Disclaimer: Dearest readers, this is false. So shut your traps.
It was a gloriously sunny day when Bucket awoke. She rolled over and found herself on the floor, for she had fallen asleep in the train compartment. Her friend Hype also woke up, but with a scream, having been frightened by the crash of Bucket.
"You scared me!" Hype gasped putting her hand over her heart.
"Well you scare easy." Bucket quipped back returning to her chair.
"This is going to be boring isn't it?" Hype asked after a long pause.
Just as the words came out of the girl's mouth the compartment door slid open to reveal a boy standing there with a look of concern. "I heard a scream." He stated.
"No, you didn't." Bucket retorted, her blue eyes brightening playfully at the sight of the brunette boy. He stared at her, "well, considering my compartment it right behind yours and the fact she," he indicated towards Hype, "looks shocked, and you are on the floor, and that I did, indeed hear a scream, I'd say yes, I did." What he didn't realize is that Bucket was no longer paying attention to him, but staring behind his shoulder. Hype, on the other hand, did, and kicked her. "Bucket is demented, she has no memory of anything, so don't even bother talking to her." The boy frowned at the name 'Bucket', but smiled down at Hype.
"What's your name?" He asked tilting his head to the side. "Hype." The girl replied a little shyly. The boy, who ever he was, cocked his eyebrow at this "Why are your names so strange?" He asked "They're Dutch." The girls replied in unison. "I see...Well I'm going back to my compartment...Shout again if you need anything." He said smiling again at Hype before he left who waved a shy Bye to him as the door shut. When she finally tore her eyes from the door Bucket was smirking at her. "What?" She said defensively. "Awwww Little Hypie!" Bucket crooned.
"You just shut up!" Hype cried, mock-glaring at Bucket, who rolled around laughing, for she was still on the floor. After two whole minutes of giggling and glaring, Bucket sat up, "you wanna go torment people?" she asked, already getting up and opening the door. Hype pushed herself up, grumbling, "I don't even know why you bother asking, God!" But Bucket was already pressing her face against the glass doors of the compartments, making the inmates squeal. Bucket found this uproariously funny because she knew that the trolley lady had just come by with snacks. So, she figured everyone thought it was the woman.
Hype couldn't help but giggle a little bit though she only trailed behind not participating in the disturbance of the other passengers. Bucket, however was having a blast. Until her face pressed up against the glass of the compartment to have another face jammed against the glass on the other side. In shock Bucket fell back but soon scrambled to her feet throwing the door open. "YOU! Are a PINEAPPLE!" She shouted but the ebony haired boy on the other side was laughing far too hard to notice. She looked at the dark haired boy with a glare for a moment before he stood wiping his eyes of the laughing and offering her his hand. "Sorry." He said crystal blue eyes meeting hers. "Oh...Well you know..." He tilted his head "I know?" "Good for you." She said taking a brush out of her purse and walking out again. Hype stood in the hall with a giggle. "Awwww Little Bucki." She mimicked.
The glare Bucket tried to shoot at Hype did not cover up the large smile that she had on her face. When Hype began to laugh at that, Bucket's red cheeks turned redder and she hid her face behind the curtain of her blonde hair, which she was brushing. She admired her reflection for a minute, and then put the brush away. "Now." She started, turning to Hype, " where are we?" Hype thought for a moment, looked out the window, then consulted the GPS System she was born with in her head, "we have, like, 10 minutes until we get there." Bucket whooped, "YAY!" she screamed, "LET'S GET NAKED!"
The door opened again and the black haired boy jumped out with a whoop as well pelvic thrusting beside Bucket. "Get out of my dancing space!" Bucket said pushing him back into the compartment. "I must insist you stop that..." The brunette from earlier said standing in the hall with his arms crossed. "Go back to your compartment and dress quietly and don't disturb anyone else."
"Ew god don't listen to him!" The black haired boy said leaning on the doorframe his hair sticking out at odd angle from the fall. Bucket twitched taking out her brush again and beginning to brush the boy's soft hair back into place with out consent or warning.
"Shadow I insist you go back into your compartment." The other boy said arching an eyebrow at Bucket. Hype had buried her face in her hands. "Don't even listen to this kid, he's all goody-two-shoes but he's not so good when teachers aren't around. Prefect HA! I laugh at you, Andy, I laugh! AND LAUGH!" Shadow said only casting a glance at Bucket as she brushed his hair flat.
"I get it Shadow; you laugh..." Andy said putting his thumb and forefinger to the bridge of his nose.
"Shadow...That's a weird name. Mines Bucket." She commented out of nowhere.
