Mari & Ilna: What can I say? I'm enjoying this adventure every bit as much as I was on day one. Maybe more.
REAL Worlders-thanks for all the enthusiastic support. You guys are the best.
Time Marches On (1/1)
"Mom." Kaitlyn bit her lip as she studied the pink t-shirt with small sparkly hearts Jenna had pulled from the rack in the girl's department. Her eyes drifted to another rack several feet away then back to her mother. "Do you think …" The young girl paused, clearly searching for the right words.
Jenna squatted down, so she was at her youngest daughter's eye level. "What is it, sweetie?"
Once again Kaitlyn's eyes were drawn to rack of colorful tie-dyed t-shirts just out of arm's reach. "Do you think maybe …" She took a deep fortifying breath. "Can I pick out my own new school clothes this year?"
Jenna paused.
The look on Kaitlyn's face made her immediately reach out and squeeze the young girl's hand.
So earnest.
So hopeful.
But also, so clearly worried about hurting her mother's feelings.
"Of course you can," Jenna smiled. "Show me what you like."
As Kaitlyn darted for the rack that had drawn her interest earlier Jenna's mind went back to a similar day in the same girl's department several years earlier when Casey expressed her desire to "never wear anything pink again" and posited that her mother's choices were "a little babyish."
She knew it was a right of passage.
She'd gone through it with her own mother.
A young woman's desire to begin to mold her own style. Express herself through her clothing.
Boys were different. The moment came much later for them. Dylan was still perfectly happy to have his mother pick out all his new clothes and if she did it without him even having to set foot in a store, well that was all the better.
As Kaitlyn pulled a shirt off the rack and held it up to herself in front of the department's full-length mirror, her smile as bright as the garment's colors, Jenna smiled wistfully. Over the last several years she's watched her shy, sensitive daughter begin to assert herself. Her vegetarianism. Her staunch defense of and advocacy for animals. How seriously she took pet ownership.
She'd noticed Kaitlyn was more willing to express her ideas within the family. As with her plan to donate the loose change from their family fun day fund to Tutor Time. There had also been comments from several of her teachers on her end of the year report card the previous spring that Kaitlyn was speaking up more in class and taking the lead in school projects.
Still she had to admit it stung just a little.
She knew that pulling away was an essential part of growing up. That it was a sign she was doing the right things as a parent. Giving her daughter all the tools she needed to become more independent.
She looked at the sparkly t-shirt in her hands and sighed. It was the end of an era. And the start of an exciting new one. If there was one thing parenthood had taught her it was that it was possible to be both happy and sad at the same time.
"Do you like this one?" Kailyn's face was flush with excitement as she looked at the swirling colors in the mirror.
"I love it,' Jenna said. "And it looks beautiful on you."
"Do you still know a guy at the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration?" Danny asked without preamble as he pushed through the door of Steve's office.
Steve barely looked up from the report he was writing. "Yeah. Why?"
"I might need to run a few car possibilities past him and get his thoughts on which one is the safest and most reliable." Danny flopped down on his partner's couch and sighed. 'I can't believe I'm going car shopping."
"Why are you getting rid of the Camaro?" Steve asked. "I really like that car."
"Well obviously all of my car buying decisions are based on what you like and don't like," Danny snarked. "But I'm not getting rid of the Camaro."
"Then what … " Suddenly the dime dropped and Steve knew exactly what was going on. "For Gracie?"
Danny dropped his head backwards dramatically. "It's time. Rachel called last night and we had a long talk about it and … it's time."
"Wow." Steve shook his head. "Are you sure?"
"We're sure." Danny had known this moment was coming, he just wasn't prepared for the knot that would form in his stomach when it actually arrived. "She's proven herself to be responsible with both the Camaro and with Rachel's car. She's a good driver. She hasn't missed her curfew even once. It's time."
"Wow."
Danny rubbed his temples. "You seem to be stuck on that one word."
"It seems like an appropriate word for the situation," Steve said as he leaned back in his chair.
"She wants to drive to school. And to cheerleading practice." Danny sat up and looked at his best friend. "She's ready. I'm just not sure I am."
"I remember my first car," Steve said wistfully.
"Me too," Danny snorted. "And I'll tell you one thing for sure. Gracie won't ever drive anything like my first rusty bucket of bolts. That thing was held together by duct tape and bondo. There was hole in the floor on the passenger's side. My friends called it the Flintstone-mobile."
Steve chuckled. "Mine wasn't quite that bad. But it was bad."
"To tell you the truth I was worried Rachel was gonna wanna buy Grace something top of the line right out of the gate, but luckily she's on the same page I am," Danny said. "We want something safe and reliable. But nothing flashy."
"It's hard for me to picture Grace having her own car," Steve sighed.
