Title: The Dying Light in the Glowing Shadow.
Warning: Blood. Evil Shiro. A little yaoi, a.k.a boy x boy. Slightly insane Ichigo.
Disclaimer: I do not own bleach
Ichigo glared hatefully at the mirror, two streams of tears tracked down his cheeks without any hindrances, before slowly dripping down his cheeks and leaving water mark on his face. The marks slowly dried before new tears appeared, but this time the tears didn't come slowly, but flowed freely down his skin.
He had enough of being compared to his much better brother, being compared not only at the school but also at the dojo. His brother, in fact twin brother, had top grade at school, followed closely by Uryuu Ishida, and Inoue Orihime. But he also had the looks and body.
His brother was also very popular amongst the males in their class. He was very good in combat and he always won in a fight. He was also known as a 'lady-killer' amongst the girls at the school, swarming him like moths to a flame, sometimes even some guys. He had many friends and was always occupied talking with them.
Even his father expected more from his brother, whose name was Shiro Kurosaki, ignore the name play. Kurosaki Isshin had big plans for his son, the younger son, the better one.
His brother had pale skin, almost the same color like his hair, which was snow white. It was spiky and going in every direction but was still soft to the touch, the strands barely covering the illuminating yellow eyes. The eyes were what stood out the most on his brother, as they were a sickly yellow, but many found it seducing, as an albino's eyes normally were red.
Ichigo was the opposite, having orange hair, like the fruit the color got the name from. His eyes were a bland chocolate brown, no life in them. Tan skin stretched over his muscles as he trained every day to at least be something.
Ichigo was literally living in his younger brothers shadow, always being compared to the brother who was faster, better, and stronger.
Once Ichigo had actually thought he had friends, a nice small group. He had actually been happy, and thought people actually wanted to know him, and not his brother. But he had slowly started to notice the groups wanted to go to his house whenever they were together. It was especially whenever Shiro's training had finished and he had come home.
Ichigo had dropped them the second they had started to become too much, always trying to get to know Shiro through Ichigo. After that he had built a stone hard wall around his heart, with no door leading inside to his fragile heart. Many had tried after that to know Ichigo, tried to get him to introduce them to his 'lovely brother', but he denied it every time, a 'no' even before they gotten the chance to open their mouths.
Now a scowl or a frown could be seen on his face everywhere and anytime. His eyebrows knitted tightly together as he would walk down the hall, glaring at any girl who still thought that he would suddenly become nice, giving cards with hearts on it, smelling like perfume, hoping he would hand it over to his brother.
He normally just crumbled it in front of them and threw it out; ignoring the many glares he got from the girls who comforted the crying girls, silently muttering curses after him.
He was labeled as a freak after that
He slowly started to get in fights all the time, beating group after group by himself. Many had tried to get him to join their group, they believing that he would come to them willingly. The leader normally just sent some of the newbie's. Ichigo normally just sent them back in a 'body bag' as they say.
But even after getting detention almost every day, even after getting sent home, even breaking a teacher's nose, his father still ignored him, favoring Shiro far more than he should.
Ichigo glared into the mirror, hate filled in his eyes before it slowly died, leaving only tired, lifeless eyes behind. His face became slack and mouth forming a thin line. He stared into his mirror but the only thing he saw his brother's face, smirking at him arrogantly, pose sure and relaxed. But there was a difference, instead of the normal white sclera; he had a night black sclera, surrounding his yellow eyes, making them stand even more out. He looked demonic in a sense.
'You'll never become something...' sounded in Ichigo's head, sounded like his brother's voice, teasingly, arrogantly and cocky. It wrapped itself around his mind and echoedthe words he thought every day. 'Father sometimes wishes that only I was born...' Ichigo watched the mirror as the image of Shiro's mouth continued moved, forming each word with a grin. 'I'm the king, Aibou...' Ichigo slowly shook his head, gripping his hair as the words slowly faded away, but still echoed in his head. He relaxed slightly, a relieved sigh leaving his mouth.
'And you will be the horse!'