"It's Dutch." She and Shadow said in unison and then laughed.
"Great...Two of them." Hype and Andy groaned also at the same time they glanced at each other and looked away smiling softly.
Bucket finished brushing Shadow's hair and put the brush away. "Well," she said, "Iĺm going to put on my uniform, because it's a skirt and I love skirts." She backed into her compartments and slammed the door, screaming "NO HYPES ALLOWED!" Hype sighed, "She's in one of her moods again..." Andy blinked; Shadow went back into his compartment, singing loudly. The silence between the two was awkward, both of them were embarrassed about their friends, but they both kept meeting each other's eyes and blushing. "I need to...um... I'd better..." Hype waved her hand towards the compartment, her eyes not leaving his, Andy started, and glanced away, "oh, yeah, me too... Can't leave him alone long..." They both smiled at each other and backed up into their compartments, both saying "bye" quietly.
When Hype finally turned around, she saw Bucket all dressed and making plane noises with her wand, "vashoom...vashoom... reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeh! EEEEEEEERRRRKK!" The wand braked infront of Hype's face and Bucket flicked it "ARGINTOUSLE!" With a wild grin, she waited for something to happen, and when a snail fell from it's tip, she threw it at the wall, where it stuck and started to creep up. The compartment door swung open as she was screaming another hex, "ADVADA KEDUVA!"
"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" A boy maybe a year younger than them with dark hair like Shadow's but green eyes and glasses shouted.
"EW WHAT ARE YOU DOING! GET OUT YOU! EW AND GET THAT SCAR REMOVED!" Bucket screamed grabbing hold of the boy and kicking him out of the compartment and slamming the door. "You...Punted him." Hype said staring wide eyed. "So? He was some gross little sixer." She said. "Bucket the sixers have been sevies for a year now. And he'd by a fourth year not a sixer." Hype said looking out after the boy. Why did that kid seem familiar? "PSSSSHHHHH! You're just pissy." Bucket said before looking at the ceiling, which was a swirling vortex from her previous hex. "Just be thankful you messed up that spell and nothing happened." Hype said as she finished getting her robes on. Bucket gave a smile that you'd have to know to understand. "Yes...Nothing happened. Lets go find that love of your life again!" Bucket said shoving Hype out the compartment and away from the vortex before she noticed. "BUCKET!" Hype yelled, going bright red.
Bucket shushed her and they peered down the hall for their new friends. Without warning, the train skidded to a halt and Hype nearly fell over. They heard the conductor swear, "almost missed that stop, I did," he slurred, sounding kind of drunk. Bucket laughed, but was drowned out by the conductor, "OI!" He shouted, "You lot! Get off my train!" The girls picked up their purses and began to walk towards the door, but the glass doors of every compartment flew open and kids piled out, their ages ranging from 11 to 17. Hype shrieked as the mob of people surrounded them, she grabbed hold of Bucket's arm, the one that wasn't pushing people out of her way, and was pulled to the door. "Jesus," Bucket said, exasperated, "it's like they like school or something." She glared at the glasses kid she had punted as he walked by, "You know who's gross? HIM!" Hype shook her head, "get moving, you ding dong."
Stepping off the train Hype noticed they didn't have their bags. "Oh don't bother going back for them. We have the important stuff in our purses and we get a school uniform...Besides they've probably been sucked into the vortex by now." Bucket said continuing to walk towards a series of Carriages all without horses attached to them. "Oh well...Wait...WHAT VORTEX?" Suddenly Bucket's purse fluttered slightly opening it to double check that Lune, her orange and white Tabby, hadn't hopped in as it was very cramped (he had been exploring the train and she presumed he'd find his way to the school). She opened her bag to see a similar swirling vortex to the one that was on the ceiling of their compartment. "I don't know what you're talking about Hypie." Bucket said preoccupied with shoving her entire arm into her purse, which of course would not look suspicious at all. She soon discovered Lune was indeed in her purse as she took him from the vortex as well as Way, Hype's little grey kitten, and their luggage...And the Conductor. "EW!" She screamed shoving his head back into the vortex that sat amongst a bunch of notebooks. "I really could keep Morgan in here." She mumbled to herself before looking back up to Hype who was staring slack jawed. "I TOLD you we had all the important stuff in our purses." Bucket said exasperatedly as if it was obvious as she handed Hype her kitten. She opened her mouth to say something but Bucket grabbed her luggage and began to run off towards the carriages. Hype had no choice but to pick up her luggage as well and follow.
