HK: Fun facts: I think I started this at least three years ago. The only thing I'm changing is the author's note. I'm not actually looking at what the previous fics (yes KinkyEyepatchShit and Hikari Mibu were kind enough to include me in an authoress-rampage against our favourite bishis) and no, I honestly have practically no recollection of what happened. I also just finished a reread of The Narrator's delightful rampage, Statistically Speaking. The long and the short of this? I'm an official adult, with access to both medication and alcohol, have grown precisely 0% less adoring of this series, and need to play with my beloved boys because I'm busy smutting Shinrei to oblivion in everything else I'm currently working on.
Shinrei: *paling significantly* You're… doing what?
HK: Shipping you with Akari. It's not going so well, though dear KinkyEyepatchShit has been a wonderful help. Love always to both you, dear, and Hikari Mibu, third member of the Authoress Doom Spiral, who also features in this fic!
Akira: I liked you better younger than me. You didn't abuse your power half as much.
HK: I liked you better naked, we all have regrets.
Disclaimer: HK still more than lacks any iota of the talent of storytelling that Akimine Kamijyo possesses, let alone artistic ability. Be pleased that she owns nothing but her own manic capabilities!
WARNINGS! Nothing much! Bad language, duct-tape-fu, a teensy tiny drop of smut~
owowowowowowowowowo
LAST TIME: "LIZ! DON'T SHOW SHINREI THAT!"
"Hey, a little smut never hurt anyone,"
"That's INCEST!"
"It's all good, basically the same thing!"
"Man, I need a tissue!"
"Here ya go, HK."
"Thanks a lot!"
"Oh Shinrei, don't faint! It's not that bad! Ya big pansy."
"Tell that to someone who hasn't just gotten a glance at smut involving him and his brother!"
"Hehehehe…"
"What are you cackling about?"
"…..Nothing. Don't worry about it."
"Now I have to worry."
"Make sure it's hot, and send me the first chapter right away! Mmkay HK?"
"You guys are…..Hm, on second thought; send me the first chap too."
"Welcome to the dark side, Hikari."
AND NOW:
HK spread her arms, grinning at the gang.
"And this, boys, is my house!" The group didn't look particularly impressed, although Shinrei appeared to be suffering from a nervous twitch. Pretending to be honestly concerned, Hikari patted him on the arm.
"You okay?" The most recent addition to the authoress crew, and current host, snickered wickedly behind her.
"Oh, I'm sure Shinny is just fine. He's just making sure he remembers the little trick I taught him, AREN'T YOU SHINREI." The silver haired Mibu flinched, but nodded quickly. Akira, who had finally given up on removing the pink dye from his hair (and therefore in a VERY BAD MOOD), shot the other redhead a glare.
"I don't know WHO you think you are, and I don't care. You can't intimidate me." HK paused, a very creepy smile crossing her face.
"I think some one's forgetting what happens when we disobey..." Liz frowned, leaning in curiously, unwilling to miss a second of Akira's impending doom. Which if she knew the other girl, was not going to be pretty.
"What kind of stuff did you to do them anyway?" All the evil in HK's face seemed to disappear as she shot her friend a beaming smile.
"You wanna see?" Bontenmaru immediately went slightly green.
"I don't think I wanna see what sick stuff you got up to..." In a flash, he was wrapped from head to foot in bright purple duct tape, and HK was sitting on him. With an oppressively fake sigh, she shook her head, grinning viciously.
"That's not a very open minded attitude Bon-chan... also if you try to murder my bathroom like you did Hikari and Liz's, very bad things will happen to you. Therefore if you need to go you're going in the woods, or I feed you to my dogs."
Kyo glanced up from his glaring at the ground then, for in his world "dog" immediately equated "Yuya" for no adequately explored reason. When he realised that no, there were no Yuyas in the vicinity, he went back to looking at the ground, ignoring everyone else. In the meantime, Akari leaned down to poke the duct taped Bon.
"That's an interesting technique HK-chan, how did you do it?" The authoress shrugged happily, having apparently forgotten that she was supposed to be visiting imminent doom.
"Duct-tape-fu is an ancient authoress art, Akari-chan! How else would we keep the boys in line?" Still curious, although now a little annoyed at her easily side-tracked friend, Liz reached over to poke HK.
