AN: Ok, so Mia and Kenny are together, but just as in the original story,
her heart belongs to Michael. Let's see what happens though when Mia gets
a little tipsy... A little bit of a Princess Diaries/ 10 Things I hate
about you Combination... Oh, and by the way, I AM COMPLETELY HAPPY that
this is SOOO much LONGER than my other fanfiction!!!! And even if the
story isn't all that good, I feel like I have improved some!! ...Ok...
sorry about that!
Mia's POV
This party totally sucks. I am not even joking. But then again it completely sucked even before I got here. Besides all of the things that are wrong with me that I really don't feel like thinking about right now, tonight Kenny topped the list. Yeah, I know he is my boyfriend, but he is a really crappy one. Sure, I am not the greatest girlfriend in the world, what with the whole me not letting him kiss me and the whole I am in love with my best friends brother thing, but here is what happened before we reached Josh Richter's Apartment, (yes, Jock Richter's, I will explain later).
He tried to feel me up! HE tried to place HIS HANDS under MY shirt!
IN FRONT OF LARS!
What kind of person DOES that??? WHO??
And besides, what did he think he was going to find under there anyway? I could have told him that it would be a total disappointment, IF I HAD BEEN EXPECTING IT!
But I mean, WHY would he think that I would want his hands on an area of my body that no one except my mother and the doctor who delivered me has seen, (oh, and anyone who might have seen me that time that I went streaking at Lilly's when she dared me)??? I don't even let him kiss me! Doesn't he think that before he goes placing his hands in places like that, we should have frenched kissed first?
Let me tell you that when he did this, I didn't take to kindly to it. I mean, I'm sitting there in the limo letting him kiss my cheek and then all of the sudden, BAM, there goes his HAND! What I did next was a complete accident, well not really an accident more of a reaction, that I am kind of sorry for if he is never able to have kids, but then again he completely deserved it.
I kicked him. Yes, I kicked him, and I will give you three guesses where, but the first two don't count.
'WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING???' I said, glancing over at Lars who I noticed was settling back into his seat, and I'm not sure, but I think that he might have been trying to hold back a laugh because his eyes began to water and he started to cough.
'...Mia... I thought th..at... well... that since we were alone...' he said bending over and gasping for breath. Have I ever said how much I love my combat boots???
'ALONE???? DO YOU NOT SEE ANOTHER PERSON IN THE CAR???!!! AND EVEN IF THERE WEREN'T'
Kenny sat up finally, red faced from what was either lack of oxygen or embarrassment.
'You mean that even if Lars hadn't been in here, you wouldn't have...'
'OF COURSE NOT! I DON'T EVEN LIKE YOU!' Ok, so I really didn't mean to say that last part, but I couldn't really help it. Whether he deserved to know the truth or not, I deserve not having to worry about having a perv- o for a boyfriend.
I pushed a little button to let down the glass between us and the driver.
'Could you please stop the limo??'
'Of course Princess,' he replied. The glass moved back up.
I thought of Grandmere and put on the scariest look I could think of, minus the drawn on eyebrows, and said in that calm creepy voice that she uses when she is really angry, minus the cigarette inflicted rasp.
'Kenny, could you please remove yourself from the limo?'
'But Mia... I didn't..'
'If you aren't able to remove yourself, should I ask Lars if he could be so kind as to assist you?' The voice must have really worked this time because he quickly got out of the car.
By this time it was one hundred percent sure that I didn't want to go to any lame party that Josh Richter and all of his jock friends and their cheerleader girlfriends were going to be at, but Lilly had asked me to go to help shoot for her very first show that had been picked up by NBC. It is supposed to reveal how beer companies target teenagers and try to make them believe that getting falling down drunk will make them 'popular'. She is also using it as a way to show the American public exactly how vain and ignorant Josh and Lana are.
Plus Michael is going to be there.
How could I refuse Michael AND making a fool of Josh and Lana in front of the entire nation??
And ok, so obviously it wasn't going to be just Michael, Lilly, Lilly's camera, and I going to the party. The whole school had been invited because Josh was wanting to break some sort of Guinness Book World Record for the most people in a 10 x 15 room and with his parents away in Key West, or somewhere like that, he had the perfect opportunity. We probably still wouldn't have even been invited anyway if it had not been for Lilly volunteering her video camera to use as the proof to send in.
So Lilly, Shameeka, Ling Su, Boris, Tina, Kenny (ehh...), Michael and I were all going to go, to help support Lilly. Or at least that is what everybody said, but I think that they were all, just like me, pretty curious, about what goes on at parties like that.
