A/N Good morning, Planet Earth! It is now 12:15 AM EDT, and... crap, is it really? I have church tomorrow! *types really fast* I got the idea for this little bitty mini ficcy as I was hoeing corn in my Grandma's garden. Way cool, right! ;D
Disclaimer: *draws sword* Onward, men! We're storming the castle! We shall steal those rights, or die trying! Yaaaaaaaaah!
~3~1~4~
"Once upon a time on a small farm in Northampton, Massachusetts, there were seven farmers. Farmer Leonardo, Farmer Raphael, Farmer Donatello, Farmer Michelangelo (He was the best farmer.), Farmer Master Splinter, Farmer Casey, and Farmer April. Everyday, the evil Farmer April forced Farmers Donatello and Michelangelo to work in her garden. She ordered them to plant the onions and weed the corn, yadda yadda yadda, and when they didn't do what they were told, she would whip them with her deadly cat o' nine tails!"
"Uh, Mikey, being a little overdramatic, there?" Donatello gripped the hoe's wooden handle with familiar skill and swung the hoe in a perfect arc over his head, embedding it into the soft dirt.
"Maybe a little." Mikey shot a glance at the red head, who reclined in the porch swing, sipping lemonade.
The red head in question tilted her head ever so slightly. She lifted her voice so that it would carry over the many rows of growing vegetation. "I don't see you working, Michelangelo!"
Mikey huffed, begrudgingly returning his attention to the little abominations that were choking the life out of the baby tomato plants. He peered over at Donny. "See? Eeeeeevil." He waggled his fingers for effect.
The purple-clad turtle smirked. He bent down and plucked a weed that was too close to the plant to risk hoeing; even though the odds were highly against him missing the weed and hitting the plant, April didn't leave a sacrificed tomato plant unpunished. "We did kinda deserve garden duty, Mikey."
Mikey held up a finger. "Not the way I see it!"
"Not the way you see it? Mikey, we trashed the living room!"
That led to a pause. "Ok, maybe we deserved a row of corn hoeing for that-"
"We also blew up the tv."
"Another couple rows, at best."
"Set the kitchen on fire..."
"All the tomatoes..."
"Collapsed the wall separating April and Casey's rooms..."
Visible cringe. "Ugh. Ok, digging up every potato for that one..." He shuddered when the memory of April's Rage reared its head.
Donatello was standing with his arms crossed over the tip of his hoe's handle. "After all those punishments have been dealt out, how much garden is left, Mikey?"
"..." Mikey spun in a circle, surveying the garden with an ever increasing wince. He suddenly brightened and jerked his arm out, pointing. "The green beans!"
Donny nodded gravely. "The five green bean plants. Well done, Mikey. You've discovered where the injustice lies. We should NOT have to weed the green beans!" By now, Donny was wearing an unsuppressed grin.
Mikey rolled his eyes. "Oh, ha ha." He slammed the blade of his hoe down, not bothering to look where he was slicing.
"Mikey..." The humor gone, Donatello sounded panicked; he spoke in hushed, frantic tones. "Don't let April-!"
"Michelangelo! That's gonna cost you a row of cabbage planting!"
He couldn't look. He did anyway. His eyes dropped and fell upon the once-growing tomato plant, now rent in two by his blade. "Shell." He whispered. Shooting a glance at his captor, he dropped to his knees and grabbed the severed half of the plant. "What do ya mean, April?" Mikey yelled across the garden to her. He shoved the end of the plant into the ground and patted the soft dirt around it, holding it into place. "It's fine!"
"Nice try, Mikey! One row of cabbage!"
The youngest turtle, still kneeling in the dirt, curled his dirtied fingers into claws and threw his head back. "Whyyyyy!"
Donny squatted down next to him. "Because boredom leads to destruction. Destruction leads to punishment. Punishment leads to suffering!" Grinning like a madman, Donny stood and grabbed Mikey's hand, pulling him to his feet.
"Thanks a LOT, Master."
"Anytime!"
~3~1~4~
A/N: Thanks for reading!