him, it was more of a brotherly love than a romantic one. She had tried to make this clear to him on numerous occasions, but Declan was stubborn. He refused to believe that he couldn't made her feel the same way eventually.

However, having someone beside her did give her an excuse to put off facing her deadbeat mother Renee, who was sure to be either trashed or passed out at this hour. Bella had gotten herself into yet more trouble with the cops, this time for trespassing and "possession of illegal substances". She had gotten off with only a fine; Officer Michaels knew the kind of home life she and her friends came from and was one of the only cops decent enough to go easy on them for it. However, Bella knew that Renee would be much happier if her daughter was sent away, putting more food--and booze--on the table for her, rather than pay another fine, this time for 180 dollars. Inhaling one last time before stomping the cigarette butt with her heel, Bella turned to Declan to say goodbye. He finished his own cigarette and pulled her into an almost too-long hug.

"Bye," he breathed into her hair before pulling away, "Come by my place later if she's a mess."

"Thanks," she replied grimly, "I might have to take you up on that."

The moment Bella close the creaking door behind her, Renee appeared from around the corner of the hallway, whiskey still in hand.

"You!" she spat, stumbling towards Bella and grabbing her shirt in her fist, "You fucking little bitch! I work my ass off to feed you, to clothe you, to put a roof over your head, and how do you repay me? Huh? Answer me!"

"I'm sorry mom," said Bella monotonously, knowing better than to start a fight. Unfortunately, there was no deterring Renee.

"Sorry?" she repeated, getting close enough to breathe her stale drunken breath into Bella's face, "Sorry isn't good enough!"

Bella flinched as Renee wound her arm back to slap her. She used the momentum of the blow to push herself to the floor. It usually ended sooner if she admitted defeat early.

"You little cunt!" Renee screamed, kicking her daughter in the gut, "How am I gonna pay for this and take care of you?! I've only had one fucking income ever since you drove Phil away!"

That was the last straw for Bella. Against her better judgment, she looked up defiantly and retorted, "It's not my fault you weren't good enough in bed and he had to get his kicks from me. You're the one that drove him to it, and when you caught him, you're the one that threw him out. It was no one's fault but yours."

"You goddamn whore!" Renee screeched, a mad glint showing in her eyes, "Phil and I were happy! And you had to take that away from me. You're the one that seduced him. We'd be living in fucking Florida with his baseball team if it wasn't for you!"

"Please, mom," mocked Bella cruelly as she lifted herself from the floor. She knew her actions would be punished, but right now it felt so good to stand up for herself that she didn't care. "If I wanted Phil, I could've had him so much earlier. But he's a scumbag and only someone as desperate as you would actually go after him."

Renee could take no more. She grabbed Bella by the hair and slammed her into the wall, bashing her head on a picture frame of mother and daughter smiling repeatedly until she was bleeding form the lip. Her glass had fallen and shattered, and in a frenzy she picked up a jagged piece and started slashing wildly towards Bella.

"Get out of my house!" she screamed, "Get out! Now!"

"Fine!" replied Bella, walking towards her room with Declan's offer in mind, "But I'm not coming back!"

"Good," sneered Renee, "you are no longer welcome here. From now on, I don't have a daughter."

"What a coincidence," laughed Bella humorlessly, "I never had a mother."

Renee pursed her lips but didn't say anything in retaliation. "Pack your shit and go," she deadpanned.

It only took Bella about ten minutes to grab everything she needed. Whether this could be attributed to the anger boiling up in her veins or the fact that she didn't own many worldly possessions, she didn't know. She checked herself in the mirror. She had a swollen bleeding lip and a few marks and cuts that were sure to bruise. She covered up what she could with makeup and gave up on the rest.

Renee was watching TV dispassionately when Bella emerged from her former room. She though about saying "Have a nice life", but decided she really didn't care how the rest of her mother's life went. So instead, she walked out the door without a word, hoping it would be the last time she saw this dump.

It was about ten miles to Declan's apartment--he'd barely graduated high school last year but now had his own place from a job working contruction. Bella scrounged in her bag for quarters and boarded a bus heading in his direction.

She sat in the back, ignoring the usual stares from the men and the less usual stares from concerned onlookers, and leaned her head against the window. She wondered what would become of her now. Would Declan be able to get her a job working construction with him? She could handle that. Would she have to start hustling drugs again? Would things get so bad she'd have to sell her body? Living with Renee had never been a cakewalk, but at least she had been guaranteed food and a bed without having to do anything too desperate.

Not matter how unpleasant some of her options might be, she was glad to be rid of Renee. For the first time in her life, she felt liberated. She was free to do whatever she wanted, free to make something of herself.. free to screw up like her dear old mom.

Bella was so emerged in her thoughts that she almost missed her stop. After exiting the buss in a hurry, she soon found herself knocking on Declan's door, 331A.

"I thought I'd be seeing you," he greeted with a sad smile.

"Can I stay here? For longer than tonight, I mean?" asked Bella, getting straight to the point as she brushed past him and set down her bag, "I'm not an expensive roommate, I swear."

"Well, sure," replied Declan, "But why? What happened?"

"Renee threw me out," she answered, putting her hand up to stop any further inquiries, "I don't want to talk about it until I'm good and wasted."

Declan nodded. "Of course."

Two hours later they were dancing to some horrible music on Declan's even more horrible stereo, eventually turning it off and collapsing on the couch together.

