"Haley can you come down here please?" Nathan called from the foyer. Haley walked down the stairs to find Nathan by the door, his duffel bag at his feet.
"Where are you going?"
"I'm leaving."
"What? Why?"
"Because I have to" He said slowly.
"Nathan, what has gotten into you?" She asked running her hand through her hair confused. "I have no clue what you're saying"
"I'm not me anymore Haley, something changed. And I don't know where or when. I can't be that person anymore. I just...basketball was my dream. And it always has been. But then you came along. I don't regret meeting you but for these past few years, you have been my focus...I can't do that anymore if I want to be somebody. I realized that the other day. And I can't have both. I've been a jackass to you lately. I've been staying out late, coming home drunk, and that's not the guy I am. That's the guy I was before I met you. I need to find me. I don't know who I am anymore, or who I even want to be."
"Are you saying you don't want to be my husband anymore? That's not the guy you want to be?"
"I don't know. That's what I'm saying Haley. Before you came along I knew what I was going to do. I was going to get drafted into the NBA, and that hasn't happened yet. Then I met you and everything got pushed aside."
"So I'm just a problem for you."
"No I'm not saying that either."
"Than what are you saying?!"
"I'm saying I need time. I need space. I need to find myself again and find out who I want to be. By myself."
"Well then I guess you've made up your mind." Haley said wiping away tears.
"Don't cry Haley that will just make it harder."
"My husband is leaving me because I've turned him into someone else, he doesn't recognize himself anymore because of me, how am I supposed to react Nathan?"
"I just...I'm going to go stay at my dad's beach house. I know where the spare key is and no ones been there in years."
"Fine...what do I say to you Nathan? What am I supposed to say? I can't make you stay. Then you will resent me. But I don't want you to go."
"Say what my mom used to say to me, If you truly love someone, set them free."
"And if they're really yours they'll come back." She finished. "Fine then Nathan...I'm setting you free. I didn't know I was encaging you though." She said turned away from him and putting a hand to her face.
"Haley"
"No Nathan. You don't have to explain it further. I crushed your dreams and ruined your life. Now go ahead, and explore what I kept from you."
He sighed and threw his bag over his shoulder. "I guess this is goodbye."
She turned to face him. "I love you Nathan. I always will, always and forever." He nodded understanding before walking out of the house, not sure of what to reply.
Haley grasped the wall as sobs wracked her body when the door shut.
"Haley" Brooke said walking into the house after knocking multiple times. "The door was unlocked. Where are you?" She could hear sniffles and followed them all the way up to Haley's bedroom. "Haley what's wrong?" Brooke asked running into the room once she saw her best friend sobbing uncontrollably on her bed, clutching some of her husband's belongings.
"Nathan left me, he...he said he didn't know who he was any more."
"What?"
"He's gone Brooke and he's never coming back. I lost him because I smashed his dreams and once he met me apparently he gave up on them."
"But..."
"I wasn't good enough for him. I'm not the girl for him."
"Oh honey of course you are."
"No I'm not Brooke, I am not the one for him...but he's the one for me. He's the only man I could ever love and I'm never going to get the chance to again."
"Hi Haley" Karen said gently greeting the girl that was like a daughter to her. News traveled quickly throughout the couples inner circle of friends of what happened, but even throughout it all Karen never heard Haley mention one bad thing about Nathan.
"Hey" She said quietly taking a seat. It killed Karen to see her like that. She wasn't the same, and she never would be without Nathan.
"Still no word?"
"Nope, it's been weeks. I don't think he's ever coming back...I don't know how to live without him Karen."
"You will find a way, I know you will. You are the strongest person I know Haley and you will face this with grace and courage like everything else."
Haley took the long way home, what was the rush, she was going home to an empty house anyway. Their empty house. The house they picked out together. They painted it together. They chose the furniture imagined their future their together. Four kids playing in the yard with the dog. Haley composing music on the porch swing while Nathan played ball with the kids. Haley would cook dinner while the kids sat around the counter helping. Nathan would take the boys camping. Haley would teach them how to read. They had their future mapped out. But now all of that was gone. What was the rush anymore? Nothing mattered to her without him.
She opened the mailbox only to find a large manila envelope. She knew what it was, and in a way she expected it. Haley walked inside and sat at the dining room table before slowly opening it.
Petition for Divorce
Her heart sank as she sat there contemplating and crying for hours.
Haley slowly crept up the stairs to the beach house, she put down the box gently and laid the envelope on top. She reached up and rang the doorbell before running away as fast as she could.
Nathan opened the door and looked around to see the small package. He took it inside and placed it on the coffee table contemplating for a moment before sitting down and opening the letter.
Nathan, enclosed are the divorce papers, a message, a memory, and lyrics to my new song that I want you to read. I'm singing it tonight at Tric. Come and hear me because their is another song, a surprise I'm singing as well. Look over the divorce papers carefully, because I'm sure you won't see what you wanted. And just remember that fateful day when we had our first lesson. Because that day meant everything to me.
