Chapter 1 Amanda's POV

I'd never actually thought my life could change, in any positive manner that is. Too many negative things happened to me to even think a glimmer of hope was even a possibility. Every day in my closet I guess was considered a room looking at the wall feeling sorry for my low life status, pleading to God that my dad didn't come in. I was beat repeatedly each day bruises and scars never left my body clear, I'd dropped out of high school mainly for that reason, but there was also the fact that I'd never been good at school, not one subject, although I did pass gym and art. I just wasn't book smart and I really didn't see why I should go on anymore with something I was no good at, I had better things to do. Well not very many things that were very productive to society, but it was better than failing almost all my classes. I mean, I guess it was, well maybe it wasn't but I truly never saw myself being a smart gal with a degree or two under my belt. Maybe I wanted to work for a grocery store or a drug store but spending most of the time at home with a husband that didn't mind helping around the house or with the kids and he being good looking wouldn't be so bad either. Eh maybe it was asking a lot, but after the life I'd lived, I kind of thought I deserved a little warmth in life.

One especially rough night for me I dodged my drunk father who was trying and failing to keep me from sprinting out the front door.

"Where do you think you're going?" He sputtered

"Away from you!" I screamed back, bounding down the street. I couldn't take it anymore. I'd lived this way for much too long, and I was going over the edge and no one was there to pull me back. At least that's what I thought at the time.

I wasn't very good at lying to myself and making myself believe it, but I did all the time anyway. I told myself, the monster that lived in my house would be gone soon. The monster was my dad. I told myself he'd sober up someday and wouldn't hit me as much and maybe he'd start to be more like the other dads and try to help me in school, well that wasn't in the cards anymore but he could sign me up for sports and maybe even practice with me every once and a while. I knew it all would happen as soon as pigs flew, but I lied to myself saying it was possible anyway. Maybe he'd treat me like a princess like my best friend's dad treated her. Evie could do no wrong in her father's eyes. And I sure wished I had that. So I lied to myself, that my dad could change, y'all know that one feeling when you know it's a lie but you can't bring yourself to admit it because the truth is too scary to look at as reality? Well that was the feeling I had in the pit of my stomach at all times.

The wind blistered my face and stung my arm where my dad had stabbed me. It'd been ten o'clock when I'd left and I was real afraid of getting jumped, but being away from my dad was more important to me. I'd probably walk to the first convenient store I saw or whatever place looked like it would sell bandages. I might even crash in an alley for the night if the fights weren't so bad on the streets. Which I was in luck in that case at least because the roads were utterly silent. I trudged on folding my goose bump filled arms across my chest as if it gave me warmth, the temperature outside had to have been under 35 degrees and I didn't have a sweatshirt. Chills ran up and down my spine and all over my body. Tears ran down my cheeks silently as I thought about the tragedy I guess was considered my life. Seeing a gas station I'd never been in, a quickened my pace, the store looked decently sized and would most likely have what I needed and most places were closed by now so I decided to give the place a chance, it was really my only option. I peeked into the door and that's when I saw him. I looked him up and down, he was absolutely gorgeous, the kind of boy that people stop to look at to admire his natural handsomeness. Or the kind you see in those dreams where the boy of your dreams that could do so much better than you it's nuts is with you. I scrambled for something to say, but my mouth was dry. Butterflies burst in my stomach and I stood there motionless. The name Sodapop was sewn on his blue button up uniform shirt. That was sure a unique name. Not funny or weird, just unique, even an original name. Just like the rest of him. He had eyes like I'd never seen. They were brown with gold in them and they had a wild and reckless look to them, they almost seemed to even smile. His hair was a heavenly dark gold and was greased back and you could see the time he'd probably put into doing the stunning mane of hair. That was the word! Stunning. He was as stunning as a breath taking sun set. He smiled at me his teeth gleaming a natural gleam. And I tried to smile back, but I knew my smile would never compare to his. He put his elbows on the counter he was behind and ran his right hand through his hair.

"Hi there." He smiled again, I knew he probably smiled that way to everyone, but I couldn't help but get tingly. I didn't say anything for a minute and then sighed inwardly, gaining the courage to talk to a guy like him.

