Emma was still missing and Killian was out of himself. He couldn't believe that she has disappeared a moment after finally confessing her feelings for him. He was moping and venting at everything and everyone who crossed his path.
MaryMargaret and David were busy with the new prince and trying to find a way to reach Emma before she succumbed to evil.

Henry,being Henry, was trying to be optimist and find a way back for his mother. He spended his time playing with Roland, helping his mother with everything he could and before going to bed he searched his book looking for answers.

And they, they were trying to find a way to each other. Zelena was still locked down in the asylum, still pregnant. She was the constant reminder for Robin of his own stupidity, his own misplaced sense of honor. He's gone away for months to save the life of his wife, convinced himself to try and try and try to feel again what he felt once for her only to discover that it was a low trick from her sister's truelove. What a twisted sense of humor. Regina has accepeted him again like nothing has changed, but the proof was the growing stomach of her half sister whom she visited every week. He refused to come near her again, he couldn't trust himself with her. He knew that, given the chance and a little push, he might kill her, baby or not.

And here they were, on Regina's sofa. The boys were asleep upstairs after a long day at the park playing and running like brothers while their parents were looking for a way to take Emma back. They were becoming a family, slowly and gradually finding their rythm in this little town after everything.

Regina had her head on his shoulder, he was playing with the end of her hair trying to reassure himself that she was really here in his arms. Or maybe he had to reassure himself that he was back in hers. The tv was on, a low soundtrack playing in the familyroom, but both of them were lost in their own minds. Until Regina decided that she had enough. She looked at him for a moment before litfing up her head to kiss him. He welcomed the touch, a nice distraction from his thoughts. Her lips pliant and soft, her hair smelling of cinnamon and apple, her breath mingling with his. He kissed back with equal tenderness, his hand lifting to her cheek to feel her smooth skin before settling in her neck. After a moment or two she straddled his lap never stopping their kiss, playing with his short hair and raking her nails on his scalp. He moaned in her mounth and that's when he lost it. He abruptly pushed her away standing up.

"I... Would you like a cup of tea, darling?" he asked, breathing still laboured.

Regina looked startled before frowning at him. "I would really like to continue our little activity, I was rather enjoying myself." She said with a little smile. A smile that he didn't reciprocate.

"So, that's a no. Well I'm making some" he said before leaving the room for the kitchen. Regina didn't move, staring at his back trying to understand what was happening. One moment he was his usual self, flirty and gentleman and happy and the next he was distant, sad. She couldn't understand what was really going in his head. They were fine, weren't they? They kissed and talked and laughed and walked hand in hand but they were never intimate. They still hadn't... and that bothered her. Has the time apart made him think who he really was dating? Has Marion/Zelena changed him that much? Maybe he didn't find her attractive anymore. Maybe her sister opened him to new...adventures? Thinking about that made her want to go to her and choke the life out of her but she couldn't do it because her boyfriend got her knocked up. Fire raced through her veins at the thought. He wasn't guilty, he thought he was bedding his wife and they agreed to move on, to forget their time together. She knew she was being immature about that but she couldn't shake the feeling that he preferred her long lost wife turned half sister in law to her. She had had countless lovers in her life, using their lust to have what she was looking for. Maybe she wasn't that good. She was good at sex but who knows about making love? She wasn't that experienced. She's been in love only with Daniel before Robin and they were far too young to engage in certain activities, not to mention the vigil eyes her mother kept on her.

But two weeks after their return in Storybrook, they have never... The more she thought about it, the more she felt herself go angry at him so she joined him in the kitchen. He had his hands on the counter, his head down looking at the floor breathing hard, she could see from where she standed.

"What is it, Robin?" she asked none too gently.

He startled at her voice, turning to look at her. "What do you mean? I'm making tea", he aswered looking innocent.

"No, you're avoiding me... us" she said in her firm voice.

"Regina" he begun "I was thirsty and in need of some caffeine" he turned his back to her again.

She lost it. She approached him, turning him to her with a hand on his shoulder. "Stop lying to me! Stop it!" she almost yelled. "We were kissing and you pushed me away! Is it me? Am I not good enough anymore? Was she better?" She asked with tears in her eyes. Frustration and anger taking over.