All the carriages seemed to be filling up fast, so when Hype caught up to Bucket, she was pushing a couple second years out of the carriage. "Move it, you dyke." Bucket said, nudging the girl out. She and her friends stared up from the ground at her, scandalized, but didn't say anything. Hype quickly climbed up and sat in the seat across from Bucket. "Are these things pulled by nothing?" Bucket asked, leaning over and swatting the air in front of the carriage, when her hand collided with something, she screamed and stuck her arm into her purse again. She came back out with a bag of flour and dumped it in a six-foot ratio around the carriage. Hype slapped her hand to her forehead, "Bucket, get back here, you nut!" Bucket complied without protest and they made their way up to the castle.
Once they reached the Great Hall, a big hand pushed them up with the first years, all of which were barely 5 feet tall. Bucket, at 5'9, and Hype, at 5'5, felt very awkward. The big hand was attached to an even bigger man, and he was escorting the first years, including a tiny boy covered in the big man's, or Hagrid, as he's called, long fur coat. They waited patiently in line as the first people went up; Achoo, Amber, Adamson, Edward... But, with her mild ADHD, Bucket started looking at the crowds of people at the tables. She nudged Hype and pointed at the yellow table, "my God, Hype, look at him! He's fucking hot!" This came out louder than she expected and the eyes turned to her, she blushed and said "um... It was Colin..." To her surprise, the red table looked at the small boy who looked like the other, smaller boy standing in front of them.
"Bergin, C-" An older looking witch began to read off the list but Bucket's ADHD seemed to clear up immediately and she snapped her head up. "DON'T SAY MY SLAVE NAME!" She screeched the entire great hall looking at her in bafflement. "It's Bucket. Bergin, Bucket or Bucket Bergin if you're normal and not a freak job like YOU!" She said giving a scathing look towards the glasses boy.
"Right...Bergin... Bucket..." Professor McGonagall said scribbling out the previous name and putting in 'Bucket', Bucket skipped up to the front taking a dainty seat on the stool. She had soft blond hair, cut just above her shoulders and bright mischievous blue eyes set in a tanned face with rosy cheeks. Around her neck she wore five gold coins that certainly didn't look like galleons.
As she sat down someone from the green table stood up. "WOOooooOOOOOooo!" The dark haired boy she recognized as Shadow did the one-man wave as Andy, who sat beside him, tried to pull him back down into his seat to which Shadow recoiled with. "Don't touch me there. But sat back down. Bucket and him sharing a broad smile from across the room as half the great hall snickered. The other half, especially the people from the blue table, gave exasperated looks.
Professor McGonagall placed the hat on Bucket's head it only took a few seconds before the hat shrieked out "SLYTHERIN! DEFINATELY SLYTHERIN! GET ME OFF HER HEAD!" Bucket cackled slightly but stood fixing her hair. "My beoooooootiful head." She said handing the teacher the hat. "Which one's Slytherin?" Bucket asked and the teacher gave her an expression of disbelief. "The green one..." She said pointing at the Slytherin table where Shadow was being firmly held down by Andy as the table did a little golf clap. Shadow did however manage to do a small sitting wave, which Bucket returned in a small movement of her wrists before grinning and heading over.
"Why fancy meeting you here. You know the hat said the saaaaame thing about me! What a coincidence." Shadow said with a smile as he pushed some boy over a ways so she could sit. She laughed "Get me off her head?" "Yes the operation was completed this year. Pretty sweet huh?" He joked back. "Sorry about him...He ate about 23 chocolate frogs." Andy said. "Psh, he's my husband." Bucket said the remark making little sense. "Yeah jeez. She's my wife." "And he's the father of my children. Where's my child support?" "I haven't left you yet!" "Psh I want it anyway."
Andy looked away, smiling despite himself, and turned his attention back to the sorting stage. Professor McGonagall read off Ewin, Kenneth and he was sorted into Hufflepuff. The yellow table cheered almost as loud as Bucket and Shadow, who were cheering because they didn't get the weird last named kid. When the next kid, Fouger, Hannah was sorted into Slytherin, the two booed, making the girl glare, she took a seat next to the pug nosed girl who looked a bit younger than them.
