Don't Quit Now
BPOV
He left me two years ago. I dated Jacob for about four months at the beginning of those two years, but, of course, that ended badly. He almost attacked me when we got into a fight. It made me feel bad since I was kind of using him to cover up the hole he left in my chest. After the break up I started my classes at a community college in Port Angeles. There I fell into a bad crow. They hooked me up with a fake ID. We would go out to bars every night. And every night I would get so drunk I either couldn't see strait or I would black out. I knew it was dangerous but I didn't care, I still don't care. Charlie and Renee had disowned me after they found out what I had been up to and they couldn't get me to get help. Then were even madder when they found out I had dropped out of the community college. The people I hang out with aren't really my friends. All they do is provide a way home for me after a night of drinking, and give me drugs. I am in a bad place. I don't care if living how I do would kill me. As far as I am concerned I have nothing left to live for. It makes me wish Jacob had attacked me that day of our fight. That I had drowned when I jumped off that cliff. That Laurent had drained me of life that day in the meadow. That Victoria had found me and killed me. That one day I will overdose on some painkiller and die. But no, I am not that lucky.
(A/N: sorry about all this darkness, but she will get better!)
I have been sitting in this bar for the last five hours staring at a full bottle of painkillers and a shot of tequila. Thinking I could just take too much, I could end all my pain and agony now, with one swallow. I picked up the bottle and turned it in my hands. I started to open the top when his voice popped into my head again.
"Bella, don't do it. It's not worth it," he pleaded.
Silently, in my head I shot back, "what's the point? You're not here to save me. You told me you didn't love me anymore. You said you didn't want me. Why should you care if I die? I haven't spoken to Charlie and Renee in over a year. They don't care what happens to me they disowned me. I have nothing left to live for."
"What about me?" he asked.
Again, silently, I told the voice, "if you cared about me at all in the first place you never would have left! Every time I have tried to OD you were in me head, telling me not to do it, that you were still out there, that you would come back. Well guess what, you have yet to actually show up. I am through having your VOICE back me out of doing this. The only thing that could actually stop me is you yourself. But I don't see you anywhere."
I waited to the voice to talk back but he didn't. He was silent for the first time since he left, the voice was silent. I started opening the lid to the pills again. I dumped a hand full into my hand, popped them all into my mouth, and took the shot of tequila, swallowing every last pill. I almost threw them up a couple of times, but they finally stayed down. Then they started to kick in. Everything became blurry, hot, and then started to spin. I slumped over, resting my head in my arms on the bar. I waited for some of the dizziness to go away, then warily got up. I stumbled into a few people, trying to get outside. After what felt like an eternity, I made it outside. I went into an ally way, where no one would find me, or if they did, hopefully I would be too far gone to be saved. I slumped against a wall, heaving and coughing as I fell to the ground. I was sweating, my clothes felt so sticky against my hot skin. This is the end, I thought, my life is finally over. Was it worth it? Then just before everything went black, I heard the voice of the only one I had ever loved. He shouted my name in panic. His angel's voice was so distressed. I want to go wrap my arms around him and give him one more kiss for the last time in my existence, but it is too late. Darkness took me. And I knew it, I was dead.
EPOV (around the same time Bella is in her third hour of staring at the bottle of pills)
Life had become so meaningless after I left Bella. It was as if everything that was once full of light was now a dark nightmare. The first year after I left Bella I had tried tracking Victoria, but then lost her and went on to South America while she went up to Forks. I only found that out after Alice had a vision of Jacob's pack of werewolves killed her. Then last year I moved to Victoria, B.C. with my family. Not much had happened. I never talk to anyone except Alice, Esme, and Carlisle, though if I had a choice I wouldn't talk to any of them. I was with Alice at the moment hunting. I looked over to her standing by a stream, she turned and smiled at me, then froze. She had a vision. I went into her mind to see what it was.
Vision:
It was Bella, sitting at a bar somewhere. She was dumping a handful of pills into her hand. She then put the pills into her mouth swallowing them, then chasing them with a drink. She almost threw them up a couple of times, but she kept them down. She slumped over on the bar stool. After a few seconds she finally got up, struggling to make her way out of the bar. Outside I noticed the McDonalds and Movie Theater. She was in Port Angeles. Bella stumbled into an ally way. She fell into the wall, then slid to the ground. She coughed and heaved. She was dieing.
The vision ended.
Alice and I exchanged a look. We had to save her or she would die. We ran out of the forest and to our cars. "Alice, go home and tell Carlisle and everyone else what happened. Then drive as fast as you can. Bring Carlisle with you. I am going to find her now."
She nodded her head numbly. I raced to the ferry boat port. I could be in Port Angeles in an hour and a half. I would never forgive myself if dies. After the long ride I sped through the streets of Port Angeles. I finally got to the bar. Then I saw her, lifeless on the ground. "Bella!" I shouted running to her side. "Bella, please wake up. Please" I begged her. She still didn't move. I knew she still had some life in her, but it was quickly slipping away. So I picked her up and ran to the nearest hospital. I explained to the nurse she overdosed on painkillers. They got a stretcher to put her on and wheeled her away to a room to pump her stomach.