WARNINGS: Death, killing, dubious sanity, dubious morality, noncon, pedophilia, possessiveness, cannibalism, hints of incest(if you squint)- basically just a lot of Bad Things. If you don't think you can stomach it, please don't read- things get progressively worse so if at any time you feel uneasy then DO NOT CONTINUE because it'll just get worse. For everyone else, I give the long awaited Serial Killer AU.
Also, the carving/skinning/butchering is all taken from guides on how to skin/gut pigs.
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Prologue: The Waves Will Break Every Chain*
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"War must be, while we defend our lives against a destroyer who would devour all;
but I do not love the bright sword for it's sharpness,
nor the arrow for it's swiftness,
nor the warrior for his glory.
I love only that which they defend."
- J.R.R. Tolkien
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Nohara Rin is twelve years old and her grandmother is dying.
Obaasan breathes through a tube, with the help of a machine. She looks old and frail, nothing like the woman who would take Rin on long hikes to teach about all the plants that grew near their home. She worn and haggard and so, so tired but forced to keep going through this pain because the selfish, selfish people who called themselves family.
When Obaasan asks her to unplug her machine, Rin can do nothing but agree.
Rin's parents are horrified so she widens her eyes, lets the tears she'd been holding in over her grandmother's state flow from her eyes, trembling just a bit as she apologizes. "I'm sorry," she hiccups, "Obaasan asked me to unplug it- I didn't-"
"It's not your fault Rinrin," her mother soothes, bringing her into a hug. "L-let's go get something to eat, yeah?"
Rin nods but her mind is on her Obaasan's last words, 'When they come in, cry and act confused. You did not know what was to happen. Promise me, child.'
I kept my promise, She thinks to her grandmother.
Uchiha Obito is fourteen years old and his mother is hurting.
Kaachan is beautiful and kind, everything a mother should be and carrying a heart that every person should - but she is forgiving, far too forgiving. She forgives Obito when he brings home yet more failed tests and poor grades, cups his face and urges him not to give up, to never give up because she knows that he'll be something great . She forgives Obito when she is called to his school when he keeps getting into fights with his cousins that share his school, defends him against the principal who favors his cousins and fusses over his injuries yet beams when he speaks of defending himself. She forgives Obito when his friends convince him to try drugs and his cousins use that to get him expelled, she stays at his side while he's in the hospital and she manages a smile when he really , finally recognizes what's happening around him even as she cries- he vows never to let Mama get hurt again.
She forgives his useless father who is hardly home, who cheats on her, who starts to drink- who starts to hit her . Kaachan is too nice, too kind, too forgiving for this world so it was up to Obito to protect her.
Obito goes after his father with a bat when he finds the man on top of Kaachan, trying to get her clothes off as she sobs and tries to get away, and he hits the man. Hits and hit and hits and hits until the evil, useless waste of humanity stops moving, stops making any noises and blood paints the bat, him, the floor and Kaachan.
Kaachan stares at the ma- corpse , it's a corpse that will never hurt his mother again- as she trembles, and even with red painting her she still looks like the angel she is. She looks at him, eyes wide as he smiles, "It's alright Kaachan, I won't let anyone hurt you."
And Kaachan, she cries - shying from him when he pulls the body off her so he tells her to go clean up and he'll take care of everything because he loves her. She scrambles away, swaying, and he almost goes after her but reminds himself that he has a body to get rid of and blood to clean first- that Kaachan is afraid of the body and blood so he needs to deal with that before he can comfort her over the trauma of That Man trying to rape her.
He stuffs the body in the fireplace, wood beneath and That Man's alcohol coating the body, after shaving the hair off (vaguely remembering that hair smells) and lites a fire- throwing all the bacon and sausage they have on it to help mask the smell before cleaning up the blood. Later, after he's dealt with everything and cleaned himself up, he goes to Kaachan whom is sitting quietly in her room, holding a picture of the two of them from his fifth birthday to her.
Obito hugs her, she returns it and he tells her, "It's okay Kaachan, I'm here."
Kaachan cries but that's okay, Obito is there to protect her and comfort her.
