Do Not own The Big Bang Theory or any of the characters.

Hi again. So here is another story that I couldn't quite get out of my head and just had to write it down. I also got the idea well watching an old episode of Gilmore Girls (so I don't own that too, so please don't sue for borrowing this idea.) If you are not a fan of Gilmore Girls, you don't have to worry about being lost.

Takes place after, that dreadful episode, The Wheaton Recurrence. Penny needed her best friend to lean on after the break up but what if that person was the guy, she broke up with?

Oh and sorry for it being so long, I didn't expect it to be.

Anyways, Enjoy!

Lean On Me

She needed her best friend...

I love you

His words echoed inside of her head like a church bell. Her thoughts immediately filling with the events of that night he had whispered those words into her ear. They had been happy. She had been happy. Everything was perfect. But then he had spoken those three words so sweetly; his brown eyes blazing with devotion as he smiled warmly at her waiting for her to repeat them back. She had froze on the spot, the smile fading on her lips as she just stared at him like a deer in headlights. She had wanted to say them back...so badly. However, those words had always been the factor to end any relationship she had in the past. She didn't want this one to end like those ones. She wanted this to be the one that lasted. So she had decided not to say them back, letting them remain lodged in her throat as she had clamp her lips shut and just smiled. Quickly making an excuse before turning onto her side and pretending to sleep; not letting him see her cry.

Penny sat on the curve of the sidewalk, just outside of the bowling alley. Tears were streaming down her face but she took no notice of them. Her heart was beating loudly against her chest cavity as she tried to catch her breath and think. She had not planned on running out like that in the middle of the game but there was too much tension, too much pressure. She couldn't have taken it anymore. She had needed to get out of there.

"Oh balls," Penny whispered to herself, burying her face into her hands as a fresh batch of tears escaped from her eyes. What had she done? She had ruined everything between her and Leonard. Things had been going well with them, extremely well and then he had to go and drop the L bomb. Penny felt like everything was on her shoulders to save this relationship. She knew that Leonard would want to be with her, even if she didn't feel the same way he did yet. But then she couldn't get what Will Wheaton had told her out of her head. She didn't want to drag Leonard along like Wheaton had suggested she was doing. Leonard deserved better than that. So she had ended it; in an extremely crappie way, but was there really a good way to break up with someone? She thought to herself as she remembered saying "I'm Sorry Leonard!" before running out of the bowling alley, leaving all her things behind. She felt like a failure as she sat on the curve of the sideway still wearing the rented bowling shoes, her make-up ruined, her eyes red and bloodshot while her heart broke fraction by fraction.

The door s to the bowling alley opened, the sounds of laughter and music from inside spilled out onto the sideway as a group of people stepped out only a foot away from where Penny sat. However, she took no notice really of them as she was still thinking about Leonard.

Wiping the tears away, Penny brushed her hands on the sides of her jeans; letting out a deep breath. She didn't know where to go from here. She had driven here with Leonard and the guys. And she didn't have the guts to go back inside to grab her purse and Ugg boots that she had left, having to face them, having to face him.

Sighing, she rose to her feet. Figuring it was time to face the music, Penny began the long walk home.

xxx

As Penny climbed up the last set of stairs that lead to the fourth floor, she felt like she had been through the ringer both emotionally and physically. The walk had been longer than expected and it didn't help matters that it had started to rain. She was soaked through from head to toe as she made her way to her apartment.

Reaching into the back pocket of her jeans, she pulled out her key; that was the one thing she had on her. Quickly, unlocking her front door, she stepped inside and turned on the light. She stood there for a good moment taking in the surroundings of the apartment. She hadn't been gone long but it didn't matter. So much had changed since Leonard had knocked on her door earlier that night and she had greeted him with a kiss; trying to make up for the guilt she had been feeling. But now it did not matter. Tears immediately filled her green eyes but she quickly blinked them away as she placed the key onto the end table by the door and walked across the messy apartment towards the kitchen.

Opening up the fridge, she pulled out a bottle of red wine and placed it on the kitchen island before turning towards the cupboards. After retrieving a somewhat clean glass, Penny grabbed the bottle by the neck with her free hand as she made her way towards the bedroom. She was only in there for a second before entering the attaching bathroom. Closing the door behind her with the back of her foot, Penny placed both the bottle and glass on the floor before beginning to run the bath. Throwing in some of her favourite bath salts and bubble bath, the room started to fill with the scent of lavender. Taking a seat on the edge of the tub, Penny began to untie the bowling shoes, kicking them off before taking off the rest of her soaked clothing.

