Disclaimer: *sings* I am in MIIIIIIIIISERYY, there ain't noboooody who can comfoorrt me. *sniffs* I don't own Glee. And yes I still miss the Warblers, come on guys, be honest with me, who doesn't!

A/N: For some strange reason I just imagined a world in which I do not know about Darren Criss's existence.

So freaking bleak.

So Kurt's sadness in here is mine, and Blaine's anger in here, yeah, most definitely mine, of course it is theirs too, more than mine, always.

I mean, even the idea of a world without Darren Criss is enough to send anyone over the edge, right? Right?

Well here is what it did to me.

Something cool to calm my mind

Twenty minutes in the boys' bathroom, never a good idea to begin with, but Blaine is not really thinking about that when he first sees Kurt in tears; ducking into the boys' bathroom?'

He is instantly more worried than surprised, because apart from it being an unusual thing to see, Blaine is painfully aware that a boys' bathroom is not the safest place for Kurt to be in at all.

As Blaine pushes the door open he finds Kurt leaning up against the wall next to one of the sinks. Eyes closed, the back of his head resting against the tiles - strangely always cold no matter how the weather is outside - and both his hands wringing a hat, which is clearly part of the costume he is in, which Blaine only notices now altogether.

Silent tears are still streaming down Kurt's face when he opens his eyes, to see who just walked in.

Their eyes meet for a split-second before Kurt closes his again and sinks his head.

Blaine knows the exact moment when Kurt opens his eyes again, head still cast down, and realizes himself that he is after all still in puffy trousers and tights. His whole body stiffens instantly and Kurt lets out a sound that to Blaine appears half sigh and half annoyed groan.

"Hey," Blaine tries to get Kurt's attention.

"Hey," Kurt replies, eyes fixed on the floor right in front of Blaine, or maybe Blaine's shoes. Blaine himself cannot tell, but, either way, he is satisfied with the knowledge that he now seems to have Kurt's attention.

"What's wrong?"

This question is enough to have Kurt's legs give way, Blaine catches Kurt by his upper arms as he is already sunk half-way to the floor, back still pressed against the wall.

"Kurt?"

"I can't," he says, shaking his head.

"Please tell me what happened."

"They all think I am a joke."

"The jocks?" Blaine asks, his face glazed over with worry as Kurt's first reply is to let out a strangled sob, followed by a bitter laugh.

"Kurt, you are scaring me," Blaine says, tilting his head a little to try and catch Kurt's eye while gently pulling him back up into a standing position.

Kurt is instantly leaning back against the wall for support, and Blaine's hands remain resting lightly on Kurt's arms, steadying Kurt's stance; Blaine not trusting Kurt being focused enough to keep standing on his own for however long this conversation will take.

"I am used to that, and do you think I would hide in a boys' bathroom from them, really? How stupid do you think…they all think I am so stupid for even trying to…" but Kurt's sentence is drowned in his own tears.

"Shh, shh, Kurt," Blaine tries to comfort his boyfriend pulling him fully into his arms as he says, "You know I don't think you are stupid in any way," after a moment of just holding Kurt, Blaine adds in a small voice, "So why are we in here?"

"Well, you are, I'd guess, because you saw me duck in here in this ridiculous costume and followed me."

"That costume really is a little ridiculous," Blaine jokes when he detects the slightly bit of amused sarcasm in Kurt's voice that is so Kurt it makes Blaine first smile and then add, "but Kurt, you know you can pull of anything, tights are actually a much better look for you than Berry."

Blaine had expected a laugh like always when they joked about the girl's non-existing fashion sense, which is something that never fails to cheer up Kurt, but Blaine is taken by surprise when Kurt tightens his grip around Blaine's body and begins to sob into Blaine's shoulder.

"What has Rachel done?"

"It was not just Rachel."

"Who else?"

"I tried to act a believable Romeo for them but they all just…they just laughed at me. I thought they would understand, see past the obvious, being who they are, but even Miss Pillsbury…and then Rachel started laughing when I leaned in to kiss her where I thought it would fit the scene."

"That's it," Blaine almost shouts as he pulls himself out of Kurt's arms.

The door of the boys' bathroom swings shut for two seconds before Kurt pushes it open again, hurrying after Blaine who has taken to running down the corridor in the direction of the choir room.

"Rachel Berry," is all Blaine says as he enters the choir room packed with most of the other members of the Glee club, as rehearsal is about to start in a couple of minutes.

Rachel spins to face Blaine and has the audacity to smile 'after what she just did to Kurt' Blaine thinks anger clear on his face.

Blaine is still too upset with the girl to find words so he does something he has never done in his life, hoped himself he never would.

The sound of the slap that Blaine places on Rachel's face echoes around the room, accompanied by the stunned silence everyone seems to have fallen into simultaneously.

The dreaded quiet is soon broken by a gasp from Kurt, who is standing in the doorway and Finn's angry "What the hell, dude?", as he shoots up from his seat.

"Why don't you ask Rachel? I am sure she can explain it all," Blaine says before moving to the back row of the chairs, sitting down, arms crossed over his chest, eyes cast down, clearly already a little ashamed of his own lack of self-control, but just as clearly still angry too.

Kurt is still standing in the doorway as Mr. Schue walks in, past Kurt, chipper and clueless as always.

"Kurt, come on in, we need to get started."

A frown on his face, and finding himself thinking 'oh gosh, still in those tights', Kurt heaves a sigh before he replies "I am just going to get changed Mr. Schue, I will be back in a moment."

Kurt walks down the corridor to his locker and while getting out some clothes keeps wondering what to make of all of the day's events.

Closing the locker Kurt moves to rest his forehead against the cool metal, "What a mess."

A/N: That last sentence, I have decided today, is practically how I overall feel about 'I Am Unicorn'.

Also, in IAU so many characters felt out of character to me that I really wanted to slap someone and feel no shame in seeing that slap as legit canon, because really Blaine slapping Rachel after what she did to Kurt on that stage does not seem that farefetched to me. Now feel free to disagree with me and leave me an angry comment, or a friendly one *winks Blaine style*, because it is the best and creepiest wink ever at the same time.