"Hi, um I… well." I started to walk at a tremendously slow pace out of the doorway, when the door slammed into me unexpectedly and I landed face first on the floor. It didn't hurt all that bad, I kind of just lay there for a moment, I could feel the embarrassment flooding my face. How could I be this clumsy in front of the cutest guy I'd ever seen? Oh boy, I was real embarrassed, I needed to get the bandages and get out of here. Better yet, forget the bandages and dodge for the door. Yep, that sounded best. I lifted my head and lunged upward, hitting my head on something hard.

"Ow!" I screeched. I looked up to see Sodapop kneeling and rubbing his chin.

"Glory, I'm real sorry 'bout that." He said genuinely. I was the one who should've been sorry but he didn't give me a chance to dull my apology out.

"Let me help ya up." He was already up and offering me a masculine yet delicate hand to assist me. How could he manage to be so many things at once? Well, however he did it, it sure as hell worked for him, he was a dream guy, even if he worked at a gas station. I shook my head to rid my daze and took the hand. And he gently, yet firmly pulled me up. Gosh darn he seemed perfect.

"So what can we do ya for?" he asked when I was up and kind of backing away real slow like.

"Maybe some bandages if you don't mind." I said trying to be as nice as I could, flashing the flirtiest smile I could think of, but then lost it noticing the blood streaming off my arm all over the floor of the store. I was a little embarrassed even. I looked up at him and his eyes no longer had that reckless look about them, they weren't bursting with feeling no more either. They didn't look like they had any feeling really, they were blank, like any regular Joe's, I didn't like that one bit.

"Holy shit." He whispered lightly under his breath. That's when I noticed he was staring at my arm. Was I the reason he didn't have an expression in his eyes? Nah, I couldn't be, me and him didn't even belong in the same sentence. I didn't deserve to walk on the same ground he did, let alone carry on a conversation with him. His smile wasn't there anymore either. His face was just, well blank.

"Well I guess I better go then." I stuttered a bit walking backwards towards the front door to the store. He looked confused for a minute, but then probably figured out I was going to make a run for it. He then started to walk towards me and I crashed into the door just as clumsily as before, but this time I didn't care. I didn't even know why, but I had to get out of there. Maybe it was because for once in my life, there was a chance someone cared what happened to me, I didn't know for sure, but it scared me. Probably because my dad never gave a rat's ass about what happened to me, and my mom had left us when I was two, so she obviously didn't give a shit either. So maybe I was scared that someone actually cared, to be perfectly honest, how could you blame me? My circumstances didn't leave much room for care.

"Hey wait up!" his soothing voice oozed, seemingly only steps behind me. I tried to speed up, knowing that it wouldn't do me any good. But again, I lied to myself. I gulped and made a sharp turn into the first alley I saw. I collapsed into it, and scraped my knee. Even in darkness, I could see the blood staining my jeans. My favorite pair. Damn. I knew there was a huge chance that he was standing right behind me, but I truly couldn't help it anymore. I curled up holding my knees and cried harder than I'd ever cried before, harder than when my dad had broken my leg with a wooden baseball bat, harder than when he'd stabbed me earlier that night, even harder than when he'd hung me by my arms from a swing set with a rope. And I didn't even really know why I was crying so hard. It wasn't nothing it was everything. I squeezed my eyes shut as tightly as possible. And tears streamed down my face. I kept trying to get a breathing pattern out, but it only made me hyperventilate. I felt a hand on my shoulder. I flinched. There was huge chance it was the gas station boy, but there was also a huge chance it was a giant hood, looking to jump someone, and my vulnerable state seemed like the perfect target.

"Who-Who are you?" I managed to sputter out. The hand removed itself and I could hear footsteps coming to face the front of me. I put my head between my knees, so I didn't have to look at the person.

"Don't be scared." A voice like honey murmured reassuringly. I knew who it was just by his voice, but I denied myself. He didn't care enough to leave the store unattended and follow me. I was just some random girl, who he had nothing to do with. I shivered and a jacket was wrapped around me. I had to admit it was nice to be warm. I still didn't look up.

"Please let me help you." The voice came again. I was still very reluctant at this point, so I just ran my hands up and down my legs.

"You don't even know me." I tried excuse fully. Why couldn't I just see what this guy might be offering? So many questions ran through my mind I thought I might have a nervous breakdown. But I kept it cool.

