Elena was left alone when Damon decided to called it a night. It was actually better this way she have had enough of Damon's and Stefan's lectures about how she doesn't wanna be this person and how it's best for her to turn her feelings back on, the truth is she doesn't care anymore about what they think. Before she was a vampire it was all the time about doing what was best for Stefan and best for her friends, it wasn't ever in her best interest. They thought she was happy, and foremost they thought they knew what was best for her, they were so blind about how they felt and what they wanted for her, that they never had stop to ask her what she wanted, she was so insecure and so afraid to loose them to the point where she couldn't be herself, because if she just had let go off like she wanted, if she just had acted on her feelings, she dreaded she would have lost Bonnie, Caroline, Matt, Jeremy and above all Stefan. But Why she hadn't fear to loose Damon? Why the thought of loosing Damon didn't even crossed her mind? for the simply fact that she knew he would never judge her, he would always love her no matter who she was, no matter how she acted, and he had promised her he would never leave her. And of course how Damon would have leave her if she had acted on her feelings for him on the very beginning?, but that wasn't the point eventhough she had chosen to be with Stefan he never left her, whereas the minute she told Stefan she had feelings for Damon, he left her he turned her back on her and let her feeling even more guilty than how she already felt, he made it clear that he wanted nothing with her if she was with Damon, and he became a completely jerk with both of them, even if it wasn't Damon's fault, even after all his attempts to defend his brother and make things right between the both of them. That was when Elena finally saw the difference between the both brothers.
So yeah... it could be really disapointing to realize that after all your attempts to make one person happy in spite of your happinness, to see that his love for you wasn't unconditional, whilst the brother you have hurt countless times was still there for you, after you had hit him where it hurt him the most, his insecurites, the thought of your love for him not being real.
She really wasn't sure how to felt about that, she wasn't even sure she was feeling at all, but there was something she was sure of, Damon still loved her, in spite of everything and anything she had said to him, he was still there fighting for that love. Yeah, Stefan might be there as well, but he was doing it out of guilt, because it was him who let her die, he was just trying to fix her, nothing new really, but the point was that they both were still there being a nuisance trying to stirr up some feelings in her.
Suddenly a loud bang broke her out of her thoughts, and it was when she saw Damon approaching.
"You look terrible" Damon said with his usual cocky voice.
"That's because I'm starving" her face lighten up when she watch as Damon was giving her a bloodbag, so hungry to question his intentions, she accepted the blood bag.
"how do you feel? hurt because I betrayed you? angry because I caused you pain? or scared? because you know it's gonna get a lot worse?" Damon said when she startarted choking with the bloodbag filled with vervain.
Elena flashed across the basement just to have Stefan blocking her path.
"So that's how you want to play" Elena said with a creepy smirk "Let's see who breaks first" she said turning to Damon "Me" then turning back to look at Stefan "Or you".
With that Stefan closed the door behind him locking it up, then he took a few steps toward Elena "Something tells me it's going to be you" he said, meanwhile Elena felt strong arms embracing her, and everything went black.
Elena opened her eyes just to closed them quickly again after she felt a unbearable pain crushing her, she tried to move but she felt weak, really weak, that's when she remembered, the vervain she thought.
"Morning sunshine" she heard Damon saying from some spot in the room behind her "You most have a terrible headache, waking up after have been vervained ouch worst than a hangover."
Elena tried to moved just to feel a stirring pain racing through her "I wouldn't do that if I were you" Stefan said pacing in front of Elena, scrutinizing her, Elena may not have any feelings now, but it got to Damon's nerves, she was still her girlfriend hence Stefan had no right to look at her like that, in a flash Damon was between him and Elena.
"How do you feel baby?" Damon said in a little to smug voice for Elena's tact.
"What are you doing?! another feeble attempt to make me feel?, c'mon give it your best shot it won't work"
"I would't speak with such confidence" Damon said, suddenly Elena felt like she was been burned down alive, she watched with horror as her arm was lightening on fire.
"Stop it, stop it...Aaaaaaah!... Please!" she felt the pain decreasing, and she turned to the source of her pain.