"You were going to make Akira and Shinrei suffer for our amusement?" Shinrei, who had temporarily abandoned all dignity seeing what HK had done to Bon and therefore been trying to sneak away as subtly as possible, froze. Akira froze too, taking a few steps back.
"You can't control me! And you can't make me do anything I don't want to!" Lightning crackled in the air around HK as she stood, grinning maniacally.
"Oh really? I think thou hast forgotten with whom thou art fucking!" Rolling her eyes, Liz reached out again and smacked HK upside the head.
"Quit with the special effects and get on with the show!" Pouting now and rubbing her head, HK stuck her tongue out at her friend.
"Fine!" She turned, grinning again, and held out a whip to Akari. "Since you're my idol, I bestow upon you the power to control the speed of their dancing. Whip 'em if you want 'em to go faster!" A grin even more manic than HK's crossed the shaman's face, and at this point even Akira turned pale and tried to run, only to freeze in place as music started up.
Grimacing, obviously trying to stop himself and failing, the blind samurai began to move jerkily in Shinrei's direction. Hikari leaned over, frowning as the two approached each other, clearly not in control of their bodies.
"What exactly did you make them do?" HK grinned, turning up the volume on her CD player.
"I've been experimenting with subliminal impressioning. Kinda like mind control for lazy people. It's working so far!" Liz raised an eyebrow, slightly impressed.
"But how did you teach them to dance while they were duct taped up in a closet?" Suddenly HK's face was a complete blank.
"You need not know this fact." Hikari snickered, folding her arms as she watched Shinrei and Akira tango in circles around the group.
"That means she doesn't know either." Akari stretched the whip HK had given her between her hands, stroking it against her cheek.
"This is real leather... very professional!" Again, the manic grin crossed her face and she snapped the whip at Akira and Shinrei. "Dance faster, my little minions! Your queen bee grows bored!" Grimacing in a mixture of pain and hate, the pair sped up. Hotaru frowned quizzically, poking at the CD player.
"This makes them dance?" Hikari paused, poking Hotaru in return.
"That sounded almost relevant..." HK paled slightly, diving closer to knock Hotaru away from the CD player.
"Also do not touch that! Touching that is bad!" Unfortunately, in diving to remove Hotaru, she accidentally knocked over the CD player, causing the CD to fall out. She paused, sweat dropping down at
it. "Cursed irony."
Then she froze, as did the rest of the group as two very murderous auras made themselves known.
Apparently the moment the music stopped, Shinrei and Akira were freed from their programming. The two samurai loomed over the authoress, who let out a squeak of fright and jammed the CD back into the player. The music started up again almost at once, and Shinrei jerked.
The programming seemed to work significantly faster on him, probably since he was so used to being programmed. Akira almost managed to get his hands around HK's neck before the music took effect and he was forced away. The teenager breathed a sigh of relief, getting back to her feet slowly and glaring at her friends. "Next time, do you think maybe someone could step in before the attempted murder?" Liz snickered.
"What do you mean? It looked like you had it under control." The redhead pouted, sticking her tongue out at her.
"Yeah, whatever. See if I send you that smut now." Immediately Liz was contrite, actually ignoring the now waltzing boys.
"I'm sorry! I wouldn't have let him actually kill you…"
"Much…" Hikari put in. Akari gave them both sceptical smirks.
"Like either of you could stop them." Liz half turned, pointing to Akari.
"What she said! Come on, don't cheap out on me now! After all we've been through!" HK sweat dropped.
"The most we've been through is waiting years for one of us to update. Admittedly I'm not blameless." Hikari rolled her eyes, smirking.
"We know. And we know you'd never deny us some good smut." HK sighed dramatically, grinning.
"Alright, you have a point. Shall we go inside? Oh, and someone has to keep Akira and Shinrei from murdering me when I turn the music off. I really should have thought of this during the conditioning stage…"Liz giggled, walking over and prodding Bontenmaru with her foot.
"Just ask Hikari to grope Shinrei for you, he'll be distracted…" HK contemplated this for a while.
"This leaves me with the problem of Akira… Hey Kyo, be a bro?" Hikari, who had flushed bright red at the "Molest Shinrei" plan, decided not to bother arguing and simply giggled.
"That rhymed." Kyo gave both girls a flat look, clearly indicating what he thought of the whole situation.