"I don't have to, just let me see what I can do to help, man." My throat got knotted up and I finally had the sense of courage to look up. Sure enough, there he stood kneeling over me like he had in the store, only this time I didn't practically break his chin. When he saw me look up, he offered me a hand. But I just buried my head in my knees again and let the tears come right back. Then something I really hadn't seen coming happened. He brought me onto his lap and started to rock me back and forth. That probably should have been a little awkward, but it wasn't it just, it wasn't.

"Shhhh, you'll be alright, just let me help you out and tell me what's going on and everything will be fine." He cooed. "Please just come with me. I don't want to hurt you."

I didn't really know what to say to that. Here I was, in complete stranger's arms and they were asking me to let them help me. I was really putting my life on the line at this point, but, then again, I did it every day with my dad.

"You got a place to stay tonight?" he asked, I could tell that he already knew the answer, but I lied anyway.

"Yes." I said sheepishly.

"Let me rephrase that, do you have a safe place to stay tonight?" he pressed, knowing my answer would change. I just shook my head.

"Come on, I promise I won't hurt you, come with me, please, I know you don't know me but I can't leave you out here like this."

"Don't feel sorry for me." I uttered blandly. He put me off of his lap and stuck his hand out, yet again.

"I don't want to move." I said stubbornly. I was in true pain, and at that moment I probably couldn't move even if I tried. He laughed under his breath and then smirked at me.

"Then you brought what I'm about to do on yourself." What was that supposed to mean? I shuttered a bit. And then tried to think of all what that could mean. Then he swooped me up abruptly and began to walk. My mouth was open in shock. But I couldn't be mad or stay mad at him, like I could a normal person. He made it impossible. Probably how he gets out of punishment. I'd thought to myself. He looked over at my surprised face and gave me a killer smile. It made me go even weaker in the knees than I already had been. Which was a pretty hard thing to do. He made me smile. I took a good hard look at the situation I was in and wondered how I could be smiling. Then I looked at him, and there the reason was, right there. A guy I barely knew.

"Don't worry, Bella will help you out." He reassured me. I had no idea who Bella was but maybe she could help me. He opened a car's door and set me in shot gun. Then went in on the other side and got into the driver's seat. We drove on without any other words. I started to get kind of scared. He'd smile at me every once and a while. But I was getting really freaked out. After all, I didn't know this guy and I was in his car going who knows where. I started to try to think of a way to run out. Now that I thought about it, I was really freaking out. We pulled up to a bit of a rundown house with lights on and some shadows walking around inside. Sodapop looked at me again and nodded for me to get out of the car. I opened the car door and stepped out, or at least tried. I put pressure on my right leg and felt excruciating pain run up my leg from when I'd fell in the alley. I started to wobble a bit and would have fell back but sodapop was right behind me and caught me like a trust fall. I could tell that it would have hurt if I did fall so I guess I was grateful.

"Wow there, be more careful, darlin'." He sighed holding me by my fore arms, that's how he'd saved me from the fall. Something came over me at that moment. I started to try and run and escape his grip, but he just firmed it. That's when I started to scream. Stuff like 'let me go' stop it!' 'What's wrong with you?!' he looked at me confused, and loosened his grip to where I could almost get away.

"What the hell soda?!" A tall, broad shouldered man, maybe in his early twenties boomed from the yard of the house we'd stopped in front of. Three other smaller, younger boys, but still teenagers stood behind him. They all had confused looks on their faces but the oldest one looked madder than anything else. Sodapop let me go lightly and I collapsed onto the concrete side walk. I felt like a wimp, I always seemed to be crying. I mean, I knew my life was tough, but geez. All those boys that had been standing by the house came walking toward me. I started to awkwardly crawl away backwards. I could feel the fear building up in my eyes. And I willed myself not to cry.

"I'm sure Soda has a good explanation for this, don't you buddy?" One of the boys snickered, though I didn't see which one and I heard someone slapped him on the back. I looked up to see Sodapop reddening helplessly, and rubbing the back of his neck. He looked down at me and I looked away.

"He'd have better." The older broad shouldered one said, firmly clenching his teeth and aiming his nasty look right at Sodapop.

