Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter.
Author's note: Some people might know what inspired me to write this...
Chudley Cannons
We're the Chudley Cannons! Chudley Cannons! Boom, boom, boom! We are so not pirates...
The year is 1988.
It's a beautiful summer-day and on a Quidditch field somewhere in the UK, the team known as the Chudley Cannons pratice for the start of the league.
"Alright, guys! We need to step up our game or they might kick us out from the league after this season and we do not want that." says Aaron Bigstick, the captain of the team.
"Do ye really think there's any chance for us, sir? Perhaps we'd better stop." says Simon Grover, the Seeker.
"I refuse to believe that we cannot turn things around and avoid the bad luck our team has had for so long." says Aaron.
"Okay." says Simon.
"What's your plan?" says Greg Danielsen.
"Honestly I'm not sure yet, but I'm working on it, yeah." says Aaron.
"I think it would be easier to simply throw in the towel. Our team might just as well be under a curse, since we've done so poorly for many years." says Duncan Rogers.
"I agree." says Pete O'Neil.
"Stop being so bloody damn negative, guys. Let's do our best." says Aaron.
"Okay, man." says Simon.
"Nice." says Aaron. "Let's start."
Aaron takes a seat on his broom and fly up into the air.
2 weeks later, the Quidditch season begins.
The Chudley Cannons' first match is against the Newcastle Northbrothers.
The match begins.
"The Bludgers are off, along with the Golden Snitch. Lucas Summersun now release the Quaffle...and the game...is on!"
Aaron takes position in front of the 3 goal rings.
"Michael Tuffington has the Quaffle for the Northbros. He throw and he scores! 10 points for the Newcastle Northbrothers."
"Bloody crap!" says Aaron, angry that he failed to block.
"John Remigio passes to Daniel Carrigon. Daniel throw and Aaron tries to defend...and it actually works!"
"Yes!" says Aaron.
"Chudley Cannons! Chudley Cannons! Boom, boom, boom. We are not pirates." chants all the members of the Chudley Cannons.
"Aaron passes to Greg D..."
"Let's go!" says Aaron.
"Greg scores for the Cannons! 10 to 10."
Kyle Brooks for the Newcastle Northbrothers takes the Quaffle and race towards the Chudley Cannons' goal rings.
Kyle scores easy.
"Brooks scores for the Northbros! Ten points!"
"Ah, damn!" says Aaron.
Phil Parker, one of the Beaters for the Newcastle team, use his bat to send one of the Bludgers straight into Greg Danielsen's stomach, knocking him off his broom.
"Greg's down! The Cannons are one man less."
69 minutes later.
"Bloody shit..." mumbles Simon as he and the Newcastle Seeker William Franson race after the Snitch.
"You're too slow." says William with a confident smile.
William makes a sharp U-turn and grabs the Snitch.
"And...Franson caught the Snitch! Newcastle wins!"
2 hours later.
"This is bloody embarrassing." says Aaron. "We didn't play any better this time than we did last year."
"What can we do? Clearly we're 100 % worthless, man." says Simon.
"No. There's gotta be another reason why we always lose." says Aaron.
We're the Chudley Cannons! Chudley Cannons! Boom, boom, boom! We are so not pirates...
"Maybe so, but I can't see what it is." says Simon.
"It could just be bad luck." says Pete.
"Not impossible. Though if that's the case, out team has had that for a very long time." says Aaron.
"There must be a way to win something." says Aaron.
"Are you sure?" says Pete.
"Sort of. The Chudley Cannons weren't always a weak team." says Aaron.
"Yeah, but now we are..." says Pete.
"True." says Simon.
2 days later.
We're the Chudley Cannons! Chudley Cannons! Boom, boom, boom! We are so not pirates...
"I unfortunately must tell you that because of how weak your team is, we must take out from the league." says Abraham Victorsen, the man in charge of the Department of Magical Games and Sports.
"Sir, please...I do understand that we've not played that well for years, but I'd like to have another chance." says Aaron.
"Mr Bigstick, you've already had multiple ones." says Abraham.
"Yes, that's true. Still, please give us onemore, sir." says Aaron.
"No. Request denied." says Abraham.
"Bloody crap!" says Aaron.
The next day.
We're the Chudley Cannons! Chudley Cannons! Boom, boom, boom! We are so not pirates...
"They more or less kicked us out from the league." says Aaron.
"What are we gonna do?" says Pete.
"I'm not sure..." says Aaron.
"Do you want to give up?" says Pete.
"Not in any way." says Aaron.
We're the Chudley Cannons! Chudley Cannons! Boom, boom, boom! We are so not pirates...
"Not to be rude, but what the bloody else can we do?" says Duncan.
"Number one is to not give up." says Aaron.
"Isn't that a waste of time and efforts?" says Duncan.
"Absolutely not, my friend." says Aaron.
4 weeks later.
"Aaron, here take this." says a wizard named Burton Clave.
Burton gives a big heavy leather bag to Aaron.
"What is it...?" says Aaron.
"200 Galleons...should be enough to keep your team in the league." says Burton.
"Are you sure this isn't bloody Leprechaun gold, man?" says Aaron.
"Yes, this is the real deal, not some stupid Leprechaun gold crap." says Burton.
"Okay. Thanks." says Aaron.
2 hours later.
"Now we have money to stay in the league, guys." says Aaron.
"That's perfect." says Simon.
"Yes." says Aaron.
We're the Chudley Cannons! Chudley Cannons! Boom, boom, boom! We are so not pirates...
We're the Chudley Cannons! Chudley Cannons! Boom, boom, boom! We are so not pirates...
We're the Chudley Cannons! Chudley Cannons! Boom, boom, boom! We are so not pirates...
The End.