"What?" he said with a disgusted face.

"Was she better than me? Has she made you feel better than when you were with me? Do you miss her love trick? Because I can give you the key of her cell and you can go to her, you can go out of this house forever if you really want her back!" she said raising her voice and not caring about the boys upstairs anymore.

Robin looked at her shocked. His eyes big and mouth open to say something but no sound come out so Regina took that as a yes and she continued in a sad whisper "I know, I know I'm the evil queen and I am a bad person for you. You deserve someone better than me, I always said to you. But you made me fall in love with you and I can see that you've changed your mind about us. I can't believe that I lost you to my sister. She tricked you, she lied to you, she killed your wife. As I would have done if Emma wasn't playing hero in the Enchanted Forest! You've changed, you're distant and sad and..." she was hypeventilating, looking and feeling like a little girl but she couldn't stop. She couldn't breath and she couldn't think clearly anymore.

"Regina, Regina" she heard him say "Regina, breath. Calm down and Breath slowly" he said, moving his hand up and down her back. She closed her eyes, breathing through her nose readying herself for what she knew would be his answer. He was leaving her, like everybody else. Like Henry did before going to Boston looking for his real mother. God, that still hurt. But she calmed her breathing and looked up at him. He had tears running on his cheeks, eyes red and lips trembling. So that was it.

"Regina" he repeated with a broken voice without saying anything more.

"Stop saying my name!" she said through her tears.

"Regina..." he was looking at her with such sorrow and pain, his heart aching, his mind burning. He couldn't, he just couldn't.

"You haven't touch me since you're back, we kiss and we hug but something is missing. You are missing." she accused him.

He bowed his head, ashamed and sad that she was thinking like this. She had all wrong in her head but that is his fault. Again. She was suffering for his mistakes and he couldn't bear that. He had to explain, but how?

"Has she bewiched you in the bed? Was she good?" she insisted continuing her ramblings speech about him and her sister but he didn't listen anymore. He was lost in the memories of NY and of him and who he thought was her lost wife, of the one night where he tried to prove to himself and to Marion that they could go back to eachother, loving eachother. One fucking night and his life was destroyed.

He felt himself move and scatter the teapot from the stove, burning his hand but not caring about it. "STOP!" he said forcefully "STOP TALKING!"

Regina has never seen him lose control. He was like another person, a caged animal. His voice was different, his eyes cloud by anger and something else she couldn't put her hand on. His back was stiff and he was cradling his hand near his chest. She approached him, not scared because she knew that he couldn't ever lay a hand on her, no matter the circumstances.

"Robin, let me see your hand." she said to him but he didn't move, he just continued breathing. "Robin" she repeated "I need to see your hand, you've burned yourself" she made one step in his direction and he flinched. She stopped in her tracks not knowing what to do.

"Please, don't touch me" he whipered. "Please my lo... Please Regina, stay away from me" It was as someone had punched her. He dind't want to be near her, so why was he living under her roof?

Lost in her own mind she hadn't seen the tears that were now running free on his face. She just looked at him trying to find her answers but he was closing off. So, she turned towards the leaving room.

"Wait" she heard him saying. So she stopped and waited. "Please" That was it. She had to see him and she saw him. He looked older, battered than she ever saw him. So she waited for him. She waited while he breathed and breathed and breathed.

"It's not you. It's me."

"Robin, that's the most lame thing you could say before leaving me!" She said with sarcasm that he couldn't really comprehend.

"Please...wait" he said brokenly. " I just need..."

"What? What do you need?" she asked forcefully.

"It's... It's hard to explain" he said not looking at her.

"well, try Robin... because I can't go on like this!" She was tearing up, she knew but she didn't care. Her soulmate was driving away from her and she couldn't be calm or rational.

He took one last long breath and found her eyes. " I cannot... I cannot touch you"

She looked puzzled. "I'm sorry... I don't think I understand"

He shook his head, like he was trying to order his thoughts. "I... whenever we are close, whenever you kiss me... I can't... I do not deserve you"

"Robin.. what the hell are you..."

