Salt Shakers, Plungers, and Water Towers

The TARDIS shook violently as she carried her passengers to their desired destination. One man was at the controls, with wild dark hair, a grin and an eye for adventure, he used his foot which wore a bright red cross trainer to kick one of the levers that controlled the TARDIS (That is Time And Relative Dimension In Space).

His companion held onto her station for dear life, but she was grinning.

"Now then Donna," declared the man. "Where shall we go to next? Ah, how about Ringloffstottenmire? Quite a lovely place, that is. They have dogs that are as big as horses, horses as small as dogs, and the cuisine is absolutely elegant. Although their tableside manners aren't the best (they eat so very loud, you know) but they do love it when visitors come."

Donna Noble laughed. The Doctor had taken her on a marvelous adventure at one space station where someone he had helped in the past (or the future?) owed him, so they were able to get a free tour of a few of the nearby planets, and Donna had been pampered so much, she mightn't have wanted to leave. But the promise of adventure was too great with the Doctor, and Donna was more than happy with the new clothes she had gotten. She could more than easily pass for a socialite back home in England.

The Doctor continued to ramble, and was now speaking of another planet that had humanoid talking dogs. "But don't ever let them see a cat of any sort, because then all common sense is gone from them."

"How about that one planet with the people who have those really long necks?" Donna suggested. The Doctor smiled at her. "But of course!"

He was setting the course, and was telling Donna to push this button and that button. When he stopped and stared at the screen consol. "No, no, no, no… that can't be right…"

"Doctor," Donna said, her face giving away her concern. "What's wrong?"

Her question was answered when a screeching robotic voice announced, "YOU WILL BE EXTERMINATED AT ONCE DOCTOR!"

"Daleks…" the Doctor said, mostly to himself. His voice sounded grave and his face almost pale. He was quite angry, and Donna was worried. When the Doctor grew quiet like this, it meant that the rage he often masked was about to be unleashed.

The Doctor eyed the screen, which showed a small Dalek ship. He quickly ran a few scans, and discovered that there were five Daleks on the opposing ship. Although he hated the Daleks, he at least had to be merciful so that he would not be ranked in with the likes of a war-loving Dalek.

"I'll give you one chance to leave," said the Doctor. He did not have a plan, but since when did he have a plan? He usually found it was best to ride out the situation, and work from there. "And I will not destroy your ship." He added, and he made sure not to look at Donna for the moment, because he did not want to scare her. He had to protect Donna, and make sure that she got home safe. He did not want to face Sylvia or Wilfred. If something happened out here, Donna was far away, and in another time. It would not be fair to any of them that Donna was so far away, and the Doctor could never return her home. He could not afford to think like that.

"Everything is going to be alright, won't it?" Donna asked.

Before the Doctor could respond, the TARDIS shook violently; not because they were moving, but because the Daleks were shooting some sort of beam at them. The voice came onto the screen once again, "THE DALEKS WILL NOT SURRENDER! IT IS FOOLISH TO THINK THAT WE, THE SUPREME DALEKS WOULD EVER SURRENDER! YOU WILL NOT LIVE TO SEE ANOTHER DAY, DOCTOR!"

There was an explosion, and an odd crack began to form beside the two ships, and began to suck both of the ships in. The Doctor and Donna began to feel strange as the TARDIS got closer to the crack. Their bodies had a strange tingling sensation, almost like bugs crawling underneath their skin. Then it started to hurt. Both of them collapsed to the floor of the TARDIS, and they were curled up because of the pain.

Outside in the vortex, strange colors surrounded them, such as yellows, reds, and blues. Loud, strange, distorted humming reached them, and it didn't help because now their heads and ears were hurting. The TARDIS shook once more and finally crashed. The Doctor and Donna both had passed out from the intense pain, and laid motionless on the floor of the TARDIS.


Back on the Dalek ship, we need to go back a ways. A few days before all of this took place. Five Daleks had survived for as long as they had by hiding and recovering from a very violent previous encounter with the Doctor.

Dalek Troy, Dalek Kahn, Dalek Han, Dalek Kun, and their leader, Dalek Kath had made their way to one lonely little town to find a man who claimed he had a secret weapon that could destroy anything, and he was willing to sale. Now, many people in the small town avoided this man, because of how odd and zany he was. And anyone who looked up the secret weapon that he claimed he had, all thought it was a rather amusing and annoying joke.

Dalek Troy and Dalek Han had been sent to retrieve this weapon, because Dalek Kath believed that it could be used to destroy the Doctor once and for all, ensuring Dalek victory. The man lived on a hill, far away from the main part of town, so he was pretty much left alone. People who had old cars and other useless junk often either sold it to him or just dumped it into his yard to add to the stacks that surrounded the small house. It was patched together with wood, car parts, other scraps of metal, and whatever else would fit the job that needed to be done. It was quite possible that none of the original house was left. Dalek Troy and Han made their way to the door, and shot it down.

A man came out from one of the rooms, and yelled, "Rotten kids, messing with my machines!"

He ignored the two Daleks and went for a toaster and began to push a few buttons that had been modified to the toaster. There was a distant explosion, and he laughed, one of his eyes twitching. "Come back and let me improve my aim!"

He then turned to the Daleks, who just observed the man with some interest. There had not been any children of the sort, so something or nothing had been the victim of an explosion. He had wild, matted hair, almost like he had been electrocuted, and he was very dirty. He had no eyebrows as they had been burned off at some point, bags under his eyes, indicating a lack of sleep and whiskers showing that he hadn't shaved in a few weeks, and one could say he hadn't bathed in a few months either.

"Who are you?" he asked, as if bartering with Daleks was a common occurrence.

"WE ARE HERE FOR THE WEAPON!" Dalek Han said.

