We were created by God at about the same time, and as far as I could remember, Lucifer had always been by my side. There was not a moment in my life where I had not known Lucifer.
"So how did it come to this?" I thought bitterly as I stood at the edge of heaven, staring woefully at the flaming star above.
"I knew you'd be here." the familiar voice of my brother came behind me. Turning around, I saw the equally familiar face staring back at me. I looked in sorrow at his body, full of wounds from the war.
I smiled sadly, "Of course I'm here, Lucifer. This is our spot."
"Michael, Michael! Quick! Come here!" the young Lucifer shouted, barging into my house. I looked up from reading to see his face in front of me, innocent eyes shining with excitement.
"What is it?" I asked, curious.
Without saying anything, he grabs my arm and starts running, pulling me along with him. I don't say anything as we run out of the city, where young angels like us aren't allowed to be. The adults always warned children not to venture out of the city, where there were no solid roads and nothing but clouds. One misstep might cause one to fall, and young angels can't fly back up with their undeveloped wings. I glanced nervously at the dense clouds underneath my feet, afraid that one might deceivingly give way. Feeling me tense up, Lucifer looked back at me and grasped my hand harder, smiling reassuringly, mouthing trust me before looking back ahead. My trepidation vanishes like smoke, my trust in Lucifer taking its place.
I follow behind Lucifer, his hand still holding mine comfortingly, until he finally slows down to a stop. There were no more clouds in front of us. I step in front of Lucifer and the sight leaves me breathless. All fears forgotten, I walked to the edge, taking in the unending universe right in front of me, stretching to where my sight can't see; a myriad of sparkling stars glittering in the sky seemed to be looking back at me.
Lucifer smiles contently, plopping himself down on the cloud, looking up at the sky. "I found the end of heaven." He says, a proud look evident on his face. "You like it, don't you?" I nodded, laying down next to him, still looking at the sky.
"This'll be our special spot, a place for only the two of us." Lucifer beamed, and I grinned back, heart swelling with happiness.
"Look at that star, it's so big." Lucifer points at the star closest to us, he stares at it for a while in childlike awe, before asking, "Stars don't die, right?"
"I don't know." I replied honestly.
"Probably not." The star shines brightly at us, as if affirming Lucifer's words.
"It's going to live forever, like us." I said positively, looking at the majestic star. "It's going to be with us forever, unchanged."
"Yeah." Lucifer agrees earnestly. "We'll be together forever."
Forever. My face breaks into a huge smile unconsciously.
The star sparkles at us, as if witnessing our vow.
The star shines bright up above.
"He sent you to deal with me, didn't He?" Lucifer says with contempt.
I don't say anything, but I can tell he knows the answer anyway. It pains me realizing how much he has he changed, how different he is from his young self, and yet we still understand each other like we did when we were children.
I, who understood Lucifer the best, should have confronted him when the first thoughts of sin were conceived. I, who was closest to him, should have stopped him when the seeds of rebellion were sown. Now the only thing that remains is regret, eating up my heart as every second passes by.
"He wasn't what I expected Him to be." Lucifer says after the first time he meets God.
We were at the usual place, sitting at the edge of heaven after an exciting day at school. Lucifer had been looking forward to meeting God for a long time, and we finally had the chance to interact personally with our Father today. So I was surprised, to say the least, to see the disappointment on Lucifer's face. I had expected him to feel the same reverence I felt for God.
"What do you mean?" I asked, bewildered.
A flash of doubt passes through Lucifer's face. He hesitates, before starting cautiously, "He just wasn't as...powerful as I thought He would be. There was no force or strength in His actions or His words. I don't really know how to explain it, but He seems...weak." Lucifer answers. And for the first time, I see a hint of disdain on Lucifer's face. My heart stirs uneasily, what had made him think like that?
"That's not true, Lucifer." I replied solemnly, "How could someone who created the heavens and the universe be weak?"
Lucifer stays quiet, expression conflicted and uncertain.
"Look at that, Lucifer." I said, pointing at the star above us. Lucifer looks up, and his expression softens. "Isn't it beautiful?" I asked. He nods. "God was the one who created our star."
Lucifer's expression turns unreadable, even to me. For the first time, I can't tell what he's thinking.
The star seemed to gleam brighter than before.
The star shines brightly above.
I don't know what to do. God ordered me to throw Lucifer out of heaven. Why did I have to be the one to do it? Facing my brother right now, it pains me just thinking that I have to be his demise. How could God think I was strong enough for this?
I wonder, if I had yelled at him, shouted at him, fought him when he first had sinful thoughts, would he have changed his mind? Or would he still lead a third of the angels into war, fighting against his own Father?
"Are you just going to stand there like an imbecile?" Lucifer says, jolting me out of my thoughts. I still stay quiet, the words stuck in my throat. Lucifer looks unimpressed, "I'm just going to leave then, since you have nothing to say." He turns around and starts walking away.
"Don't you regret this?" I finally forced out. Lucifer stops, and turns around with the same expression of disdain I first saw in him. That same disdain that led him down this destructive road.