He interrupted her "Don't you see me? I am a thief, I... I am a mess, I don't feel..." he coudn't go on. He couldn't explain to her what he was feeling. The anguish, and the guilt and everything else.

"You don't feel what? You don't feel the same for me?" She found herself say with her Evil Queen voice and that startled him.

"What? How can you... "

"How can I know?" she continued " You hadn't touch me one single time, you always find a way to avoid intimacy, you don't even have called me "my love" anymore! Last time was at Granny's and I was so happy to have you back in my life and that meant everything to me"

"Regina..."

"See? It's always Regina, or darling... I feel like I was with the Dark One!" she said smiling despite herself.

"No... that's not... After everything I did not think..." he was babbling, how could he make her understand?But he had to try, looking in her eyes he could see her walls building up again and he couldn't allow that. "When I was with her... I... always thought about you. You where always in my mind. While walking in the street, while shopping, while cleaning the house... while seeing her " he said with hate " play with Roland... I wanted you"

"You wanted me? That's why now she's carrying your child?" She said, she was so tired of this.

He visibly flinched at that. "No! I had... I had to prove that I could move on, that I could forget you... for Roland, he had his mother back and I could not destroy his happiness but... but he felt that something was wrong, he told me and he told me he missed you and asked me when we could come home... to you" he said with pleading eyes. " And I so wanted... I wanted to come back home to you... But now that I am, after everything, after my stupid mistake... Now how can I even think of touching you when I am dirt? I have betrayed you. I can not allow myself to touch you without thinking of her, of what she has done to me and to us. She tricked me... That was the only one time I...we... I couldn't lie with her another one. I felt bad because I loved you! And now that I have you back in my arms I can not touch you because I do not deserve you. You are so beatiful and kind and understanding. And I am just a man, a dirty man who has lost the right to touch your skin, to feel your skin. I do not deserve you... I am dirt, so dirt"

Regina was crying. She thought he was fine but he has been raped. Nothing more, nothing less. He has been violated by her own sister posing as his dead wife. She abused him, tricked him in impregnating her and he was suffering, not telling anyone how he was feeling about all this. She avoided the topic and who could he talk to if not her? How selfish she was.

"Robin" she begun approching him "Listen to me. You're the most noble heart I have ever met. I told you to be with your wife. I couldn't take your happy ending from you twice. You've been played by my sister and you feel guilty?" she laughed " I have to feel guilty, you're suffering because you've lost your wife again and you've been... abused by crazy half sister. I would do everything to take your pain and make you forget but you have to trust me when I say that I love you and it's me who dont' deserve you. You did the right thing leaving me for your wife, that's why I love you. But now " he still looked so sad "now you're back and she's here and she cant' win. We can't let her win. We have to stay together if you want, and love eachother fully because we want it. We'll face whatever is coming towards us together. I love you, Robin. Please."

He couldn't believe his ears. She was absolving him of his sins. She will to have to take care of his mistakes for the rest of her life. THe little boy or girl won't have any fault in this, will be innocent. Just like her. And she didn't deserve the reminder of who he is. A dirty man.

"Regina, I betrayed you. How can you...? I can not touch you"

"Robin... please, listen to me. You don't have any fault. I don't give you any fault. I want you. I want you in my life, in Henry's life because you're a role model. You're an honest man, a true man. Someone you can always rely on and that's what Henry and I need. I need you." SHe said passionately. He didn't say anything to she took a step and then another and she was circling his waist with her arms, tucking her head under his chin waiting for him to place his own arms around her. After a couple of minutes here they were. Safe and warm around her body, clinging like his life depended on it while he whispered "sorry" and "forgive me" and "I love you" and "I don't deserve you" in her ear.

"Maybe... maybe not" she said "but I still want you and I will for the rest of my life. No pressure now. I will give you all the time in the world, we don't have to jump in the bed right now" He loved that she could joke on this. "But promise me to talk to me, confide in me for everything. Talk to me Robin. Please."

He was blessed. That's the only thing registered in his mind. After everything he put her through she wanted to be with him. "I don't know how to shake this feeling, how I can feel clean again next to you, my love"

Regina thought fot a moment before saying "How about a shower? Together?"