"Hello? Anyone home?"
Raguna turned over in her straw bed at the sound of knocking, only half awake.
"Come back later," she murmured, too low to be heard outside. A moment later the knock came again.
"Helloooo...? Raguna? Are you in there?"
She groaned.
"I said, come back later!" she called, turning her back to the door.
"What are you talking about, it's already morning!" came the muffled reply.
Raguna opened one reluctant eye to see through the window; it was still pitch black out.
"It's dark, and therefore night; return during a sane hour, if you don't mind," she said irritably.
"It's six in the morning, and you have chores to do!" Mist's voice said.
Ugh, why?! All I wanted was water, how did I end up a farmer?!
"C'mon, Raguna! Rise and shine!"
Right. It's all because of this girl, she remembered sluggishly.
She sighed and pushed herself up, wincing slightly at the dull muscle ache that never seemed to go away these days. From dawn to dusk, her entire day was spent plowing, weeding, and sowing, and her fields were so derelict that getting the trash and stones out of it was slow, painful work. Already three weeks of spring had gone by, but she was only about one-third through the field for the next season.
"Fine, I'm coming," she sighed, sitting up and reaching for her boots. They were thick and heavy, the toes plated with iron, and they were caked in mud. She set them next to her on the floor and began to get dressed.
A few minutes later she trudged through the front door. Mist was waiting for her, smiling naively as always.
"Morning, I brought you a gift!" she said cheerily. She held out several pouches of seeds.
"More turnips?"
"Wow, how'd you know?!"
"Lucky guess," Raguna said dully. She stifled a yawn.
"You don't seem so energetic..." Mist said, leaning forward to get a closer look at her face. Raguna gulped slightly; she was a bit too close...
"I'm just tired," she stammered, avoiding Mist's eye. Why does she have to be so damn pretty?! This is how I got conned into working here in the first place, dammit!
"Oh, well, nothing like working yourself into the dirt to cheer you up!"
And there's the weird, right on schedule.
"Right," Raguna said, resigning herself. She'd left her hoe lying against the wall the day before; she picked it up and threw it over her shoulder. "Well, I'm going to work, then."
"Have a nice day!"
All I wanna do is just take a day off, she complained as she plowed a new furrow, sweat beading on her forehead. Everyone else gets to go for a drink in the evening! Everyone else goes exploring! But noooo, I can't even have one day to relax because if I don't work myself to the bone I'll go broke and starve.
She had been fishing a lot for her meals lately; the fields wouldn't yield a thing until later in the season, but if she ignored them she'd be in huge trouble financially. There weren't a whole lot of ways to make money in Kardia; it was a pretty small town, and farming was the most important and most lucrative job available, assuming one worked hard and lived to work.
"Hey, Raguna, how's it going?"
She looked up to see Emmett, the town barkeep, leaning against the fence. He was an older man, heavyset and always in a good mood. Despite their vast difference in age, he and Raguna got along very well; she frequented the bar on her rare days off.
"Hey Emmett," she said, wiping her brow. "It's going... well whatever this is," she said miserably, gesturing toward the mess of sticks and rocks everywhere.
"Yeesh, every time I drop by, I swear it actually looks worse. You got your work cut out for you, Rags."
"Every time you call me that, I can feel myself get a little poorer," Raguna complained.
"Nah, you're just dirt poor to begin with. That's why you're Rags."
"Ha. Funny."
"So, what ya been planting?"
"Mostly turnips," she sighed.
"Mist?"
"Mist."
"Is it because you're being nice or-?"
"Well it started with being nice; I mean, she saved my life and all, the least I could do was plant a few turnips for her, y'know?" she said, leaning on her hoe. "But she just keeps bringing them, and you know what? I am broke as hell and free seeds are free, Emmett. FREE."
"You're gonna be eating turnips for the next ten years at this rate," Emmett chuckled. "You need to learn to say no, kiddo."
