A/n: Totally Kyle is probably the best and most successful thing I've
written on FF, so I decided to make a 'movie' of it. Now remember, try not
to diss Joey in reviews 'cause I luv him. *hugs* Also note that Tea(or
Anzu) is the villain in this fic, so beware! Mwahaha!
TOTALLY JOEY: THE MOVIE
[Scene opens to Joey in a field of pretty flowers and birds and very cheesy spring music in the background. Joey starts skipping around, smiling like an idiot]
"Teeheehee." he says. While skipping, he twirls...and ends up falling on his face. "Owww..."
[The spring music is suddenly cut off and replaced by horribly played electric guitar. Kyle comes surfing down riding a flying surfboard. He lands beside Joey and makes a peace sign]
"Dude, I rock." Kyle brags. Joey grumbles and picks himself up. Dusting himself off, he sees Kyle's surfboard and his eyes become stars.
"Pretty..."
"Dude, stop like, drooling on my like...surfboard."
[Joey wipes his mouth with his sleeve]
"Where'd you get it?" He asks.
"Like, on the interweb...net."
"Cool."
Kyle then points to a faraway tree.
"Dude, I lived there once."
"O.o Was it uncomfortable?"
"The only clothing I had was like, a sock."
"O_O Too much info, too much info!!" Joey yells, covering his ears.
"DUDE!!" Kyle then points to the sky. "THERE'S LIKE, A FLYING PIG IN THE AIR!!"
[Joey looks up then shakes his head]
"That's only a Patamon."
"FLYING PIG, I SAY!"
[Joey cowers]
"Yeesh, you need to take it easy, Kyle..." he mutters.
"MOMENTAI!" yells the Patamon. (Momentai means 'Take it easy')
"Hey! That's my word!" yells a nearby Terriermon.
[The Patamon lands]
"Nyah!"
"Grr..."
[The two digimon get in a cat fight while Joey and Kyle watch]
"Yay for senseless cartoon violence!" says Joey.
"Yay for...uh, dude...Oh yeah. Yay for like, Tea in spandex!" Kyle says.
[Joey's expression is now (O_.) He sweat drops]
"Err, right..." He says.
"Like, dude. Tea's hot." Kyle says with a blank look on his face.
[Kyle begins drooling and zones out]
"Kyle? Kyle!" Joey says, waves a hand in front of his face.
[Joey shrugs and throws Kyle into the cat fight and watches as the digimon tear him apart]
"Hey...Where's Cameraman?" he asks, remembering that the cameraman is not there.
[Suddenly, lightning strikes and the beautiful day becomes dark with black clouds and cliché evil villain music. '???' appears over Joey's head]
"Who's there?" he shouts.
[Evil laughter is heard. The laughter belongs to a very annoying...]
"TEA!?!?" Joey asks.
[More evil laughter]
"Yes, it is I, Tea! Mwahahaha!" She laughs crazily.
"Yeah, yeah. What d'you want?" Joey says in a bored tone.
"I am the one who has stolen your cameraman!"
"Thanks for tellin' me. Now I can get'm back." he says while smirking.
"Tsk, tsk. Stupid blond! You don't know where I live! AHAHAHA!"
[Joey turns to Kyle, who's hair is being ripped out by a couple of cute digimon]
"Then I'll ask him." Joey says, pointing to Kyle. "He's been to your house before. When you two went on a daaa~ate!"
[The sound of smacking is heard]
"Damn, you're right. CURSES!" she yells then laughs like a maniac again.
[Her voice dies out and the even more annoying cheery spring music is played once more. Joey walks over to Kyle. The digimon have finally stopped beating him up and now are dusting themselves off. Joey turns to the Terriermon]
"Is he still alive?" he asks.
"Dunno," replies the Terriermon.
[Terriermon gets a nearby stick and pokes Kyle]
"Hm. He's not doing anything." says the digimon.
[Terriermon pokes him harder and harder until the stick breaks. o.0 Terriermon raises an eyebrow]
"Yup. I think he's dead." says Terriermon.
"Crap! I need his help to save Cameraman!...I got an idea!" says Joey.
[A light bulb appears above his head, unlit. Joey blinks and flicks at the light bulb. It doesn't turn on. He growls then punches the light bulb, causing it to break]
"...Oops." he says sheepishly.