Leaving her clothes and shoes in the middle of the floor, Penny leaned over the tub to turn off the water; before stepping in the steaming bath water. A deep sigh escaped from the back of her throat as she just lay there letting the water wash over her, easing her aching body. She then poured herself a glass of wine, watching as a deep plum red liquid flowed into the glass. Once it was half full, Penny placed the bottle back down onto the bathroom floor as she raised the rim of the filled glass now to her lips and took a sip of the bitter liquid. Her mouth seemed to burst as the texture of the wine ran down her throat. It immediately made her cheeks flush with warmness. She took another small sip of the wine before resting it on the floor beside the bottle, letting her body sink deeper into the hot water. As she closed her eyes, two tears slid down her cheeks as a realization came over her. She would probably never see Leonard again.

He probably hated her guts now, she thought to herself. And who wouldn't? She had completely humiliated him in front of his friends and everyone else at the bowling alley. She had literally taken his heart that he had given her since day one and broken it into a million of pieces. She was a shitty person and a shitty friend. That had been one of things she had hesitated about when starting a relationship with him; their friendship. Over the two years, she and Leonard had become really good friends to one another. And she hadn't wanted to jeopardize that by jumping into a relationship with him but her feelings had grown for Leonard and there wasn't any turning back from them when she had kissed him in the hallway, 7 months ago.

But now as she sat in her tub crying, she realized that she had not only lost the first good man in her life. But that she had also lost her best friend. That's what made this thing ten times worse…

Her shoulders began to shake as controllable sobs came over her at this. Tears fell like waterfalls down her cheeks as she sobbed into her chest, wrapping her arms around her knees in the bath. Penny had never felt so alone in her life before until this moment; even compared to the time that she had first moved to California from Nebraska just fresh out of high school.

xxx

Penny stepped out of the now lukewarm water of the bath and reached for the towel that was hanging on the back of the bathroom door. Wrapping it around her shoulders, she took a seat on the edge of the tub, listening as the water drained. Reaching down, her fingers came into contact with the cool glass of the wine bottle. Wrapping her fingers around the neck of it, Penny brought the bottle up to her lips and drank until she couldn't drink anymore, until she needed air. Bringing the bottle away from her mouth; a coughing fit came over her as she fought for air as she choked on the bitter liquid as it ran down her throat. Wiping her mouth, with the back of her hand, her eyes looked around the bathroom. She wasn't looking for anything specific until her eyes fell onto the bottle of shaving cream resting on the bathroom sink beside the soap. It belonged to him. And just beside her pink toothbrush in the holder was his green one. And resting on the edge of the sink was his little black comb that he used to brush back his curly hair after having a shower.

She soon then realized that the whole room was filled with little reminders of Leonard. In the laundry basket that lay on the floor across from where she sat, was one of his many graphic t-shirts. He had spilled wine on it the other night and Penny had told him to leave here, saying she would wash it for him.

Sobbing quietly to herself, she bit down on her lower lip as she shook her head from side to side as if to shake the memory of him away. Suddenly rising to her feet, wine bottle in hand, she made her way into the bedroom. She tried not to focus on anything particular as she moved about the room, trying to find a fresh pair of cloths to put on; she was afraid that she would see reminders of him here too. After changing into a tiny baby pink T that barely covered her midriff and a pair of red shorts that had Hello Kitty printed over them, she turned to look at herself in the mirror. Her hair was frizzy and damp from the rain and clung in clutters to her neck. Roughly brushing a brush through it, she tied it up into a ponytail before reaching for the bottle of wine again and taking a swig from it.

A deep sigh escaped from the back of her throat as she moved back into the living room. Tears immediately filled her eyes as she stood in the threshold of her bedroom looking out onto the state of her apartment. It was a mess like usual but she looked passed that and only focused on the items that either belonged to Leonard or reminded her of him; the Superwoman comic book he had bought for her last Wednesday on 'New Comic Book ' day, the coffee mug that was made of Dark Vader's face, The Lord of the Rings: Return of the King special extended edition DVD box set, another one of his graphic t-shirts, the list went on and on. Sinking into the middle of her couch, she pressed the bottle of wine to her mouth as she flicked on the TV with the remote. She sat there for a few moments flicking through the channels and drinking deeply from the bottle until she heard the sound of footsteps within the hallway. They were home.

Muting the TV, Penny froze as she turned her attention towards the front door. Her heart beated like a jackhammer as she listened to the movement in the hallway, waiting to hear footsteps approaching. However, all she heard was the murmur of voices followed by the opening and closing of the door across the hallway. A wave of pain and rage coursed through her body as this. She was sure that Leonard would have come over to give her her things that she had left behind and to talk about what had happened. It hurt that he didn't seem to want to come over and discuss what had happened. Maybe, he didn't think she was home. She thought about going over there but quickly decided against it. She didn't have the energy or strength to see him at the moment she realized. Seeing him, would just make her heart break all over again. Looking into those puppy dog eyes of his would make her feel even shittier about herself then she already did at the moment. Curling up into a ball on the bright blue couch, Penny unmutted the TV and continued to drink from the wine bottle like a baby. She wasn't quite sure what she was watching, it was a black and white film of some sorts but that was all she knew. As she watched the couple on screen kiss as the sunset behind them, hot tears that she was unaware of rolled down her cheeks and into the nape of her neck.