"You're a good friend," Bella giggled out, grabbing his cheeks grandma-style. "Oh my god!" she exclaimed, jumping to her knees, "You can be my new mommy!"

Declan laughed and tackled her back down to the couch, ending up on top of her. His face suddenly turned serious. He pushed the stray hair out of her face and said, "Why did she kick you out?"

Bella's child-like grin disappeared as she whispered, "Phil."

Declan pulled them upright so she was sitting on his lap and hugged her to him. Bella's drunken waterworks soon gave way and she found herself clinging to him like a lifeline. He was always so unselfish, so caring.. it was times like these that she could almost make herself love him.

That's when she decided that she wanted him, needed him right now. She knew it would likely mean more to him than it did to her, but it's not like it didn't mean anything to her at all, right? Besides, sex wasn't that big of a deal. That's what she'd been telling herself since she lost her virginity at thirteen to Phil, anyway.

It wasn't the best logic in the world, but right now she didn't care. She turned her face into the shoulder she'd been crying on and pressed her lips to it lightly, trailing kisses along his body until she reached his neck and looked up into his eyes. They were full of hope, but at the same time, they looked wary.

"Bella..." he began. She silenced his lips with hers. It was a gentle kiss, her mouth moving slowly against his until she realized he wasn't responding. Then it became forceful, her tongue prying his lips open and skimming along his teeth. He broke away.

"Bella, you don't really want this," he said, torn.

"Yes, I do. I've been wanting this for a long time," she lied.

With that, all his resolve broke and he crashed his lips to hers, running his hand through her hair and kissing her passionately. She wrapped her legs around his waist as he stood up and walked to the bedroom, never breaking the kiss. He laid her on the bed and climbed on top of her, but Bella soon swung herself on top, grinding her hips against him seductively. He moaned and grabbed her chest, pulling her into another kiss as she took her shirt off. He unclasped her bra as she unzipped his pants, and when both were free of their respective clothing, he broke away for the second time.

"Are you sure?" he asked.

She nodded. "Make me forget," she breathed.

And he did.

Bella awoke the next morning in a tangled, naked mess of limbs. The right side of her face was plastered to her hair, and it was hard to tell which hurt worse--her lip or her head. The events of last night soon came crashing upon her. Careful not to wake her still-sleeping companion, she made her way to the kitchen riding waves of guilt. Bella grimaced. She'd acted like a child last night, employing everything in her arsenal to get her way with the vulnerable opponent.

Bella spooned Folgers into the coffee machine and filled the pot with water, wondering how best to handle the situation. Option one: she could break it to him gently. In all likelihood, this option would result in one of two things--she'd be kicked out for the second time in two days, or she'd stay, but feel awkward and guilty until she finally left of her own choosing. Option two: she could leave right now. Declan had been drinking enough the night before that she could be long gone before he woke. Bella didn't like this option. As horribly selfish as she'd been last night, she truly cared for Declan and her mind shied away from the thought of hurting him, which brought her to option 3: she could go through with what she'd started and stay with him. Of course, sex didn't normally result in this many consequences for Bella, but because of Declan's blaring crush on her and the fact that she didn't love him the same way, she'd steered clear of doing anything she knew would lead him on--until now. But then again, did she really know what love was anyway? It certainly wasn't what Renee or Phil had given to her. How could she possibly decided if she loved someone if she'd never been shown it at all? Had she been in love with him this whole time but had been too blind to see it?

She was on her third cup of black coffee when Declan finally woke up. She had to decide now. Which option was it going to be?

The moment Declan approached her, eyes full of apprehension and vulernability, she caved. She set her mug down and wrapped her arms around him. He breathed a sigh of happiness and relief, burying his head in her long hair.

"Morning," he said with a smile.

"Morning," she answered, leaning up to kiss him.

They remained entwined together for several minutes before Declan left to get ready for work, promising to ask about getting her a job.

After he left, she jumped in the shower. The hot water stung at her various cuts and bruises, but it felt good to cleanse herself. She spent extra time in front of the mirror until you could no longer tell she'd been beaten last night and now had a killer hangover, but was still soon without anything to do. It was 11--too early to call anyone. They'd either be sleeping off their own hangovers or still be in school. School was another thing she had to consider. She'd skipped today, but did she want to go back now that no one was forcing her to? Did she really need to? It wasn't likely that she'd pass her junior year anyway. Maybe if Declan got her the job, she'd quit.

She sighed and walked to the kitchen, deciding only to decide later. She grabbed the bread and made two peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. She polished it off with a glass of orange juice and returned to the pantry, deciding on the box of Oreos. She downed a row of them and completed her binge with a few spoonfuls of the peanut butter she'd left out.

Bella returned to the bathroom in an almost catatonic state. She kneeled beside the toilet and shoved her middle and ring fingers to the bottom of her throat, pumping mechanically until her stomach lurched. She relished in the makeshift high as her stomach was emptied over and over again. When her system had nothing left to purge, she stood up to an assaulting wave of black spots and dizziness. Feeling only infinitesimally better, but better all the same, she went back to bed until it was late enough to call someone.

A/N: I have the second and part of the third chapter already written. I don't expect a bunch of reviews for the first chapter, but I do have a tendency to get lazy and they'd give me a kick in the ass to get the rest typed up. ;)