"...So what's your idea to wake him up?" asks the Terriermon.
"This."
[Joey takes a deep breath]
"KYLE LOOK! TEA IN TIGHT CLOTHING!"
[Terriermon blinks]
"That's a disturbing mental image, whoever this Tea person is."
[Kyle suddenly jumps up and looks around]
"DUDE, WHERE!?" he frantically asks.
"She just left." Joey answers boredly.
[Kyle falls on his knees]
"NOOOOOOOOOO!!!" he cries.
"Geez, you're so dramatic. You need to momentai." Terriermon says, rolling his eyes.
[Kyle sobs while everyone seems to have forgotten about the Patamon]
"Uh, Kyle?" Joey asks.
[Kyle becomes normal again very quickly]
"Like, yeah dude?"
"Where does Tea live?"
[Terriermon snorts]
"If she's wearing tight clothing and he," He points to Kyle. "Likes her, she must live in 'pervertland'."
[Joey starts laughing and laughing harder and harder until he falls on the floor laughing his ass off! ...Oi, talk about ROFLMAO. o.0]
"...It wasn't supposed to be that funny." Terriermon says.
[Joey finally stops laughing and gets up]
"Hehe."
"Like, dudes? Tea DOES live in Pervertland." Kyle says, picking his nose.
[Terriermon grimaces and Joey blinks]
"Ookay..." Joey says.
"But like, I forget where Pervertland is." Kyle says, now sticking his finger in his ear.
"I know where it is." says Terriermon. "I know a Pervertmon that lives there."
[Hooray! Terriermon saves the day]
"A...Pervertmon?" asks Joey.
"Yes. They are very perverted beings." responds Terriermon.
"Now I'M getting a disturbing mental image. _" replies Joey.
"Do you want me to take you to Pervertland?" asks Terriermon.
"Yeah. I don't wanna go, but we need to save Cameraman so that 'Totally Joey' will continue airing on TV and I finally get that pool full of cookies I want so much!" Joey says, putting his index finger in the air.
"What a motivation. Well, let's get going. And you!" Terriermon points to Kyle. "You seriously need to momentai!"
"Dude, I already got my Kodak moment with Tea in her really hot like, clothing..." Kyle replies.
[Terriermon and Joey's expression: O_O]
TOTALLY JOEY: THE MOVIE
[Scene opens to Joey in a field of pretty flowers and birds and very cheesy spring music in the background. Joey starts skipping around, smiling like an idiot]
"Teeheehee." he says. While skipping, he twirls...and ends up falling on his face. "Owww..."
[The spring music is suddenly cut off and replaced by horribly played electric guitar. Kyle comes surfing down riding a flying surfboard. He lands beside Joey and makes a peace sign]
"Dude, I rock." Kyle brags. Joey grumbles and picks himself up. Dusting himself off, he sees Kyle's surfboard and his eyes become stars.
"Pretty..."
"Dude, stop like, drooling on my like...surfboard."
[Joey wipes his mouth with his sleeve]
"Where'd you get it?" He asks.
"Like, on the interweb...net."
"Cool."
Kyle then points to a faraway tree.
"Dude, I lived there once."
"O.o Was it uncomfortable?"
"The only clothing I had was like, a sock."
"O_O Too much info, too much info!!" Joey yells, covering his ears.
"DUDE!!" Kyle then points to the sky. "THERE'S LIKE, A FLYING PIG IN THE AIR!!"
[Joey looks up then shakes his head]
"That's only a Patamon."
"FLYING PIG, I SAY!"
[Joey cowers]
"Yeesh, you need to take it easy, Kyle..." he mutters.
"MOMENTAI!" yells the Patamon. (Momentai means 'Take it easy')
"Hey! That's my word!" yells a nearby Terriermon.
[The Patamon lands]
"Nyah!"
"Grr..."
[The two digimon get in a cat fight while Joey and Kyle watch]
"Yay for senseless cartoon violence!" says Joey.
"Yay for...uh, dude...Oh yeah. Yay for like, Tea in spandex!" Kyle says.
[Joey's expression is now (O_.) He sweat drops]
"Err, right..." He says.
"Like, dude. Tea's hot." Kyle says with a blank look on his face.