The disdain that tore us apart.
I feel the anger bubbling inside me as I see the distaste on Lucifer's face. I'm angry at Lucifer for starting a war, for causing our severance, for hurting so many people. For hurting me, my mind tells me in betrayal. And deep down, I know I'm most angry at myself for not doing anything to stop him in the beginning.
"Look at that, Lucifer!" I raised my voice in anger, pointing to the fire and smoke coming from the city. "Do you have any idea what you've done by starting a war? All the gratuitous violence and suffering you've inflicted?"
Lucifer raises his brow haughtily. "Do I look like I care?", he says boredly. "It's not my problem that they weren't strong enough to protect themselves. And the Old man is just too weak to protect them." Lucifer sneers conceitedly.
"Weak?!" I hollered, not being able to contain my rage anymore. "Weak?! Look at you Lucifer! Where are you now? Escaping with your tail between your legs because the 'Old man' defeated you!"
In an instant, Lucifer grabs my collar and grits out menacingly, "I did not get defeated-"
"Stop being ignorant! You lost, Lucifer! You lost!" I ruthlessly threw him on the ground.
Lucifer snarls, "It's not over, I will win!"
He scrambles in an effort to get up before I thwart his plans; binding his arms and pressing him onto the ground, I made sure he couldn't escape.
"You're never going to win, Lucifer!" I asserted forcefully, desperate to get the fact through his willful mind.
Lucifer stopped struggling soon after the increasing blood loss from his wounds takes a toll on him. Instead, he just glares at me, a face so full of hatred that it almost seemed to distort his appearance. At the very least, I can't seem to recognize him anymore.
I feel weary after the outburst, more so mentally than physically. More than anything, I feel helpless. "Why are you doing this?" I asked my brother tiredly, a hint of resignation in my voice.
"You know why. I never hid it from you." Lucifer answers coolly.
After graduating from the angel academy, we both took on jobs serving God, and because of our skills and talents, we both shot up in rank, becoming archangels. I was proud of Lucifer, and certain that after serving God in closeness for some time, he would have no more faithless thoughts towards his Father.
Though we see each other, we're too busy to have a decent conversation. After what seemed like ages, we finally get the chance to meet at our usual spot again. I was excited to see my best friend after a long time, eager to talk and laugh with him like old times again.
The first thing I notice when Lucifer arrives is his supercilious manner and cold countenance, he looks at me with indifference before smiling, his smile void of all the fondness and tenderness from before.
"Who is this person?" I thought in dismay. "Lucifer?" I asked tentatively, not knowing what to expect.
Lucifer sits down next to me, and looks up at the star. "Did you know stars die?"
"What?" I asked, unsettled, and slightly fearful.
"They burn brighter and brighter, and then they explode into nothingness." Lucifer says nonchalantly.
"...they do?" I whispered apprehensively. Lucifer proceeds to laugh witheringly at my expression, which just increases my fear. The star that I always looked up at? The one I thought was eternal? The one that symbolizes our promise of friendship and brotherhood? That star was going to die?
"Even things God create dies." Lucifer says scornfully, looking up at the star.
Was our friendship going to die too? This patronizing person beside me certainly affirms that fear.
"God is incompetent."
The dreaded sentence comes out.
"He doesn't deserve the title 'God'. I will be God. One who doesn't rule in power, is not a ruler."
My worst nightmare was coming true. It can't be! What's happening?
I stand up in a panic, looking at Lucifer in disbelief and horror.
This can't be happening... I repeat again and again in my head, as if things would be better by doing so. Lucifer smiles cruelly, knowing exactly what was going through my head.
I stood up, backing away in fear, looking at the familiar, yet so estranged face. The Lucifer I knew was gone. Refusing to accept the reality, I ran away in ignorance, as if the problem can be solved if I avoided it.
"You're weak too." Lucifer remarks, just as I get out of earshot.
I'm weak.
The star shines bright as usual.
The star above burns with fiery, as if set ablaze.
I looked in anguish at my brother beneath me. It's the same place, the same star, just like the past. "But it's not the same person." I thought in misery. The same face had lost all traces of warmth, affection and innocence, in its place was pride, ego, and vanity.
The cold eyes glaring at me made it clear, Lucifer was dead. He's never coming back. With that realization, I spread my wings, clutching my brother's wounded body, I flew off from the edge of heaven into the darkness.
"What are you doing?!" Lucifer exclaims in alarm.
"I wish it didn't have to end like this."
The star above flares.
Stars don't die, right?
Lucifer looks at me maniacally as he fails to spread his injured wings. There was no escape.
"I'm sorry." I said sadly. Lucifer's expression turns into fear and panic.
The star above ignites in fire, and explodes.
It's going to live forever, like us.
I throw Lucifer down into the darkness with all my strength and resolution.
"Goodbye, Lucifer."
The embers of the star fall down with Lucifer, the fire diminishing along with Lucifer's glory.
We'll be together forever.