The words were shouted and the orange haired male could almost feel them bounce off the walls and enter his ears. Ichigo stumbled away from the mirror, his hands gripping tightly at his hair again as he stared at the mirror ''I won't become the horse!'' He shouted, his voice hoarse from misuse
'But Aibou...' a smirk slowly stretched over his brother's face as he leaned closer to the mirror, eyes half lid in satisfaction, obviously finding satisfaction in 'You are the horse...'
Ichigo closed his eyes tightly, clasping his hands around his ears as he tried to block the sounds. ''No! I'm still the king, I'm still the king!''
'Admit it, Aibou...' Even after clasping his ears, even after closing his eyes he still heard the words. He somehow… just knew what Shiro was doing. 'Ya lost Aibou...Tha only reason ya were king, is because I allowed ya too be…'
Ichigo opened his eyes as Shiro left the mirror, his porcelain white hands were bracing against the frame as his white form pushed himself out. Shiro's smirk widened and stretched his face as he stared Ichigo dead in the eyes.
'Yer afraid Aibou...' Shiro said as he walked to Ichigo, his stance relaxed as he stared at his orange haired twin, looking at the mess his brother was even if he didn't show the great pleasure it brought him.
The words which had passed Shiro's lips were true. It was the truth, no matter how he would try and deny it. He was afraid. Ichigo had always been afraid of being left behind, staying in Shiro's shadow, becoming nothing more than 'Shiro's brother'.
Even when they had been nothing more than kids, when they had believing that Santa Claus was real and that the tooth fairy existed, the fear had been born. Ichigo had slowly been pushed to the side as his father had concentrated more on his twin brother than on him. Only his mother had stayed by his side, being there for him.
She had been his, not Shiro's.
His mother, Kurosaki Masaki, had become his world. She had been the sun and he was the earth circling around her. Ichigo had started to smile again; his eyes would lighten up as his mother would come to the dojo to get him. She would always comfort him when his father 'forgot' about coming to his matches so he could help Shiro with something instead..
But Ichigo knew that all good things had to come to an end the day Shiro would notice. Their mother was his, seeing as Shiro had their father. But Shiro didn't care, he wanted their mother's attention too. Ichigo hadn't wanted to share, he was afraid that his mother would forget all about him like his father had. Ichigo and Shiro had then had a fight, ending with Ichigo missing a tooth and Shiro with a bloody nose.
They had been angry at each other for a couple of days, before they became friends again. They had then played their favorite game when Shiro had given Ichigo a riddle that would change their lives 'What's the difference between a king and his horse?'
Ichigo hadn't known at that time, he had come with some answer which sounded right to him. One had four legs while the other had two, or one was an animal and the other a human. Shiro had just shook his head and smirked. ''The answer is instinct'
Ichigo had been too young at that time to understand it, too young to understand the grave meaning behind the words. Shiro had let Ichigo be the king, making him the horse, doing whatever the 'king' wanted. It had been fun, but it had also been the last time they played together. Ichigo still remembered that day, it being one of the few of his most precious memories.
Their mother had died the next day.
Masaki had been walking him home from the dojo, smiling and holding his hand as they had walked down the wet road. But to Ichigo it might as well have been shining as his mother was smiling, proud about her son.
It had then all happened to fast.
A driver had been driving too fast, ignoring the warning in the radio about the slippery road and had instead started to drive faster just to spite the radio guy. The tires had had problems of getting hold of the ground and it had resulted in the car getting out of control, crashing into them.
Ichigo only remembered being pushed to the side, the sound of tires squealing, the smell of burnt rubber and the many different colors of gray rushing by in a blur.
He had found his mother on the ground, her body facing the ground and her head tilting slightly to the side as a thin line of blood had slowly trailed down the corner of her mouth, her lifeless eyes staring blindly in Ichigo direction.
Shiro had beaten him that day, blaming him for the death of their mother. Ichigo had done nothing to stop his brother, to stop the pain but had instead accepted it all. He also blamed himself, still did to this day, and the hatefully words from his brother had sound like his own thoughts, so he had started to believe the words.