[Kyle begins drooling and zones out]
"Kyle? Kyle!" Joey says, waves a hand in front of his face.
[Joey shrugs and throws Kyle into the cat fight and watches as the digimon tear him apart]
"Hey...Where's Cameraman?" he asks, remembering that the cameraman is not there.
[Suddenly, lightning strikes and the beautiful day becomes dark with black clouds and cliché evil villain music. '???' appears over Joey's head]
"Who's there?" he shouts.
[Evil laughter is heard. The laughter belongs to a very annoying...]
"TEA!?!?" Joey asks.
[More evil laughter]
"Yes, it is I, Tea! Mwahahaha!" She laughs crazily.
"Yeah, yeah. What d'you want?" Joey says in a bored tone.
"I am the one who has stolen your cameraman!"
"Thanks for tellin' me. Now I can get'm back." he says while smirking.
"Tsk, tsk. Stupid blond! You don't know where I live! AHAHAHA!"
[Joey turns to Kyle, who's hair is being ripped out by a couple of cute digimon]
"Then I'll ask him." Joey says, pointing to Kyle. "He's been to your house before. When you two went on a daaa~ate!"
[The sound of smacking is heard]
"Damn, you're right. CURSES!" she yells then laughs like a maniac again.
[Her voice dies out and the even more annoying cheery spring music is played once more. Joey walks over to Kyle. The digimon have finally stopped beating him up and now are dusting themselves off. Joey turns to the Terriermon]
"Is he still alive?" he asks.
"Dunno," replies the Terriermon.
[Terriermon gets a nearby stick and pokes Kyle]
"Hm. He's not doing anything." says the digimon.
[Terriermon pokes him harder and harder until the stick breaks. o.0 Terriermon raises an eyebrow]
"Yup. I think he's dead." says Terriermon.
"Crap! I need his help to save Cameraman!...I got an idea!" says Joey.
[A light bulb appears above his head, unlit. Joey blinks and flicks at the light bulb. It doesn't turn on. He growls then punches the light bulb, causing it to break]
"...Oops." he says sheepishly.
"...So what's your idea to wake him up?" asks the Terriermon.
"This."
[Joey takes a deep breath]
"KYLE LOOK! TEA IN TIGHT CLOTHING!"
[Terriermon blinks]
"That's a disturbing mental image, whoever this Tea person is."
[Kyle suddenly jumps up and looks around]
"DUDE, WHERE!?" he frantically asks.
"She just left." Joey answers boredly.
[Kyle falls on his knees]
"NOOOOOOOOOO!!!" he cries.
"Geez, you're so dramatic. You need to momentai." Terriermon says, rolling his eyes.
[Kyle sobs while everyone seems to have forgotten about the Patamon]
"Uh, Kyle?" Joey asks.
[Kyle becomes normal again very quickly]
"Like, yeah dude?"
"Where does Tea live?"
[Terriermon snorts]
"If she's wearing tight clothing and he," He points to Kyle. "Likes her, she must live in 'pervertland'."
[Joey starts laughing and laughing harder and harder until he falls on the floor laughing his ass off! ...Oi, talk about ROFLMAO. o.0]
"...It wasn't supposed to be that funny." Terriermon says.
[Joey finally stops laughing and gets up]
"Hehe."
"Like, dudes? Tea DOES live in Pervertland." Kyle says, picking his nose.
[Terriermon grimaces and Joey blinks]
"Ookay..." Joey says.
"But like, I forget where Pervertland is." Kyle says, now sticking his finger in his ear.
"I know where it is." says Terriermon. "I know a Pervertmon that lives there."
[Hooray! Terriermon saves the day]
"A...Pervertmon?" asks Joey.
"Yes. They are very perverted beings." responds Terriermon.
"Now I'M getting a disturbing mental image. _" replies Joey.
"Do you want me to take you to Pervertland?" asks Terriermon.
"Yeah. I don't wanna go, but we need to save Cameraman so that 'Totally Joey' will continue airing on TV and I finally get that pool full of cookies I want so much!" Joey says, putting his index finger in the air.
"What a motivation. Well, let's get going. And you!" Terriermon points to Kyle. "You seriously need to momentai!"
"Dude, I already got my Kodak moment with Tea in her really hot like, clothing..." Kyle replies.
[Terriermon and Joey's expression: O_O]