It was moments like this that she wished that she had her best friend with her, telling her everything would be alright; just like that time over a year ago, when she had just broken up with that jerk, who had blogged about their sex life. After returning back to her apartment from being humiliated when she had crawled back to him, to find out that he was already sleeping with some slut not even an hour after they had broken up; Leonard had come over and watched old movies with her, rubbing her back telling her it would be alright. And it had been because he then had asked her out for the first time and she had said yes. She wished that he was here now doing the exact same thing like every time she got her heart broken by some jerk in the past. He was always there for her to lean on.

He was her best friend...She needed her best friend...

xxx

Penny's eyes fluttered open at the sound of someone knocking on her front door. She grunted as she tried to sit up but failed as the room began spin before her eyes. Her head felt like it was being weighted down by a 200 pound man. Her temples and the back of her neck ached terribly with pain. It was nauseating. Resting her head back down on the couch, she prayed that whoever was at the door would soon go away, leaving her to sleep. However, the knocking continued.

Moaning, Penny slowly sat up, holding onto the back of the couch for support as she rose to her feet. She felt exhausted; every bone in her body seemed to ache and protest as she moved towards the door. She couldn't remember how much she had ended up drinking last night but she assumed it was probably quite a lot. She hadn't felt this hung over and crappy before since her break up with Kurt.

Reaching out and opening the door, Penny rested her forehead against the frame of it, closing her eyes slightly before looking to see who it was.

"Leonard," she whispered in a horsed voice as her green eyes focused on his face and the events of last night came to her.

"You left these at the bowling alley...I thought you would want them back..." his voice trailed off as he looked away from her face and down at the items he held in his hands.

Penny's eyes followed his glaze; he held her treasured purple Ugg boots and purse. A slight smile appeared on her face at this. Even after she had broken his heart, he was still being kind to her. Leonard could have easily thrown away her things or left them at the bowling alley like many other people would had after what she had done. But no, he made sure that they were safely returned to her. Tears immediately filled her eyes as she continued to stare at her things. She was a jerk, she thought to herself.

"Thank you," she whispered after an awkward silence had passed between them. She hesitated slightly as she reached out to take the objects from Leonard, who was still avoiding eye contact with her. She wrapped her arms protectively over them, hugging them to her chest like a teddy bear.

"I just wanted to make sure, they got back to you safely," shrugged Leonard as he shoved his hands into the pockets of his jeans and briefly looked up at her. His brown eyes were filled with hurt and sadness, she noted as she stared back at him.

"Well, I should be going..." he spoke after a moment, tearing his eyes away from Penny once again and looking on at his feet.

"Leonard," whispered Penny softly as she shifted her purse and boots to her left side before reaching out and touching Leonard's wrist with her right hand; sending a wave of electricity through their bodies. Leonard suddenly looked up at this, a look of confusion written on his face.

"Can we talk?" she asked, titling her head to the side, her green eyes pleading with his. She needed to talk to him about what had happened last night. She needed to make things right between them. She needed Leonard to forgive her.

Leonard awkwardly appeared over his shoulders looking to his own apartment door before returning his gaze back onto her face. He could never say no to her, no matter how hard he tried. He then slowly nodded his head in reply.

Stepping back, Penny held the door open allowing Leonard to enter. The physicist was biting down on his lower lip as he slowly stepped over the threshold and into the familiar messy apartment. He stood awkwardly off to the side, watching as she closed the front door and placed her purse and boots down on the floor. He wasn't sure were to go from here. Penny's apartment had always been a welcoming place to him but now...he didn't know where he belonged in it, in a way he felt like Sheldon.

Perching her lips, Penny walked over to the couch and took a seat. Her green eyes looked over at Leonard as she patted the empty spot next to her. She watched as he nervously ran his hands through his mop of hair before walking over to the couch. He didn't sit right next to her but not so far away either, like she had thought he would.

They then both sat in an awkward silence for a good moment or two, both staring down at their feet. Penny didn't really know why she had asked Leonard in or why he had said yes for that matter. If the tables had been reversed and she had been the one who had been dumped, she wouldn't had wanted to talk. She would be furious. However Leonard was not like that. He always seemed to see the best in everyone; even if they were the world's biggest jerk to him.

"Penny," whispered Leonard as he raised his head and focused on her face, breaking the silence.

"No, Leonard, let me talk," interrupted Penny, softly but firm at the same time. She reached out and touched his arm before pulling away quickly. She needed to get this out before she lost the courage to do so.

"Oh...okay," murmured Leonard, his brown eyes looking down at where she had just touched him and then back up to her face. He was all ears now.

"I'm sorry," she began, her voice shaking a little. "I didn't mean to hurt you like I did, Leonard.

Okay, there is a part two to this story. Thanks for reading and please review, telling me if you liked or not!

Julie