Chapter 1 Amy's POV

It's been a year since I got on that plane to follow my dream. I made it through my first year of college and man does it feel good to have a break. Today I am going home for the first time in four months to see my son. I miss him more than anything, and my biggest regret was leaving him behind. However, I knew that Ricky would take care of him until I got settled here in New York. Ricky wanted to wait to send John until right before his 5th birthday when he would be starting kindergarten. I was able to find a nice two bedroom apartment, big enough for John and I within a reasonable price. I am greeting by my mom and dad upon my arrival, and I run forward to greet them. My dad scopes me up into his arms and I feel like a kid again wrapped up in his arms. Next, comes my mom, who I take the time to inhale her scent, not realizing how much I missed it while I was away.

"How was your flight, honey?" my dad asks as he grabs my luggage.

"Good. I'm just excited to be home. Where's John?"

"With Ricky at the house with Ashley. He was napping and we didn't want to wake him," my mom informs. I get a little uncomfortable at the mention of Ricky and Ashley alone with John. Last time that happened, they kissed, and I don't know how I feel about that possibly happening again.

"Oh, okay. Well, let's get going, I really wanna see my baby." They both nod in understanding and we head off to my parents house. I'm so very nervous. Not so much about seeing John because I talked to him everyday over Skype, but about seeing Ricky. We haven't really talked about anything unless it was concerning John and I must admit that I really miss him. Setting him free was the hardest, yet most selfless thing I've ever done. I loved him with everything, but he didn't want the things that I wanted. He didn't want the white picket fence, or the wedding, or the happily ever after. I believe he loved me, and I carry that everywhere the fact that I was loved by one Ricky Underwood. But he didn't love me enough to want forever because he didn't believe in it. He didn't believe that we could make forever, and I get it. Just because I didn't like it, doesn't mean I don't get it. Time flew by and we are finally in front of the house. Dad grabs my bags and heads in the house, while I just sit there completely lost in thought. Suddenly, I feel my mom take my shaking hand in hers. When did that happen?

"I know you're nervous Amy, but John is excited to see you. You have the whole summer to spend with him and then he will be with you in a few months time after you go back to New York. You are not a bad mom, for making a tough decision. Besides, John has a dad who loves him, and who would do anything for him and you. Don't worry for much sweetie because everything is gonna be just fine," she smiles at me, squeezing my hand in comfort.

"Thanks mom," I return her smile. We both exit the car at the same time, and head towards the front door. I reach out to touch the handle when the door flies open, revealing my younger sister standing there with my pride and joy in her arms.

"Dad said you were still in the car for whatever reason, so I thought I'd bring John to you," she says.

"Nice to see you to Ash. Hey John!" I exclaim reaching out for him. "Mommy miss you so much baby boy!" He leaps into my arms and I hold him close revealing in the feel of him back in my arms.

"Mommy!"

"Yes, baby, mommy's home," I whisper in his hair before pampering his face with kisses. I feel the tears running down my face, but at this point, I could care less. It feels so incredibly good to actually feel and see him in person compared to a screen. After the much needed love fest, I walk into the house I grew up in to see that everything is exactly the same and I couldn't be happier. It feels good to walk into a familiar place and get that old familiar sense of belonging. I place John down to run along and play so that I could get settled in my old room. Just as I'm shedding off my sweater, I hear a knock on the door. I turn around just to come face to face with the one person I love the most besides my son.

"Ricky," I breathe out. "Hey."

"Hi, Amy. I heard you were back and decided to stick around a little longer. I hope that's okay," he smiles that knee weakening smile at me.

"Beyond okay. H-h-how are things? Are they g-good?" I stammer out, cursing myself at how stupid I sound.

"Things are good. School's good, John's good, everything is good. How about you? How's life in New York?"

"Things are going okay. I miss John more than I originally thought I would which was a whole lot. But I think I did the right thing leaving him here until I was settled in. I really appreciate you for everything you did and is doing regarding our son," I say really meaning it.

"I would do anything for that beautiful boy. Well, uhm, let me get out of your hair. I know you want to spend time with John. Just call me when you need a break or two," he says turning around to leave.

"Nothing has changed Ricky. You can see him anytime you want. Just because I'm here, doesn't mean I'll ever keep him from you," I inform him.

"That means a lot Amy, thank you."

"You're welcome," I respond. We just stand there awkwardly, not knowing what to say or do. That is until he steps forward and pulls me into his strong arms.

"It's great to see you Amy," and I could just turn into a puddle of feelings. I hug him back, taking in the feeling of his body pressed up against mine, the way he smells, the way his muscles contract against my frame. I take it all in because who knows when I will feel this again.

"You to Ricky, you to."