"Why can't I just stop thinking about her?" Alex asked impatiently. Ever since he had admitted to himself he had feelings for Jo, his mind was in overdrive thinking about every possibility of how it could play out. The way he saw it, he had 3 choices: Man up, tell her, and hope it worked out (unlikely); not say anything and try to be nice to her d-bag boyfriend (manageable); or just kiss her and see how she reacts. Alex quickly ruled the last one out as an impossibility. He'd had too much crazy for one lifetime to take that kind of risk. He ran his hand over his hair and rested it on the dark pillow above him.
This is weird, he decided, lying in Christina's bed talking relationship problems. Her and Mere always seemed to be doing this kind of thing, so could it really be that bad?
"You know, if you got together she'd probably go crazy." Christina said matter-of-factly, looping her finger around her temple. "That happens a lot. Especially to you" she said.
OK, Alex decided, it is that bad.
"Whatever. I'm going home" Alex said. This was definitely not helping.
"So soon?" Christina questioned. She thought about it for a second. "You know, I'm pretty amazing. The power to make stupid people leave me alone." she said brilliantly.
"Don't flatter yourself, Yang. I'm on call tonight." He said walking out of the room.
"If worst comes to worst, remember: you can always fight this guy for the girl!" Christina called after him.
As he was approaching the hospital for the start of his shift, Alex's beeper went off (911) and he rushed to whatever child needed his help. Dodging nurses with ease, he rounded the last corner only to see Jo and her d-bag boyfriend making out in the hallway. "Let's move" Alex said, not bothering to look Jo in the eyes.
Jo loosened her grip and quickly fell in to stride behind a now agitated Alex Karev.
"I was just.. I mean, we were just…" Jo rambled.
"I don't want to hear it" Alex vehemently stated. "We've got a kid to save."
Alex walked into the OR confidently, watching the pulsing abdominal wound of the 8 year old on the table while scrubbing in. He had impaled himself on a tree, and Alex had told his parents that he would be fine. The truth was, with this kind of injury he couldn't be certain. It would take a great group of doctors working in sync to give him his life back. He thought he had that with Jo, but lately her mind had been elsewhere.
Alex noticed the scratches on Jo's arms as she was scrubbing in. "You alright?" Alex asked, genuine concern thick in his voice.
"It's nothing" Jo waved off his suspicions. "Besides, we have a live to save, don't we? Let's focus on that." Jo said a little too icily.
"How would you like to take over?" Alex asked a distraught looking Jo.
Jo got over what was bothering her and gracefully accepted the scalpel. Alex looked over, intently studying the gorgeous face as she worked. Right as Alex was noticing the paleness of her skin, he looked down to see blood oozing from the incision point. No time for trivial politeness, Alex grabbed a scalpel and prepared to take over.
"What did you do?" Alex demanded angrily. He quickly stepped in and all but pushed Jo to the side. "God damnit, I cannot find the source of this bleeding" Alex grunted, his hands rummaging the boy's intestines for signs of distress.
"Found it. You punctured his kidney, further damaging it. This kid is going to have to live with one kidney the rest of his life." Alex fumed. "Either pay attention or get the hell out my OR Jo.
After surgery, Jo was called into a meeting with the Chief of Sugery. Alex looked over in equal parts curiosity and remorse. Jo walked bitterly up to Alex once she was out. "It turns out that Jimmy had a diseased kidney and that was why it was so damaged. It wasn't my fault at all, so, thanks for completely humiliating me in there."
"Sorry" was all Alex replied with. Seeing that Jo was geared up for a fight, Alex dropped a hand on her shoulders sending reflexive shivers down her spine. "Look." Alex said sincerely. "I have enough crazy in my life right now. Can we just be cool again?"
Jo looked up, preparing to berate him for his mistakes, but, finding only sympathy and the patented Alex security, her anger smoldered and ebbed.
