ATHF: Carl's Fricken Awesome Adventure
By: DJ Legacy
Space Cortaz
"Oh those Mooninites make me so mad!" says Oglethorpe.
"Do we really need to fight all the time?" asks Emory.
"Yes they are our sworn enemies! They make my Plutonian blood boil!" Oglethorpe says as he shakes his flipper. There is a knock on the door. Oglethorpe opens the door. "What?!" Ignignokt and Err are at the door. They put a gift basket with a fuse at the door.
"Take this as a truce." says Ignignokt, Err is snickering.
"Oh well that is nice of you." says Oglethorpe.
"Well we best be going now we forgot to bring the peace pipes." They float back to their ships and Err is laughing.
"What's that hissing noise?" asks Emory. Their eyes open wide.
"Nein!" shouts Oglethorpe as the bomb explodes.
Meanwhile on Earth. Carl is at a car dealership.
"So you're not yanking my chain here?" asks Carl to the dealer.
"This car has 200 horsepower 7 airbags, iPod accessibility and the ability to travel through time!" says the dealer.
"You're not just saying that to sell me the car right? This car looks like that car from Back to the Future."
"It's safe I guarantee you."
"I don't give a rats-ass about safety I want bad-ass." says Carl.
"It's bad-ass and affordable." says the dealer.
"That's convincing enough for me I'll take it." Carl pulls up to his curb.
"Dayam tubs." says Shake. "You must have gouge deep in your bank account on this mother."
"No I got it for cheap. It can time travel too cup. So suck on that."
"How can a car time travel?" asks Frylock. Frylock peaks his head through the car.
"You see these buttons here? I just push these buttons enter the specific time and area and bam! I'm there." Carl gets in the car and types in 1945, New Jersey. "Then I just drive up to 80 miles per hour. It'll send me there." he drives off and when the dial gets to 80 a light surrounds the car and gets transported to 1945 New Jersey to where there houses would be. "Fricken awesome!" he looks around. "Not so fricken awesome. I feel like messing with Romans." Carl gets in his car and goes to ancient Rome. "Now this is fricken awesome!" Some Romans stare at Carl. "Hey how you doing?"
"Who's this?" asks a Roman in Roman.
"Hey I like to stay and tell you about the future but I got a dictator to beat the crap out of." says Carl as he gets back in his car. He goes to 1944 Germany and is in Hitler's mansion while gun-fire and bombs going off.
"Vas?" says Hitler.
"This is for all the Jews you killed Hitler." he gets out of the car and beats Hitler with a baseball bat and kills Hitler. He kicks him in the stomach and drives off. Some American soldiers arrive.
"Hitler he's dead!" says one of the American soldiers.
"Looks like somebody beat us to him sarge." says another soldier.
"Let's call it a suicide poisoning and lets get out of here." says the Sargent. Carl arrives to Texas before Kennedy was shot and sees Oswald holding a gun.
"Not today asshole." he gets out of the car and wrestle him the gun accidentally goes off and hits John Kennedy.
The President has been shot! I repeat the President has been shot!
"Oh crap!" Carl runs into the car and drives off. He arrives back in his own time and Frylock, Shake and Meatwad are in the same spot.
"Hey Dr. Who is back." says Shake.
"Shut up cup." says Carl. "This car is fricken awesome I am keeping this bad boy."
"Carl you think I can get a ride?" ask Meatwad.
"No fricken way I might have women in there I don't want the car smelling like meat when I'm banging broads from the middle ages." says Carl.
"Ok what does banging broads mean?" asks Meatwad.
"Whatever I don't have time to talk I'm going to talk with Jesus maybe he can conjure me up some good weed." he drives off.
"I guess that's where the term holy smokes comes from." says Shake then laughs. Meatwad and Frylock stare at Shake, Shake looks at Frylock and Meatwad. "What?"
The End