So after crying in the limo for about five minutes, and having Lars cheer me up by promising he wouldn't tell Grandmere about what happened, because, after all he might end up out of a job seeing as I handled the situation pretty well all by myself, we showed up at the Moscovitz's to pick up Lilly and Michael and Boris.
Only it wasn't just Lilly, Michael and Boris. I might not be the greatest when it comes to Algebra, but I can count four silhouettes behind a dark limo glass.
When the door opened I finally figured out who the other person was. Judith Gershner.
Could this day GET any worse???
I would find out later that it could.
So they all slid into the limo, which when Judith did, I had this really overwhelming voice in my head that made me want to scream that 'YOU NEVER SLIDE INTO A CAR!' I realized that that probably would have been a total Grandmere move, so I decided not to.
Lilly started to buckle up and said 'I really hope you don't mind, but Michael and Judith were working on some computer club stuff and since she was coming to the party to we figured she might as well just ride with us.'
Sure... 'Computer Club Stuff'
Maybe it's just me, but I am thinking that it was the same 'Computer Club Stuff' that Kenny was trying to go over with me earlier. But I didn't say any of that.
I put on my most Princessy voice and said, 'Of course, it would be silly for her to have to find another ride.'
How silly would it be of me to push Judith out of the car? I added in my head.
'Yeah, so are you excited?' Lilly looked at me. 'What's wrong, why have you been crying?'
At this point everyone took time to stop and stare at me to find out for themselves that I had been crying.
'I haven't been crying,' I lied.
'Yeah, then why are your eyes all puffy and red?' Thanks Lil, way to be supportive if I had been crying, which I had, so, in short, way to be supportive.
'Allergies.' I could feel my nostrils flaring.
'We live in New York City. I really don't think that there is a lot of pollen in the air.'
'Well then I guess it's the smog.'
'You have most likely been in this smog-free limo for the past 15 minutes, I don't think that that is it.'
UGH! DOES SHE HAVE TO QUESTION EVERY LIE THAT COMES OUT OF MY MOUTH???
She looked around and smile came across her face.
Does she really get this much pleasure out of torturing me.
Is this the only reason that she is my friend???
'Where's Kenny?'
'He... well...'
I glanced around at everyone, leaving my eyes a fraction longer on Michael. I really didn't want to discuss this, especially with him in the car. But I might as well get it over with, they were all probably going to find out anyway, whether it was me, Kenny's big mouth, or the Post.
'It's over between me and Kenny.' I looked around, and maybe I was just being really stupid but I think I might have saw Michael smiling a little bit.
'Well, what happend?'
Must she know every SINGLE TINY detail??? I really wouldn't mind telling her, but I don't feel like telling everyone.
'It just didn't work out.'
'Did he break up with you or did you break up with him?'
I glanced around again and saw that Michael was staring strait at me.
I looked down.
'I broke up with him.'
'WHAT?' Lilly screamed making me jump. 'Then why are you crying?'
'Lilly I really don't feel like talking about it.' I looked over and saw that Michael had a really happy look on his face. Maybe that's how he stands living with her. He ignores her shrieking and thinks of a happy place.
'I really don't see why you broke up with him. I mean after going on and on and on about how 'I want a boyfriend, I need a boyfriend, I am such a loser because I don't have a boyfriend,' and you BREAK UP with him?'
Judith took this time to speak up. 'Well, I always thought the two of you made a really cute couple. But since you are now out there looking again and having a boyfriend means that much to you, I'm SURE I could find you somebody.'
I know that she is probably just trying to be nice, but I shot her a death glare that even I, the Algebra struggling, talentless freak that I am would have noticed. Unfortunately she didn't.
Thank God Michael spoke up though.
'I really don't think that Mia needs any help finding anyone, I mean, she just broke up with Kenny. Besides, I really don't think that it is any of our business.'
'Thank you, Michael,' I smiled at him and for some reason his face turned red and he looked away. He's probably embarrassed that he spoke up for me, such a loser, in front of his great fruit fly cloning girlfriend.
'There is someone else isn't there, Mia?' Lilly added.
I looked to the floor feeling my face burn.
'Well Mia, tell us, who is it?'
'No one.'
'Please tell me it isn't Josh Richter again!'
Michael looked up at me again, anger visible on his face. He was probably really annoyed that we were still discussing my pathetic love life.
'Lilly, can we please stop talking about this?' I was begging.
'Fine Mia, but I will not let you make the same mistake twice.'
'Lilly, I do not, nor will I ever again, have any sort of romantic feelings for the pathetic loser jerk Josh Richter, ok? Happy?'