Namikaze Minato is eight and he's lost.
He'd been with his uncle who had distractedly told him to go explore while talking to a pretty girl so he did, though now that he was lost it was likely that his uncle had meant to go explore the playground they'd been at not the city. Minato doesn't cry when he realizes he's lost because he's a Big Boy, and Big Boys don't cry according to his uncle and he doesn't want his uncle to tease him even more , so he goes up to a nice-looking lady and asks her if she can tell him where the nearest park was.
The lady blinks at him and then smiles, offering a hand to hold as she tells him, "Why don't I walk you there, hm?"
Minato smiles, taking the hand and says, "Thank you."
A bit later, when the lady leads him into an alley, he asks why this way and she winks at him, "It's a shortcut, don't tell anyone 'k?"
He nods but something seems wrong about the situation so his feet start to slow until he stops and tells the lady, "I don't like it here, can we go back to the street?"
"It's faster this way," she tells him.
Minato shakes his head and tries to pull away but she holds on, hand tight around his, "You're hurting me!"
"Shh, little one," the lady cooes dragging him deeper into the alley and Minato knows something is wrong when she covers his mouth. "It's alright, you and Nana-bachan are going to play a game!"
He is confused because this, this isn't like any game he's played before and her grip hurts, he's scared because she won't let him go and that feeling just keeps getting worse and he doesn't know what to do. Kaachan told him to be nice and polite to adults (that if they tell you to do something then there's a reason for it- that it's to keep him safe ) while his uncle told him to listen to girls because he's a 'man' and a 'man' never does anything to hurt a girl.
What is he supposed to do when an adult girl is hurting him and making him go where he doesn't want to?
He doesn't cry.
Nana-bachan stops in a dark spot at the end of the alley, cars roaring by continuously on the other side of the wall that, if she hadn't been right next to his ear, he wouldn't have heard her say, "Let's play."
Minato is confused when Nana-bachan starts taking off his clothes because there isn't a bath around or anything to change into and then she starts touching him and it's weird- "I don't like that." He tells her.
"It's alright," Nana-bachan croons, fingers dancing across his bare chest and it's weird and he wants to leave but her other hand is on his shoulder, holding him in place against the wall. "You will, pretty one, you will." She promises.
This is a lie.
Nana-bachan's hand goes lower, touching where he pees from and it's weird enough- bad enough that he ignores what Kaachan and Ojisan told him and tries to push her away, kicks her when he cannot because he doesn't like this game and he just wants to leave-
"You little brat-!" she hisses, shoving him to the floor and he yelps when he slams into the ground. "I was going to be nice, even take you to the park after, but now- now I'm going to make you cry ."
Her hand moves to his stomach to hold him there, mouth going to his pee-place while the other hand goes lower, to his other bathroom place, and he kicks at her because it's gross and wrong but he only hits shoulders and her back. She curses again and her finger is pushing, pressing and going in and he lets out a yelp because it's weird and disgusting and feels wrong . His hands try to push her but it's as useless as kicking, leaving him squirming but unable to get away while his hands scratch at the floor for something to grab as the finger moves inside, feeling wringwrongwrong.
He still doesn't cry.
Minato's right hand grabs onto something cool, metal just as Nana-bachan pushes in more fingers and he screams because it hurts , feels like he's being torn and bleeding and he lashes out even though he knows it's useless- Nana-bachan scrambles away with a yelp and Minato sees that in his hand is a brittle piece of metal that's rusted and sharp, that he'd cut her face.
"We're going to play a game." Minato tells her. She hurt him, now it's his turn- it's only fair.
Nana-bachan backs away but she's wearing heels and there's junk on the floor so she trips, foot twisting and then he's on her, stabbing her with the metal. Stabbing and stabbing and stabbing and stabbing as she screams then gurgles then goes silent.
And Minato laughs because he's always liked winning games.
Eventually he stops, because he still needs to find his uncle, gets dressed again and leaves Nana-bachan sleeping in the alley covered in red then the bit of metal in the dumpster near the end of the alley because he no longer needs it. This time when he asks how to find the park, he makes sure it's an adult that has a kid with them already and doesn't hold any hands.
