Title: No TV Anymore
Author: X_fairy (Diana_Lesky2@yahoo.com)
Disclaimer: The X-files belong to CC and Mulder and Scully belong to each other, not to me! No infringement intended!
Rating: PG
Category: HR
Spoilers: Red Museum, a bit of Quagmire
Archive: Anywhere, with my name and addy, but please let me know!
Feedback: Please! I LOVE e-mail!
Summary: Scully has two quite different presents for Mulder's birthday...
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No TV Anymore
by X_fairy
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Entering the office on Tuesday, October 13th, Mulder was surprised to find a huge box sitting on his desk. It was wrapped in bright green paper, and someone had written 'HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MULDER!' across the front in 5-inch letters. He started to peel of the paper, curious as to who might send him a present nearly big enough to contain a small car. He tore of the green layer of paper, only to find a red one beneath it, a yellow one beneath that, and a few more until he had reached the cardboard box underneath. It was taped shut thoroughly. He frowned. "Who the heck wrapped this thing up?"
He didn't realize that he had spoken aloud until he heard the reply to his question.
"That was me." Scully's voice. Of course. Who else would go to such length only to annoy him. A moment later she slipped in and closed the door behind herself. Meanwhile he had gotten out his letter opener and was slicing through the tape. He opened the box only to reveal -- tons of crumbled newspaper!
"What kind of weird joke is this, Scully?"
"Just wait and see."
With an exasperated sigh he started to throw the paper out, all over the place. After about two whole Sunday papers, he found something else -- yet another box. With an absolutely -- and intentionally -- bored expression, he began to cut open this second box, wondering how long his partner would be able to keep her secret up.
Nearly half an hour, three more boxes and about a week's newspapers later they stood knee-deep in crumbled paper, and on the desk was a fairly smaller box, about the right size for a TV set. Mulder still wore his bored face, although he was grinning inwardly. Scully was cringing and squirming, unable to decide what was easier to bear, her own curiosity or missing the sight of his face when he saw the present.
He decided to release her. "Tell me already, what is it?"
Instantly, she had her cool back. "Now that you're this far, you can go on and see for yourself."
He groaned and cut through the last layers of tape to open the box.
He was taken aback. It *was* a TV set. "A TV? You know that I do own a TV, Scully!"
She grinned. "Well, I couldn't risk you going bankrupt on electricity bills 'cause you have your TV running all night. It has a timer." He wanted to interrupt, but she beat him to it, "Don't worry, I asked the Gunmen for some financial support. I'm no millionaire either."
Finally he had an opportunity to speak. He smiled warmly, he should have known that she wouldn't give him a present without some afterthought. "Thanks, Scully. Oh, well, I think I should thank the guys as well -- you coming with me?"
She sighed, but agreed.
They were being awaited. Frohike stood at the door, grinning broadly, what wouldn't have looked quite that ridiculous, had he not had a fat black stain on his front teeth.
Scully lightly hit his chest with a fist. "Get it off, Frohike."
He ignored her, for once, and grinned on. "What are you gonna do with your old TV, Mulder? I bet I can find some use for it..."
"...and get my video collection along with it, forget it, Frohike," Mulder shot back. He went in and immediately found himself confronted with the next surprise, a virtual birthday cake. This was too much. "I'm touched. What are you gonna do next, sing 'Happy Birthday'?" he said sarcastically.
Langly looked too disappointed to be real. "Who told you? It was supposed to be a surprise!"
Mulder started to grin, "Sorry, guys, but you should forget the idea of a TV career, you're too obvious."
"Don't blame us, it was all her idea!" They pointed to Scully accusingly.
She shrugged. "Sorry to offend you, Mulder, but I needed some time to have the real thing prepared..."
That got his attention. "The real thing?" He looked at the Gunmen, but this time they succeeded in not letting anything show. He glanced back to his partner, curious what she had thought up this time.
Scully grinned conspicuously. "C'mon, you'll see soon enough."
Soon he realized that they were driving towards his apartment. Bad presentiments rose in his stomach -- never trust someone with Scully's humor with your apartment keys...
His worst suspicions were confirmed when he unlocked the door. The room was pitch dark, but in the little bit of light coming through the closed blinds, he could see that his desk was wiped clean. Scully closed the door and stopped him with a hand on his chest when he tried to step forward. "Don't, you'll just stumble upon something in the dark." She carefully tiptoed in and lit some candles on the table. Now it became visible what she had been doing -- the table was set for dinner. Mulder whined, "Scully.....!"
She repeated the words she had said when he had unpacked the present, "Just wait and see!"
Reluctantly, he sat down, wondering what she was planning. A moment later she arrived from the kitchen with two covered plates which she set down on the table to go get the wine. He peeked under the lids and found spare ribs baked in tons of grease and covered in barbecue sauce -- tons of that, also. "Since when am I allowed to ruin my health, Scully?"
"It's your birthday, I won't stop you today," she called from the kitchen, her voice somehow muffled.
"Scully? You need help?" He went over to the kitchen to see her halfway into a cupboard under the sink where he vaguely remembered to have stored a wine bottle or two. "You okay in there?"
"Like hell I am! How comfy is this position, do you think?"
"Hey, don't get mad at me, *I* didn't ask you to get stuck in there! Don't move, I'll get you out." He grabbed her around the waist and tried to pull her free, when she screamed in agony.
"Stop it, Mulder, are you trying to decapitate me?" She got an arm behind her back. "Take that bottle, then this dumb incident will at least not be totally useless. And hold on, I think I can make it, but I might fall over."
A few moments and lots of sailor's curses later, she suddenly got free and bumped against him when she lost her balance. Mulder grinned. "You coming onto me, Scully?"
She laughed, "Yeah, in the truest sense of the word!" She grabbed his arm and pulled him towards the living room. "C'mon, let's eat the ribs before they cool down again."
She hadn't been able to locate a chair with the right height for the table, so they both sat on the couch. They started to eat in a comfortable silence. After only a few minutes, Mulder had managed to get sauce over his whole face, but as that was exactly what Scully had intended with that mass of sauce, she laughed and reached over to wipe it away. He grinned, "Hey, that was my line!"
"Was it?! Did you have it patented or what?" she grinned back.
"I'm glad I didn't!" Suddenly he was serious. "You sure about this?"
She pretended not to understand what he meant, "About what?"
"Well, this looks damn much like a date to me."
"That's what it's supposed to look." She *was* sure, and now she could as well admit it. "Any objections?"
"Not the least!"
That about did it for Scully. She leaned over and did what she'd dreamed of doing for at least two years -- she kissed her partner full on the lips. He slowly slid his arms around her waist and pulled her closer, and the meal was forgotten.
When they had regained some consciousness of the world around them, lying entwined on the couch, Scully murmured, "We left your new TV at the office."
Mulder smiled, "I don't think I'll need a TV to fall asleep tonight."
The End!