Finally it was Hype's turn, "French, Hype?" Asked the old woman, peering at the page. Bucket snickered like a maniac. "Mmhm," Hype sat down on the stool, and pushed back her fine, feathery, long brown hair and adjusted her glasses, which weren't nearly as big at the portrait Bucket had drawn of Hype on the back of her shirt. Hype had yet to notice it. She looked a little nervous; being as she had more brains that evilness. When Professor McGonagall handed Hype the hat, the room went quiet. Sensing Hype's awkwardness, Bucket stood up on her seat, "GO HYPE!" She shouted, jumping up and down. Hype looked behind her and saw a male teacher with long black hair put his face in his hands. Smiling again, Hype put the hat on her head. When it spoke to her, she shrieked fell off the stool. Regaining her posture, she adjusted her self and listened. I see you have a marvelous mind up here, I'm sure Ravenclaw would be- No... You want to be with your friends, I see... you're loyal... Maybe Gryffindor- OK! OK! The brim of the hat opened and it shouted "SLYTHERIN!" She got up off the stool and ran to her friends.
Hype ran into Bucket who spun her around once but then dropped her friend. "I'm not like that Hype, you lesbian." She said sitting back down. Hype sighed dusting herself off and standing up. Bucket looked around. "Go sit beside your lesbian girlfriend." She said pointing to Andy. "There's someone sitting there, Bucket." Hype said looking at the blond boy. "Psssh. Andy, punch him." Bucket ordered. "I can't do that." Andy said dryly. "Hype your girlfriend sucks. Shadow, go punch him." She said. The blond boy looked up. "I can HEAR you, you know. Do you have any idea who I am?" He snapped. "A gross little sixer who needs to wash his hair. Shadow, go punch him." Bucket prompted nudging the boy. "I can't punch Draco!" Shadow said, as if it was the most heinous thing he'd ever heard. "And why not?" Bucket said putting her hands on her hips, which since she was sitting hit the boy beside her in the side with her elbow. "He's my lover! Ain't that right kitten?" Shadow said leaning over Andy to stroke Draco's arm, who looked at him horrified and disgusted. The blond turned to the two beefy boys by his side and announced they were moving as people around them snickered especially Bucket who was giggling insanely. "Right then..." Hype said taking the seat Draco had previously been sitting in.
The first course arrived and they served themselves some food. Half way through, Dumbledore stood up, "Ok, all, since we are all done dinner", he clapped his hands and the food disappeared, a collective groan sounded through the Hall. Dumbledore laughed, "No, I'm totally kidding. I have some news and I'm SO FUCKING EXCITED!" The pupils exchanged looks of shock at hearing their beloved headmaster swear. "Ok, shut up. This year we're holding the Triwizard Tournament. You have to be 17 to enter, there will be a curse put on it and blah blah blah, go eat again." He sat down and the food reappeared. Now the hall was buzzing with excitement. Bucket sighed, "I wish I could be cursed..." Hype snorted and the Slytherins stared hopefully and wickedly at her. Andy's eyes widened, "don't SAY that!" He said loudly, Bucket pouted, "you're crushing my dreams..." Suddenly she smiled again, "hey, who's that guy?" She pointed at Draco, "Why's he a snob?"
"That's Draco Malfoy. He's a pure blood and his father is a git. It's hereditary." Shadow said several people glared but he just smiled back. "Well that's a dumb reason to be a snob! If he was as awesome as me, I could understand." Bucket said smoothing her hair and nodding. She clapped her hands together, "so, what do you do at this school? Magic? Because I have this wand and I'm all," she pulled out her wand and waved it, "Supafly!" It began to snow red flakes. From across the room at the Hufflepuff table, a first year girl yelled "EW! THE SKY IS BLEEDING!" and everyone looked up. With his wand, Dumbledore made it stop quickly and went back to eating. "Bucket, you can't just make up spells and yell them. You could do something bad..." Andy said, having dealt with this before with Shadow, "so you're saying I need a spell book that's been clarified by the Ministry before I can make any spells?" Bucket asked, Andy nodded; she reached into her bag and pulled out a Standard Spell Book.
Bucket began flipping through the pages. "EW! WHO'S THAT GUY?" Bucket screamed, pointing in disgust at a picture of Merlin. Shadow looked over her shoulder. "Ew, it's Merlin." He said completely non-chalantly returning to his meat, which he was piling onto his potatoes to make a picture of a stick man in a top hat. "You can't 'Ew' Merlin, he's the father of controlled magic!" Andy exclaimed. Bucket looked at him with a look of complete and udder disinterest. "He looks like an old man to me." She said turning to Shadow and looking at his plate. "OH! Hype you sooooo have competition, Shadow and I are gonna art your socks off." She said giving the stick man a carrot mustache. "Oh I'm sure." Hype said covering her face once more.
