Homefree - An Alternate Homestuck Story

by Sempiternal Decalescence

Four will gather, the Knight of Space and the Sage of Life, the Heir of Time and the Bard of Gust, and together, they will ascend! This is basically and all OC alternate Homestuck, so if you don't like the OCs, then don't read. Minor romantic pairings, but it is more towards the middle. Rated T for cursing and violence.

1. Act 1 Section 1 Part 1

Homefree

Act 1

Section 1

Part 1

Act 1-SBURB 1.0

Homefree.

A young man stands in his bedroom. Today, the 13th of April, is the day that this one man will do something great. He has no idea what he is going to do today, so technically you don't know either, although I told you about the…never mind. Now, this young man actually has no name. At least, you think he doesn't. He might actually have a name, but it isn't official because it isn't on his birth certificate. Oh, look at that. Getting off topic again. Now, give him a name.

Enter name.

FLABBY GRUBBUTT

Hell no!

Try again.

JASON BLACK

That seems more fitting for this man.

Jason: Examine room.

This is your room. The walls are covered in posters of your favorite games and movies, and you have a desk with a HackBook Bro laptop on the wall by the window. Opposite to it is your bed, which is pretty plain, and isn't worth describing, because it would make this story about ten to twenty words longer. You have a well-known hate for puppets and stuffed animals of all sorts. You often play video games on the computer and spend most of your days in your room. Here in the suburbs with your Bro, things aren't really very interesting. You have been long awaiting this day, for it is the day you finally receive the game you orders a couple months ago: SBURB. The game's beta testing finished a few years ago, but the game was delayed due to major bugs and extra content addition after testing. Now, we take you live to the time where we actually get things done.

Jason: Retrieve arms from pumpkin in the corner.

What pumpkin? You see no pumpkin, and it is hard to believe that there was any pumpkin within the general vicinity of your room at any time, because you cannot grow any sort of plant, and plants can't seem to grow around here. The local supermarket doesn't even sell pumpkins. Besides, your arms were already attached to your body by muscle, bone, skin, and tissue a little longer than thirteen years ago. And you absolutely hate pumpkins. Along with puppets and stuffed animals, of course.

Jason: Check computer.

All right then. You twist your head to take a look at your computer on the desk. You Pesterchum application is flashing, which means that you have a message from one of your chums.

Jason: Answer chum.

incompetentDude [ID] began pestering mentallyChallenged [MC] at 13:13

ID: hey man, whats goin up in that little suburban lifestyle of yours

MC: SBURB is what's happening up in this suburban lifestyle of mine.

ID: did you get it yet?

MC: Nope, but I'm about to. I just got to go check the mailbox. The truck came this morning.

ID: alright, maybe you can play it with HP

ID: shes been bothering me about the game since the second she got it

ID: i still dont have mine, but it should come soon

MC: Cool. Well, I'll try to get HP to stop breathing down your neck by playing the dang game with her.
ID: thanks

MC: No problem. Been wanting to play it since I ordered it anyways.

ID: see you in a few

mentallyChallenged [MC] ceased pestering incompetentDude [ID] at 13:16

Jason: Exit room into hallway.

Past your room is a short hallway, which branches off to the room where you bro does his DJ stuff to the right, and the game room to the left. There are many puppets scattered about that your brother inherited from his brother who is actually his dad. You utterly detest these stuffed sacks of filth and…disgusting plush rumps. You never really understood why the puppets had bottoms that had to be all jutting out and impudent and whatnot. Bro claims that he hates them too, but you doubt that highly.

Jason: Make your way to the front door, posthaste!

You scramble for the door with wild abandon but you are stopped by your Bro. He retrieves his katana from his Strife Deck. You feel that you are vaguely aware of what is about to take place. You retrieve your double-edged longsword from your Strife Deck and ready yourself for…

Jason: STRIFE!

The longsword clashes with the katana as you and Bro duel in the living room. He begins the showcase of badassery with some of his badass acrobatics. As he flips over you, you move your sword in a position to block the strike that your Bro is about to make to your back. The sound of metal on metal rings through the living room and you turn to make a counterattack. Your blade connects with his and you jump back to the door. Then he performs more badassery and appears behind you. You block just in time and stare him down, as he gives you the signal for a silent truce. You stand down and sheathe you sword and place it back into your Strife Deck. Bro does the same, and gives you a small nod. The nod is returned, and he disappears in a final display of badassery.

Jason: Get some snacks from the fridge in the kitchen.

After the intense conflict with Bro, you start to feel a gaping hole in your stomach. Travelling to the kitchen from the living room is a short trip. You walk over to the fridge, place your hand on the handle and brace yourself for the flood of those mad snacks, yo.

Jason: Mad snacks, yo!

The delicious, fun-filled Fruit Gushers spill out of the fridge with a passion. A desire. A hunger. A goddamn storm of raging Fruit Gushers! Quickly captchaloging several packets, you split one open and let fly with all of those fucking fruit-filled beauties. The resulting taste in your mouth is one that cannot compare with any other. It is the taste of victory. It is the taste of freedom. It is the taste of justice. It is the taste of GODDAMN GUSHERS! You love these things.

Jason: Go back upstairs and talk to ID.

Deciding to put off the retrieval of the game for a while, you sprint back up the stairs and pass the threshold that separates your room from the rest of the house. Crashing into your chair, you pull up to your desk and begin pestering ID again.

mentallyChallenged [MC] began pestering incompetentDude [ID] at 14:01

MC: Hello once again, my fellow asshole.

ID: oh

ID: hi there jason

MC: Wassup?

ID: still getting pushed around by HP

MC: Ah. Is she being the little insufferable prick that we have all come to know and love?

ID: that she is, jason, that she is

MC: Well then, I better talk to her.

ID: wait

ID: have you gotten the game yet?

MC: No. I had a run-in with Bro, and then a craving for some mad snacks.

ID: and by that i can only assume that you are referring to your beautiful gushers

MC: I am in fact referring to those same beautiful Gushers.

ID: aw shit man, i just bought a pack today

ID: gonna have to break into it and imbibe like the wind

MC: All right then. You do that. I'm going to go have a talk with HP.

ID: good

mentallyChallenged [MC] ceased pestering incompetentDude [ID] at 14:05

Jason: Pester HP.

A/N: I think I did pretty well for the first chapter. Let me know in the review section guys! Thanks for reading, and I hope you continue reading this story over the long 15-17 Acts it will be stretching. With intermissions, of course. :3

~Jason Smith, Writer and Editor of Homefree