When he is swept up in his uncle's arms, that is when he finally cries even as he promises to himself, no one will feel like that. I'll make sure of it.
Hatake Kakashi is five and his father is letting him into the basement for the first time.
Tōsan had always told him not to go into the basement before so Kakashi is really excited to finally be allowed in there. He doesn't expect to find a man in the basement, tied up and trying to yell through a covered mouth and glaring at Tōsan.
It's the last bit that shocks him the most because it's Tōsan, why would someone glare at Tōsan ?
"This is a bad man," Tōsan tells him, crouching so they're eye-level and ignoring the struggling man so Kakashi does too. "He was going to try to hurt you- to take you from me."
It's said like a growl, furious and vicious, but it's the words themselves that shock him.
"You're mine ," Tōsan says, hand curling gently around his chin. "I won't ever let anyone take you from me, Kakashi."
He relaxes then because it's Tōsan and he doesn't want to be taken from Tōsan either. "Why did you need me?"
"We're going to have another lesson," Tōsan smiles, cheek briefly rubbing against his own before moving to the top of his head before moving away as his father stood, offering a hand and then beaming down at him when he took it. "You know that when I punish you-"
"It's for my own good," Kakashi finishes, pulling a face at the reminder of his punishments- the most recent had been a week of nothing but fried food that was disgusting .
His father ruffles his hair (the man screams behind the covering- they both ignore it). "Right. So I'm going to show you how to deal with- punish- those whom try to harm what's ours . And maybe a bit about cooking…" Tōsan adds thoughtfully, letting go of his hand to grab the man.
The man struggles but Tōsan is strong and easily drags the man to the metal table with straps on it that sat at the middle of the room, untying and strapping the man down to the table with little trouble. His father sets him on the table and Kakashi briefly glances at the man- sees the tears and fear, the terror- before snorting and turning to watch his father, the man tried to take him away from Tōsan , any punishment the man gets is just what the man deserves .
Tōsan returns with a box in each hand, one that's full of neatly placed blades and another that full of lighters and other things. His father pulls out a blade that looks like it's hooked and a runs the edge against the end of the table, "The edges of the table have been converted to blade sharpeners- it's very important to keep you blades in good condition Kakashi, understand?"
"Yes, Tōsan." Kakashi says, watching curiously as his father tests the blade by lightly running it across the man's arm.
When blood is immediately drawn, his father lets out a satisfied noise and Kakashi makes a mental note on how that was how a properly sharpened blade should be like. Tōsan hooks the tip of the blade into the shirt collar which makes the man tremble in fear, he is vaguely amused at how a grown man was acting like a rabbit, but Tōsan only cuts off the man's clothes as his father tells him, "It's best to get rid of clothes- and casts but that's for another time- since it gives you more to work with. You don't have to, but I like not emptying the pockets until after the clean up- it's kind of like a present or reward at the end. Always make sure you get rid of communication though, it wouldn't do for your prey to avoid punishment, ah?"
"But if you don't go through the pockets until after-" Kakashi frowns as his father returns the hook knife to it's place in the box.
Tōsan, who's always pleased when he asks questions, beams while grabbing a blade that reminds him of the one that his father shaves with- flat and straight. "I keep prey unconscious until they're in the basement and I tie them up immediately when they arrive so they can't get to anything. There's also no service in the basement, which is why I set up shop here."
"Sharpen this," Tōsan says, handing the blade to him before going over to drag three empty trash cans over that were each different colors. Kakashi obeys, running the edge against the part of the table his father told him was a sharpener before testing the blade on the man who, for some reason, looks even more terrified then when Tōsan did it earlier.
"Just for tonight...Just for tonight...Just for tonight..."** is sung to the room before Tōsan finally returns.
"I like listening to music, it's relaxing." Tōsan tells him, placing a bucket of water on the table then adds while taking the blade, "This is good, I'm proud." Kakashi smothers a grin but he's sure his father can tell how pleased he is with how Tōsan ruffles his hair before focusing on the man, "It's important to the genitals, especially the balls, because it 'taints' the flavor otherwise. Do this first, so the hormones can get flushed out of the system- on that line of thought, if your prey is under the influence wait at least eight hours, though you can take care of the genitals still, so it's not as strong to alter the taste later."
