AN- I was at the beach one day, and some parts of this happened, and i got this idea for a story. The things that happened to me will be apparent, and I'll just point them out at the end again. I hope you all like it! And I'm sorry if I have bad spelling, I'm considering asking one of my readers for my other story, WInd on the Seas, to be my beta, but i wan to see how things work out for now.

The chapter title is a song title. If anyone guesses it, well, I don't know much much about cookies, but I'll mention you in the next chapter with the answer!

Song used in story (not chap title)- Boulevard of Broken Dreams by Green Day

Washed Away- Chapter 1- Day In, Day Out

"Come on, bitch, Charlie and I wanna go to the beach," my mother, Renee, snarled at me as I lay wrapped up in one old, ripped blanket on the ancient bed that had been in my family for generations. It would probably collapse soon, with me in it. I wouldn't mind. Death would be a relief from this torture that I live through.

Feeling the ratty blanket torn off of me, I sat up quickly and bolted out of my bedroom door, heading for the bathroom that was down the hall. One of the only rooms in the house with a lock.

My feet pounded on the floor in a panic as Renee registered what had happened and ran after me. Just as I closed the peach colored bathroom door, turning the knob and the lock in one swift motion, I both felt and heard Renee pounding into the door at a dead run.

Giving up the fight with the door, she growled, "Alright then, Isabella, get changed into a bathing suit and shorts and a tank top. We don't want to leave you home alone, now do we? We can't trust a little rat like you in a house all by yourself. You might do something to displease us. Put on those clothes I told you to, you need to look presentable for the public. Good for nothing, but you need to be good looking to represent us, you little shrew, witch….." Renee continued to cuss me out, taunting me as I could hear her give in completely and walk down the stairs that lead into the kitchen.

I let out a held breath in relief. That was close. She almost made it in that time.

My parents hate me. They're all into the drugs and drinking and stuff. Whenever they can, they take turns beating me. It all started the day I turned thirteen.

Flashback

It was September 12. My 13th birthday. I barely had any friends to name, so my parents would always get me a little something and take me out for my birthday.

This year, they got into drinking and drugs. It was horrible. They were always yelling at each other or at me. Mostly me.

I was leaving school, smiling in anticipation of a great night and maybe a new present. My parents worked late every night, so I walked home on a regular basis. They were supposed to come home early today for me, though. Walking through my front door after the two mile hike, I called, "Mom? Dad? Where are you?"

No one answered. But when I took a closer look, I saw the broken beer bottle on the hall floor. Shards of amber glass shimmered sinisterly in the sunlight. Suddenly, a shadow moved in the gloom. No lights at all but the sunlight that broke through the crystal glass windows illuminated the shape of someone moving towards me out of a dark corner.

"Hello, Bella. We have a surprise for you."

End Flashback

That day, everything changed. When I had gotten home, my parents duct taped my mouth shut before I could even register what was happening. It was all so unexpected. They dragged me downstairs somehow, into the basement with no windows that I never went into and was hardly ever used. Then, the unthinkable happened. My mom, loveable, never hurt a fly Renee, stripped me down, and my gruff, shy dad, raped me.

It continued for years ever since. Whenever they were displeased with anything, they beat me. Carefully. They didn't want to leave a visible scar for the neighbors to ogle at. Occasionally, my dad came into my room at night with more duct tape. They'd cuss at me every time that they even saw me. This morning was just like any other that I'd had in the past four years.

Sighing, I peeled off my holey tee shirt and shorts to climb into a cold shower. I'd discovered that they could tell when I used hot water to shower, and then beat me for it. So I just take cold showers now. I'm sadly used to it.

Rubbing my strawberry shampoo into my tangled, dull brown hair soothed me. Whenever I was by myself, like in the shower, I could just let go and forget everything. I could let myself pretend things were like they used to be. It was a cruel joke I continuously played on myself. But it was one that never got old. I was able to lose myself.

I clambered out of the shower, drying myself off with an old, white towel briskly. Since there was no steam on the mirrors, I started to examine my face.