"So what now? You're both gonna torture me until I feel again? What you're gonna win with all of this Stefan is not like my feelings for you will return or something" with that Stefan slide off the curtains once more, Elena started screaming again, this time a little bit longer.
"how do you feel about it Elena? About the fact that Damon's standing still there watching while I torture you?" Stefan retorted
"I feel nothing for him either" This time Stefan took a steam of vervain and stroked Elena's face with it, her screams were almost deafening
"Well that's fine since we're are going to kill you, but not before we torture you a little" Damon grimaced a little at that, Elena started laughing.
"You really think I buy that Stefan? I'm not really sure about you anymore but Damon rather die before he lets anything bad happen to me" Elena corrected with a confident smile.
Stefan shove the vervain down Elena's throat this time," then how do you explain the fact that he's not trying to stop me" Elena started coughing.
When the vervain effects were diminish enough to let Elena talk she answered "Because he's desperate, he's using the Lexi method since his walk down memory lane didn't work, he's hoping the girl he fell in love with will return" Damon's demeanor softened a little.
Stefan just staked Elena beneath the heart. With that Damon lashed out, and punched Stefan on the face sending him across the room.
"That's enough!" Damon screamed "Get out of the room now".
Stefan got to his knees trying to steady himself and stood up "Don't be stupid Damon".
"I said get out" His hazel blue eyes were burning with anger, and a glint of protectiveness, Stefan knowing that in this state Damon could break him like a twig, just walked away to the parlor.
When Damon heard the door shut he turned to Elena "What was that about? You feel or you don't? Or where you just messing with me to get Stefan out of the room?" Damon said in a sad cold voice, he was hoping Elena was starting to feel but he really didn't know what to think, he would have to go through her, see deeper, see the bigger angle, he was going to break her, he would stop at nothing to get the girl he fell in love with back, the only problem was that maybe she will break him first.
When Elena stayed quiet Damon said "You know"' Elena glanced at him, watching him thoroughly.
"Know what exactly?"
"You know that I would never let you die that I would always protect you above all and spite of everything and anything, that I would even die for you, and I don't know how to feel about that, A) That bitch facade of yours is starting to dissipate or B) You're even a bigger bitch that Katherine, like that's possible, that you would use that in your own interest and not feel a crap about it or how would that make me feel"
"What can I say? I wanted Stefan gone, I feel nothing for you Damon I made that clear when you were acting like me date at the prom" Elena looked at the floor, there it was that glint of Elena, his Elena, Elena has never been a good liar, and he could tell right now that Elena was lying, those harsh words that came out of her mouth weren't truly her's.
"You know that I don't bought it right?" Damon told her, searching for her eyes.
"Think what you want Damon' I don't care" She replied avoiding his eyes.
"Then why are you avoiding my gaze?" Damon said his eyes firmly still on her.
"I'm not avoiding anything" Elena said angrily looking up at him.
When their eyes locked, Elena felt her wall of annoyance and denial dissipate, that was the effect he could cause on her, she now remember, that feeling of warm, home he evoked on her every time he looked at her, that feeling of passion, of need of... no she could't let herself feel, that thought couldn't even crossed her mind, so instead of caving she looked down again, breaking that strong connection they both felt when their eyes were locked like that.
"Do you felt it?" Damon said, in a low tone of voice that wasn't audible for a human, but Elena heard it loud and clear.
"Felt what?" Elena said in a cold and detached voice, Damon's heart broke at that, he really had thought they have had a connection going on there.
"Stop it Elena, stop acting like you don't care" Damon said he vas starting to loose his nerves, dammit he loved this girl, but she could sometimes really drove him crazy.
"I'm not acting Damon!" Elena said, lashing out. She at least was feeling anger, Damon thought, that has to be a progress.
"Oh are you sure about that? Dammit Elena you feel and you know it!"
"And how are YOU so sure about THAT!?" Elena said dragging the words.
"Because you have to, you couldn't have been so sure about my feelings for you and have spoken so confident about them and not feel nothing about it!" He really was starting to loose it.
