The Real Pokemon Master by. Ininin

Verse1

Yall act like yall aint never seen a Pokemon before

Jaws all on the floor like Misty and Ash just burst through the door

And started stealin' her pokemon and callin her a whore

Throwin the weak ones over furniture {Horsea?}

It's the return of the "I caught a new Pokemon!"

"One day I'll be a Pokemon master"

Then Brock said...NOTHING YOU IDIOTS!

Brock's gone, we're stuck with Tracy

Little girls love Pokemon "Pika, Pika, Pikachu

Look at them I'm sick of them"

Walking around blindly through time

Always saying their names, yeah but they're so cute though!"

Yeah I probably got a couple of cards in my pocket

But it's not worse than what kids do for Team Rocket

Sometimes I wanna get on T.V. and say they suck!

But I can't, but it's cool for Misty to hurt her Psyduck

"Meowth's on your lap, Meowth's on your lap"

"And if you hurt him, I'll give you a little smack"

Hurting people is the message they deliver to little Kids

And they expect them not to know what a faint is

Of course they're gonna know what an attack is

By the time they hit 1st grade they HBO, don't they?

Most pokemon are mammals, well, some of 'em cannibals

Who eat other pokemon like cantaloupes

But if they can show dead animals and antelopes

Then there's no reason why they can't show holes in Piccolo

But if you feel like I feel and Ash is a hoe

Misty wave your pantyhose sing the chorus, here it goes

Chorus

I'm a Pokemon Master, yes I'm a real master

All you other Pokemon Masters, are phony disasters

So won't the real Pokemon Master please stand up

please stand up, please stand up


Verse2

Pokemon don't have to curse on their show to get viewers

Well I do so f--- them and f--- you too

You think I give a damn about a Horsea?

Half of the Pokemon can't even stomach me let alone stand me

"But Tyke what if you win wouldn't it be weird?"

Why so you guys can just lie to get me here

So you can sit me here next to Professor Oak

Misty better go ahead and switch me chairs

So I can sit next to Ash and the black guy Brock

And here them argue over who she gave love to first

Little snitch put me on blast on Kid's WB

"Yeah he's cute but I think he's married to Stephanie, he-he"

I should upload her photos on Playboy magazine

and show the whole world how you gave Ash a baby

I'm sick of little golden Pikachu all he does is annoy me

So I've been sent here to destroy him

And there's many of them just like him

Who dress like him, who just say "Pikachu" like him

With fur like him walk, talk and act like him

It just might be the next best thing but that's not him!

Chorus

I'm a Pokemon Master, yes I'm a real master

All you other Pokemon Masters, are phony disasters

So won't the real Pokemon Master please stand up

please stand up, please stand up

Verse 3

It's like a head trip to listen to

Cuz they're only giving you things you battle with your friends inside your living room

The only difference is they got the real Pokemon

And yall got the Game Boy and Pokemon cards

They just get on the show and do it

and whether you like to admit it Meowth shitted


Better than half of them Pokemon out there

And you wonder how come kids eat up these cards like chips

But its funny cuz at the rate they're going when they're thirty

There'll be a lot of people in the nursing room trading

Abra's for Ekans while they're jacking off and battling

I said they're fighting but these internet tips aren't working

And every single animal is a Pokemon lurking

They could be searching garbage cans at Burger King eating all the onion rings

Or in the parking lot running from little kids

With their teeth out and their paws up

So will the real master please stand up

And put one of those Pokemon on each buckle up

And be proud to be battling animals for a sport

And one more time as loud as you can how does it go?

Chorus

I'm a Pokemon Master, yes I'm a real master

All you other Pokemon Masters, are phony disasters

So won't the real Pokemon Master please stand up

please stand up, please stand up

***

I guess there's a Pokemon Master in all of us
Fuck it, let's all stand up