Alex sat at Joe's, taking in the silence after a long day at work. So entrenched in his own thoughts, he barely noticed when Jo came. She slid down in the chair next to him dejectedly and defeated. Still, she looked up at him with a hint of a smile on her face before drowning herself in a beer quickly served by the bartender.
"What are you pouting about?" Jo asked. "I'm the one that almost got fired today."
"Poor you." Alex smirked.
"Why were you so upset with me anyways?" she questioned.
"You mean besides the fact you could've cost that kid a kidney because you weren't paying attention?" Alex fired back. "You're an intern. I'm an attending." Alex stated. "I'm allowed to get mad at you. It's my job."
"I'm not talking about that. I'm talking about the fact that you ignored me the rest of the day. And yesterday."
"I'm an intern, but I'm also your friend. Look, when you freaked out at me professionally, I could understand. I'm an intern, you're a resident. That's what happens." Jo said. "But you are not allowed to ignore me the rest of the day. You are not allowed to get mad at me because I am kissing my boyfriend, or because you are having a bad day. That stuff is personal. That stuff you can't hate me over."
"I know." Alex said nonchalantly.
It annoyed Jo to no end that she was fuming while he was sitting there nonchalantly without a sound, probably laughing at her internally.
"Eugh." Jo grunted. "You're such a douche."
"More of a douche than your d-bag boyfriend?" Alex questioned. He meant it as a joke, but there was an indescribable truth in the tone underneath.
Jo paused for a second to contemplate her answer.
"Yes." she decided.
Alex soothed his pain with another drink and looked away with an overly loud "hmmpphh." To his surprise, Jo went on. She usually wasn't the 'talking about her feelings' kind of girl.
"You're more of a douche in that you are constantly changing your opinion of me." Jo concluded outwardly. "At least with Jason I know where I stand."
"He cares about me. I know you don't see it, but he really does." Jo said with a smile. "I know you care about me too, but it feels different, you know? Like one day you're here and things are great and then, for whatever reason, you're refusing to talk to me and are never around. I feel like you're hiding something from me. Something really big."
As Jo was talking she realised Alex would never answer. He was too much of a guy to talk about his feelings.
"I just don't get it. I don't understand what possible reason you would have for being so all over the place. I mean, do you want to hang out and grab drinks more often? Are you mad because I spend so much time with my boyfriend? Do you think I'm going to make a terrible surgeon? What are you hiding?"
Alex was tempted, naturally, to try and stop her before she reached the conclusion he made a long time ago. For some reason, he just couldn't. Maybe he just didn't want to avoid it anymore.
"I mean, the only possible reason for you to be acting so weird is if you either like me, or you have a really big secret." Jo looked over at Alex suspiciously. "Do you? Have a big secret?"
Alex shrugged.
"What is it? Married? Alien? Are you some serial killer or something?" Jo raised her eyebrows questioningly. "Do you hate puppies?" She laughed.
"It's not like that." Alex sighed.
"Then you obviously have some sort of feelings for me." Jo stated. She meant it jokingly, like was an impossible statement. After an immeasurable unit of time, she looked over at Alex, her curious eyes searching his. "You don't, do you?"
Something in his eyes made it click; Jo knew the impossible truth. That didn't mean she believed it.
Jo laughed. "You, having feelings for me?" Jo roared with laughter. "Don't get me wrong, you're cute and all - I mean when I first saw you, but now I just… I mean seriously." Jo laughed again. "Imagine if we-"
Alex, finally fed up with Jo's rambling, turned and leaned in, effectively stopping whatever joke she was about to make. Jo couldn't help holding her breath as his hand reached to pull her closer to him. Before she had any time to make a decision, Alex leaned in, his lips meeting hers in a moment of pure passion, effectively ending the conversation. Jo knew from the inexplicable tug in her heart that what she was getting herself into trouble, but couldn't find it within herself to stop. His lips were too soft, the moment too tender; there was no going back now. Not after she felt this.
"He finally did it." Meredith looked smug as she looked over and saw Alex and Jo making out in the corner.