I have a pale ivory complexion. I could've been half albino. My dull brown eyes matched my dull brown hair that reached down half of my back in straight waves. Dark purple circles were under my eyes, giving me a look of the dead. I looked completely downtrodden and ugly and haggard. My parents always told me I was good for nothing and hideous. They must be right.

Reaching under the sink and into the wooden cabinets, I groped around for my bathing suit and the clothes that I kept in here for just these sort of mornings. Leaving the bathroom in nothing but a towel at all was a very bad idea. One of them might be outside waiting for me.

The bikini was completely black. It was tight and very form fitting, too, which was one reason that I tried to keep from wearing it. In the sunny state of California, though, it was kind of hard to not wear a bathing suit every once in a while.

Grudgingly, I pulled it on and looked in the mirror again. The midnight halter top hugged my chest, probably to make what I had look more appealing. Great. The bottoms were very low riding hipsters that hugged the curves of my hips. Laying flat on the bone to either side were black squares that held the hipsters together. If I wasn't always endangered by the crazy parents, I might actually have liked the suit.

My tank top went on next. It was a light blue cami that ended right above my belly button, leaving a few inches of space so that my hip bones were visible. My low rise jean shorts with button pockets hung of my waist loosely and where washed a lighter color, not quite white, but almost a green or yellow.

Grabbing the blow dryer, I started on my boring, straight, dull brown hair. Although it might take a half an hour to actually dry it, it gave me more time away from my tormentors. A sidebang that reached down past my chin covered the left side of my face almost completely, leaving my eye barely visible. It curved in a wave around my face, feather light.

Throwing on my black flip flops that I never wore, I opened the bathroom door again, and took a deep breath as I trod disconsolately down the stairs.

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoO

My parents were lazing around on the sunny beach off of the city of San Francisco where we lived in Cali. Stretched out on towels in the white sand, they laughed and talked as if our family was completely normal. Which, of course, it isn't.

"Bella," Renee called in a sickeningly sweet voice, "why don't you go do something? Go in the ocean or make a sand castle or something."

"Sure, mom," I said. Arguing with Renee now would just get me into huge trouble later.

I decided on digging a hole. I only had my hands to dig with but it would please Renee and Charlie.

I stripped down to my too revealing bikini, leaving my shirt and shorts in the sand forlornly. I had no visible scars from the numerous beatings because Charlie would always come up and give me an ointment that had been passed down for generations to prevent scarring. To me, it was a sick joke. There were no visible reminders or evidence of my demise. That didn't mean that there were no invisible scars, though. Oh no, I had way too many invisible scars to count.

I saw a few high school guys that looked to be seventeen, my age, turn to look as I stripped, but I paid no more attention and gave them no notice. They would stop staring at an ugly girl like me in a moment, anyway. I felt the hot sand burn my toes as I stared out into the ocean. Cool waves lapped at my feet, curling over my toes in caressing velvet. The sun was high overhead, glaring almost angrily over me. The seawater glistened in the sunlight, ripples breaking through the waves as white water surged up and flowed out onto the sand. The sky was a clear blue. The whole image felt serene, despite the angry sun. It was like a scene from a movie, where the two lovers kiss at the end as they stare out into the ocean after every horrible trial they endure is over and they're still together and happy.

I felt something hit my foot, and I looked down. A little purple bucket washed ashore and had smacked into me. I kneeled down to pick it up, and walked over to a spot in the sand far enough away from Charlie and Renee that they wouldn't hear me. Kneeling down again, I dug my hands into the itchy sand and started to dig. I alternated with the bucket to dig more quickly.

My hole was about three feet wide, and I dug deeper and deeper, letting my mind roam as my body relished the change in environment and the new work I was doing. Hours passed as the sun started to set over the ocean, changing the colors to blues, greens, oranges, purples, and bright reds. Still I dug deeper down, letting my emotions run wild. Every slap I endured, every painful night, every nasty word, every hurtful beating came out of me as I dug deeper yet, until I hit water. My height was about 5'4", and I could barely see out of the top of the hole. I'd worry about getting out when I actually needed to.

