A/N: I've been thinking about writing a Severitus fanfic for years, but never got around to it seeing as I had yet to finish my initial foray into fanfiction. Having finally accomplished that feat, I decided, why the heck not? Might as well give it a go and maybe it won't take me 12 years to finish. No promises though. That being said, here it is. Perhaps it is more of a Sevitus. I don't know. Whatever. Either way, it's a Harry is Snape's son story. Good luck to you all.

Summary: AU after OOTP. Harry returns to Hogwarts for his sixth year to deal with a Death Eater Draco, strange and confusing interactions with Snape, and a new DADA professor who isn't as wonderful as everyone thinks.

Warnings: Potential (I'm sort of writing this as I go, so you just don't know, do you?) descriptive violence, language, abuse, and non-con/rape.

*This chapter does contain rape. It's not graphic or descriptive, but it is there. Please do not read if it bothers you.

Disturbances

Chapter 1

October 1979

Lily struggled in vain against the Death Eaters holding her arms. The fear and anger she felt was slowly overtaken by regret. Why hadn't she told James? She didn't plan on following any Death Eaters when she left the house this morning. She only meant to take a quick visit to Knockturn Alley to collect some more questionable ingredients for the Order's potions supply. They weren't dark items necessarily, but they wouldn't be found at a normal apothecary.

The Death Eater on her left wrenched her shoulder back, causing her to briefly stop struggling and suck in a deep breath, pain burning in her arm. Macnair, she guessed, due to his overall size and the slight chuckle he let out at her expense. She had put on a particularly strong glamour before arriving at Knockturn Alley, and thankfully it held. They had no idea who she was, only that a small brown-haired woman with squinty eyes and an upturned nose had been following Dolohov through several shops. Unfortunately, he hadn't been alone, and Lily was grabbed from behind as a silencing charm hit her in the back and a hood was thrown over her head.

Now she was here, feeling foolish for her actions. She should have sent a message to James as soon as she saw Dolohov. Now they wouldn't even know she was missing for hours at least. James was meeting with Moody today to discuss their next course of action. He'd be gone for quite some time, possibly through the night. And here she was wandless and feeling increasingly vulnerable.

The hood was whipped off her head and Lily squinted in the dim light of the room. Her heart sunk as she saw the figure in front of her. Voldemort. A new wave of terror hit her. She didn't think she would be important enough to bring before the Dark Lord. She figured she'd deal with a couple of his followers and that gave her hope of escape. But now that hope was fading fast.

Voldemort's lip was pulled up in a snarl, annoyance clear on his face, "Why did you think I would care about a worthless woman following you about?"

The Death Eater on her right spoke up, voice quaking, "My Lord, we thought she might be part of the Or-"

"Do you think I have time for this!?"

The man fell silent, clenching his jaw.

"I do not care about insignificant members of the Order! I need Dumbledore! Moody! Someone of value." He spit out the last word, voice falling dangerously low. "Why haven't you brought them to me? It makes me question your usefulness."

"My Lord-"

"Crucio."

The Death Eater who had spoken fell to the ground writhing and screaming. Voldemort turned to his side, waving his hand to summon someone forward. Lily realized there were several more Death Eaters in the shadows of the dim room. Her heart stopped as she saw Severus Snape step into the light. She tried to keep her face blank, but tears threatened her vision. It had been so long and guilt clawed at her throat. Severus looked worse than she remembered, skin somehow paler, emphasizing dark circles under his eyes. She noticed he stood tall though, showing no fear in front of Voldemort.

"Severus," Voldemort all but purred, "I feel I should reward you for your loyalty. Your skills have shown to be most important to our cause."

Severus' face appeared unchanged, but Lily recognized the slight twitch beneath the mask. She breathed out. She thought abandoning him would force him to see what was right, but she had been wrong. She chose James and foolishly thought it had to be a choice at all. She wished she had realized that at the time.

"My Lord," Severus spoke, "the cause itself is reward enough. But I graciously accept any gift you bestow upon me. It honors me greatly."

"Of course Severus." Voldemort fixed his gaze upon Lily and she avoided his eyes, afraid he might see something in them. Recognize she was not as insignificant as he assumed. "I give you this woman. Use her, then dispose of her. The side chamber is available for you."

Snape stood unmoving, looking at the small woman in front of him. Lily met his eyes, observing the internal struggle warring behind them.

"Of course, Severus, I could offer her to Macnair instead, if you do not think this reward worthy," Voldemort said. His tone was light but his stare was cold.

"Forgive me, My Lord. This is a most pleasing gift."

Snape strode to Lily and took her arm, forcefully pulling her away from Macnair and shoving her towards a door on her right.

"Also Severus, Lucius will be watching to ensure you enjoy yourself." With that Voldemort turned and left. Snape paused briefly then continued forward, dragging Lily through the door with him, Lucius close at their heels.

Snape had discovered rather quickly his mistake in joining the ranks of the Dark Lord. Perhaps he had known all along he was heading in the wrong direction, but ever since he lost his best and only friend, he didn't much care. He wanted to have purpose. He wanted others to look at him with respect. And he wanted to make Potter and Black pay. It didn't take long for him to realize he was the one paying instead.

Now here he was, with this "gift" from the Dark Lord, having to take yet another action that would shame him for the rest of his life. He looked at the woman, standing defiantly in front of him. She was rather nondescript, but something in her eyes seemed vaguely familiar.