"What's going on, the baby's trying to sleep." A girl's voice groaned, annoyed. I looked toward the front door where the voice had come from. A fair skinned blonde, maybe 5`1 and a half stood in the doorway with a tan baby on her hip. She pranced out the door and seemed like she was walking right towards me.

"Boys, you don't even know this girl, why are you hovering over her?" she snapped shooing them away from me. She kneeled down and eyed me for a moment and then hoisted the baby that I believed to be hers, though they looked nothing alike up her hip. She extended a fragile hand in front of my face. By her manner, I knew she was a feisty little thing, but there was a sympathetic look behind skeptical eyes.

"Come with me sweet heart I'll get you away from these boys. She gave them all a death stare. I grabbed the hand, I probably trusted her more because she was a girl. I limped using her free shoulder for support, though the pain was still drilling right through my leg, I ignored it. I looked back at Sodapop, he had a guilty look in his beautiful eyes. That made me feel guilty too. Knowing I was the cause of the guilt. We walked into the old house that smelled of chocolate cake and beer. The girl told me to sit down on the couch. I was nervous but not scared like before. Something about her presence was comforting, her smile made you feel like you'd known her your whole life and the way she looked at you, like she was compelled to listen, made you want to spill your guts, even if she didn't ask. She'd handed me the baby, which she confirmed was hers but didn't mention who the dad was. His name was Dallas and he was a real cutie pie, he had black hair with bangs that could use a trim and big round black eyes. He was a tan little thing too, he definitely didn't look like his mom.

"Please let me talk to her." I heard Soda's voice plead from the door. The girl crossed her arms over her chest and shook her head.

"You all stay out here for a minute, I 'ma talk to her. And also, I'll get back to you Sodapop Patrick Curtis." She hissed.

"But I…." Soda seemed to begin. After being told to shut up, the door slammed. And the girl sat next to me and smiled as if I was an old friend.

"Now we are a very friendly set of people, here in this house, I'm Bella, I'm the only girl that lives here, I'm the one you can trust for now, but you can depend on the boys later. I won't say a word to any of those boys. They're real good people if you get to know them." So that was the girl he'd been talking about! She placed a hand on my leg that wasn't in pain.

"What's your name hon?" she continued

"Amanda Furtado." I said, my voice cracking. She smiled at me and then at the baby. She sure was pretty. I thought she could be a model if she wasn't so short. She had dark, understanding, green eyes, and almost dirty blonde but not quite hair down to her rib.

"I love that name, Amanda is one of my favorites." She smiled. And I don't remember how but she got every last word of my life tonight and on a regular basis. She looked at me sympathetically and told me everything would be ok. I wished I could believe her.

"Well how's the girl's love fest going?" A dark haired boy who had his hair greased back complicatedly scoffed. Bella arched an eyebrow.

"I thought I told you guys to stay outside." She said rolling her eyes.

"Well if you didn't know it ain't sunny out there." One boy about eighteen or nineteen with rust colored side burns chimed in with a snicker. I noticed Sodapop staring at me sadly and when he saw me staring back, gestured for me to follow him, probably to talk to me about tonight, I mean what else could it mean? I scooted as far as I could away from him who sat on the couch without falling off. His shoulders slumped and I looked at my hands that laid my lap. This was one of the weirdest nights of my life.

"Well if you boys wore something other than muscle shirts, you wouldn't be so fucking cold." Bella snapped.

Out of nowhere, a face appeared under mine. It smiled a devilish smile.

"Hi there."

I jumped and let out a small yelp. That'd scared the shit out of me. I realized it had been the one with the side burns. The baby started to cry from my jolting him. I started to bounce him on my leg and he clapped happily.

"You're good with baby's ain't you girl?" Sideburns smiled slyly. I looked back down and the baby, Dallas buried his head in my chest.

"You wanna know what I'm good at?" I heard Bella snap. No one said anything but a taste of fear filled the room. I heard a huge smack, good aim, landed right on his cheekbone, pretty sad I knew that just from the sound.

"Damn it Bella, you really are good at that." I heard side burn's gruff voice whimper, I knew she'd slapped Sideburns. I winced. That really must of hurt, I'd definitely had worse, but that still must've have hurt, there was no denying that.