I felt every sour emotion that I had ever felt. The hurt of my parents' sudden change four years ago. The pain of broken bones and the numerous cuts I got. Feeling hair ripped out by its roots. Being nearly strangled as I felt my windpipe close as a crushing force smashed me into the wall by the throat and feeling the world go black at the lack of oxygen. Sleepless nights filled with terror as my mom and dad got drunk and high, then came up to "visit" me.

Anger and pain filled every fiber of my body. I took all of my anger out on the poor, defenseless sand. Then, I did something that I hadn't in a while. I started singing.

I had played the guitar for years, ever since I had turned nine, and still had one in my room. I'd always write my own songs about the events in my life, and my emotions about things. My parents forbade me to write anymore after my songs became so angry and desolate, which was after they stared with the drugs, but I still played my electric Fender Stratocaster without the amplifier by night, once Renee and Charlie were passed out. They probably let me keep it so that I was more agreeable sometimes.

It was one of those songs that I had been forbidden to play. But one of those that came straight from my heart.

(Green Day- Boulevard of Broken Dreams)

I walk a lonely road
The only one that I have ever known
Don't know where it goes
But it's home to me and I walk alone

I walk this empty street
On the Boulevard of broken dreams
Where the city sleeps
And I'm the only one and I walk alone

I walk alone
I walk alone
I walk alone
I walk a-

My shadow's the only one that walks beside me
My shallow hearts the only thing that's beating
Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me
'Til then I walk alone

Ah-Ah Ah-Ah Ah-Ah Ahhh-Ah
Ah-Ah Ah-Ah Ah-Ah

I'm walking down the line
That divides me somewhere in my mind
On the border line of the edge
And where I walk alone

Read between the lines of what's
Messed up and everything's all right
Check my vital signs to know I'm still alive
And I walk alone

I walk alone
I walk alone
I walk alone
I walk a-

My shadow's the only one that walks beside me
My shallow hearts the only thing that's beating
Sometimes I wish someone out there would find me
'Til then I'll walk alone...

Ah-Ah Ah-Ah Ah-Ah
Ahhh-Ah Ah-Ah Ah-Ah
I walk alone
I walk a-

I walk this empty street
On the Boulevard of broken dreams
Where the city sleeps
And I'm the only one and I walk a...

My shadows the only one that walks beside me
My shallow hearts the only thing that's beating
Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me
'Til then I'll walk alone

I sang my heart out, nearly in tears by the time I finished the song. My voice was rough and scratchy, but it didn't matter anyway. The emotions that I had while I wrote that song were still raging within me, just as strong as ever. Day in and day out I knew them. Hopelessness. Loss. Anger. Longing. Need. Pain. I knew those emotions better than I would have ever dreamed. To my infinite sorrow.

I was startled when I realized that I was chest deep in sand and water. My eyes widened and I started to panic. The water started rushing around me faster, and my eyes widened in even more horror as I realized that I had hit an underground current.

I tried futilely to climb my way back out, but the sand crumbled in my hands. "HELP! MOM! DAD!" When I called the parents, I stopped in shock. Do I really want to go back to that life? No.

The water surged more furiously than I thought possible. The sand slipped more out of my grasp. Hungrily, what had before seemed like velvet clawed at me, dragging me like a monster dragging its prey back into its cave. A realization hit me, and I jolted in shock.

I didn't have to go back. I didn't have to go back to the endless pain. I could end it right here. No more pain. No more anger. No more Renee and Charlie. Just endless bliss.

I closed my eyes as the water swirled in anticipation. My fingers slipped a little more. I let out a final breath. And I made my choice.

I let go.

How'd I do? Hit or miss? Oh, i dug a hole at the beach and it was almost six feet deep when i hit water. And I couldn't get out! My sister had to drag me out, funny. I'm forbidden from digging holes now becaus e of underground currents ;P I don't no much about abuse, so I'm leaving it a little sketchy for now. Sorry!

Please please please... REVIEW!! I NEED YOUR OPINIONS!!