Lucius sidled up beside him, smirking. "Well, Severus, if you aren't going to get on with it, perhaps I should take advantage of this opportunity." He stepped up to the woman, still smiling, and put his hand up to her breast. She immediately swung her palm up towards his nose. Unfortunately, Lucius anticipated the action, grabbing her wrist before it could connect. He twisted her arm around behind her back with a sharp jerk. A small cry escaped her mouth. "Now that isn't the way to treat a gentleman," he sneered, then proceeded to slap her across the face, knocking her to the ground.

"Enough." Snape placed his hand on Lucius' shoulder and pulled him away. "The Dark Lord did not give her to you."

Lucius frowned and walked back to stand next to the door. "Then by all means, enjoy her Severus. Or I'll let our Lord know you didn't approve of his gift." He leaned against the wall, arms crossed and wand hanging loosely in hand.

Snape grit his teeth. The temptation to curse Lucius was strong, but he couldn't. He had been going through his options as soon as Voldemort summoned him forward. His heart sank when Lucius had been sent along with him, destroying any means of deception. Lucius was a pompous arse, but he was by no means weak or foolish. He trusted no one and never let his guard down.

He picked the woman off the ground, pushing her against the wall opposite Lucius and attempting to block her from view. She tensed then began struggling against Snape. Snape muttered a charm and her entire body relaxed, arms falling to her sides. He saw the fear well up in her eyes and wondered if she could see the guilt in his.

It didn't take long and Snape despised every second. The woman's eyes had gone blank. He felt disgust for himself and hatred for the Dark Lord fill his chest. He murmured the counter for the charm, giving the woman control of her limbs again, but she just slumped against the wall. He held her up by the arms, turning to Lucius.

"I will take her to my place to dispose of her."

Lucius frowned, "Why not be done with it now Severus?" One side of his mouth twitched up into a smirk. "Or have you fallen in love? I'm sure it's been quite some time for you after all."

Snape sneered, "Though I wouldn't expect your small mind to fully comprehend, there are certain dark potions that require ingredients such as blood from a living witch or wizard, among other parts of the body. If you would like to inform the Dark Lord that you kept me from brewing potions that will aid in his cause, then by all means, do what you want with her."

Lucius' frown returned. "I will let the Dark Lord know to expect such potions in the near future," he spat, annoyance written across his face, then left, slamming the door behind him.

Snape adjusted his hold on the woman, turning on the spot with a pop.

Lily felt hollow. She knew it wasn't her fault, but she couldn't help wishing she'd been smarter in Knockturn Alley. She wasn't angry with Severus. In fact, she was having trouble feeling very much at all.

Severus had apparated them into a dingy alley. It looked to be somewhere near the outskirts of muggle London.

"Are you alright?" The tone was stiff. Lily looked up at him. She wasn't in the least bit okay, but she knew it easily could have been Lucius or worse. And she wouldn't be standing here alive.

"I'll survive."

Snape nodded, glancing around. "Are you able to apparate?"

Lily nodded back. Snape took his hands from her arms and stepped back, about to leave. "Wait," Lily found herself saying. In that moment she desperately wanted to reveal herself. Take off the glamour and try to bring Severus back to their side. To her side.

Snape shot her a confused look. "I-," she stuttered. "I don't blame you. I know you saved my life."

Snape stared at her as she stood, biting her lip. After what seemed like several minutes, he finally spoke. "You should blame me." Then he turned on the spot and vanished.

Exactly one month later, Lily found herself again in Knockturn Alley with yet another glamour, buying more semi-illegal potions ingredients. This time she kept her head low and made her visit quick.

She returned home to an empty house at Godric's Hollow. James had just left on a mission the previous night and would be gone for the week if all went according to plan. Which it rarely did.

Lily sighed as she began to set up the cauldron in their kitchen. She and James had been trying for a baby for several months. Their attempts had decreased significantly as time went on. The war continued to take it's toll and when one of them wasn't away for an extended period of time, they were both too tired to do anything but sleep. But Lily was pregnant anyway. And too her overwhelming dismay, it wasn't James' son. She knew with the timing, there was a chance, but she performed the paternity charms anyway, hoping her instincts were wrong. They never were.

She had a choice to make, knowing she wouldn't be the only one affected by the consequences. Her child would probably feel them more so than herself. She never told anyone what happened to her that day. Not even James. She knew she should, but the thought brought only shame. She should tell him now, especially since this wasn't his child. But what if he recognized Severus in the features? Would he be able to love the child of his enemy, of a man who had forced himself on his wife? She forgave Severus, but James would not have that ability.

She considered talking to Dumbledore, but he was heading up a war. She didn't want to add more worries to his list. Perhaps when it was all over, if it ever ended, she would confide in him.

So Lily had made her decision, realizing it might be a terrible one. She knew many charms that could change appearance, and in combination with certain potions, could have a more permanent effect. It had taken several days to find the right potion, and thankfully she was quite adept at both subjects because it was a very difficult process. The brewing lasted the whole day, the sun setting as she finished the words of the final charm over the clockwise stir of the potion. She was done. She poured it into a bottle, holding up the murky teal concoction before her. Suddenly she wasn't sure. Then she thought of Voldemort and his claim to every Death Eater child.

She downed the potion in one swallow.

A/N: There you have it. Yet again, I've only partially planned this story. So who knows where it will end up. Lucky for you, I've already written the next chapter. Onward!