"No, I am not going to molest Akira for your entertainment." The girls pouted, but Akari nodded vigorously.
"Damn right he isn't! If anyone gets to molest Kyo, it's me!" HK sighed in a very put upon manner, taking out her roll of duct tape.
"Then I suppose I'll have to fend for myself. Someone cut Bon free so we don't have to drag him inside, I'll handle this." She prodded the CD player with her foot, causing it to shut off. At once Akira and Shinrei leapt away from each other, and HK blurred. Akira, like Bon, was now cocooned in duct tape.
Shinrei stared incredulously down at his former dance partner, then backed a few steps away from the evilly grinning girl who stood over him. Really, why was HK afraid of retribution? Half the time the boys forgot how easily they could take the girls apart. HK glanced over her shoulder, grinning at Hikari.
"Hikari, if you want him come and get him! Because you know how tempting I find him to kidnap." Hikari paused for a moment, pretending to consider things. Then she beamed sweetly, taking Shinrei by the hand.
"Come on!" It seemed innocent enough, and Shinrei was about to yank his hand away and below something about the Mibu's pride when he caught sight of Akira again. Really… it could be far worse. And Hikari was the only one who bothered with any kind of subtlety.
Clenching his jaw, he forced a nod, heading up the hill to the large blue door that HK was holding open. The redhead was ~snickering~ at him, but she was also holding that damnable roll of duct tape… Instead he held himself tall and proud, quietly wished destruction on that equally damnable CD player, and accompanied Hikari into a rather large, spacious, house. And promptly stopped dead.
"WHAT THE HELL IS HE DOING HERE?!" Not something that the usually composed samurai was prone to, but then, instead of a house he had been expecting some form of sex dungeon. Certainly not a rather pleasant sitting room, a large tv, and Sanada Yukimura curled contentedly on a squishy green couch.
Yukimura was… problematic at the best of times, and would very much enjoy teasing Shinrei just under regular circumstances. Finding him in company with the authoress made a truly horrible kind of sense. HK snickered, rolling Akira through the door as Liz piloted a mildly amused Hotaru further into the house. Yukimura beamed that cat like smile at the group, waving as if this was the most normal thing in the world.
"Why, I'm simply visiting my dear bartender! HK makes me the most wonderful cocktails." Since this sounded like alcohol, it was the first thing Kyo had heard in a long time that he actually liked. He shot a narrow eyed glance at the beaming redhead, then turned his attention to Yukimura. He had learned the hard way that escape was unlikely, and the couch looked comfortable. So he sat, crossing his legs and doing his best to ignore Akari, who had plopped herself down between them and was cosying up to Kyo, her legs draped in Yukimura's lap.
Yukimura made no sign of objecting, and Bon dropped himself onto the opposite couch with a grunt. By now he knew that the best he could hope for was that the authoresses would be busy with the younger men, leaving him free to watch and be amused. After all, the great Bontenmaru-sama had no objections to upstarts like Akira and Shinrei being taken down a peg. The only thing that would be better would be…
"Hey, Yukimura, where's that Sasuke kid? Shouldn't he be here to keep an eye on you?" Bon didn't even bother trying for innocence. Not one person in the room would believe it. Yukimura simply giggled, raising a glass that was half full of something violently purple.
"He's on the roof, Bon-chan! None of the Ten will come inside whilst HK-chan is conscious." Which was, Bon had to admit, almost definitely the wiser course. It was rather a shame though… less cannon fodder between himself and the manic girls.
Hotaru had stopped just inside the room again, staring blankly at Yukimura as though trying to decide who exactly he was. Liz was still trying to push him further in, but was being completely ignored. HK dropped Akira on the floor at the foot of the couch that Hikari was leading a rather grumpy Shinrei to (the water user doing his damnedest to pretend he couldn't see Yukimura; to this point, everyone who knew anyone he cared about had suffered at the very least equal humiliations, and so wouldn't say a word. Yukimura ~couldn't~ be humiliated. He was doomed), and turned a grin on Liz.
"Oh, that reminds me! I had a present for you!" She dashed over, a wicked smile on her lips, and was back in seconds holding up a collar and leash. "For Hotaru! To keep him from getting lost." Akira was yelling something muffled through his duct tape gag, probably to do with the honour of the Four Emperors and Hotaru not daring to wear such a thing. He was also summarily ignored, as Liz grabbed the leash, beaming.