"Alright, why'd you hit Two-Bit?" The guy with complicated hair sighed with frustration.

"He's scaring the girl more than she already is and frankly, my kid almost fell of her lap, so excuse me for caring not that you boys do any of that!" Bella retorted. Wow Bella seemed protective of me and she didn't even really know me. All the boys looked down at the ground, ashamed. She sighed and told them she didn't mean it, and they were better right away.

She was the mom of the group, and they sure needed one.

"Well I think it'd be best if we all hit the hay and y'all went home, ya hear?" The broad shouldered man hadn't talked since outside and had a stern look on his face, he always seemed to. He seemed kind of maybe hardened from things that happened in his life. Oh well, that wasn't my business. They all obeyed and I kind of wondered if I should go too. But Bella gave me a reassuring look that told me to stay put.

"If y'all want cinnamon rolls in the morning I'll have them on the table by seven." Bella informed.

"We'll definitely be here." Slurred Side Burns , who stood at the doorway. And name was apparently Two-Bit, what kind of name was that anyway? Whatever. They walked out the door for the night.

"Well darlin' you really shouldn't be anywhere else tonight, you're safe here I can assure you, no matter what bone headed move Soda tried to pull." Bella glared at Sodapop for a moment, but then turned back to me. I didn't say anything and a guilty bomb burst inside the pit of my stomach. I was so confused on what to do it was crazy. But I chose to take the risk and just bum here for the night, it wasn't any worse than my other options.

"I'll sleep on the chair if that makes it better." She pressed. Why did these people care what happened to me? There was no time to ask those type of questions. I just nodded.

"Great! I'll get you a blanket and pillows, do you want one or two?" She babbled, clasping her hands together.

"Uhhh…" I stuttered. Not knowing how to respond.

"I'll bring you two and you can choose then how's that?" I nodded and smiled a thank you. A boy maybe fourteen glared at me and then left the room. What did I ever do to him? I'd thought. Then the broad shouldered man nodded a goodnight to me and messed with Sodapop's hair and walked out of the room. I looked away from Soda, the only person left in the room and hugged my knees. That was a bit awkward.

"Hey, I'm…" he'd started to walk towards me, but Bella walked in and he'd backed up and shut his trap real good. They all seemed intimidated by this petite blonde. And I understood why, she may have been small, but by the way she slapped Two-Bit she didn't take no shit. She told Sodapop to go to bed and leave me alone and he listened to her and left with his head hanging down low. I bit my lip guiltily.

"Alright sweetie here's a blanket, coziest one in the house. And two pillows, you have a good night hon." She ran her hand across my face, turned off the light and walked into another room. I lay on the couch thinking about tonight until I couldn't bare it anymore, the thing that I couldn't get out of my head was his flawless face, his smile may have been lot of things at once. And I couldn't get him out of my head the rest of the night. Which is probably why I dreamed about him the whole night. Why did I dream about him being my prince charming what the fuck was wrong with me?

I woke up the next morning at about six thirty. No one seemed to be awake and I decided to leave before anyone else woke up. I was careful not to be too loud, I had practice from the times I'd escaped the house under my dad's nose all those times. But this might be different considering the fact that none of them were passed out from a hangover. I folded the blanket neatly and set it on the back of the couch, I then stacked the pillows and set them on the right cushion. I peeked down the hallway to see if anyone was there and no one was. I gulped and then walked towards the door. I looked down the hall way one more time which was straight in front if the door. My eyes bulged out of my head when I saw HIM rubbing his dazzling eyes. I ran forward and lunged out the door not looking back. I know I seemed really wishy-washy but I was so confused in life, adding a boy into the mix was the last thing I needed.

the best part about him, it was as reckless as his eyes. How could I be flaunting over someone that scared the shit out of me? I didn't know was lying to myself because I knew it definitely wasn't going to work this time.

So, I hope you enjoyed it. I enjoyed writing it and im really glad I finally got the guts to post it. for those who hated it, PLEASE don't put a ton of hate. well, anyways, I know Amanda comes across wishy washy, but how was she supposed to feel about soda? I mean come on. shes so confused in life I feel bad for my own character. oh and who are bella and dallas? find out next chapter!

XOXO

Jess