"I want to say no, but then she looks at me with those big blue eyes and gives me that innocent smile and..."
"Pfft, you're worse than Lukas. C'mon Rags, get it together."
"I can't! When it comes to Mist, I am weak," she lamented.
"You don't have to tell me that, I can see it clearly enough for myself," he guffawed.
"How did I get into this mess? I'm so tired, Emmett," she sighed. "Yesterday Felicity invited me to go shopping with her, and I couldn't go because, guess what? Fieldwork. I've been meaning to start exploring the caves around town, and to work on my swordsmanship with Mei, but again, I can't. Because fieldwork. And as you know, I haven't even been able to go to the tavern in ages and I need a drink so badly. But I can't, because FIELDWORK. I don't know how old I am exactly, but I'm definitely too young to be slaving away my youth."
"Hang in there kiddo. It's tough starting out on your own, but it'll get better, I promise. You have to put in all your time and effort if you want to become a productive member of society."
"No! I refuse!" Raguna said suddenly, throwing down her hoe. "I don't want to become a productive member of society, I just want to be able to eat normally and relax, goddammit! Nobody even needs my bloody vegetables, Camus and the others already have perfectly good farms!"
Emmett grinned. "Sorry, you wanna eat, you gotta work."
"I don't mind work, but this is a mountain of work! Mist let this field go to waste for so long that just getting it back to decent shape is killing me! And a farm this size is too big for me to run alone anyway."
"So get some help."
She blinked. "There's... help?! THERE'S HELP AND YOU NEVER TOLD ME?!"
"Whoa whoa, wait, lemme explain," Emmett said, waving at her to calm down. "So you know them monsters in the caves outside of town?"
"No," she said pointedly. "Because field-"
"Right," he cut off hastily. "Well anyway, there are monsters outside of town. If you go out and wrangle yourself a few, they'll help you with the farm."
"What, just like that?!"
"Pretty much. There's some kind of weird enchantment on the town that makes most monsters compulsive workers. Of course, the more they like you, the better a job they'll do, and there's always exceptions. But long story short, if you got a place to keep em and the food to feed em, they'll run this place nice and smooth for you."
"Emmett, I'm going to kill you. Why the hell didn't you tell me this three weeks ago?! I could have been planting fodder instead of these bloody turnips!"
"Hey, look on the bright side, at least Mist will be happy, right?"
Raguna pressed a hand to her face.
"Mist owns my ass... doesn't she?"
"Mist owns your ass."
Comrade Falienzo was minding his own business, as usual. His day began with a nice breakfast, followed by a nice long nap and a bath in the river. Afterward, he always went for a walk, in order to dry out his precious wool coat. Keeping oneself clean and fluffy was a Wooly's pride and joy, after all, and Comrade Falienzo was determined to grow out a better coat than Comrade Berinde this year. If he did, he was sure to impress Comrade Meretta and finally win her favor.
He was daydreaming about her as he walked that day, so he wasn't paying attention to his surroundings. He didn't notice the magic circle on the ground, or the weird silence in the forest around him. He plodded on as usual, and when he crossed the boundary, there was a flash of light and the forest disappeared. When he opened his eyes again, he was in a dank cave.
"Baa?! Baa?"
Translation: What the hell?! Where am I?
He turned around frantically, looking for a tree or familiar landmark, but all he found was a strange machine, whirring away ominously.
"Baa?!"
Translation: Oh crap, did I get summoned?!
Sometimes, monsters randomly went missing from the Forest of Beginnings. They usually showed up a few days later, saying that they'd been summoned to the human world by magic. The general consensus, after generations of trial and error, was that if one was summoned, the best course of action was to attack the first human they saw and let themselves be beaten to a pulp. Human tools and weapons almost always had Retornen magic, which spirited one back home in an instant. Unfortunately, humans were too stupid to understand monsters, so getting them to use their tools by civilized means was nearly impossible. This meant that a good beating was usually in order for the poor homesick monster, though there was no rule that said one didn't get to fight back, just out of spite.