"It's perfect! Stay still, Hotaru!" The collar was a clip on, and easy to affix around his neck. Of course, Liz was far too polite and refined a young lady to be so rude as to not to immediately use a gift. Hotaru glanced down at the collar for a second, and those ditzy eyes narrowed briefly. The room quieted, Akira, Bon and Shinrei hoping that just maybe, the fire user might be inclined to finally help them escape. Then the fire user shrugged.
"I like red." He offered no resistance as the girl clasped the collar around his neck, and indeed obediently followed her as she tugged at the leash, leading him down into the sitting room.
There were only two chairs left now, a large red arm chair, and a hanging wicker cradle large enough for two people, with a bright red cushion. Calculation took over Liz's face for a moment; in the arm chair, she could sit in Hotaru's lap. In the hanging nest-chair, she could snuggle up against him. The choice was obvious, and she tugged Hotaru towards the hanging chair.
"You get in first, Hotaru-chan!" She steadied the side of the chair to help, because she was a very sweet, generous, and wonderful human being, who would never do anything not to the benefit of others. HK dropped herself into the armchair, grinning around the room.
"If you're both sitting in it, one of you has to keep their feet on the ground. Otherwise it tips." Safety tips were clearly not in the forefront of Shinrei's mind, as his temper finally boiled over, once more leading him into trouble.
"Keikoku! Have you no pride?! Allowing yourself to be collared like a dog!"
"Or a bondage slave," put in a cheerfully grinning Liz, hopping into the chair beside Hotaru and tucking her legs up. Hotaru stared blankly at his half-brother for a second, then smirked. Bon groaned, picking up on the younger man's logic at once.
"Really? Ya put it on to upset Shinrei?" In all honesty, he knew it wasn't a question. Hotaru loved getting a reaction from Shinrei almost as much as the authors, more so if it was compared against his normal apathy. Shinrei was heating up for a full on Mibu Pride And Honour rant, and HK rooooooolled her eyes, kicking her legs over the arm of her chair.
"Shut him up, Hikari, or we can't even hear ourselves think!" The quieter author paused, glancing up at Shinrei. Unlike Liz and HK, she… sorta… respected his boundaries. Enough to at least be nicer to him. But she was still an authoress, complete with nigh-omnipotence and a tendency to be easily amused. A sweet smile crossed her lips.
"You should do what she says, Shinrei, or she might make us play spin the bottle." Innocence was ~not~ getting a place in this room today, as Liz, HK, Yukimura and Akari all brightened simultaneously.
"What an ~excellent~ idea, Hikari-chan!" Yukimura enthused, clasping his hands together. Kyo narrowed his eyes, but did nothing, as Akari beamed up at him, surrounded by sparkles. Even Bontenmaru gave a reluctant chuckle.
"Hell, we might as well play Spin Akira if you're gonna leave him tied up like that." The blind boy glowered, and a spike of ice shot from his bound form towards Bontenmaru, only to be shattered.1 HK rolled herself out of her chair, cackling delightedly.
"Oh no Bon-chan! Akira's going to play too! We just need Kyo to empty a bottle for us." Now, depending on how well you knew HK, and her mood at the time, this could be either Extremely Ominous or Extremely Promising. Kyo took a glance at Yukimura's glass of purple, and decided to hope for Promising.
And for once, he was in luck, as the girl returned a few minutes later with her arms full of alcohol, a stack of glasses balanced on top of her head. She thrust a green glass bottle at Kyo, grinning widely.
"The only sake in the house, for grumpy guts! Chug it whilst I mix everyone else drinks." Liz leaned forward in her seat, grinning.
"Are you sure that's a good idea, HK?" Not because Liz thought it wasn't; because she didn't want to be blamed later if the house burned down. HK simply laughed, dumping the rest of the bottles on the floor and dropping to sit behind them.
"Nope! Now who wants a drink first? Oh, and someone let Akira out. Our ice machine is broken." Akira squirmed like a distinctly angry caterpillar, though because he didn't want to play spin the bottle, because he didn't like being an ice machine, or because he didn't like being tied up was anyone's guess.