The Slytherin table stared at them, having never had a group like this one. Dumbledore got to his feet to make his speech, "another year has started and I hope all of you-" He was interrupted by a loud "YEAH! TAKE YOUR TOP OFF!" by Bucket. Dumbledore stared, appalled, "ok, everyone, go to bed." Before he could hold them back, Bucket and Shadow ran out of the room, knocking over first years and getting dirty looks from the prefects. They bowled through a cluster of 17 year olds who were investigating the goblet, laughing as they were sworn at. Hype and Andy sighed, "we've been friends with them way too long to just ditch them, haven't we?" Hype asked and Andy nodded.
Andy showed her the way to the Slytherin common room where Bucket and Shadow had previously scurried off too. It appeared as though everyone had gone to bed except for the giggles coming from under a blanket pulled over two chairs on which was stuck a notice in neat writing. "Bucket and Shadow's Castle. Cool-er than Hogwarts since 1991". Hype raised an eyebrow at a small handful of first years, which were looking at the makeshift fort critically. "What are they, four?" One girl said, the group of four around her laughed. "And what are you, eighty-three? You certainly look it. Get to bed, Grandma, before you strain yourself." Hype snapped the girl looked at her with a glower raising her wand but Andy stepped in. "Go to bed, you won't want to miss your first day of class or start the year on the wrong foot would you?" He inquired. The first years grumbled but grudgingly headed up the stairs.
"So there are perks to befriending prefects!" Hype said with a smile Andy chuckled softly and smiled back. "Oh my god I totally know!" Shadow said pulling up the blanket or 'wall' of the fort. "Last year I totally almost killed someone and got out of it." "You did not" "Well I could have." Bucket laughed, "ha, prefect, what is this? England?" Andy smiled in that humoring way, "actually, yeah..." But Bucket and Shadow had already crawled back into the tent. "I think we need to upgrade our sic crib..." They heard Shadow say and a satellite popped out of the top of the tent. The whole thing collapsed under the weight and the four students went to their bedroom.
"Okay," Andy started, "you girls go up that staircase to the girls' dormitories. We'll see you in the morning." They went their separate ways. Once in the room, Bucket burst into laughter, scaring the other fifth year girls. "Why are you laughing, you freak?" Hype asked, going to her trunk, "because you're dating a goodie-good!" Bucket yelled, flopping down on her bed. Hype pursed her lips and frowned, "shut up, he is not." Loud, continuous, and extremely fake snores from Bucket indicated that the conversation was over. Hype sighed and pulled on her pajamas.
Later Bucket woke up with the moon shining on her face, she looked at the window and saw Hype sitting there, staring at the lake. "Whatcha doin'?" asked Bucket, getting out of bed and going to stand next to her, expecting a sob story about home sickness or some other crap like that, Hype pointed, "I'm imitating that kid. The one you punted." Bucket looked up and sure enough; there was Harry Potter, gazing out the Gryffindor tower window. Bucket laughed and opened the window, "GO TO BED, YOU FAGGOT!" Harry started, and his eyes widened in shock when he saw them.
Both of them made a face then ducked out of the way screaming with laughter. "WILL YOU SHUT UP!" The girl in the bunk over screeched sitting up with curlers in her hair and a green facial mask. This time the two friends just screamed Bucket throwing the nearest thing to her, which just so happened to be a lamp. After many more disputes and quite a few threats the Fifth year girls dorm was quite once more everyone back in their place. Until..."Pssst...Hey Hype." Bucket hissed. "Mm?" Hype mumbled rolling over to face her friend. "Let's TALK!" She said. "Can I go to sleep after?" "MMMmmaybe." Bucket lied. "Kay." The brunette fumbled for her glasses before coming to sit on the end of Bucket's bed.
"Soooo what do you think of Shadow?" Bucket said with a grin. "I think you'd make beautiful children pack full of pure evil and weirdness." Hype replied sleepily yawning and rubbing her eyes. "PERFECT!" Bucket said with an evil grin. "I think your Andy boy is a bit too uptight. Maybe hanging with the Tea Party Posse will loosen him up a bit." She said holding out her hand out for a high five but Hype was falling asleep where she sat. Bucket gave a look of exasperation and jabbed her friend harshly in the ribs. "OW!" Hype yelped. "I saaaaaid, maybe hanging with the posse will loosen him up." and she held her hand back up. Hype returned with a pitiful excuse for a high-five but Bucket was satisfied. "That or Shadow will." Hype said with a sudden giggle. "You know with the uniforms and all..." She said contemplatively "Oh my god I totally know!" There was a moment of silence between them "TOTAL PAIRING!"
ENd Chapter One
Wasn't that awesome! Stay tuned, ya dykes.