Body Say

Disclaimer: I don't own anything I just love this song and these people. Demi Lovato owns the rights to the song Body Say.

I'm sitting in my music room trying to get my life together again. Playing with some cords lyrics come flowing out of me. Lyrics from a deep and hidden place; a place I thought I shut the door on almost 5 years ago.

"Our eyes are crossing paths across the room. There's only one thing left for us to do." I sing out to an empty room my mind drifting back to the last event we were both at….Fuck…..I'm fucked!

"Babe?" I hear Wilmer call out in the hall. Slamming my notebook shut I call back,

"Yeah I'm in here love." My fingers grazing over the keys almost scared if I press harder the whole world will know my secret. A secret that can never get out.

"Hey are you coming to bed? You have an early workout and a full day of meetings for Future Now. "He comes up behind me rubbing my shoulders and kissing the top of my head. I'm going to hell. I have the best boyfriend who loves me more than anything and I'm sitting here thinking about jumping my best friend…..what the fuck?

"Yeah I'll be up in a minute I have this melody playing in my head I need to get it all on paper." I mummer truing my head to kiss his hand. I need to finish this song and go to bed. Between the song and the kickass workout tomorrow these feelings will be gone….or at least back to where the need to be so I can live my life.

"Well I can't wait to hear this new song when it's done." I felt him smile into my hair and I choked on the lump that formed in my throat at the thought of him listening to this song. If I have it my way no one will ever hear this song. "Don't stay up too much later. I love you." With a parting kiss he starts to walk away. He was at the door before I realized I needed to say something back.

"I love you too Wil, Goodnight." My mind was already miles away deep in thought about my issue.

I had feelings for Nick Jonas. When we were kids before rehab I always had a crush on him. I mean who didn't? Those chocolate brown eyes and those curls! But there is more to him; he has a kind hear, warm soul, arms that can crush any fear or insecurity you may have…..anyway, after rehab I needed a break from my old life. I needed a new normal before I started bring old people back in. When I first started feeling good with my new lease on life I ran into Wilmer at an after party. He and I focused pretty much on our relationship and I didn't focus on others in my life. Nick and I were friendly but it wasn't until his break up with Delta did we really start hanging out like old times. He is one of those guys that when he has a girlfriend he doesn't really hang out with other girls a whole lot. Besides our relationship can be hard on our signifcant others. Wilmer and I had huge fights when Nick and I stared hanging out a lot more but eventually he came around and the three of us were really close. That is until he met Oliva. We all four tried to hang out but I really don't like that women I don't know what it is about her, but she isn't right for Nick. Over the last few weeks of planning the Future Now Tour which will be summer of 2016 what I thought was a childhood crush has come back full force…..what am I going to do?

Sighing I push back from the piano, I need to get some sleep. I shake my head free of all thoughts of Nick as I turn my light off leaving my open notebook forgotten on the bench.

_NJ_DL_NJ_DL_NJ_DL

I was just about to jump in the shower when Nick called.

"Hey Nick what's up?" I take a drink of my water left over from my workout.

"Hey D mind if I come over early and just chill before all the meetings?" he sounded exhausted which meant him and Oliva were fighting again.

"Yeah that's fine I'll be in the shower but just let yourself in. I'll come find you when I get out." I say checking the water.

"Ok thanks see ya soon." He hung up before I could respond. Sighing I jump in the shower. I hate it when Nick and Oliva fight not because it's hard on their relationship but because it's hard on Nick. He has been so busy the last year. His solo album came out, we are planning our tour and Oliva seems to think that she needs to be the center of his world all the time. I just out of the shower and throw on some clothes, I love meeting days I don't really need to do a whole lot of getting ready. Running down to my kitchen I grab a salad from the frigid and go to find Nick. When he is in this mood he is always in my music room it's our safe place when we feel the world has turned against us. I open the door and freeze. Nick is sitting there reading the lyrics to the song I was working on last night….the song I wrote about wanting to fuck him…..well shit!

AN: Let me know what yall think!