Bon did the honours, reaching down to pull the duct tape off the bound samurai, who surged to his feet and opened his mouth to begin a tirade – only to stop suddenly. HK was holding her roll of duct tape again, a sweet smile on her lips. Furious in the face of his impotence, Akira got some minor revenge by stealing the girl's chair. He folded his arms, doing his very best not to pout.
Like Shinrei, he had realized that Yukimura's presence meant that this particular episode might end up being broadcasted far and wide. Bontenmaru was making the grave mistake of beginning to relax, leaning back and tossing an arm across the back of the couch, and coincidentally Shinrei's shoulders.
"Make me a drink, kid! Make it strong." There should have been a thunder crack. Lightning should have flashed through the room, inside or not.2 Instead, all there was was a deceptively sweet smile on the girl's lips as she reached for a very, VERY large mug.
"Oh, I'll make it strong, Bon-chan!" She knew very well that sake was top of the alcoholic range for brews like wine or beer; she also knew that 15-16% alcohol content was at the very bottom of the range for the booze she possessed. No girl with an Irish alcohol tolerance would happily start below 20%. Liz's grin widened as she picked up on the sense of impending doom.
"Do you have vodka3?" HK smiled sweetly at her shoulder, taking another dark green bottle, similar to the one she had given Kyo, from the pile.
"In half a dozen flavours, if you wanna look?" She nodded at the pile, and Liz leaned forward with an eager grin… completely forgetting that the hanging chair was prone to tipping. At that same moment, Hotaru leaned back, raising his legs from the floor, and the ball came crashing down, nearly hitting Akira, who would Never Not Ever admit to the extremely high pitched shriek that escaped him. Not that Akari would ever let him forget it.
Liz groaned, rolling out of the ball (and noticing that none of her companions, the bastards, had bothered to ask if she was okay), and dragged herself to the stash of bottles. Hotaru looked mildly surprised by this development, but didn't bother getting out of the chair.
"Ooooh… marshmallow vodka? What's that like?" She picked up the clear bottle curiously, glancing at the other girl. HK was grinning, pouring out a thick, dark green liquid into the very large glass.
"It smells like antiseptic, but tastes like magic! And it doesn't burn going down." This was a big factor for HK, who disliked booze-burn. It was less a concern for Bon, who laughed at the very idea.
"Must be pretty weak stuff!" Honestly, he should have known better. Apparently he still didn't. HK turned, poking Akira in the shin with a toe, holding up the glass.
"May I have an ice cube or three for Bon-chan?" He wasn't taken in for an instant by that cyanide-sweet smile, or tone, and was about to refuse on principle… but something stopped him. Bon had been laughing at him rather too much today, and for HK to be so calm and cheerful in the wake of his attitude meant that something entertaining was going to happen.
Instead he nodded gruffly, focusing his ice powers until three cubes of ice dropped into the glass. Bon laughed and made some comments about him being a whipped dog, but HK was still smiling, her fingers drumming innocently on the bottle. Too innocently. He had no idea what it was, but he got the strong impression that whatever it was, wasn't safe.
The girl smiled sweetly, sniffing the glass as though to check the contents, then held it out to Bontenmaru. "Drink up! I have plenty more!" She had already turned to the next glass by the time Bontenmaru had taken it and began chugging the drink inside, probably in subconscious reaction to show that he wasn't cowed by the aura of danger. Liz leaned in closer, curious, and whispered in HK's ear.
"What have you given him?" She'd noticed that the average alcohol content of the collection was between 30-40% alcohol; she may not know exactly how sake stacked up to that, but knowing HK, she could guess. The other authoress grinned at her, leaning in to whisper back.
"Absinthe. I'd have set it on fire first, to burn off enough alcohol that he wouldn't have hallucinations, but no one's mean to Akira-chan but me." Akira, being the only person in the room with hearing sharp enough to catch that anyway, narrowed his eyes in irritation before the full meaning came through. Alcohol strong enough to cause… hallucinations? And Bontenmaru was chugging it.
He half smiled to himself, cupping his chin gently. He probably was ~not~ going to be drinking whatever HK gave him. The girl was looking around the room again, narrowing her eyes in thought. Kyo was obediently chugging the sake, apparently under the impression that it could only help to be a little drunk for what was to come.
