Rejected Jungle Laws
Thou shalt not make out in the make up room.
Thou shalt not walk in on people who are making out in the make up room.
Thou shalt not make fun of Father Wolf's boy band poses.
Thou shalt not add "Boy" to the end of every sentence.
Thou shalt not sing "I'm putting my pants back on."
Thou shalt not yell "WHAT THE FRICK!!" during intermission when you hear about what happened in the make up room.
Thou shalt not need to go to the emergency room on opening night.
Thou shalt not open the curtians early.
Thou shalt not scream at the ceiling.
Thou shalt not ask Baloo, Bagheera, and Kaa where babies come from.
Thou shalt not yell "WHAT THE FRICK!!" when you hear the answer.
Thou shalt not give Shere Kahn a tazer.
Thou shalt not make fun of Kaa's wiggleworming.
Thou shalt not hit on the little seventh graders.
Or the eight graders.
Thou shalt not pay attention to the fact that if we're all one big family, then what went on in the make up room is worse than we thought.
Thou shalt not repeatedly meow in the green room.
Thou shalt not complain about the size of the wings.
Thou shalt not spear Council Rock.
Thou shalt not use a spear as a baton.
Thou shalt not sing about poisining pigeons in the park.
Thou shalt not skip over the "conceited mongoose" line.
Thou shalt not murder the mongoose.
Thou shalt not laugh while wearing latex.
Thou shalt not trip on the stage.
Thou shalt not step on the microphones.
Thou shalt not retrieve a tissue from the make up room.
Or ask for a touch up on make up.
Or get latex glue.
Or ask to join.
Thou shalt not rant about Harry Potter.
Or Sweeny Todd.
Thou shalt not sing the song "Why Can't We Be Friends."
Thou shalt not give in to Shere Kahn's peer pressure.
Thou shalt not give in to Father Wolf's peer pressure.
Thou shalt not resist Roscoe the Chee-kawn's peer pressure.
Thou shalt not break Jungle Law.