Sherlock / john
"Sherlock, you look pale did you get any sleep yesterday" john asked looking genuinely worried he rested the back of his hand on Sherlock's forehead "you're running a fever!"
"I'm fine john" he took the other`s hand and kissed it gently
John pulled back his hand and looked astonished "Sherlock!" he took a step back "why are you doing this. Sherlock." He took a deep breath and rest his hand on Sherlock's head and then exhaled "Irene is gone Sherlock and I'm sorry I can't do this…I just can't" john turned and stepped toward the kitchen "should I make you some tea ? it might help you relax" john turned to look at him and immediately wish that he hadn't Sherlock looked hurt. Hurt beyond words he looked as if …as if he was about to cry john looked away "milk ?" . "john.." Sherlock said with a slightly rasped voice.. "don't do that Sherlock"
"do what ?" , "calling out my name with that voice "
"john ! how many times do I have to tell that I love you " , "Sherlock you don't love me you just think of me as a substitute for Irene ! " . "I never ..i never thought of you as a substitute john." , " Then why do you look so bloody miserable sherlock". "that's… ughh.. Because john ! just I cant believe that I did that to you .." Sherlock looked john straight in the eye his eyes were so …frail so weak they were red and puffy as if he was crying.. "sherlock " he was standing right in front of him so that Sherlock was looking up to him from his chair "Sherlock ..about that night its fine you just learned of her death and you lost it . it dosent matter" . shelock took hold of his hands and nearly screamed "It does matter john! That night matters ! it wasn't because of Irene I only liked her brain not her but you.. I love you, all of you, nobody and I mean that john Nobody knows me as well as you nobody understands me as well as you so …please john please don't leave me ..please love me as much as I love you" Sherlock held him by the waist and buried his face in john's sweater. "I love you john.." it came out muffled and a bit desperate but to john there was nothing clearer he pushed Sherlocks head away and knelt down tears already drowning his eyes and running down his face burning through his cheeks.. "I do love you Sherlock, ive loved you for as long as I remember" he pressed his lips against Sherlock and pulled back "are you telling the truth john do you really…love me ?" , "you tell me" he looked Sherlock straight in the eye "I love you Sherlock " he said and without feeling it his face broke into a smile and unable to resist it Sherlock smiled back at him and hugged him so tight he could feel his ribs breaking "you're smothering me" john said with a slight chuckle , Sherlock made a sound that was a half chuckle and half sigh, moments passed with them staying in that position john kneeling down on his knees hugging Sherlock and Sherlock hugging him so tightly as if within a minute he would wake and realize that this is a dream. Hopefully it wasn't