Wise man, Demon Eyes Kyo.
Abruptly she grinned, snatching up another glass. "I'm gonna make everyone a drink based on their personalities!" Was this a physically reasonable idea? Well, not really. Was it a fun one? Yup. She began more slowly this time, pouring three kinds of alcohol into a glass so that they layered one on top of the other.
But when she was done, she put it off to one side, not giving it to anyone. Instead, she gave Shinrei a very, very dangerous grin. "I'm making you a water lily!" Shinrei's eyes narrowed, and he leaned forward to yell at the girl.
"Will you stop comparing me to that damn flower?!" His reply, however, came not from HK herself, but from Hikari and Liz.
"Nope!" The two called in unison. HK nodded brightly, already pouring lemon juice, gin, triple sec, and crème de violettes into a glass. She seemed to be measuring things by eye, and the pint glass was rather full by the time she was done.
Shinrei took it somewhat tentatively… it smelled nice enough, but unlike Bontenmaru, he was very, very wary of anything the girl gave him. Hikari gave him an encouraging grin, and he took a tentative sip. He blinked in surprise, raising the glass to give its delicately purple contents (a few shade lighter than Yukimura's concoction) a startled look.
"This is quite delicious!" He sounded surprised too, which made the girl pout.
"Yeah, that's a shocker. I master duct-tape-fu and subliminal control, but drink mixing would be beyond me." She rolled her eyes, and Hikari leaned over, prodding the glass in Shinrei's hand.
"Can I try a little?" Liz and HK exchanged grins which contained their opinions of just how many things Hikari might like to try with Shinrei, but the samurai did his best to ignore them. Say what you like, Shinrei was good at observing power structures, and he was rather hoping that having Hikari on his side might save him from humiliation.
Ha.
HK returned her attention to the glass she had apparently forgotten, picking it up and testing the temperature of the side with the back of one hand before nodding cheerfully.
"Okay, this one's ready for Hotaru!" But instead of handing it over, she produced a match box, and lit the drink on fire. Liz was only mildly surprised, given the previous references to flaming drinks and HK's unstoppable pyromania, but none of them were quite prepared for Hotaru to calmly take the drink, and pour it down his throat, fire and all.
Liz, Hikari, HK, Akari and Shinrei all cried out in surprise, Liz and HK reaching forward as if to pull it back. Hotaru swallowed, and looked at them all, completely blasé about the whole experience.
"It's nice. Can I have another?" Even his voice sounded the same as normal, and after a long moment, Liz burst out laughing.
"You were soooooo worried, Shinrei!" And just like that, attention shifted to the silver haired samurai, laughter breaking out throughout the room.
"Yeah," Yukimura chimed in, laughing and leaning forward with his arms crossed on top of Akari's legs, "you're really just a big softy around Hotaru, aren't you Shinrei-chan!" Hotaru watched with mild surprise as the room descended into teasing and grinning, the divisions seeming to be Shinrei vs Liz, Hikari, Akari, Akira, Bon, Yukimura and HK, with Kyo focusing himself on the job HK had given him, finishing the full sake bottle.
He leaned forward, poking HK in the shoulder.
"I said can I have another?"
owo
Within a few hours, everyone had been supplied with at least one drink by HK (Akira wisely sticking to sips with the authoresses). Shinrei had apparently decided that Kyo might have the right idea for a change, and had chugged the rest of his water lily, apparently hoping for the buzz of alcohol to preserve his dignity.
Given that they were now several hours into playing spin the bottle, this was ~not~ going as hoped. Akari had shown a truly divine mastery of the bottle, managing to land on Kyo, Yukimura, and Shinrei exclusively (though Kyo and Yukimura got the majority of her attentions).
Bontenmaru kept having his turn "innocently" skipped by HK, who had positioned herself after him, but eight large glasses of absinthe in, he was swaying visibly and talking to people who didn't exist. The turn skipping had actually begun early on, when Bontenmaru's first spin had landed on Kyo, and Akira and Akari had managed to shout over each other so effectively that no one knew what either had been saying.
This was basically the ideal outcome from Akira's point of view. The girls were teasing him anyway, and Yukimura seemed to have mysteriously acquired a notebook. Fortunately the samurai had been drinking before they arrived, and had continued on cheerfully accepting every single drink HK made for him, so with any luck, his writing would be indecipherable.