Shiro slowly walked to the body of his brother, his footsteps being the only sound in the room. His smirking looked like it was painted on as his eyes watched Ichigo's every movement. 'Ya were afraid, afraid of me… and of primitive instinct...''
''I'm not...afraid...'' Ichigo stated weakly, his eyes faltering slightly at his brother.
'But ya are afraid of the word... Afraid as it was something overpowering, something dangerous...' Shiro stared Ichigo in the eyes, nose only a few inched from Ichigo's own 'something like me...'
''I'm not afraid! You aren't scaring me! I'm the strongest! I'm the king!'' Ichigo screamed and clawed at the floor, breaking his nails.
'But Aibou.. If yer stronger than me... Then why's mom dead?' Ichigo's eyes widened at the true of the words. If Ichigo was stronger than Shiro, then why had his mother died when Ichigo could have protected her? 'You should have died instead of mother...' pale fingers slowly wrapped around Ichigo's neck, gripping tightly 'You should have died instead of mother!'
Ichigo clawed at the hand and tried to make to make Shiro let go. He stared at his brother with wide chocolate brown eyes before he placed his hands on Shiro's shoulder and pushed. But Shiro didn't move away, because Ichigo's hands pass right through his twin brother. Ichigo stared wide eyed at the other male and then to his hands and to his brother again, not believing it.
'Yer losing it Aibou...' Shiro whispered as he slowly walked backward to the mirror, eyes narrowing in delight at the pathetic man on the floor. 'Let's see if ya can be king again, Aibou...' Shiro then faded, seeping back into the mirror.
Ichigo just stared into the mirror, seeing his own pathetic image. His hand slowly trailed to his neck and rubbed the skin where Shiro's fingers had been, squeezing it. He had felt the cold skin against his own, felt each finger put pressure. Ichigo slowly stood up, his limbs shaking after the great shock of almost getting killed, and walked to the mirror.
He stared himself in the eyes, a flash of Shiro appeared for a second, before it was gone again. The sound of the mirror breaking sounded through the room, each shard clinging softly to his skin before as they felt to the floor. A dripping noise joined the small shard of glassed, the red color of blood slowly dripped down and forming small rivers.
The pain didn't register in Ichigo's mind, not the sudden cold from the open door nor the hand trying to oull his sudden slack hand away from the broken mirror. Ichigo just stared blankly at the blood mixed between the glasses. His eyes stayed at the small reflections in the glass, showing the reflection of him before flashing to Shiro again. 'Ya can never run from me...'
So even his reflection had betrayed him?
A hand was leading him away from the bathroom, from Shiro. His feet walked slowly over the floor, not caring about being found, after having screamed at a mirror and then smashing it. Almost every ounce of feelings had been sucked out, leaving him with the feeling of emptiness
His younger sisters were scared of him, scared of the person he was on the outer shell, not knowing that their scared looks were like a knife to the heart. The frightened eyes, the shaking of their bodies had killed Ichigo inside, almost as bad as his mother's dead. He blamed himself as he blamed himself for his mother's death.
A voice was speaking to him as fingers touching the cuts on his knuckles before touching the marks on his neck. The thought of it being Shiro flashed through his mind and he gripped the prodding hand with his injured one. He gripping so tightly that his knuckles became white, making the scars stand out.
''-Go... Chigo... Ichigo'' His father, Isshin said as he pried the fingers off his hand, staring Ichigo in the eyes with... Was that worry? Ichigo shook his head slightly, not believing that the man actually had feelings for him ''Are you okay Ichigo?
''I'm fine'' passed Ichigo's mouth without him taking notice, staring at the worried eyes of his father, still not believing. ''I'm fine''
It was empty words.
Isshin sighed before he stood up slightly, gathering a couple of items. ''If only you behaved like your brother Shiro...''
The second those words had passed his father's- Isshin's mouth he stood up and walked up the steps to his room, walking just out of reach from Isshin's hands. ''I'm not Shiro...'' he growled before he entered his own room.
The next couple of days passed in a blur, each melting into each other making nothing standing out. He woke up, changed clothes, went to school, went home and slept, only for it to repeat the next day.