"Hard for you?" Danny raked his hands through his hair. "Imagine how it feels for me. Just yesterday I was looking down into the face of my gorgeous newborn daughter and then I blinked and now I'm car shopping for her."
"It's a rite of passage," Steve smiled softly. He knew someday he and Danny would be having this same conversation again except this time he'd be the one shopping for a first car for Angie. His heart clutched slightly as he pushed that thought out of his head.
"She's a good kid," Danny said earnestly. "She's smart. She's responsible. She makes good decisions."
"Absolutely," Steve agreed.
"She deserves this," Danny continued. "I want her to have it. To feel that exhilaration that comes with your first real taste of freedom. Do you remember that feeling?"
"Absolutely." Steve smiled. "There's nothing like it."
"Parenthood is a strange thing," Danny sighed. "On the one hand I wish she could stay a little girl forever. But on the other hand, I'm excited to see her take on the world."
"She'll always be your little girl," Steve replied wistfully.
Danny nodded. "I know. It's just that now she's gonna have her own car."
"And I got a princesses backpack." Joan held her new purchase up in front of Mary's laptop so Steve and Catherine could see it."
"Very nice," they smiled.
"And I got new crayons, and pencils, and a notebook, and some glue …" Joan pulled the items out of the backpack one by one and lined them up on the coffee table. "I need all these things because I'm going to real school this year," she reported.
Steve grinned. "I heard you met your teacher the other night at orientation."
Joan's face crinkled with confusion. "Oreo what?"
"Orientation," Mary chuckled. "Remember when we went to your new school and we looked at your classroom and we met Miss Essie?"
Mary remembered standing in the back of the classroom watching Joan interact with several of her classmates and feeling a wave of emotion wash over her. Happiness that her kind, happy, outgoing, fearless daughter was starting this new phase of her life and at the same time nervous and anxious knowing it would bring not only great joys but also disappointments. That she wouldn't be there to protect her daughter from bad days and hurt feelings.
She knew Joan needed to learn those things on her own. It was an important rite of passage. But still, as a mother she was tempted to grab her daughter and take her home and never let any of the bad things in the world get anywhere near her.
"That was fun." Joan's face brightened immediately. "I have my own cubby hole and Miss Essie is nice and my friend Brittany is in my class and Daddy sat on one of the little chairs and made me and Mommy laugh."
Catherine bounced Angie on her lap. "It sounds like you had a great time."
"I did!" Joan said excitedly. "Wait … my new lunchbox is in the kitchen. I'll go get it so you can see it," she said as she darted out of frame.
"I bet you'll never guess what the lunchbox theme is," Mary said.
"Princesses," Steve and Catherine chuckled in unison.
"Here it is!" Joan squealed happily as she skidded back into the picture. "Look … princesses!"
"That's perfect!" Catherine grinned.
"Someday you'll have a lunch box like me when you go to school, Cousin Angie," Joan said as she leaned close to the screen.
Steve smiled, remembering his conversation with Danny earlier. He knew the day would come, probably faster than he wanted, but in the meantime, he was determined to just soak in every minute of his Angie's early years.
For so many years when he was younger he was always looking ahead to the next thing. Starting at the Academy, then graduating, his first deployment, then BUDs school, his next promotion.
His gaze was always focused off in the distance.
But once Catherine settled on the island, and now even more so since Angie had arrived, he had learned to live in the moment. To enjoy the beauty of the here and now. To appreciate every little smile and every happy laugh.
"I have to show you my new clothes!" Joan said as she disappeared from the screen once again and headed, Steve and Catherine assumed, towards her bedroom.
"I hope you're ready for a fashion show," Mary chuckled.
"We are," Catherine assured her. "How about you? Are you ready for her to be in school full-time?"
Mary shook her head. "I have no idea where the time went. Seems like just yesterday she was a baby. But she's excited. And I know she's ready. So I've promised myself I'll wait until the school bus is out of sight on Monday before I start crying."
"You'll be fine," Steve said confidently.
"At least you have your own classes to distract you a little." Catherine picked up the keys Angie dropped on the table and handed them back to her. "Did you get yourself a new backpack and some new school supplies when you went shopping with Joan?" she teased.
"As a matter of fact, I did," Mary smiled. "I skipped the princesses though."
"Did you get camo?" Steve asked hopefully.
Mary chuckled. "No. Just a nice solid blue. I figured I'm already gonna stand out being twice as old as my classmates I don't need to make it worse with a flashy backpack."
"You are gonna do great," Catherine said without a trace of doubt in her voice.
"Absolutely," Steve agreed. "They'll see how smart you are in no time then the age difference won't matter."
"I hope you're right," Mary sighed.
"Aren't I always?" Steve smirked.
"So, are you ready for the big 4-0?" Lea teased as the staff meeting broke up and her chief of staff stayed behind to review their next moves on the budget bill.
