A/N: Characters not mine. Also, "If Heaven" is Andy Griggs'.

If Heaven

If heaven was an hour, it would be twilight
When the fireflies start their dancin' on the lawn
And supper's on the stove, and mama's laughin'
And everybody's working day is done

If heaven was a town, it would be my town
Oh - on a summer day in 1985
And everything I wanted was out there waitin'
And everyone I loved was still alive

Chorus:
Don't cry a tear for me now, baby
There comes a time we all must say goodbye
And if that's what heaven's made of
You know I, I ain't afraid to die

If heaven was a pie, it would be cherry
So cool and sweet, and heavy on the tongue
And just one bite would satisfy your hunger
And there'd always be enough for everyone

If heaven was a train, it sure would be a fast one
That could take this weary traveler 'round the bend
If heaven was a tear, it'd be my last one
And you'd be in my arms again

Chorus:
Don't cry a tear for me now, baby
There comes a time we all must say goodbye
And if that's what heaven's made of
You know I, I ain't afraid to die


"John," he called out through the dark house. His hand on his gun, he checked every room on the first floor before going up to the second floor. He checked the room immediately to his left and finding it empty, continued to his right and down the hallway. He peered into the first room he came to and in the moonlight saw the window open an inch or two on the bottom. Hand still on his gun, he called, "John."

He opened the window as wide as it would go and stuck his head out. The dark form of his partner could be seen, one leg bent, the other stretched out and his back against the side of the house. "Hey, man. Whaddaya doin' up here?"

No answer. Not even a glance his way.

Fin backed up a bit and looked at the opening before him. "Figures," he muttered and proceeded to crawl out onto the roof. "Only your skinny ass could fit through this," he grumbled. Heights not being his favorite thing, he sat down and inched his way closer to his partner.

"Do you think there's a heaven?" John asked before Fin could say anything.

Looking him over, Fin was satisfied to see that John was merely sitting there. Bringing his own legs up, he draped his arms over his knees and looked out across the street. "People gotta go somewhere when they die."

"What do you think it looks like?"

"I don't know. S'pose it's different for everyone. You know, what you really want to do or have in life."

John was quiet for a moment. "I think he's in heaven."

"We don't know that."

Both men were silent and Fin glanced at his partner again.

"John"- he started, but was cut off.

"I'm going to have a house. Maybe like this one. And I'll sit on the roof, like this and I'll look at the stars. Maybe I'll pick some stars from the sky, maybe I'll leave them for everyone else to enjoy. I'll walk the Milky Way and find out what's on the other end. I'll apologize to my father and I'll hug my mother and tell her she was right, I should have married a Jewish girl. I'll visit the people I let down and apologize for never getting them justice. The town I live in will be like this one and there will be miles of woods and I'll take walks and I'll have a dog for company. And if there's a God... I'll have a chat with him. Tell him what's what."

Fin looked at him. "John, we can still find him alive. It's not certain he's dead."

"Do you think there are angels in heaven?"

"I think you need to come inside with me."

"I'd like to have wings and be an angel."

"John. C'mon, man."

John didn't say anything.

"C'mon, partner. Time to go home."

And finally, John looked at him. "No, it's not. Fin, you don't get it. There are so many things that we're never going to do. And if there's no heaven we'll never get to do them. We'll just... die." He looked at the roof between his legs. "We'll just die."

Fin's gaze lowered until he was looking at the roof beneath them as well. All was quiet for a moment and not even a passing car stirred the men.

Then John asked, "What does it look like for you?"

"I don't know. Never thought about it."

"Everyone has an idea."

He didn't say anything for a moment. "A little house. Not too far from the city, but far enough. I'd find my partner, the one I told you about. Tell her I'm sorry, that that bullet was meant for me, she shouldn't have done it. Tell her I was supposed to die before she did." He let his head bang back against the house. "Damn it, John, why do you have to make life difficult?"

John was quiet.

"Hey, man, you know I don't mean that."

"No, no, it's fine." He got up. "Until tomorrow, partner." He threw a mock slaute and crawled back inside via the window, leaving Fin to sit alone on the roof, scanning the skies for heaven.