Obviously I do not own TPoH or the characters
Black. That's all the eight year old could see. But she was asleep, so anything other than black would have been unusual. She did, however, sense something unusual. Her ears groggily picked up a faint sniff, sniff nearby, and her nose caught a whiff of animal fur. Her eyes sluggishly cracked open, seeing a blur of green in front of her.
"Mmh..?" Hero mumbled, vaguely feeling RGB's arms still draped lazily around her.
The kelly green shape grew closer and nuzzled her cheek with a soft whine.
"H-huh?" The child jerked upright. Standing before her was a surreal creature resembling a dog with a wide, toothy grin. Its large head and yellow tail weren't properly attached to its body; they just hovered in their proper place. Even more bizarre, each of its legs was differently styled to where the limbs looked more like something from an abstract painting.
"Arf!" It yipped, letting his mismatched orange ears that flopped at the tips float over his head cheerfully. The dog buried its nose into Hero's hair curiously, trying to smell every single brown strand on her head.
"Heehee-that tickles!" She giggled. The dog tugged at her red coat and pulled her out of RGB's lap, onto her feet.
"Hi, there," The girl cooed, patting her new friend on the head. "Good boy." Well, at least she thought it was a boy-at any rate, she didn't want to call the dog 'it'.
"Arf! Arf!" His electric blue tongue dangled out of his mouth, matching his happy-go-lucky expression. The animal continued to smell her, sticking his invisible nose up and down her body. He circled around her as he continued to inspect her.
"Haha-s-stopit-haha-that tickles-hahaha!"
A minute later, the dog froze and glanced over her shoulder. Hero raised an eyebrow and turned around to where RGB was still sleeping, leaning against a tall gravestone. Transparent drool dripped out of the corner of his static projecting screen while his trademark boater hat threatened to fall off his head.
The sharply dressed man ensnared the dog's attention, and he dove under Hero's legs to get closer. Hero felt her bottom slide over his head and onto his back.
"W-whoa!" She waved her arms out to her sides to balance before she could topple over. The girl looked over the dog's head as he gave RGB's suit a thorough sniffing.
"Aroo?" The dog poked his nose at the man's screen, receiving no reaction from RGB. His body was as limp as an unused puppet, matching his droopy antennas. Puzzled, the canine pawed at RGB's dark gold bowtie. Still no luck; the man's screen remained filled with indistinct static.
"Hey, try licking his face!" Hero suggested with a slightly playful voice. "Nothing like a wet dog's kiss waking you up!"
The dog's toothy grin grew wide as he stared at his target. He pressed his bright blue tongue against the bottom of RGB's screen and slid it over the glass with a loud, disgusting shlaak.
RGB's screen didn't even flicker. The only difference now was the thick coating of slobber over the glass.
"Huh…" Hero muttered to herself. "Works on TV." Her dark eyes gazed over her friend's head, realizing the irony of her reasoning. She held her chin in her right hand while holding her elbow with her left.
"There's gotta be another way to wake him up…"
Suddenly, Hero's face converted into surprise as an idea took shape in her mind. At the same time, her four legged friend's ears perked up with inspiration, as if reading her mind. Mischievous grins blossomed on their faces as their eyes met. It was the kind of stare two parties share when they're plotting something.
If the whole world was reduced to a landscape of stark black and white, then everyone would have been able to witness the bizarre 'nightmare' RGB was experiencing. In front of him was a fat, sketchy X on the ground. The metallic scent in the air lingered with the echoing voices around him.
"MARK." The voice barked. "YOU'RE OFF YOUR MARK."
RGB whizzed his gaze around until he looked behind him, and froze. Looming above him was the front of an old fashioned house, falling towards him. Near the top was a large window that matched the size of the crudely drawn X he saw before. The mark where he would have been safe. But there wasn't enough time to reach it. It was a Buster Keaton movie gone horribly wrong.
"But that wasn't-"RGB's words vibrated through the heavy atmosphere as the house grew closer. "But this isn't-"
"…This isn't how I died."
The wall slammed against his face-or at least he though it did. One second the house was there, and erratic images were flashing before him the next. It was as if someone had taken an ancient collection of monochromatic films, scrambled the order of the scenes, and scribbled over specific areas with a charcoal pencil. RGB also had the distinct feeling that he was falling through an abyss where the hums of movie projectors vibrated all around him.
And then there was pain. A sharp, burning pain in his stomach. Hissing, RGB doubled over and hugged his abdomen.
"D-damn it," He cursed, helplessly shivering under the torture. "Damn, damn, damn it hurts!" So intense, so hot, so…
Wet.
"AAHAHGH!?"
RGB returned to the real, colorful world as he screamed. Shocked, he leaned too far back and fell over the tombstone with a CRASH!
