Bonding time between the Kazekage and his son
"Let's learn the alphabet, my beloved son!"
Silence.
"Ais for assassination attempt, like I'm always trying to do to you. THINK FAST!"
Gaara deflects attack.
"Ha ha just kidding (but not really). Now, B is for blood!"
"C is for coffin! As in sand coffin! Awww."
"D is for death!"
"E is for eyeliner. Your fashion statement, even though you're only three!"
"F is for feelings, the things you don't have!"
"G is for Gaara, your name."
"H is for hatred, which you are full of!"
"I is for immolation (definition: the act of killing as a sacrifice)."
Gaara smiles.
"J is for juvenile detention, which is where you belong!"
"K is for Kankuro. You guys are so cute together!"
"L is for love, the word written on your forehead!"
"M is for mother. Which you don't have. Because you killed her."
"N is for nasty."
"O is for ostracizing, like we'd like to do to you!"
"P is for pain!"
"Q is for qualms, the things you don't have!"
"R is for rage!"
"S is for sanity, which you lack!"
"T is for Temari. You guys are just so cute together!"
"U is for ulcer! That's what you are to our village, Gaara!"
"V is for villain!"
"W is for wrath!"
"X is for xenophobia, which is what you make people from other villages feel for our village!"
"Y is for yearning! Yearning for us to accept you!"
"Z is for Zen, which is the opposite of your personality!"
Silence.