Beat the Heat – A fictional piece inspired by Hades' unnecessary use of the phrase 'Feel the heat'. Written and planned by both Mizu-Licious and .Indulgence.-


"Vexen! Report."

"Well…"

The World That Never Was had always been a naturally peacefully place for Nobodies. Outside of Castle Oblivion, the heartless and other creatures remained at a respectful distance, showing their immense fear of the thirteen figures that resided within the large citadel. However, on this particular day, with it being well into the morning, things had gone horribly awry. Unlike the normal stormy skies and slightly chilly weather, the temperature had spiked, hitting almost one hundred-seven degrees. It disturbed the natural balance of well… everything.

"I'm not entirely sure, Superior," The Chilly Academic spoke, brushing a strand of platinum hair from his view before continuing, "But from what I saw, Saix plus heat equals nothing pleasant. Apparently the man had been a serial rapist in his past life. Number Two is holding a group of other members hostage in his quarters, none of which I can identify. The fire-headed one is burning down the library as we speak, I can assume, while Larxene—well… I'm not entirely sure I want to know what she had been up to."

Heaving jadedly, the bronzed male shifted slightly in his leather seat, enjoying the cool air flowing from the room's air conditioner. Both men sat in a somewhat comfortable silence until Xemnas' smooth, alluring voice broke through the tranquility.

"How long do you think this will last, Number Four?"

Though Vexen had fully intended on answering his commanding officer, he was not given the chance to respond, an explosion blasting his door, and his voice, into the wind.

"Yo!" There, in the newly made, jagged doorway, stood Number Two, his well kept ponytail blowing gently in the artificial breeze. "Vexen, I'm gonna have to borrow ya for a minute. Hope you don't mind!"

Knowing he stood no chance against the heat crazed member, Vexen allowed himself to be dragged from the room by his sleeve, chancing a glance toward Xemnas to find the man staring blankly ahead. Clearly he'd been sent into shock.

Meanwhile, just next door, Xaldin had witnessed it all through the unnecessarily large hole blown into his wall (which he would later refer to as a 'Window to the new world') before the aftershock had sent him, and his rapidly spinning lancers, through the only real window in his living space.

Fighting desperately to keep himself even partially afloat, the large, burly man managed to find his balance just before making contact with the ground, landing only a foot or two above it. However, though he had narrowly avoided his own death, the same could not be said for the rose garden his blades were currently obliterating.

"Oh… my God!" Xaldin, after hearing the soul shattering cry, immediately stopped his weapons, landing unceremoniously onto the bed of flowers, killing all that remained.

"Uh...Marluxia...there's no possible way I could make this better with any words I say...I ..." The Whirlwind Lancer stammered slightly, dismissing his armaments as he stood quickly. "I'm so sorry for mutilating your flowers beyond recognition...but...hey, you can get new prettier ones, right?"

It took only a moment for the Graceful Assassin to lose his grief stricken stupor before releasing yet another heart wrenching cry, his tight fitting coat flapping in the wind behind him as he took off, leaving Xaldin to his own devices in the decaying shrubbery.

"Well, Greens—er… Browns." Xaldin mumbled into the stifling air around him, gaze fixed onto the rapidly wilting patches of vegetation. "Guess it's just you and me."

The early morning had not been so hectic for all of Organization Thirteen. It started simply with the Graceful Assassin, sensing something to be amiss, deciding to awaken several hours earlier than planned. The botanist Nobody shuffled meagerly from his bed, throwing on his traditional Organization Cloak before moving to exit his room.

Within the time it had taken the rose haired Nobody to skitter down the hall and far through the castle, Xemnas, his stick-up-the-butt superior, had grabbed a steaming cup of coffee and followed along innocently with a nearly melted copy of "Kama Sutra for Dummies".

"How are you fairing, Number Eleven?" Taking a small sip of his drink, Xemnas watched calmly as the male beside him began to mumble anxiously.

"I'm fine this blistering hot morning, Superior. I sensed a small disturbance in my force and I fear that my mojo is missing." The finely tanned male smiled, opening his book to what seemed like a random page.

"You're an odd one but, in the end, you're such a good underling, Marluxia—Like a dog. You never cause any problems. Even though Axel burned your garden to the ground."

Xemnas' step didn't falter, even as Marluxia had stopped walking entirely, fear, shock, and horror written plainly on his 'boyishly cute' features. With an indignant squeak, Marluxia watched his leader turn and smile condescendingly, lifting his mug to take yet another sip.

"It's pretty gruesome—I don't think you want to see it." There was only a moment of silence between the two before the (not so) Graceful Assassin released an ear splitting screech, bolting off toward an unknown destination.

Of course, Xemnas, having nothing better to do aside from torture his most sensitive neophyte, followed along leisurely, grinning to himself in guilty pleasure.

"Oh my baby—I promise daddy will never leave you! I'm so sorry!" Finding the smaller Nobody in the kitchen, coddling his last remaining plant, Xemnas took the time to re-fill his cup, not wanting to taste cold coffee. "Oh God. Why is this happening to me? I swear to you, Petunia, I'll never let you go!"

