Happy Families
Chapter One
Triangles, Squares & Dodecahedrons

"Guess what, Roxas?"

Roxas grunted in response, tipping his spoon over in mid-air and watching the milk drip slowly back into his bowl. The blond hated guessing games.

Come to think of it, the blond hated a hell of a lot of other things as well. The red-head that had initiated the aforementioned guessing game was pretty high on that list along with warm milk, bent spoons, school uniforms, missing eyeliner and that hazy early-morning time somewhere between six and seven a.m.

It was just too bad for Roxas that every single one of those things were present in that breakfast scene.

Maybe if Axel suddenly dropped dead into Roxas' bowl of cornflakes and M&Ms he could forgive the other minor annoyances, but no. Sadly, the red head was still very much alive and kicking.

Always has to foil my plans… Damn Axel, Roxas thought darkly.

"Come on, Roxie," Axel continued, not deterred in the slightest by Roxas' caveman-like grunting. "You've gotta guess… You've gotta go… Hmn… Roxas, ask me if Kairi was the one who stole your eyeliner! That's a guess!"

Roxas looked up from his bowl of breakfast cereals and chocolate-coated candies, blue eyes narrowed.

"Axel, how do you know about my eyeliner?"

"Um… Well…"

"Axel, did you steal my eyeliner?"

"Uh… Thing about that is… Yeah, s'like this …"

"Axel, you have three seconds."

"Roxasssss, I thought we were friends," Axel whimpered, bottom lip wobbling slightly. He looked exactly like Naminé did (albeit a little taller, skinner, older and male….r) whenever she caught one of the younger kids drawing in her sketchbook or posting her crayons, one by one, into the video player.

"Then you're obviously delusional. Three…"

"Roxas, how could you be so cruel! I was gonna give it back, I swear!" the teenager pleaded, newly-lined green eyes widening. The sudden realisation that the boy had also used Roxas' precious make-up to doodle twin triangles underneath each eye only enraged the blond more.

"Yeah, you were gonna give it back, I'm sure. After you used it all up! What's it gonna be tomorrow? Squares? Dodecahedrons?" Roxas breathed in sharply. "You're on two now."

"But Roxie-"

"I hate that name."

"Even more than pineapple head?"

"Three."

"Roxasss-"

"I think I'm gonna have to pummel your face in now," the boy replied coolly, rolling the sleeves of his school shirt up above his elbows.

Axel backed away in alarm, noting from Roxas' expression and his clenched teeth that was it serious ass-kicking time.

"Roxas! Wait!" Axel cried, backing away into the china cabinet and holding his hands above his face, making a cross with his two index fingers. He'd been on the receiving of one of Roxas' hissy fits before and broken bones hurt a lot. "Don't hurt me!"

"I'm not a vampire and I sure as hell ain't putting my lips anywhere near your neck. I'm going to put my fingers around it first and then I'm going to twist and twist until it snaps and then I'm going to break your arm in seven places and wrestle my eyeliner from your dead corpse."

"Uh… There's one problem with that plan, actually," Axel laughed nervously. "I sorta… Uh… Traded it with Kairi this morning for a pop tart."

"You did what?!"

"It was a good pop tart!"

Roxas' eyes narrowed into little more than slits.

"Goodbye, Axel. I'm sorry it had to end this way."

And then he pounced.

Axel winced as his head smacked back into the damned china cabinet with an ominous crack, the lapful of cute blond boy hitting and kicking and biting and scratching at every square inch of his skin, intent on bringing about his doom.

"No! Roxas! You can't!" the red-head cried as a fist met his face and a trainer'd foot slammed onto his own de-shoed and de-socked one.

Broken toes hurt a lot.

Axel breathed in, lungs seeming to be filled with pins and needles as he shouted, in broken defeat, "Stop! Think of our children!"

Roxas paused, eyeing the red-head with murderous intent, fingers still lost in his mass of crimson spikes. "What?"

"Heheh…" Axel laughed nervously, looking Roxas full-on in the eyes. "Surprise?"

a.n: yes, steal roxas' eyeliner & die. poor axel. sooo this fic is dedicated to the wonderful lamatikah who wanted me to write an akuroku (not necessarily this fic though xD) & i hope you stick around for chapter two – that's when everything is explained, like why roxas eats m&ms with his cornflakes ;D there is a reason.

skitts xxx