"Baa..."
Translation: I guess I'd better find a human to attack...
He found a likely looking tunnel and started to follow it, hoping he'd make it back home in time for his afternoon nap.
Alright, sword? Check. Rope? Check. Escape Tome? Check. Okay Raguna, let's catch yourself some monsters!
Raguna whistled to herself as she made her way into the cave, her sword hoisted carelessly over her shoulder. She didn't expect to find any particularly tough monsters; she'd gotten advice on where to go from Russell, and she'd decided to go for a few woolies. They were weak monsters that were fairly dexterous and generally made for good helpers.
"Plus, they're adorable," she'd said when she saw the illustration in the book Russell lent her.
"A fair point," he'd agreed.
Her goal was to catch two or three of them. She figured that a couple of woolies were about as much as she could handle with her current supplies and income, but once her fields started producing, she could always return for more.
No more menial chores! No more slaving away! I can go on dates and sleep in, I can get drinks whenever I want! Long live woolies!
It didn't take long for her to find a likely monster generator. The ugly machine made a ghastly noise, but all she had to do was sit and wait for a monster to be generated, and hope it was a wooly.
Comrade Falienzo quickly found a promising target. For some reason, the stupid human was hiding behind a rock, staring at a machine just like the one he'd seen when he was summoned. He couldn't understand what it was doing, and after trying to puzzle it out for a minute, he decided to just get the inevitable beating over with.
"Baa!"
Translation: Hey, idiot! I'm over here!
He lowered his head and charged with all his might. He struck the human right in the back.
"Ow!" it cried. Comrade Falienzo jumped back for another attack, giving the human time to draw its weapon.
He charged again, but this time the human managed to hit him. The weapon had an edge, but it didn't cut Comrade Falienzo. It struck like a blunt object, and it hurt. Nevertheless, the magic wouldn't work until he was knocked out, so he tried to scratch the human next. The blows kept coming.
"Baa! Baa?!"
Translation: Fuck, dammit, that HURTS! What idiot designed Retornen magic to be so damned inefficient?!
He was getting irritated and quickly forgetting that his goal was to be beaten. He just wanted to land another blow on the stupid human and make it hurt too, and that was when he made his mistake.
He hadn't seen the rope in the human's other hand, he was too focused on the weapon. But when he dodged it in order to smack the human as hard as he could, the rope was suddenly lashed around him, binding his arms to his side.
"Baa?!"
Translation: WHAT THE HELL?!
"Yes! I caught it!" the human said.
"Baa?!"
Translation: C-caught?!
"Hmm, let's see here..." the human pulled out another object, a slab of some sort that opened up to reveal several thin sheets.
"Baa..."
Translation: I don't like the look of that...
"Okay, so to activate the escape magic, I need your name and a destination. We've got the destination, so I guess all I need is to give you a name," the human muttered. It tapped its cheek thoughtfully, staring at Comrade Falienzo. "Oh, I know, I'll name you Slump!"
"Baa?! Baaa! Baaa, baa!"
Translation: What the fuck kind of name is Slump?! I already have a name, a perfectly noble name, you stupid human! Comrade Falienzo, repeat after me: Com-rade Fa-li-en-zo!
"Great, you like it too!"
"Baa!"
Translation: I do not, unhand me this instant!
"Okay, Slump, from now on, you'll be living with me! I'm Raguna, okay?" The human patted his head condescendingly, and Comrade Falienzo wished he could move enough to bite the damned creature. The human muttered something unintelligible and for the second time that day, Comrade Falienzo found himself being teleported somewhere he absolutely did not care to be.
"Baaaaa!"
Translation: Goddamn it, no one told me humans also kidnapped us!
He supposed it may have slipped someone's mind.
Notes:
COMRADE FALIENZO, STAY STRONG. YOUR STRUGGLES HAVE ONLY JUST BEGUN.