This is supposed to happen at the ending of 3x15 episode. Before I start you need to know that during her time with Amanda, Alex wasn't tortured or pumped full of drugs, you will see later what happened and that Amanda did care about Alex.
i don't own neither the show nor its character
What if Alex knew something about Amanda that none else did? What if Amanda cared about Alex and knew a secret of hers that none else did, neither Nikita? How these secrets and this strange connection between them are going to affect the team? Will Nikita understand Alex attitude or she is going to push her closer to Amanda?
"it looks like this is a crisis averted" said Ryan to the two women standing in front of him with a relief tone. "it was agood choice Nikita" he added. "wasn't exactly my idea" Nikita applied. " Percy…." Ryan completed her thought. "he was concerned about protecting division from outside forces that he completely missed the real threat. The one from within. Now hearing you guys arguing last night it reminded me of that conversation. Division can survive a lot but not a war between the two of you" he said and left the room closing the door behind him so that the two girls can discuss about their damaged relationship.
"Ryan's wrong. This was never about you and me" Alex whispered.
Nikita turned to face her best friend and her anger was shown on her face. "then what was it about? You have been fighting me so hard! Tell me did you get you wanted?" said with pain.
"I wanted you to listen" Alex replied. "to open your eyes to the mistakes we have been making"
"And who open your eyes Alex? Was that something that Amanda did for you?"
Alex scoffed and replied to her mentor "Because why else would I disagree with you? It can't be possibly be that a valid point of view. Amanda must have done something" "someone did something" nikita said softly. "you are right Nikita someone did something. You did something when you started to accept kill missions again. You did something when you started turn into a new Amanda. What is next Nikita? Cancellations?" Alex replied honestly and stared at Nikita's eyes. Nikita was standing motionless and looked back to her friend being in pain. It hurts her too much to see Alex accused her for turning into Amanda. She couldn't say anything. She felt powerless.
"Nikita I love you too much to let you turn into something that you hate. You shot me once in order to protect me. If I can't help you by being your friend, then maybe I must try an other way. If destroying our relationship makes you see cleaner then this is what I have to do. It hurts me more than you could imagine, Nikita." Alex said in a caring way and left a tear to fell down to her cheek. Nikita didn't have the opportunity to reply because the door opened and Birkoff entered the room.
" Amanda wants to chat" he announced and look to his friends. "girls are you alright" asked with anxiety. "yes" Nikita applied and stared at Alex face."We are fine. Let's chat with Amanda". The three of them exited the room and headed to ops.
"Put her through" Ryan ordered and looked to Alex and Nikita worrying about their unexpressed faces. " hi division. How are you? Alex nice to see your face again" Amanda said from the video. " Amanda what do you want this time" Nikita said with hate in her voice.
"To be honest I just wanted to have a little chat with Alex, if that is alright with you" Amanda ironically answered. " Have you missed me already Amanda?" Alex asked and looked into Amanda's eyes. " Alex. Have you told them?" Amanda asked. Alex didn't respond. " I will take your silence for no" Amanda said. "Does Nikita know your secret, Alex or you didn't trust her enough to share it with her?" Nikita stared at Alex with a worried look. Everyone were staring at Alex. What was Alex's secret that she didn't confide to anyone? Why Amanda knew about it?