The day you slipped away

'I miss you.'
'Miss you so bad'
"I don't forget you. Oh it's so sad'

It had been 2 weeks.
Two weeks sense the day Arthur had held his lover in his arms as he slowly died. It had been two weeks sense Arthur had last slept. It had been two weeks sense Arthur could close his eyes and not see the stupid goofy smile that always covered his manservant's face.
It had been two weeks sense Merlin died.

For the last two weeks Arthur had cried every night until the stage when he would pass out. His life had been too short; they didn't have enough time together, they'd only just found each other and it was over.
Arthur would never forget.

'I hope you can hear me'
'I remember it clearly'
'the day you slipped away'
'was the day I found it won't be the same'

Every night Arthur prayed Merlin could hear him. Hear him crying in the dead of night. See him yelling and screaming as he destroyed everything in his room out of anger. He could still remember it like it had just happened that very moment. A sorcerer had arrived in Camelot disguised as a nobleman so his act was believed until the moment he sent a dagger flying towards Arthur's chest. Merlin had jumped in front of Arthur collapsing to the ground as the dagger pierced his chest. Arthur fell to the ground beside his lover trying anything and everything to make the bleeding stop, to save him. Merlin had been scared Arthur knew this, he felt Merlin shaking in his arms but Merlin had refused to show any sign of fear. His last words to Arthur were whispers of love. That day had changed Arthur. The moment Merlin slipped away from him Arthur knew his life would never be the same again.

'I didn't get around to kiss'
'you goodbye on the hand'
'I wish that I could see you again'
'I know that I can't'

When he was able to sleep again Arthur spent his nights dreaming of sweet stolen kisses alone in the corridors late at night. Of night spent together with Merlin flushed beneath him groaning as Arthur took him throughout the night. Every morning Arthur woke up wishing he'd kissed Merlin one last time before he died. He wished with all his soul that he could see Merlin again. He knew his wishes would never come true.

'I hope you can hear me'
'cause I remember it clearly'
'the day you slipped away'
'was the day I found it won't be the same'

Even now after all this time Arthur could still feel Merlins blood on his hands. He could still feel Merlin shaking in his arms. If he closed his eyes he could still see Merlin looking up at him as he died. No Arthur's life would never be the same again because it couldn't. Not without Merlin here with him.

'I had my wake up'
'wont you wake up'
'I keep asking why'
'now your gone, now your gone'
'there you go, there you go'
' somewhere I can't bring you back'
'now your gone, now your gone'
'there you go, there you go'
'some where your not coming back'

After the sadness came the anger. Arthur yelled and screamed at anyone who mentioned Merlin's name to him. His knights became scared to spare with him out of fear of what he might do to them. Arthur cursed the skies and the heavens for taking Merlin form him. He searched and begged for anything that would bring Merlin back to him. Until one night while he lay in bed thinking about who else could help him he rolled over to ask what Merlin though when it hit him. Merlin was gone; no matter how hard he tried Arthur could not bring him back.

'The day you slipped away'
'was the day I found it won't be the same'

The day Merlin died change Arthur. He no longer cared what people though off him or his relationship with Merlin. If anyone dared ask why he was so sad a mere servant had died instead of him Arthur just told them he loved Merlin more than he physically could, it was tearing him apart not being with him and that he wished it had been him. Arthur no longer trusted as many people. He kept his heart locked down hidden behind a false mask that Merlin had taken down and brought the real Arthur through. He didn't smile. He didn't laugh. He just kept working doing what was required of him. He wasn't the real Arthur anymore. Without Merlin there could be no real Arthur.

'I miss you'

A year after Merlins death Arthur sat on the cold wet grass while the sky poured down around him. He couldn't tell his own tears from the rain. He had changed so much in a year and yet he still felt broken, beyond repair. Arthur still saw Merlin everywhere he went. He still felt his burning skin under his own hands in his dreams.

They had found the sorcerer that killed Merlin. Uther had ordered a trail but Arthur killed him a soon as he saw him. Revenge was not as sweet as Arthur had hoped, it didn't stop him hurting and it didn't stop the burning pain in his chest every time someone mention Merlin. Looking up at the grave Arthur smiled as he read the tombstone.
'Son, friend and lover. My saviour' Arthur had another tombstone made after the first one had only said 'son and friend'.

"I miss you Merlin. I don't think I'll ever be able to stop" Arthur wiped his tears away as he stood walking back to the castle and his false mask. Merlin was Arthur's heart and without him Arthur could have none. The day Merlin slipped away Arthur had to.

The end.

This is my second attempt at a Songfic. I thought it only fare sense Arthur died in my other one that Merlin should in this one. I wrote this story for my Gran who died two days ago. Reviews are always welcome. Nim1611 ily xoxox.