The man observed them curiously. "How much do you want to pay? Right now, it's $30, USD, mind you, down from $100 USD… no one's put up any offers on it, not sure why. It's a perfectly good weapon, quite effective, I should know."

"WE WILL NOT BE PAYING FOR THE WEAPON!" Dalek Troy announced. The man looked him, and sighed, "You talk in caps lock too? Doesn't that get tiresome? Oh, well. Right this way."

He motioned for them to follow, and they complied. He led them to a room which had numerous locks and bolts on it, and he quickly undid everyone, and went into the room. At the center of the room was a large table, and on the table was an thing that looked sort of like a rocket. It had a pointed, round red cap on top, was yellow all around, with red tail fins. A large blue shield-like logo was on the side, with the letters "WB".

"HOW DOES IT FUNCTION?" Dalek Troy asked.

"I can show you, most certainly," the man replied. It turned out that the shield-logo was a door, and when opened reveled machinery and tubes. "It needs to be plugged in, do you have a computer?"

He grabbed a few thick hoses that had colored bands and plugged them into the weapon. "My computer is not in this room," the man stated, his eye twitching. "Far too risky a thing…"


Dalek Han and Troy then had the others teleport them, the weapon and all of the necessary supplies, along with the man to their ship. The man only nodded at the new Daleks, but he had a grin plastered to his face, and his eye twitched again.

"Amazing! You have such amazing screens!" the man declared upon seeing the control room. "And those buttons! How do you know which one is which?"

This was something that was off-putting to even the Daleks, because the man seemed to be talking to himself, and not to them. Each time he asked a question, he would then wait a few minutes and start muttering to himself what the answer most likely was. "I'll show you how to operate the weapon now…" he replied, eye twitching. He rung his hands, and began to shout orders where the plugs should go. "Oh, okay." He responded to himself, and began to put the plugs in where they should go.

"You aren't working fast enough! But I'm going as fast as I can…"

The Daleks looked at one another wondering how this man seemed to know his way around a Dalek control panel. He then stopped to look at them for a second, and grinned, eye twitching. "Salt shakers and toilet plungers! I knew you reminded me of something household. As long as you are happy with who you are, that is fine because that means in life you will go very far."

He then finished the job, and dusted off his hands for a job well-done. "You can have it, take it all, take it off my hands," he started. "Because you see today I'm headed for far off and distant lands… no, no, scratch that… that was terrible, just terrible. What made me even think of that?"

He then held up some crumpled papers that had been messily stapled together, and asked, "Can you take this? It's instructions on how to operate the machine. Quite easy to understand, yes. I made sure of that, most certainly."

He placed the papers onto a table that was in the control room, and made his leave. He continued to mutter to himself, "We're tiny, we're toony, we're all a little loony… It's time for Animaniacs…"

Dalek Kath decided to simply return the man home, because he was not perceived as a threat, and the man keeping his life should suffice as more than enough payment.

Once the man was back at home, he began laughing, and ran around his yard yelling, "I'm free, I'm free! HAHAHAHAHAHA!"

So now you know where the Daleks got their weapon. Why was it there? Who was that strange, eye-twitching man? Where am I going with this?


*Back on the TARDIS*

The Doctor was the first to wake up, his head was pounding and his hearts felt as if they were beating a bit out of sync, that small matter was settled after he took a deep breath and used a breathing technique he had learned from the monks on the planet of Panamaru. He jumped to his feet and shouted, "Donna?" but then stopped when he looked around him. The TARDIS looked… odd. Everything had an outline. The console, the walls, the ceiling, were all as if they no longer had different colors, but instead the ceiling was just a simple shade of blue-green the walls were a shade of blue, the floor was gray, and the console was tan. A better way to describe was that a lot of detail had been removed, but the basics were there. The Doctor noticed that the console had all of its bells and whistles, but somehow there was less detail. He didn't have time to worry about things like that, so he ran to Donna, who also had an outline. He checked her pulse, and that was fine. She moaned when he shook her gently.

"Oh, my head…" she started, but stopped when she eyed the Doctor. "What the bloody hell?" She then turned to look at her own hands, which looked, well, cartoony. "What is this?!" she yelled.

"I'm not sure," the Doctor admittedly replied. "The last thing I remember is that vortex sucking us in. I think it took the Dalek's ship too, although I'm sure that wasn't what they were intending."

Donna admittedly, had changed shape a bit. She had a rather exaggerated hourglass figure, with her chest being a bit more buxomly, and her hips fuller. She pulled out a small mirror to look at her face, and was surprised to find that she still retained some of her facial features, but her looks were once again a bit exaggerated.

She was able to observe the Doctor some, noticing his hair seemed thicker and wilder, he was skinnier, if that was possible, with his limbs being longer than they were before. He was running around the ship inspecting for any damage, but was finding that the TARDIS had changed to fit her new environment. He ran down one of the corridors that had something to do with another part of his beloved ship. "Oh, Sexy…" he said to himself. "What have we gotten ourselves into?"

He then heard Donna scream, in a bit of a panic, he ran back to the main part of the TARDIS, hoping that the worst was not about to greet him when he got there.


A/N

This idea sort of came around as I was watching Animaniacs, and was reminded of Doctor Who as the Warner's tower is "bigger on the inside"... A lot of ideas just started flooding through, that I just had to start writing about them. Plus, I noticed that there are not any Animaniacs/Doctor Who crossovers- why hasn't it happened yet?

I decided to go with the 10th Doctor because he is quite zany in his own way, and is so energetic. I'd imagine him thinking that cartoon logic is quite brilliant. I went with Donna, because she would likely have the best reactions out of all of the companions, and would most certainly be the target of unwanted affection and censors.

So please enjoy this crazy idea.