A/N: Reviews are greatly appreciated :)

-InMyHeartofHeart

Disclaimer: I don't own the Hunger Games.

"I count the minutes

I count the hours

I count the seconds

Till you're here by my side again."

—Ricky Martin, "I Count The Minutes"

I Count the Hours

"They found this hidden in his cell," Gale whispers softly.

Several hours have passed since they have rescued those held captive. Johanna, Annie and the others are in a stabilized condition. It is Peeta that they've wounded, both physically and mentally, the most. She did not know what to expect when he returned. A warm embrace, perhaps a few, shared kisses. To cry over this boy, to relish in the fact that he was still alive, safe and within her grasp. Instead, he hates her very existence, and she has only herself to blame.

His hands locked around Katniss Everdeen's throat so suddenly that she didn't have time to react. The shock of him being present still hadn't worn off, but now it has. They say he's been hijacked, but after telling her that they don't know if there even is a cure, Katniss has stopped listening. Because the boy she knew so well is gone, and in his place is just another monstrosity the Capitol has created.

She watches as Gale leaves the crumpled piece of paper on the nightstand by the hospital bed. Those who have peered inside did not read more than three words. The letter had been addressed to her, and they felt as though it was an invasion of privacy. She guesses in some ways, it is.

But Katniss wanted them to read it instead of her. For she knows if she does, the letter will become her lifeline. It will give her hope that one day Peeta could return to her, and in the midst of war, she cannot bring herself to hope for something that might not come true.

Gale leaves. Five minutes pass. Ten. Fifteen. Time moves slowly, and soon, it does not move at all. She can feel it waiting for her reaction, just like everything else. Because she is the Mockingjay, the girl who sparked the rebellion that was long overdue. But once the flames have been ignited, they won't stop until they burn down everything in their path, and they started with him.

She can feel tears begin to well up in her eyes, but blinks them away. For she cannot afford this, not with cameras monitoring her every move. Katniss soon is reminded of the arenas, the way the audience knew every minute what the tributes were up to. Publicity was inevitable. Even simple things like love were tarnished by the Games. She winces at her last thought.

Thirty minutes pass. Temptation sets, and she begins to give in. She does not feel her fingers as they reach for the piece of paper lying innocently just several inches away. Taking it in her hands, she opens it slowly. The texture is rough, the ink faded. The paper is burnt around the edges, as if someone had thrown it into a fire and pulled it back out at the last second. But those are his words on this paper, and that is more than enough.

Dear Katniss,

I never thought it would end this way. Just several days ago you were in my arms as we watched the sunset. I didn't tell you then, but the colors had reminded me of you. A burst of yellow, orange and red, a burst of fire. I know you don't see it, but you're beautiful and so much better than what you give yourself credit for.

If someone asked me why I love you, it is because you're you, and nobody can ever change that. I have a thousand things to say to you, but don't have the time to say it. They gave me five minutes to write one last goodbye. And I wanted this letter to be addressed to you.

There were times where I knew you were faking, and that the whole thing was just one big lie. But that night on the beach... I felt something from you, something true and deep, and for the first time, it felt as though you loved me, too. And though that's all I ever asked of you, I knew it was too much. Not after Gale, and especially not after your father's death.

Maybe if you're father was still alive, things could have been different. It was his death that changed you. Maybe we could have had a life together, if it weren't for the Games (and if I could have ever worked up the nerve to talk to you). But the Capitol controls everything in our lives, even love. And that's one of the many things I can never forgive them for.

Your father was a great man. I didn't know him well, not as others did, but I felt the same pain you felt when I gave you the bread on that rainy day. I remember that whenever he would come by the bakery, he would always be in a cheery mood. You didn't deserve to go through that, especially at such a young age. Yet even then, you never gave up. It didn't kill you, I knew it wouldn't. It only made you stronger. And that's because you're a survivor.

I'll never forget my times with you, both good and bad. It didn't matter if you returned my feelings or not, because for once in my life, I was happy. And that was all because I was with you. If you are reading this, it's because I'm gone. But don't cry over me. Move forward, keep going, just like you always have. There are people, an entire nation, out there who are fighting for a cause that is worth dying for. Don't give up, not when you're so close to changing this country. Spring will come, and soon enough, the dandelions will bloom.

I love you, always,

Peeta

It is then that she finds herself unable to hold back any longer. Katniss breaks through her already shattering walls, the glass cutting into her skin like knives. She will never get to tell him what she really feels, the words that always take her so long to say, because that kiss on the beach had been their last. The old Peeta is not coming back, and that is something she cannot accept. Tears soon begin to spill. She no longer feels numb, but instead hollow, as if someone tore her heart in two, leaving nothing in it's place.

Good. She deserves it.

Her cries continue on for several minutes, countless sobs that do nothing but cut her up more. Each and every tear that falls is another reminder of what she will lose if their side does not win. Prim. Gale. Haymitch. Katniss Everdeen is the Mockingjay, and if she loses flight, they are done for.

She recalls suddnly the mine explosion that took her father's life. In every dream she has of him, his last words are always her name. During her childhood, he would sing her and Prim to sleep nearly every night. His voice was beautiful, so full of love and life, it was able to make one forget about everything else.

He loved everything about the forest, including the animals. But out of all of them, he once said that mockingjays were his favorite. Curious, Katniss asked him why.

"A mockingjay was never meant to exist. Katniss, many things in this world weren't. When the Capitol released the jabberjays into the wild, they never expected them to survive. And this new hybrid, it did not die off either, but instead it found hope. Katniss, it found a will to live."

Later, in her own room, with Prim and her mother already asleep, she allows herself to think of Peeta's final words, and possibly what he could have meant. Spring will come, and the dandelions will bloom.

Memories come surging through her, an indefinite rush. Swimming together in the waters of District 4. All those nights on the train in which Katniss lay in his arms, warm and secure. The tears in her eyes, unbeknowest to him, whenever she heard Peeta whisper her name in his sleep. The days in which they spent together working on the book. Before the Quell. Days in which things could have almost been normal between them. Almost.

But then she thinks of Peeta, and of everything he had once felt for her. His feelings had been unconditional, perhaps a bit misguided, but never-ending, nonetheless. He had loved her, despite the pain and suffering she put him through. Peeta Mellark had been her safe haven. He had once been her home.

Who is the Capitol, to decide he cannot be again? If things were reversed, Peeta would be doing everything in his power to get Katniss to return to him. And that is when she realizes she must do the same for him.

While her love may have been the very catalyst that drove Peeta to his own destruction, it could also be the very thing that saves him as well.

All she has to do is try.

And so she begins to count the hours, day by day, until the two star-crossed lovers are reunited at last and are able to finally shine the light that has been deprived from them, since the beginning.

The End