Disclaimer: Song is by Backstreet Boys. People/Characters owned by WWE.
Dedication: Lil sis, this is for you. Just a little example of how your Edge muse should behave!
Author's notes: Took out the first verse and a little repetitive thing at the end, just because. Anyway, tried not to be angsty at all…not sure if I succeeded.
As Long As You Love Me
Although loneliness has always been a friend of mine
I'm leaving my life in your hands
For a very, very long time wrestling has been my primary goal in life. Heck, it's been my only goal in life since I first walked into the old, run-down gym a couple of blocks down from my childhood home. Many have warned me about the isolation of being a wrestler, but I didn't care.
'Trust no one,' they used to tell me, 'and be especially wary of those who claim to be your bestfriend.'
It made no difference to me. I knew what I wanted, and I went after it with as much fervour as was possible. It was slow going and, much to my disappointment, it was lonely. My almost religious zeal to live my dream even blinded me to my brother's growing jealousy, and to those little whispered lies in his ear that eventually led to the disintegration of our relationship. I had lost my only family, and I had gained a new friend – solitude.
It was a long time before I found another – Stephanie McMahon.
People say I'm crazy and that I am blind
Risking it all in a glance
And how you got me blind is still a mystery
Our relationship is questioned whenever possible. Mostly they are directed at me. Why her? Have I lost my mind? Is this temporary insanity? Do I need a lobotomy?
The truth is, I don't know. Ever since her return, there has been a change in me. A need that only she ever manages to fill. Before her father had surprised the world with the announcement of her new position as SmackDown General Manager, she came to me. Not with an assertion of her power, but with an apology. She apologised for all her past actions that may have affected me.
I was wary at first. There was a stranger standing before me, her eyes filled with sincere regret. More shocked at her sudden appearance than her words, I could only nod. She had smiled at me then. A warm, genuine smile that had made my heart skip a beat.
I can't get you out of my head
Don't care what is written in your history
As long as you're here with me
Many had spoken of her undeniable beauty, but I had never joined in the idle gossip. It wasn't that I didn't find her attractive – far from it. It was more the fact that I just didn't care. How was the life of, from all reports, a spoilt Princess and the malicious wife of Triple H be of any concern to me?
But it was a long time before I could get that smile out of my head. It haunted me. Although she had only ever graced me with it once, I wanted to see it again, to experience that heart-skipping, heart-racing sensation that had accompanied it. I waited a full week before she smiled at me again. That same Stephanie smile she had charmed me with on her return.
It was then I think I became addicted to it. That smile.
Every little thing that you have said and done
Feels like it's deep within me
Doesn't really matter if you're on the run
It seems like we're meant to be
When she had come searching for me, asking me of where my loyalties lay, I had stared at her, stunned. Did she honestly believe that I would ever sign with that piranha? Did she think that I would just leave her…now that I had just found her?
I wouldn't. I couldn't. And so I made her a promise. I wasn't going anywhere. I wasn't going to leave her. I trusted her.
I saw something flash in her eyes at those words, and I knew that I had struck a chord. Trust was something that was alien to her, and I vowed then and there to myself that I would be the one to enable her to trust others, to trust herself. To trust me.
I don't care who you are
Where you're from
What you did
As long as you love me
Who you are
Where you're from
Don't care what you did
As long as you love me
In the past the concept of 'trust' and 'McMahon' was laughable. In many ways, it probably still is. But I recall the flicker of shocked gratitude in her eyes, and of that smile, and I am untroubled. She is, after all, also Linda's daughter. I refuse to believe that her mother hadn't instilled in her morals, values, and basic goodness. I only need to remind myself of the Stephanie she was before she tacked 'Helmsley' to the end of her name. And I am unconcerned by her past. Her marriage to Triple H, her various alliances and feuds with too many men to even remember. Even her long-ago deeds and conduct that are, at best, horrible.
I am not daunted by her name, and by her history. I have little care for any of it.
I do care about the present, the right now. I care about the way she looks at me with those eyes, about the way she smiles at me, about the way she lightly touches me on the shoulder and wishes me 'good luck'. I care about the way she trusts in me.
I've tried to hide it so that no one knows
But I guess it shows
When you look into my eyes
Our gradual friendship didn't go unnoticed. It seemed that I was the only one willing to grant her a second chance. I was the only one who would actually talk to her willingly. I could tell that she was hurt by the lack of affability within the roster towards her. There were some new faces around, people who had yet to meet her, and they too were wary in approaching her. But as the months flew past, several of them became her closest friends.
It didn't take long for our friendship to bloom into something more. The questions never stop, but they have become less serious, more teasing. That's okay. We can handle it. We can cope with anything. Together, we have trust.
And we have love.
Who you are
Where you're from
What you did
As long as you love me
For a long time she had always been Mrs Game, The Billion Dollar Princess, Daddy's Little Girl. McMahon. Even The Boss Bitch.
Eventually, she became just Stephanie. The Stephanie who changed my life, and who subtlety amended my priorities in life. The Stephanie who softly murmurs the words that renders me breathless every time.
'My love.'