Amber eyes took note of the figure moving across the kitchen toward the fridge, no doubt to get some of the special water his plants craved so much. Scuffling toward the small flower, Xemnas took a rather large gulp of his steaming coffee, cringing without delay at the taste and temperature.

"This tastes like shi—" Dumping the drink out carelessly, he noticed far too late that he had upturned his cup into the plant's pot, killing the colorful flora instantly.

Marluxia noticed immediately, however, his jaw, and jug of water, hitting the floor harshly.

"Oops…"

Rich cerulean orbs became tearful, Marluxia's knees weakening and eventually giving out as he crashed to the ground in a disheveled heap. Xemnas couldn't contain his fit of chuckles, placing his dishware in the sink before leaving Marluxia to deal with his losses on his own.

"So silly, Number Eleven. It's just a flower." Just as the door shut behind him, an inhumane scream had broken through the relative silence of Castle Oblivion, waking several other members from their much needed slumber.

It didn't faze the silver haired male, his steps echoing in the quiet hallway as he made his toward another one of his subordinates. As he neared the door to Number Four's laboratory, he found himself crushed against the nearest wall, a certain blue haired berserker Nobody feeling him up in places that should never be man-handled.

"Ho-shit!"

A feral growl was all he was given in response as Saix's inappropriately large hands continued to move, gripping him up in all the wrong ways.

"I don't quite appreciate this, Number Seven! Could you remove that hand from my—"

"Uh, Xemnas, sir?" Glancing off to his right, Xemnas caught sight of his one of his more intelligent lackeys, Vexen's piercing blue eyes staring directly into his own amber gaze.

While the two shared a quiet, understanding moment, Saix continued to fondle his leader, even going as far as to attempt to remove the man's coat.

"Uh… Saix?" Once again, only a rumble of a growl from deep within Saix's chest, the man's mouth intently latched onto the column of Xemnas' golden-brown throat.

Xemnas, as brilliant a man as he was, had only remembered his trustworthy paperback when he'd felt one of those hands trailing none too gently up his thigh. Giving one strong handed shove, he began repeatedly smacking the book against his rapist's face, brows drawn in concentration.

"You might… want to come inside now, Superior. Sir."

Meanwhile, as Xemnas fought off his favorite Nobody—yes, he quite often played favorites—Marluxia was no longer left alone in the quaint kitchen as Roxas, clad in only a t-shirt and his graffiti covered panties, stumbled tiredly into the room. Marluxia didn't need to watch to know what he was up to for you see, Roxas was quite well known for his not so often but completely insatiable sweet tooth.

After retrieving the stool left for Zexion and himself, Roxas placed the mini-steps by a counter beneath the cabinet containing the blond's highly desired treat. Once said delicacy had been acquired, a bottle of Aunt Jemima's buttermilk syrup, Roxas put away his little ladder and took a seat at the table.

"So, Marlu. What's with the heat?" Popping open the cap, Roxas began guzzling the sugary, sticky fluid, not at all bothered when it seeped from his mouth in excess.

Marluxia didn't respond, however. He simply sat there in his corner, holding his knees as he dare not utter a word.

"Marluxia?" Pausing mid drink, but not mid pour, Roxas glanced casually toward the shivering, effeminate male, feeling slightly worried for his sanity.

His affectionate concern had only lasted a few seconds though as he began to allow the sickly sweet syrup to overflow his tiny adolescent mouth.

"'Ey yo, Ro…xas…" The smaller boy ignored the red-headed pyromaniac in favor of caressing the liquid running along his chin, throat, and his shirt. "This is… highly erotic and so nauseating."

"Ey dudes. Anybody spotted the water boy?" A head of black, gray streaked hair popped into the kitchen, ochre orbs skimming over the inhabitants of the room.

He was rewarded with no answer, however, as Axel had been far too busy molesting the syrup sucking Roxas while Marluxia cowered miserably in the corner, alone.

"Uh… dudes? I'll take that as a no… Roxas!"

The blond halted his task of drinking the bottle dry to look to the elder member, his voice demanding attention.

"Yes, Xigbar? Sir. Mister. Guy in charge." Xigbar gave the boy a peculiar look before opening his mouth to continue what he'd planned to say. Well. He would have continued had the boy not interrupted him. Again. "Boss."

The taller male scowled for a moment before smirking lightheartedly.

"Be a good boy and go find Demyx for me. I have a great plan in mind and I'm gonna need the water dude." Roxas nodded slowly, allowing Axel one last kiss to his sticky, sugar coated lips.

Axel, in turn, glared heatedly at the scarred member as his very own delicious treat teetered awkwardly through the door.

"Fucking pedophile—I wasn't done with that!" Came Axel's despondent jibe at the older Nobody, his haughty sneer nagging Axel down to his very core.

"Pedophile? As if!" Xigbar chuckled at Axel's bad choice of insult, waving him off as if he were nothing.

Leaving the two to bicker madly, one far more serious than the other, Roxas began his search for the water loving nobody, treading down the muggy hallways all the while attempting to lick the sweet syrup from his chin.


Mmm--a tad short. Feedback would be nice anyway. "It sucks" or "Why would you post this when we've been waiting for Riku's New Pet!" Whatever's good.