"Urgh…" He muttered as he rubbed his right hand on his screen. When he pulled it away, he found his glove soaked with his rainbow saliva. The man looked closer, noticing the lilac and white color scheme of his glove. His entire attire had changed from golden yellow hues to a creamy white suit with bold red trims, soft grey-blue pants, and a purple bow tie.
However, he also discovered a vivid yellow stain on his shirt. Confused, he patted the spot, and immediately snatched his hand away, recognizing the burning sensation from his visions moments ago. Now awake, however, he took in the disgusting stench of the stain.
"What in the-?"
"G-good morning, RGB-pfft!"
RGB whipped his head up. Sitting on the back of a dog-like Idea was Hero, trying to contain her giggle. The man was about to order her to get off the innocent looking canine, but paused, noticing how one of the Idea's hind legs was hiked up in his direction. His gaze returned to the ugly splotch on his shirt, and then back at the creature.
Hero broke out laughing as she watched RGB's comical realization. The Idea barked and wagged his triangular tail as if in agreement. RGB's feelings, however, were not so jolly. Fuming, he hastily stood up and jabbed his finger at the dog.
"Bad Idea! Bad!" He yelled before glaring at Hero. "And you! Get off it!"
"We were-haha-were just trying t-to-pfft-wake you up-haHA!" The girl wheezed between laughs.
RGB's fists tightened in frustration. "You know how much I hate water! Getting me wet is bad enough, but this," He furiously pointed at the urine stain on his shirt. "This is an outrage!"
"Y-yeah-haha-outrageously funny!" The girl laughed so hard she nearly choked on her smile.
"What on earth possessed you to…?" His voice trailed off as he stared at Hero. Her normally brown eyes harbored an unearthly shade of glowing green. The strands of her coffee colored hair grew uneven in hue, just like her red coat and oversized boots.
She began to resemble the Idea she sat on.
"Oh, never mind," RGB growled, trying not to panic as he roughly plucked his hat from the ground and glared at the duo. "Just get off that Idea!"
"Aw, c'mon!" She whined with an insane grin plastered on her face. "You're no fun!"
"I don't care if you think I'm Mr. Sunshine or Mr. Scrooge!" He pointed at the ground. "Leave it! Right now!"
"But I don't want to!" Hero barked. "Why should I?!"
"Ideas are immortal! They eat you from the inside out! They change everything! It's changing you right now!" RGB's mouth fluctuated wildly as he yelled, desperate. "So get off! Before it possesses you completely!"
The girl paused, as if she was returning to her former self. "…Fine."
"Ah, capit-"
"But you'll have to catch me first!" Hero smirked like a troublemaker, cutting RGB short.
"Wait, what-?!"
"You heard me!" The girl barked like the Idea she sat on. Her steed spun around and sprinted away from the sharply dressed man while Hero threw a "Bet ya' can't catch me!" over her shoulder.
"Why…" RGB reached for his bamboo-like cane.
"You…" His fingers curled tightly around the wood.
"Little…" He held his cane in the air behind him.
"Delinquent!" With a swift swing, he threw his cane through the air.
Meanwhile, Hero's Idea galloped towards a thick patch of sunflowers. Before it could lay a paw on them, RGB's cane hooked around the child's thin neck. She heard him snap his fingers crisply, and immediately felt the cane pull her backwards at top speed. As the surreal Idea crashed into a tombstone hidden amongst the large sunflowers, Hero rammed into RGB's catch and felt her body being shoved under his right arm like a football.
"Wh…what happened?" She stuttered as her colors returned to their initial state. No longer looking like she had just jumped out of a Picasso painting, she heard RGB's response.
"Oh, not much-"He ran in the opposite direction of the Idea. "You were just getting carried away."
Hero looked around his white clad arm at the canine, which was staring at them eagerly. "He's getting back up."
"Oh goody." RGB deadpanned as the girl saw the Idea devour a chewy sunflower.
"And he's eating."
"They do that." The man leaped over a rectangular headstone. "Ideas feed on the world around them-"His red and white spat shoes crunched onto the dry grass as he landed. "Including the inhabitants-hence the running."
Hero turned back forward, about ask him why the very worst monster couldn't just chase it away, but her eyes caught sight of the ugly yellow stain still in his shirt. She remembered the humorous events from before and pressed her lips together to contain her giggle, but a chuckle still slipped out of her mouth.
RGB glanced down at her, then at his ruined shirt, and scowled. "We'll deal with that later," he hissed as he ran. "Really, how would you like it if I did that to you?"
"Wait, you can do that?" Hero raised an eyebrow. "You can pee?"
…
"…Let's just concentrate on running from the Idea for now."