"Well I don't" Elena retorted the detached edge in her words making its way back.
"Please Elena do something anything to hold on to, anything that proves me that the same sweet, caring, selfless girl I fell in love with is still there somewhere beneath this stone, cold bitch" the desperation evident in Damon's words.
"I can't Damon" something in Elena's words was slightly different, he had gotten through her, he had to keep going, he was close, he could sense it, he was close to get his girl back, his Elena, his sweet beloved Elena.
"Yes you can Elena" Damon said softly.
"No I don't, if let myself feel, all I feel is pain, grief, I lost everything Damon, all my family, Jeremy was the only thing holding me together, now I have nothing left to hold on to, I have no one left that loves me after everything I had done" Elena said, the look on her face was clear as the water, he couldn't screw it up now, she was starting to let herself feel, she was on the edge, this was the defining moment, the wrong words, and she would snap, he would return back to where they started.
"No Elena, that's where you're wrong, you still have so many people who loves you, a family, you have Caroline, Bonnie, Matt, Stefan, April, god I wish I could have at least half of that people caring about me, and of course you have me, I would never, listen to me Elena, never leave you, I promised you that not so long ago, and this is me keeping that promise, I won't give up until I get you back, I will do anything in my power, not matter what it takes, Was I clear?"
"Damon... I... I can't, with Jeremy's dead I don't know how to keep going, everything will just rush out of me"
"Elena it might be hard at the very beginning, but you'll come to realize that there are bigger feelings that grief, that will make it all worth it" he wanted to tell her, he really wanted to tell her that her love for him will be enough, but he wasn't so sure himself about it, he really didn't think his love was enough, reality check in he has never been enough.
"What other feelings?" Elena said with a mocking tone "Love?"
"Yes Elena! love!, don't you see it I still love you exactly the same as the time I realized I was in love with you back when the Miss Mystic Falls Pageant happened, and we shared our first dance together, as the time when I told you I was in love with you for the first time and compelled you to forget it because I thought I didn't deserve you, as the time I kissed you and you kissed me back knowing that Stefan was starting to be himself again, as the time you told me you broke up with Stefan because of me, as when we made love for the first time, as when you told you'll love me even after this is all over, as when you told me you wanted to grow old with me, I love you Elena I will always love You, I don't think that anyone has ever loved someone else as much as I love you" That was it, that was all it took to broke Elena's wall.
"I'm so sorry Damon" Elena started to sob "I don't know how will I ever make it up to you' after everything I had say to you, after everything I have done to you... I...I'm... I'm so sorry" Elena started to cry, she was crying a river, Damon couldn't bear the thought of her crying, he could never had, so he tried to sooth her.
Damon took her in his embrace and said "it's okay baby, I forgive you" he took a spare strand of hair behind her ear, and started to stroke her back, with slow movements tracing patterns in her back. Then he kissed sweetly her forehead.
Elena eased down a little bit "It's not okay Damon, how could you ever forgive me" elena said trying to snug closer to him, but failing because of the tight ropes holding her hands to the chair. Damon tore them apart, and Elena hug him back, the familiar sense of warm overtook her, making her never want to get out of those strong arms, who's owner she had the privilege to call her home.
"Because there's nothing to forgive" Damon said taking her closer to him.
Elena not wanting to take the subject further and just enjoy having him again told him"Damon, I love you I have never stopped loving you, it was always you and it will always be you, so thank you" she said with all the love that has been trapped inside of her.
"You're welcome I guess, but may I asked for what?" he said his bright blue eyes giving her a questioning look.
"To still be here, to still love me in spite of everything I had done to you, I love you I love you so much, you have no idea"
with a playful smirk he told her "Prove it"
Elena catching the drift smiled back at him and taunt him with a very slow but passionate kiss "You may want to take me upstairs"
Damon's eyes burned with lust, he didn't want to wait anymore, he had hold back his passion for her so much time that it was going to explode out of him, it was consuming, so not waiting any longer he put her on his arm, and rushed upstairs with her, it was a very long night after that.