Lilly might not have looked happy, but Michael seemed to be, it must be that he was sensing Lilly would change the topic back to the party that we were heading to.
All of this horrible stuff happened BEFORE the party, just imagine how bad it was when we got there and it became worse.
Mia's POV
This party totally sucks. I am not even joking. But then again it completely sucked even before I got here. Besides all of the things that are wrong with me that I really don't feel like thinking about right now, tonight Kenny topped the list. Yeah, I know he is my boyfriend, but he is a really crappy one. Sure, I am not the greatest girlfriend in the world, what with the whole me not letting him kiss me and the whole I am in love with my best friends brother thing, but here is what happened before we reached Josh Richter's Apartment, (yes, Jock Richter's, I will explain later).
He tried to feel me up! HE tried to place HIS HANDS under MY shirt!
IN FRONT OF LARS!
What kind of person DOES that??? WHO??
And besides, what did he think he was going to find under there anyway? I could have told him that it would be a total disappointment, IF I HAD BEEN EXPECTING IT!
But I mean, WHY would he think that I would want his hands on an area of my body that no one except my mother and the doctor who delivered me has seen, (oh, and anyone who might have seen me that time that I went streaking at Lilly's when she dared me)??? I don't even let him kiss me! Doesn't he think that before he goes placing his hands in places like that, we should have frenched kissed first?
Let me tell you that when he did this, I didn't take to kindly to it. I mean, I'm sitting there in the limo letting him kiss my cheek and then all of the sudden, BAM, there goes his HAND! What I did next was a complete accident, well not really an accident more of a reaction, that I am kind of sorry for if he is never able to have kids, but then again he completely deserved it.
I kicked him. Yes, I kicked him, and I will give you three guesses where, but the first two don't count.
'WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING???' I said, glancing over at Lars who I noticed was settling back into his seat, and I'm not sure, but I think that he might have been trying to hold back a laugh because his eyes began to water and he started to cough.
'...Mia... I thought th..at... well... that since we were alone...' he said bending over and gasping for breath. Have I ever said how much I love my combat boots???
'ALONE???? DO YOU NOT SEE ANOTHER PERSON IN THE CAR???!!! AND EVEN IF THERE WEREN'T'
Kenny sat up finally, red faced from what was either lack of oxygen or embarrassment.
'You mean that even if Lars hadn't been in here, you wouldn't have...'
'OF COURSE NOT! I DON'T EVEN LIKE YOU!' Ok, so I really didn't mean to say that last part, but I couldn't really help it. Whether he deserved to know the truth or not, I deserve not having to worry about having a perv- o for a boyfriend.
I pushed a little button to let down the glass between us and the driver.
'Could you please stop the limo??'
'Of course Princess,' he replied. The glass moved back up.
I thought of Grandmere and put on the scariest look I could think of, minus the drawn on eyebrows, and said in that calm creepy voice that she uses when she is really angry, minus the cigarette inflicted rasp.
'Kenny, could you please remove yourself from the limo?'
'But Mia... I didn't..'
'If you aren't able to remove yourself, should I ask Lars if he could be so kind as to assist you?' The voice must have really worked this time because he quickly got out of the car.
By this time it was one hundred percent sure that I didn't want to go to any lame party that Josh Richter and all of his jock friends and their cheerleader girlfriends were going to be at, but Lilly had asked me to go to help shoot for her very first show that had been picked up by NBC. It is supposed to reveal how beer companies target teenagers and try to make them believe that getting falling down drunk will make them 'popular'. She is also using it as a way to show the American public exactly how vain and ignorant Josh and Lana are.
Plus Michael is going to be there.
How could I refuse Michael AND making a fool of Josh and Lana in front of the entire nation??
And ok, so obviously it wasn't going to be just Michael, Lilly, Lilly's camera, and I going to the party. The whole school had been invited because Josh was wanting to break some sort of Guinness Book World Record for the most people in a 10 x 15 room and with his parents away in Key West, or somewhere like that, he had the perfect opportunity. We probably still wouldn't have even been invited anyway if it had not been for Lilly volunteering her video camera to use as the proof to send in.
So Lilly, Shameeka, Ling Su, Boris, Tina, Kenny (ehh...), Michael and I were all going to go, to help support Lilly. Or at least that is what everybody said, but I think that they were all, just like me, pretty curious, about what goes on at parties like that.
So after crying in the limo for about five minutes, and having Lars cheer me up by promising he wouldn't tell Grandmere about what happened, because, after all he might end up out of a job seeing as I handled the situation pretty well all by myself, we showed up at the Moscovitz's to pick up Lilly and Michael and Boris.