The sky was the same baby blue, the clouds slowly crawling away with the wind, sometimes hiding the sun from being seen. The teacher was talking, telling the students about some author who had written the little mermaid and the life he had lived before he became famous. Ichigo didn't care; nothing at school interested him anymore.
The life in Shiro's shadow had left Ichigo all cold and tired, both emotionally and mentally. The only times Ichigo actually lived, actually had life in his eyes, was when he was beating people. The feeling of his fist hitting flesh, the feeling of blood, and the fear in their eyes as he beat them awakened Ichigo, made his body sing.
But he knew that even at fighting, at martial arts, Shiro was better. The high he usually got after every time he fought was slowly fading away, leaving faster and leaving the feeling of being empty behind.
He might as well call himself hollow, like an empty shell.
The bell rang and chairs scraped against the floor as every student ran out from the classroom, leaving for the cafeteria. Ichigo just sat back and continuing to stare out of the window. A few students had stayed behind, one of them being his brother.
His brother was as normally surrounded by his friends. But they didn't talk about the weather or some hot girl, but rather gave each other threats, flying fists and talked crudely to each other. Ichigo closed his eyes and sighed softly. When he opened his eyes again something yellow was in his face.
Ichigo blinked his eyes as he looked at the blonde hair, turning his head softly as he waited for the face to appear. The face faced him, and the first thing Ichigo noticed was the teeth, literally filling the whole face, like a row of keys on a piano. ''Yo! My name's Shinji, yers?''
Ichigo stared, not believing it. The guy must have been dared to talk with Ichigo, else he wouldn't have come to Ichigo, but instead gone to his brother. Better answer and be done with it. ''Ichigo.'' He stated before turning back to the window.
He heard the chair creak, pushing away from the table, he had left. So imagine Ichigo's surprise when the guys face appeared in front of his face again ''Oi, Wanna show me 'round?''
Ichigo glared at the guy, Shinji. He glared for a few seconds until he heard the familiar steps of his brother coming toward them. Ichigo closed his eyes and knew what would happen as it wasn't normal that anyone would say no to Shiro.
'''ey, Yer new here?'' Ichigo could hear the smirk in his brother's voice.
''Yeah, and yer…?'' Shinji's voice sounded bored, as if he actually didn't know who the albino were.
''Ma name 's Shiro. Yers?''
Ichigo just sat and listened to it, his eyes staring toward the window again, the reflection of Shinji and Shiro was there. It showed Ichigo how Shiro was standing behind him, talking with Shinji. How Shinji was frowning to Shiro, his teeth still visible.
''Hirako Shinji. New here''
Ichigo watched how the smirk on Shiro's face enlarged, how his eyes slowly closed and opened again.
Suddenly, the image of Shiro was in the window, the black sclera there 'Yer losing again Aibou...' the image purred beforedisappeared again.
''Want me to show you 'round then? Got nothin' ta do''
Ichigo closed his eyes and waited, waited for the familiar... ''No'' Yes...
Wait, what?
Ichigo's eyes snapped to Shinji, to see the glance Shinji gave to him before turning to Shiro again ''I'm sur' ya can miss one friend.''
A growl was heard before his brother walked away; a glare was sent his way, if glares could kill...
''Why did you do that? Why didn't you become friends with Shiro?'' Many different questions coursed around in his head, but the one with stood out the most was Why me?
Shinji just leaned back in his chair and smirked, his eyes shining with mirth. ''If I wanted to be friends with yer brother, then I woulda gone to him, and not you.''
Ichigo just stared before the smallest smile appeared on his face, his face for one with no scowl or frown. ''Thank you...'' was whispered before the bell rang again, students filling in, chairs scrapping back and books slammed onto the table. Their teacher walked in and the lesson began.
Eeehm… yeah, this was one of my old brain children, where I had absolutely nothing planned ahead, and it slowly grew a mind on its own xD I had first posted this on my former account, but I have moved to this one, and I have read the story through, changed some stuff and spelling mistakes, and might add something more that I didn't have in it before
I hope you liked this chapter and I'm looking forward to hear your thoughts on this one! :D I'll soon update Turkish Delight ^^