Back to the game, however, Hikari had also proven herself to be deceptively sneaky, having calculated the weight of the bottle and the friction of the carpet so that every spin landed on Shinrei. HK and Liz, who were playing "fair" and letting the bottle land where it may, were laughing their asses off every time this happened, though the increasingly blurry Shinrei seemed to have no objections.
Indeed, it was his turn now, and he was having rather a lot of trouble actually catching the bottle to spin it. He kept hitting it with the back of his hands, or the tips of his fingers, instead of getting it into place. Akari was laughing uproariously both at the show, and the mumbled swearwords and curses Shinrei was bestowing on the poor sake bottle.
A rather large number of them seemed to involve its heritage, though Shinrei had enough of himself left to realize that the heritage of a glass bottle was sand, and therefore was calling it variants on "sedimentary trash".
Apparently high alcohol content did nothing to harm his vocabulary, or his understanding of the sciences.
HK was laughing so hard that she'd keeled over, and was shaking from head to toe, utterly helpless. Akira wasted a moment wondering about using this opportunity to get some revenge; it was probably the best chance he'd ever get. But he was a little buzzed too, and rather enjoying himself watching Shinrei.
And he couldn't find his katanas. He'd find them later.
Finally Liz, with a wicked grin on her lips, leaned forward to push the bottle under Shinrei's reaching hand.
"Is that better, Shin-chan?" The samurai was so far gone that he gave her a kawaii smile, almost the same innocent smile his much younger self had given to Demon Eyes Kyo back in the Mibu jail. It was so sweet and pretty that HK and Hikari sobered up in an instant, both complaining loudly at the unfairness of the situation.
Liz shut them both up with a look, before returning her attention to Shinrei. "Now you spin it, remember?" Shinrei nodded again, still beaming with that blissful happiness. He clumsily spun the bottle, not noticing Liz's eyes fixed on it, and her finger ready to pounce.
The bottle began to slow… and the authoress struck! Shinrei looked blearily along the bottle to his half-brother, Hotaru, who frowned almost sleepily. Shinrei pulled himself from the couch, though he wasn't balanced enough to stay on his feet, and instead fell to hands and knees.
This worked out quite well, because Hotaru hadn't yet bothered to get out of the fallen hanging chair, so they were about on even footing. The room quieted as Shinrei began to crawl across to Hotaru, his expression one of fixed determination.
All three authoresses didn't bother to disguise their intense ~interest~, and even Akari was almost holding her breath in anticipation. Yukimura was watching too, a curious little smile on his lips. Amused? Aroused? It was far too difficult to guess what was going through that pretty head.
Hotaru's legs were extended out in front of him on the floor, his upper body curled along the inside of the nest-chair. Shinrei had apparently decided that moving them out of the way was far too much work, so instead he was in effect crawling up his brother's body, his breath coming out a little ragged between the drink and the exertion.
Hotaru's eyes sharpened for a brief instant, recognizing Shinrei, then returned to their usual distant expression. All three authoresses leaned closer, holding their breath as the distance between the brothers closed… Closed…
And Hotaru swung his fist, punching Shinrei in the top of the head.
owowowowowowowo
HK: The End! ^^
Shinrei: I HATE YOU.
HK: You'd prefer I leave it as a steamy makeout scene? I can totally do that!
Shinrei: *snatching away the laptop!* NO YOU CANNOT YOU HAVE DONE ENOUGH! MORE THAN ENOUGH!
HK: *pouty* not yet I haven't! I'm already late! Oh, and this was just a little super fast scribble to finally fulfill my promise. I miiiiiight write out the full Spin the Bottle episode into another chapter. ^^ If I do, it'll be another long time. Sorry it's not very good, but I needed to release my silly genes! ^^
Akira: Oh, you apologise to ~them~.
HK: I ~like~ them. I tried using breaks and so on to delineate this, but since FUCKED A DINOSAUR it won't accept anything pretty. That happened.
1Why wasn't the ice being used on the duct tape? Because it was Canadian duct tape, which is ice proof.
2It didn't, but only because a certain lightning-aligned shinobi was on the roof, watching for foreshadowing.
3Vodka tends to be around 40% alcohol, and come in delightful flavours. Authoress recommends.