Only it wasn't just Lilly, Michael and Boris. I might not be the greatest when it comes to Algebra, but I can count four silhouettes behind a dark limo glass.
When the door opened I finally figured out who the other person was. Judith Gershner.
Could this day GET any worse???
I would find out later that it could.
So they all slid into the limo, which when Judith did, I had this really overwhelming voice in my head that made me want to scream that 'YOU NEVER SLIDE INTO A CAR!' I realized that that probably would have been a total Grandmere move, so I decided not to.
Lilly started to buckle up and said 'I really hope you don't mind, but Michael and Judith were working on some computer club stuff and since she was coming to the party to we figured she might as well just ride with us.'
Sure... 'Computer Club Stuff'
Maybe it's just me, but I am thinking that it was the same 'Computer Club Stuff' that Kenny was trying to go over with me earlier. But I didn't say any of that.
I put on my most Princessy voice and said, 'Of course, it would be silly for her to have to find another ride.'
How silly would it be of me to push Judith out of the car? I added in my head.
'Yeah, so are you excited?' Lilly looked at me. 'What's wrong, why have you been crying?'
At this point everyone took time to stop and stare at me to find out for themselves that I had been crying.
'I haven't been crying,' I lied.
'Yeah, then why are your eyes all puffy and red?' Thanks Lil, way to be supportive if I had been crying, which I had, so, in short, way to be supportive.
'Allergies.' I could feel my nostrils flaring.
'We live in New York City. I really don't think that there is a lot of pollen in the air.'
'Well then I guess it's the smog.'
'You have most likely been in this smog-free limo for the past 15 minutes, I don't think that that is it.'
UGH! DOES SHE HAVE TO QUESTION EVERY LIE THAT COMES OUT OF MY MOUTH???
She looked around and smile came across her face.
Does she really get this much pleasure out of torturing me.
Is this the only reason that she is my friend???
'Where's Kenny?'
'He... well...'
I glanced around at everyone, leaving my eyes a fraction longer on Michael. I really didn't want to discuss this, especially with him in the car. But I might as well get it over with, they were all probably going to find out anyway, whether it was me, Kenny's big mouth, or the Post.
'It's over between me and Kenny.' I looked around, and maybe I was just being really stupid but I think I might have saw Michael smiling a little bit.
'Well, what happend?'
Must she know every SINGLE TINY detail??? I really wouldn't mind telling her, but I don't feel like telling everyone.
'It just didn't work out.'
'Did he break up with you or did you break up with him?'
I glanced around again and saw that Michael was staring strait at me.
I looked down.
'I broke up with him.'
'WHAT?' Lilly screamed making me jump. 'Then why are you crying?'
'Lilly I really don't feel like talking about it.' I looked over and saw that Michael had a really happy look on his face. Maybe that's how he stands living with her. He ignores her shrieking and thinks of a happy place.
'I really don't see why you broke up with him. I mean after going on and on and on about how 'I want a boyfriend, I need a boyfriend, I am such a loser because I don't have a boyfriend,' and you BREAK UP with him?'
Judith took this time to speak up. 'Well, I always thought the two of you made a really cute couple. But since you are now out there looking again and having a boyfriend means that much to you, I'm SURE I could find you somebody.'
I know that she is probably just trying to be nice, but I shot her a death glare that even I, the Algebra struggling, talentless freak that I am would have noticed. Unfortunately she didn't.
Thank God Michael spoke up though.
'I really don't think that Mia needs any help finding anyone, I mean, she just broke up with Kenny. Besides, I really don't think that it is any of our business.'
'Thank you, Michael,' I smiled at him and for some reason his face turned red and he looked away. He's probably embarrassed that he spoke up for me, such a loser, in front of his great fruit fly cloning girlfriend.
'There is someone else isn't there, Mia?' Lilly added.
I looked to the floor feeling my face burn.
'Well Mia, tell us, who is it?'
'No one.'
'Please tell me it isn't Josh Richter again!'
Michael looked up at me again, anger visible on his face. He was probably really annoyed that we were still discussing my pathetic love life.
'Lilly, can we please stop talking about this?' I was begging.
'Fine Mia, but I will not let you make the same mistake twice.'
'Lilly, I do not, nor will I ever again, have any sort of romantic feelings for the pathetic loser jerk Josh Richter, ok? Happy?'
Lilly might not have looked happy, but Michael seemed to be, it must be that he was sensing Lilly would change the topic back to the party that we were heading to.
All of this horrible stuff happened BEFORE the party, just imagine how bad it was when we got there and it became worse.