Kakashi blinks, confused as his father shaves the hair surround the man's private area with practiced moves, "Flavor?"
"Aa," Tōsan tells him, dusting the cut hair away then wetting a rag to clear the rest until the area is entirely hairless. "I sometimes use the meat of prey for meals, it'd be a waste otherwise- usually as sausage, roast, stews and grilled. I use it in my Nikujaga."
The aforementioned nikujaga stew is one of Kakashi's favorite winter foods, one he'd tried to get Tōsan to cook once a week during winter though he'd only ever gotten his father to make it once every other week- though it always made an appearance for his birthday since his father usually made his favorite foods on that day.
"Oh," Kakashi says, realizing. "That's why you never told me what you used before."
"You were too young," Tōsan says, securing a ring to the base of the man's penis and using a ribbon to tie off where the man's balls connected to the body. "To avoid an unnecessary mess." His father explains, sharpening the knife once more. "I want you to use one of the brushes and coat the butcher's knife with what's in the red bottle."
He obeys as Tōsan goes to the man's head and starts shaving there , his father finishes a little before he does and takes the brush from him, putting it in the water. "Good, we'll be using that in a little bit." Tōsan tells him before cutting first the balls then the penis off the man, making the man- the prey - jerk and scream.
His father ignores the man, switches blades with him and uses a lighter to ignite the liquid coating the knife in a whoosh of flames before pressing the flat of the blade to where his father had just cut even before the flames sputtered out. "Cauterizing the wound to prevent any unnecessary mess or blood loss." Tōsan says, putting the knife in the bucket along with the, now useless, ring- the ribbon had burnt to nothing with the fire.
Tōsan maneuvers the table and the prey's legs so they're bent, hands him a knife that looks like a miniature katana and says "Cut a circle, about half to an inch deep, around the anus that's two inches wider then the anus then grab it and- gently- pull it out a bit before tying it off." before grabbing the flat blade once more and starting to shave the thick hair on the legs, chest and arms.
His father starts humming along to the music, still English though this time country, while they set to work and this time he finishes first so Tōsan sets him to coating the legs and arms with the same flammable liquid he had the butcher knife. Kakashi is even allowed to light the legs though he has to use the long-nosed lighter- he glances at the prey's face before he does, notes the snotty tears and the whimpering sounds it makes, and huffs in distaste then promptly lighting the legs on fire. He relishes in how the legs tense and spasm, trying to get away but kept in place by the restraints.
Tōsan set him to coating the shaved chest, swiftly lighting the arms and chest when he's finished before efficiently flipping the sobbing prey on it's stomach to repeat the entire process with the back though his father lets him play- making small puddles of liquid on the back then lighting them- while Tōsan lays out a sheet a bit away from the table then sets a meat gambrel on the table. His father straightens the legs then straps them together, doing the same to the arms before piercing the hands with the sharp hooks at the ends of the gambrel. Tōsan unstraps the prey from the table and hang it over the sheet before getting a familiar looking, six-inch knife.
From there it was much like how Tōsan butchered a pig though without the scalding because they'd already got rid of all the hair and, like when Kakashi had watched with the pigs, Tōsan starts singing to an English song he dubbed as an 'oldie'. The bones, with bits of meat, are put into the blue trash can for the dogs while meat- from the legs, arms and breast- is put in the green can for them but everything else (except the intestines that are left on the sheet to be burnt later) goes into the black can for the pigs.
Tōsan covers the cans, turns the music off then picks him up. "Good boy," his father murmurs to him as he sleepily rests his head on Tōsan's shoulder, letting out a pleased hum at the praise. "You did great. I'm so proud of you Kakashi."
Kakashi falls asleep in his father's arms, happy to have another thing to do with Tōsan and eager for the next time.
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*from the song "My Blood" by Ellie Goulding.
** from the song "Delight" by Jamie Berry & Octavia Rose