Catherine chuckled. "I guess so. I know it's a landmark birthday but I'm not sure exactly how I'm supposed to feel."
"If you want my opinion," Lea reached into the stack of files on her desk and pulled out the new budget projections, "It's much ado about nothing. Just another way for society to try to make women feel bad about themselves. Like somehow aging is a punishment."
Catherine creased her eyebrows. "I never thought of it that way."
"Look at you," Lea said. "You have an important job which you are beyond great at, a one-year old, a husband, and a wide circle of friends. You not only find time for all of that, but you volunteer your time for charity, teach self defense and are, if you'll pardon my french," she grinned. "An all-around bad-ass. Forty is just a number. You could run circles around most 25-year olds I know."
"Thanks," Catherine smiled. "It's funny. Carrie and I were just talking about this the other day. When we first met at the academy we couldn't picture ourselves at 30 let alone 40. And now here we are. But we both agreed that if we had a chance to go back there isn't a single thing we'd change."
Lea smiled. "It's a great feeling, isn't it?"
Catherine nodded. "There are definitely specific incidents I wish had never happened. Mistakes I would have rather never made. But they're part of who I am. Part of what brought me to this point. Part of what makes me appreciate everything and everyone in my life. I wouldn't change that for the world."
"I am so grateful for the day you came over to help with the human trafficking case," Lea said sincerely. "At that point I had no idea I'd be sitting in this chair … at least not so soon. But I knew that if I was ever lucky enough to get here you were exactly the kind of person who could help me accomplish the things I want to get done for the people of this state. We make a great team."
When Lea accepted the offer to run for Lieutenant Governor it was assumed that at some point she would make the leap and try for the so called "big chair". But in truth, nothing had been decided. She and Lance thought they had time to discuss the pros and cons. Did she want to continue in politics or did she want to retire from public life when Governor Denning left office and enter the private sector?
Take more time with her husband and kids.
Lower her stress level.
All those decisions were taken out of her hands when Denning left office unexpectedly. She had no idea how she would have gotten through that period, or the time since, without Catherine by her side.
"I think so too," Catherine smiled.
"And were just getting started," Lea said excitedly. "We have a lot more good to do. And hopefully the people of Hawaii will vote us in for another term next year so we can keep going."
"They will,' Catherine said confidently. "You've been a great governor and everyone can see that."
"Thank you." Lea regarded the woman who had become a good friend and one of her closest confidantes. "Age is just a number and 40 is just a rite of passage. Let's go out there and show them all that we're just getting started. They ain't seen nothing yet."
Catherine beamed. "Let's do it."
"I thought she was supposed to be having mashed sweet potatoes for lunch," Joseph observed as he came out onto the patio of the condo and saw Angie sitting between Grandma Ang and Elizabeth giggling happily, her mouth ringed with chocolate pudding.
"She ate a few bites, but she just wasn't in the mood for it today, so we've moved on to dessert," Elizabeth smiled.
Joseph grinned. "At this point I feel obligated to say what Catherine would say if she was here which is that she never got to eat dessert if she didn't finish her meal."
Grandma Ang's eyes danced. "She did at my house."
"It's a grandmother's prerogative," Elizabeth chuckled.
Joseph laughed. "Ok, ladies, I'm off to the grocery store to pick up a few things. Anything you'd like to add that wasn't on the list on the refrigerator?"
"We need more pudding." Elizabeth said guilelessly.
Twenty minutes later Angie sat on the ground happily playing with her stacking blocks, Elizabeth right across from here and Grandma Ang watching from her favorite chair.
"It's a whole different world, isn't it? Ang said with a smile. "Being a grandmother as opposed to being a mother."
Elizabeth beamed. "It's like taking all the not so fun parts out of parenthood and just leaving the good stuff. Obviously you still want them to have good manners, and develop good habits, and just generally be good people, but you don't have to be the disciplinarian. You don't have to spend so much time in teacher mode." She chuckled. "And you don't have to do so much picking up after them and making sure they eat healthy and sleep enough."
"You can feed them pudding for lunch," Ang grinned, "and let them stay up late and skip a nap here and there."
Elizabeth nodded. "It's a great gig."
"Just wait," Ang's eyes got damp. "It gets better. As they grow you get to be their head cheerleader, their soft place to fall, their trusted secret keeper. There's nothing in the world like being a parent but being a grandparent is a very close second."
"I think we can see the proof of that in the bond you and Catherine have," Elizabeth said softly. "I know her times spent with you over the years are some of her most treasured memories."
"You're gonna make me cry," Ang said as she swiped at her eyes.
"Go ahead," Elizabeth smiled softly as the blocks in front of Angie came tumbling down much to the delight of her giggling granddaughter. "It's a grandmother's prerogative."
THE END
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