A/N: Don't ask me where I got this idea because, honesltly, I don't even know. I actually hate this song. Lol, Enjoy
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter :( Or 3OH!3 (thank God.)
Neville was scared to death. He never really wanted to do this in the first place, it was all very un- Neville-ish to just stand up in front of the entire school and sing about who he really was. He hated Dumbledore for coming up with this stupid idea in the first place. I mean what's the point of an all school Karaoke night that everyone has to come to? To embarass all of those who are forced to enter, well, apparently.
Dumbledore stepped up to the microphone. "Welcome to school-wide karaoke night!" Everyone in the Great Hall erupted into applause and laughter, knowing they were in for an interesting night. "First up is Neville Longbottom!"
This is it. Neville thought. He shyly approached the microphone as the opening notes played, those who recognized the song started giggling, while those who didn't waited in anticipation.
Black dress with the tights underneath,
I got the breath of the last cigarette on my teeth,
And shes an actress (actress),
But she ain't got no need.
Shes got money from her parents in a trust fund back east.
Thats when most people started to realize the perverted, highly obnoxious muggle song he was singing. Fortunately for Neville, Luna didn't... yet.
T-t-t-tongues always pressed to your cheeks,
While my tongue is on the inside of some other girls teeth,
T-tell your boyfriend if he says hes got beef,
That I'm a vegetarian and I ain't f***ing scared of him.
Then, as if by instint Neville looked at Hannah Abbot and Luna at the same time. They were obviously not happy about Neville's song choice. But he didn't care. He kept singing as if he didn't notice what just happened
She wants to touch me (Woah),
She wants to love me (Woah),
She'll never leave me (Woah, woah, oh, oh),
Don't trust a ho,
Never trust a ho,
Won't trust a ho,
Won't trust me.
Now everyone in the Great Hall was disturbed. Who was this and what had he done to Neville? Right then, Fred and George thought if would be funny if they told his Gran what he was doing.
X's on the back of your hands,
Wash them in the bathroom to drink like the bands.
And your setlist (setlist),
You stole off the stage,
Had red and purple lipstick all over the page.
B-b-b-bruises cover your arms,
Shaking in the fingers with the bottle in your palm.
And the best is (best is),
No one knows who you are,
Just another girl alone at the bar.
All of a sudden Gran apparated into Hogwarts while Hermione just stared at her stone faced for breaking a huge rule. She just stood there for a moment and then, she started dancing, yes, dancing... to her grandson singing to 3OH!3 of all things. Everyone in the Great Hall went silent, including Neville. He just stood there, disturbed by his Gran's actions, and nervoiously muttered "Um... bye." And exited the stage as quickly as possible.
Then Dumbledore came on, casually, as if nothing happened.
"That was wonderful Neville." He calmly stated, while everyone still was in a daze, confuzed by what had just happened.
Suddenly snapping back into reality, the students in the audience thought If this is just the beginning. I wonder what's next?
A/N: Hahaha. I hope you are disturbed. Next up is Draco. Muahahaha.