I will ALWAYS love you, Haley
He slowly opened the box and pulled out a dvd, which he set aside, a lyric sheet, the manilla envelope, and a smaller package. He opened the envelope first. He flipped to the last page, where she was supposed to sign and instead of her name she carefully wrote in her beautiful writing I love you...
He sighed and went to the small package. He slid the contents out to find the bracelet and a piece of paper. He gave her that bracelet the first day she tutored him. It was the start of everything and was one of Nathan's favorite memories of his wife. He unfolded the paper to notice it was Page Eighty One that was the page she had him open to on that day. That was their first lesson. Haley James had kept that paper all those years without him even knowing. If she had done that it meant more to her then most things. Haley James, the good girl, had ripped a piece of paper out of a textbook. She risked being yelled at by her teacher just to have that page.
Next he went to the dvd, and popped it into the played. He heard the shuffling of the camera, her behind it.
"How do I know if this damn thing is on...oh the lights blinking okay." He heard he say. Then the camera severely moved. "Ouch" He chuckled lightly knowing she tripped over the tripod stand.
She took a deep breath and sat on the couch in their house. "Well uh...Hi their Nathan. I just...before you made any decisions I wanted to talk to you. To say that after all this time thinking and separate from you I realized...it's my fault. I was selfish with you and took you for granted. I never thought that I could ever push you away but I have. You see I now realize you were always doing everything for me, pushing me to pursue everything I wanted in life. and even though I tried to get you to follow your dreams I didn't try hard enough like you did with me. I didn't push you hard enough like you did with me. I am grateful you pushed me to excel, but in the meantime everything you wanted fell to the way side. I...I understand Nathan, we got married young...we didn't live out all of our opportunities because of it. But don't think for one second I blame you for any of this, I blame myself. I should have helped you more, and encouraged you more. You were my rock and always supported me, but now I worry that I never supported you enough. So baby, find happiness, follow your dreams, live life to the fullest. Even if you don't want me by your side while you do so. So go for it all and know I will always support you. I will always love you. And when you are ready come back to me because I will always be here for you. Always and Forever.
"And the divorce papers...I can't do that Nathan. That is something I won't do. I Vowed til death due us part and I will not break that vow. Ever. So if you want a divorce you are going to have to fight me hard for it because even if I said for you to go live out your dreams. I would rather die than live mine without you." By this time tears were falling freely down her face, as they were for Nathan as well. "Well I guess that's all I have to say...I love you Nathan." She whispered before reaching up to turn off the camera. "How do I turn this damn thing off" She muttered "I always made Nathan do it, stupid camera"
He sighed. She never did know how to work the video camera. He was the one who understood electronics. She didn't.
He looked down at the last thing. He reached for the lyrics and started reading words that seem to be right from her heart. From reading those, he knew everything she was feeling. And everything that mattered to her.
Like Haley said she would she was on stage at Tric, she took a long deep breath and began talking " Hey guys, so I wanted to...dedicate my performance tonight to...To my free bird...I hope you are flying high and living your life the way you always dreamed of because as hard as it is...I just want the best for you. I want life to bring you happiness, even if I can't." She sighed trying to accept it and come to term with his wishes
You say you gotta go and find yourself
You say that you're becoming someone else
Don't recognize the face in the mirror
Looking back at you
You say you're leavin
So you look away
I know there's really nothin' left to say
Just know I'm here
Whenever you need me
I'll wait for you
So I'll let you go
I'll set you free
And when you see what you need to see
When you find you come back to me
Take your time I won't go anywhere
Picture you with the wind in your hair
I'll keep your things right where you left them
I'll be here for you
Oh and I'll let you go
I'll set you free
And when you see what you need to see
When you find you come back to me
And I hope you find everything that you need
I'll be right here waiting to see
You find you come back to me
I can't get close if you're not there
I can't get inside if theres no soul to bear
I can't fix you I can't save you
It's something you have to do
So I'll let you go
I'll set you free
And when you see what you need to see
When you find you come back to me
Come back to me
So I'll let you go
I'll set you free
And when you see what you need to see
When you find you come back to me
And I hope you find everything that you need
I'll be right here waiting to see
You find you come back to me
When you find you come back to me
When you find you come back to me
When you find you come back to me
He looked up at her on the stage as she gripped her left hand on the mic, her engagement ring diamond shining brightly and her wedding ring in clear view. The chain around his neck holding his ring suddenly felt heavier as his heart fluttered.
When I look into your eyes
It's like watching the night sky
Or a beautiful sunrise
Well, there's so much they hold
And just like them old stars
I see that you've come so far
To be right where you are
How old is your soul?
