"Food's ready!" Izumi barked at the man outside. "Mason, get your ass in here!"
"Coming!" the man yelled back and soon entered the house. He smiled at the woman and took a seat.
"I think you'll be surprised, believe it or not, but I've gotten even better at cooking," she said with her back turned against him and her husband. When Izumi turned around, she had a big plate in her hands.
"What is it, dear?" Sig asked and sniffed in the air.
"A casserole by the old Harnet recipe" Izumi said and put it down on the table. It was like a brown-white-yellowish creamy lump.
"Mm, smells good" Mason said and licked his lips hungrily.
"Dig in!" Izumi said and sat down at her place, taking as much as she could from the lettuce.
"Aren't you eating?" Mason asked confused.
"I would but the old mossy doctor says that it's not good for my health…" she grunted before smirking. "But that leaves more to you two. So it's your lucky day"
"Yep... Indeed..."
Later
Izumi yawned as she quietly padded down the hall in her slippers. She had spit out blood again so she had to go up, take her medicine and then go back. She had just forgotten that it made her ill if she didn't take it with some food. So therefore she had spent more than an hour on the toilet… no comments. Ugh, it was such a pain.
"So why did you marry Izumi?"
She stopped and listened. That was Mason's voice. Why did he ask that? That was none of his concern!
"Because she is wonderful, beautiful, wise, strong and I love her more than anyone"
Izumi swooned and bit her hand so she wouldn't giggle like a school girl. That was her man, all right. She sneaked closer to the kitchen, where the voices came from, just to see if they said something more about her.
"I understand" Mason laughed. "Just wondered, because… her cooking"
Oh, they were going to praise her cooking? Come on, she hadn't been that good today…
"Her cooking?" Sig asked. "What do you mean?"
"Come on, Sig. Don't joke around, you know what I mean" Mason said.
Mason is going to get extra—"—It stinks"
… WHAT?!
"God, it's a pain just to pretend I like it!"
"Oh"
"You haven't felt it?"
"No"
"How come?"
"Bad taste buds"
"Lucky you, but lucky me that you guys are going to the East for a couple of weeks"
Mason. Is. Dead.
"But if I tell her I'll be dead before I can say 'it was a joke'. So I'll just suffer in the quiet… Hey, Sig, you aren't going to tell her this, are you?"
"No"
"Ah, good. If you did, Izumi would get so angry"
Oh, you bet I will, Nancy boy. With that she angrily, but discreet, made her way to the bedroom, fuming with anger. So her cooking was bad, huh? She'd show him, she'd show them all. First Dublith, then… the world…! BWAHAHAHAHA—coughblood.
The next day
"Mason, could you come over here for a second?"
"Sure. What is it, Izumi?"
"Oh nothing special. Just something about my cooking"
"What—"
(insert blood, pain, screams, smashes, punches, etc)
One hour later.
"Mason, the next time, just tell me if you don't like my cooking. I wont be mad, why should I? Now be a good boy and take care of the shop while we're away. Okay? Well, see ya around!"
Izumi walked away from the bloody pulp that once was a guy named Mason.
-Fin-
A/N: There was someone on DA that commented that both Kakashi and Izumi were reading books while fighting their pupils, but also said that Izumi was about Easy Cooking and Kakashi's was about… stuff. So then I thought "Why Easy Cooking?" Then it came to me that hey, maybe she really sucks at cooking! So this came from it. Oh, and Harnet is Izumi's maiden name according to a Gaiden.