Well, I won't give up on us
Even if the skies get rough
I'm giving you all my love
I'm still looking up
And when you're needing your space
To do some navigating
I'll be here patiently waiting
To see what you find
'Cause even the stars they burn
Some even fall to the earth
We've got a lot to learn
God knows we're worth it
No, I won't give up
I don't wanna be someone who walks away so easily
I'm here to stay and make the difference that I can make
Our differences they do a lot to teach us how to use
The tools and gifts we got yeah, we got a lot at stake
And in the end, you're still my friend at least we did intend
For us to work we didn't break, we didn't burn
We had to learn how to bend without the world caving in
I had to learn what I've got, and what I'm not
And who I am
I won't give up on us
Even if the skies get rough
I'm giving you all my love
I'm still looking up
Still looking up.
I won't give up on us (no I'm not giving up)
God knows I'm tough enough (I am tough, I am loved)
We've got a lot to learn (we're alive, we are loved)
God knows we're worth it (and we're worth it)
I won't give up on us
Even if the skies get rough
I'm giving you all my love
I'm still looking up
"Thanks" She whispered placing her guitar down and wiping a stray tear. "Have a nice night."
She quickly ran to her dressing room so she wouldn't break down in front of a crowd of people but found someone she didn't expect in there.
"Nathan" She whispered.
"Hi Hales...I hope you don't mind I came in right after you finished singing.
"No I don't" Then she noticed the manilla envelope in her hands. "I'm not signing those Nathan. I won't"
"What?" He noticed what she was staring at. "Just look at them okay?" He bargained as she sighed and flipped through them until the last page where she stopped.
They were the old ones. He hadn't drawn up new ones. But their was something different.
She looked at where it said Haley Bob James Scott and her handwriting that said I love you...
But what was different was what was below it.
Nathan Royal Scott and on the line Nathan had scrawled I love you too.
"Nathan." She said as her heart stopped.
"I was wrong...I don't need to play. I don't need to go off and find myself. You're what I need. You're all I ever wanted and you're better than some silly old basketball dream I had when I was ten. You're my dream girl, and you've given me an amazing life. I hate how much pain I've caused you and how I could just leave you like that...that was a person that I'm not. The person I want to be is a man whose good enough to be seen with you, a person who loves you so much that my heart beats faster when I see you, which it did. Before I went crazy. I'm only myself when I'm around you. I wanna grow old with you. I want to start a family with you. And I hope that I haven't hurt you bad enough that you still don't want the same things with me.
Haley stood in her place as tears rolled down her cheeks. "I love you" She whispered.
"I love you too Hales, Always and Forever" She leaped into his arms as he caught her.
"I've been wanting to hear that so bad."
"I'm so sorry Hales, I was immature and being selfish when I left. You are the only thing I ever need, I'm so sorry."
"It's okay, it's all okay now." She said brushing her hand over his cheek. "I was so scared. Don't ever scare me like that again."
"If I ever start talking like that again declare me insane and send me to a mental institution because I would be for wanting to leave you."
"Nathan" She said with a chuckle.
"No, it's crazy for me to think I would want a life without you, we've been together since we were sixteen, I can't live without you."
Haley sniffled before he leaned into kiss her.
"I love you so much it hurt to be apart from you, I just...I wanted to try being on my own, I don't know why now, it was stupid."
"All this time...while you were away I couldn't' stop thinking about what would I do? I don't know how I would live without you, how I would go on. I can't wake up every morning without you next to me and I can't imagine it."
"This whole thing taught me something very important though" Nathan said as Haley looked up at him. "I don't want to live a life that you're not in, and I should have known it before but I know it now, and I hope that counts."
"I guess I will have to accept it" She said jokingly as he leaned down to kiss her once more.
"Maybe we should get started on that whole 'family' thing now." He said with a smirk.
"Nathan" She said lightly before he cut her off.
"Do you know how much fun we are going to have."
"Nathan" Haley chuckled but then became serious.
"What is it, do you not want kids right away?"
"We don't have to get started now because I'm already pregnant."
"What?"
"I'm pregnant...I'm eight weeks along...I found out a few days ago."
"Oh my God" He whispered looking down.
"Say something please?" She said nervously.
"I'm an ass"
"What?"
"Not only did I leave my wife but I left my pregnant wife. How could I have done that?"
"You didn''t know...can we move past this please. You made a mistake, one which I understand. We got married young, we didn't have time to do all the things we wanted, and before this sometimes I did question what our lives would have been like if we had dated a little bit longer and now I know, now we both know we cannot live without each other. This made us stronger as a couple and now we can handle anything. I love you Nathan...so please tell me, are you happy or?"
"I'm ecstatic" He said smiling wide and wrapping his arms around her waist "We've wanted this for so long, and now we are having a baby together. I love you so much Haley James" He leaned down and kissed her.
"Scott" She whispered against his lips. "It's Haley James Scott and it always will be."
"Always and forever."